好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S02E22
Part 1
Nov. 17, 2020, 12:10 p.m.
Charlie? Where's Charlie?
查理 查理哪去了?
Check the living room.
看看客厅
Charlie, guess what? Somebody call me?
查理 你猜怎么着 有人叫我?
Not me.
不是我
He's not in the living room.
他不在客厅
Try his bedroom. Thanks.
看看卧室
Charlie, you gotta see this.
查理 你得过来看看
Are you sure nobody's calling me?
你确定没有人喊我吗?
Wouldn't I tell you?
有我不会告诉你吗?
Berta, he's not in his room.
波塔 他不在卧室里
What? I said, he's not in his room.
什么? 我说他不在他卧室
What?
什么?
Did you find him? He's not up there.
找到他了吗? 他不在楼上
Try Jake's room. What'd he be doing in Jake's room?
看看杰克房♥间 他在杰克房♥间里做什么?
Hey, I'm just trying to help.
我只是在帮你忙
I'm sorry. Charlie!
抱歉 查理
I'm sure I heard something.
我很确定听到有人喊我
I don't know what to tell you.
我不知道该和你说什么
I could do this all day.
我可以整天都这样玩
Charlie.
查理
Hey, Alan.
嘿 艾伦
Didn't you hear me calling you? Oh, that was you.
没听见我在喊你吗? 原来是你
Of course it was me. Who else would it be?
当然是我了 要不还有谁
Don't snap at me.
不要对我这么凶
I've been running all over looking for you.
我为了找你整个房♥子到处跑
Well, I was right here.
我就在这
I know that now.
我现在当然知道啦
Hey, that's no reason to have a hissy fit.
没必要发飙嘛
Hissy fit? This is not a hissy fit.
发飙? 这可不是发飙
Say it higher, Alan. A couple of dogs in the neighborhood didn't hear you.
声音再大点 艾伦 隔壁有几条狗狗还没听到
I'm all done. I'm going home now.
我下班要走了
Thank you. Good night.
晚安 波塔 晚安 波塔
Good night, my pets.
晚安 我的小玩偶们
Now that you've managed to find me, what do you want?
你找了我一整晚 有何贵干?
There was something I was excited to show you, but now I don't want to.
刚才想给你看点有意思的东西 现在不想了
I'm okay with that. So am I.
我无所谓 我也是
Oh, come on. You gotta see this.
拜托 你得来看看
All right. Fine.
好吧
Hey. Wait a minute.
等会
Did Berta know you were out here?
波塔知道你在外面吗?
Very mature, Alan. Blame the maid.
很成熟嘛 艾伦 怪在女佣头上
Oh, you bought a Porsche.
你买♥♥了架保时捷
"Porsche." What do you think?
波夏 (Porsche的法语发音 显得更高贵), 觉得怎样?
It's cute.
可爱
What do you mean, cute?
说可爱是什么意思?
I mean, it looks like my car's hot little girlfriend.
看起来象我靓车的小女朋友
Are you saying this is a chick car? Because it isn't. It's a Porsche.
你是说这是辆小妞车? 事实上它不是的.这是辆波夏
Yeah. The cute little one.
对 可爱版的小波夏
No, no, no. It's the sporty one.
不 这是运动型跑车
If your sport is girls' basketball.
如果想象女生打篮球那样运动
No, no, it's got the fuel injection, and the rack and the pinion...
不 它有燃料喷射系统 还有行李架和齿轮
...and the leather thingy to cover the hood.
还有这个皮做的引擎盖
That's called a bra, Alan.
那叫胸罩 艾伦
Yeah, but it's made of leather.
是啊 但是那是皮制的
All right. Whatever. It is not a chick car.
好吧 随你 这不是小妞车!
The salesman showed me brochures with pictures of guys driving it.
推销员给我看过他们的小册子 上面有男士开车的图片
Alan, if a monkey walked into the dealership...
艾伦 如果猴子想买♥♥车的话
...he'd have been shown pictures of monkeys driving it.
他就会给它看猴子开车的图片
Monkeys can't drive a stick.
猴子不会用操纵杆
Now, come on. We'll go for a spin, pick up Jake.
来吧 我们去兜风 去接杰克
Where'd you get the money for this?
你哪里来的钱买♥♥车?
Where'd you get it...
你哪来的钱买♥♥车?
...because they're not cheap. No, no, they are not.
这可不便宜 确实价格不菲
Where'd you get the money for this?
那你哪里的钱?
The money. Where'd you get it?
钱? 哪弄来的?
Oh, I got it from...
我从#￥%%&来的
What? I got a loan from...
什么? 我向￥%&@贷款来的
Alan, where'd the money come from?
艾伦 钱哪来的?
I found it.
捡到的
Alan? Mom.
艾伦 妈妈给的
You traded your soul for a Porsche.
你居然为了一辆保时捷出♥卖♥♥♥了灵魂
I didn't trade my soul, and it's "Porsche."
