好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S05E08
Part 3
Nov. 17, 2020, 2:07 p.m.
Really?
真的?
Can he sue me?
他能告我吗?
Did you sign a contract?
你签过合同吗?
What time's the concert?
音乐会什么时候?
Okay,see you saturday night.
好吧 周六晚上见
Wait,wait,wait,11:00 A.M.
等等 早上11点?
Who goes to concerts at 11:00 A.M.
谁早上11点去听音乐会啊
Oh,yeah.
哦 是啊
Stupid kids.
傻小孩
*A quarter to 1:00 you want to have a little fun you brush your teeth chh,chh,chh,chh...*
* 一点缺一刻 你想玩得开心 就刷牙 嚓嚓嚓
what are you watching?
你在看什么?
The master at work.
同行的高手
** And you wake up in the morning and it's quarter to 2:00 you want to find something to do you brush your teeth chh,*
* 早上醒来 两点缺一刻 你想找事做 就刷牙
** chh,chh,chh,chh,chh you brush your teeth...*
* 嚓嚓嚓 刷你的牙
oh,raffi,you magnificent son of a bitch.
拉菲 你个了不起的狗♥娘♥养♥的
How do you do it?
你怎么做到的?
How does he do it,alan?
他怎么做到的 艾伦?
What's he got that I don't?
他有什么我没有的?
Well,based on first impressions,I'd say a genuine love of children and bladder control.
根据第一印象 我得说他真爱孩子 又善于控制膀胱
Oh,that was just a cheap shot.
真是贱招
I take 'em when I get 'em.
换作我 我也接受
Look at him,all relaxed and smiling.
看看他 轻松自如 满脸笑容
Last time I was in front of an audience like that,
我最后一次这样面对观众
it was the seventh grade talent show.
是在7年级的歌♥唱比赛上
I started shaking,sweating.
我开始发抖 出汗
I felt like I wanted to throw up.
感觉要呕吐
Don't forget peeing in your pants.
别忘了你还尿裤子
You keep pitching me fat ones.
是你不停向我抖猛料的
I'm not talking to you anymore.
我再也不睬你了
Oh come on,look,if you knew in seventh grade that you couldn't perform,
得了吧 如果你7年级就知道自己不能表演
why'd you become a musician?
那干吗成为音乐家?
Because there's one thing I'm more afraid of than an audience.
因为有一样东西比观众更可怕
What's that?
是什么?
An honest day's work?
老老实实地干一天活?
If you knew the answer,why'd you ask the question?
你用得着明知故问吗!
Charlie waffles!
查理 华夫饼干!
Where the hell is he,alan?
他到底在哪 艾伦?
I don't know.He said he wanted to take a walk to calm himself down.
不知道 他说出去走一圈冷静一下
I promise you,I will crucify that son of a bitch.
我保证 我要让那个狗♥娘♥养♥的不得好死
The two of you are going to be living in box over a heating vent when I get through suing him.
当我起诉完他 你俩就去住热风孔上的小盒子吧
Could it be a box with a guest room?
能给个有客房♥的盒子吗?
Charlie: Hey,alan...
嗨 艾伦...
I figured out what went wrong in seventh grade.
我弄明白7年级出的是什么问题了
What?
什么?
I hadn't started drinking yet.
那时我还没喝酒
Charlie,you have to get out there.
查理 你得上场了
You're right.
你说得对
The little bastards await.
小兔崽子们在等着呢
You can't sue him if he just stinks,right?
你不能因为他一身酒气而起诉他 对吗?
who loves kids?
谁最喜欢孩子?
Charlie waffles!
查理 华夫饼干!
You're damn right!
你们真♥他♥妈♥的对!
that one's not on the cd.
这个CD上没有
Let's try this again.
我们再试一次
** I drink from a sippy cup,sippy cup,sippy cup I drink from a sippy cup *
* 我喝学习杯 学习杯 学习杯 我喝学习杯
* 'cause I'm a big kid now *come on!
* 因为我是大大鸟 * 一起来!
** I drink from a sippy cup,sippy cup,sippy cup I drink from a sippy cup *
* 我喝学习杯 学习杯 学习杯 我喝学习杯
** 'cause I'm a big kid now bye-bye,boobies...*
* 因为我是大大鸟
they love him.
他们爱他
How can they love him?
他们怎么能爱他?
Who cares?
谁在乎?
We're gonna make a fortune.
我们要发大财了
Doesn't it bother you that he's loaded?
你就不烦他醉醺醺的样子?
He's a musician.
他是音乐家
It'd bother me if he wasn'T.
他不醉我才烦呢
** Bye-bye,boobies,bye-bye,boobies bye-bye,boobies 'cause I'm a big kid now.*
* 拜拜咪♥咪♥ 拜拜咪♥咪♥ 拜拜咪♥咪♥ 因为我是大大鸟
who loves boobies?
谁最爱咪♥咪♥?
Charlie waffles!
查理 华夫饼干!
Right.
对啦
** I love boobies,I love boobies I love boobies 'cause I'm a big kid now come on!*
* 我爱咪♥咪♥ 我爱咪♥咪♥ 我爱咪♥咪♥ 因为我是大大鸟
** I love boobies,I love boobies I love boobies 'cause I'm a big kid now...*
* 我爱咪♥咪♥ 我爱咪♥咪♥ 我爱咪♥咪♥ 因为我是大大鸟
hi. Hey.
嗨 嘿
What are you doing up so late?
干吗那么晚还不睡?
I couldn't sleep.
我睡不着
Something bothering you?
什么事让你心烦?
It's nothing.
没什么
Oh,come on.
说嘛
I'm your brother.
我是你大哥
You can tell me anything.
你对我可以无话不说
well,the truth is...
事实是...
your life has been going so great lately,it's been bringing up a lot of old resentment in me...
你近来生活蒸蒸日上 激起了我的新仇旧恨
Who loves kids?
谁最喜欢孩子?
Charlie waffles!
查理 华夫饼干!
For the first time anywhere,if your kids love charlie waffles,
无论哪里 孩子一旦爱上查理 华夫饼干
they'll love him even more live!
他们会更爱他的现场表演!
** When mom's a big meanie and serves you zucchini what do you do?*
* 妈妈变成吝啬鬼 喂你吃夏南瓜 你该怎么办?
** What do you do?*
* 你该怎么办?
** Feed it to the dog woof!*
* 拿去喂小狗 旺!
** Feed it to the dog woof!*
* 拿去喂小狗 旺!
That's right.
没错
Charlie's first sold-out concert can be yours on dvd for only $29.99
查理的首场热门音乐会 DVD只要29.99美元
** Who barfed in the fishbowl?*
* 谁吐在鱼缸里?
** Who could it be?*
* 到底是谁呢?
** Who barfed in the fishbowl?*
* 谁吐在鱼缸里?
** Oh,wait,it's me!*
* 噢等等 是我
** Fish food,fish food,I madeshome fi s food fish food,fish food *
* 鱼食 鱼食 我做了鱼食
*mommy,come aee.
* 妈妈过来瞧
Nd s announcer: Plus,if you order now...
如果现在就订购...
you know what's funny,alan?
你知道哪里好笑吗 艾伦?
I was so hammered,I have no memory of that concert.
我醉得一塌糊涂 音乐会上的事一点都不记得了
Gee...
唉
that is funny.
真搞笑
Oh,charlie waffles?
哦 查理 华夫饼干?
Yeah,baby?
什么事 宝贝?
Who loves boobies?
谁爱咪♥咪♥?
Coming!
来了!
Excuse me.
失陪
Time to butter up the old waffle.
该去伺候老华夫了
Yeah,well,thanks for the talk.
谢谢你跟我谈心
What talk?
什么谈心?
Go.
去
Butter.
伺候吧
It's potty time,can't hold it can't hold it!
小便时间到 摒不住 摒不住啦!
Can't hold it!
摒不住啦!
Potty!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
Pot-tay!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
I'm not wearing a diaper and I'm not in the pool
我没穿尿布 我没在浴缸
get out of the bathroom,gotta go,fool!
离开浴室 该走了 小傻瓜!
Potty!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
It might be number one,it might be number two
也许是第一 也许是第二
I don't know yet and neither do you potty!
我还不知道 便壶你也不知道!
Potty!
便壶!
Potty!
便壶!
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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