我并没有出♥卖♥♥♥灵魂 另外这叫波夏
Alan, why didn't you come to me?
艾伦 你怎么不找我?
No, I already owe you so much.
我已经欠了你那么多了...
You won't let me pay rent and you pay all the utilities.
你又不让我交房♥租 而且这所有东西都是你买♥♥的
Keeping that in mind, did you ever consider...
我心领了 你就没想过
...taking the money from Mom and paying me back?
从妈妈那拿钱还给我吗?
No, not really.
不 真没想过
Come on. Let me show you what this baby can do.
来吧 让我秀下这宝贝性能如何
Well, what do you know? Monkeys can drive a stick.
你还别说 猴子是会用操纵杆的
You know, the salesman was right.
知道吗 销♥售♥员说得对
You really do feel special in one of these things.
你在这东东里面确实感觉不一样
Oh, yeah. Probably not a lot of middle-aged, divorced guys...
是啊 开着保时捷在洛杉矶
...driving around L.A. in a Porsche.
到处跑的中年离婚男子真不多了
"Porsche."
波夏
Oh, wait, I forgot to show you the best part.
等下 给你见识下最棒的部分
Alan, that's a NASCAR hat.
艾伦 那是NASCAR(全国汽车比赛协会)的帽子
Yeah, they were out of the Porsche hats.
是啊 他们的保时捷帽子用完了
I wanted something that said speed and performance, so I got this.
我想要点看起来有速度有激♥情♥的帽子，他们就给了我这个
What you should be wearing is a hat with a propeller on top.
你干脆戴个有飞机螺旋桨的帽子得了
Come on, open her up.
拜托 开快点
The first 1000 miles is the break-in period.
最开始的1000英里是最容易出事故的
You're not supposed to go over 65.
最好不要超过65英里每小时
Well, then go 65.
那就开到65
The speed limit is 60. You want me to get a ticket?
限速是60 你想要我吃罚单吗?
Alan, you're driving an expensive red sports car.
艾伦 你开的是辆昂贵的大红跑车
If you're not getting tickets and tail, you might as well take the bus.
不想吃罚单你干脆赶公车算了，
Which, by the way, just passed us.
随便说下有辆公车刚超过去了
I am going plenty fast, thank you very much.
我已经开的很快了 谢谢
Can we at least put the top down?
至少把顶棚打开嘛
No, I wanna trap the new-car smell in as long as I can.
不 我想尽可能长时间的 保留新车的味道
Man, are you anal-retentive.
艾伦 你真是够龟毛的
You need a bumper sticker that reads, "My other car is a puckered rectum."
你干脆贴张防撞贴纸 上面写着 "我另外一辆车是堆破烂"
Oh, yeah. Like I'd desecrate this car with a bumper sticker.
是嘛 好像我想拿防撞贴纸装饰车似的
God, I love that sound.
天哪 我爱死那声音了
Will you stop it?
你给我停下来!
Jake, your dad's here. Where's your car?
杰克 你老爸来了.你车呢?
Oh, my car? My car is...
我的车? 我的车在...
...right there.
那
You got a Porsche? "Porsche."
你买♥♥了架保时捷? 波夏
I have to struggle to make ends meet, and you can buy a Porsche?
我千辛万苦维持收支平衡 你却去买♥♥保时捷?
What are you talking about? Your ends have not only met...
你说什么呢 你的收支早平衡了
...they've been to Hawaii and remodeled the kitchen.
你去了夏威夷度假还重新装♥修♥了厨房♥
Don't change the subject. How can you afford a fancy car?
不要转移话题 你怎么买♥♥得起时髦跑车?
Well, I can't afford it, really.
我其实买♥♥得起 真的
Maybe I have to call my attorney.
也许我应该请我的律师来
And re-examine our whole alimony/child-support agreement.
重新评估一下孩子津贴费的问题
No, no, you don't.
不 不要
It wasn't very expensive.
那也不是很贵
This is the girl version. Right, Charlie?
这是女士版 对吧 查理
Oh, yeah, yeah. You've gotta kiss it before you can even stick the key in.
是啊 你得亲她一下钥匙才能插♥进♥去
Judith, you have nothing to worry about. You've successfully sucked me dry.
你没什么好担心的 你早就成功把我榨干了
Absolutely. This guy's farting dust.
没错 这家伙已经穷得只剩屁了
Then where'd he get the money for the car?
你哪来的钱买♥♥车?
He borrowed it from our mother.
他找我们妈借的
Give me a break. Even Alan's not that stupid.
得了吧 查理 艾伦还不至于那么蠢
Oh, but he is.
但他真的是
I am. I swear to God.
我真的很蠢 我对天发誓
Hey, cool car. Is it yours? Yeah.
好酷的车 你的吗? 是啊
We're gonna have to talk about my allowance.
我们得谈谈我零花钱的问题了
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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