好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S02E12
Part 2
Nov. 17, 2020, 12:08 p.m.
Oh, Alan's always been a gentleman.
艾伦总是很绅士
I remember one time we were kids. We were in my bedroom playing Stratego...
我还记得当我们还小的时候 在房♥间里一起玩飞行棋...
and my blouse came unbuttoned, and Alan, instead of sneaking a peek
我的胸罩扣子掉了 可艾伦不象绝大多数男孩一样偷看
...like a lot of guys would do, averted his eyes and said, "Jamie, bosom."
...而是蒙住眼睛说姬米 你的奶♥子♥
Really. Is that true, Alan?
是真的吗 艾伦?
Pretty much. We were playing Boggle, not Stratego.
差不多了 但那时我们玩的是跳棋 而不是飞行棋
Well, there you go. A gentleman. A better man than I.
那这就对了 一个比我更绅士更好的男人
Oh, don't put yourself down,
你也不必如此妄自菲薄吧
Charlie. You seem like a wonderful man to me.
查理 对我来说你是个很棒的男人
Yeah, but you heard him. I'm better.
是的但你刚听他说了 我更好
Excuse me.
对不起
I'll be right back. I think he wants to talk.
我很快就回来 我觉得他想和我谈谈
You know, you are such a good brother.
你真是个好哥哥
You have no idea.
谁说不是呢
"Bosom"?
奶♥子♥
Forget that. What the hell are you doing?
别提那了 你究竟在干什么?
What? I'm trying to make you look good. Turns out it's not that easy.
怎么了? 我正试图帮你说好话呢 虽然看来很不容易
You look like you're trying to make me look good...
不 看起来你好象在说我很出色
...but you're making you look good.
但其实是在说你自己如何出色
I don't know how, but that's the net result.
我不知道你怎么做的但结果就是这样
Alan, you're being ridiculous. Am I? I think not.
艾伦这太荒唐了 是吗? 我不这么认为
From the minute we walked in, you've been sabotaging me.
从进餐厅的那刻起你就在算计我了
How? How? Look at where I'm sitting.
怎么算计? 看看我们俩坐的位置
What? You wanted to sit next to her. Yeah, and you let me.
什么? 是你要做在她身旁的 是你故意让我坐的
And now you get to stare into her eyes, and I get to stare into her ear.
现在你就可以看着她的双眼 而我只能看她的耳朵
What do you want from me? Wanna change seats?
你究竟要我怎么样? 你想换座位?
Sure. That won't look suspicious.
当然 那很可疑的
I'm just trying to help, Alan. Well, how about that? I do have to pee.
我只是想帮你 艾伦 但我确实也想要尿尿了
You wanna help me? Stop talking me up.
你是想要帮我? 那就别在帮我说好话了
It's killing me. Okay.
让我比死还难受 好的
Stop putting yourself down. That's killing me too.
别在把你自己说的很差 这也让我比死还难受
Got it. Just sit there and eat your dinner...
了解 就坐在那里吃你的晚餐...
...and I'll play your game.
...我来做你那套
Fine.
了解
You wanna shake on it?
你是否想就此问题握下手?
You're disgusting.
你太恶心了
Yeah, I'm disgusting.
是的 我很恶心
At least I'm not the one taking a squirt on my shoe.
但至少我不会弄在我鞋子上
Let me tell you something about my brother.
让我来和你说说我哥哥吧
He puts himself down, but he is truly a wonderful man.
他虽然把他自己说的很差 但他真的是个很不错的人
I mean, here's a guy, single, good-Iooking, talented...
我的意思是 他是一个单身的 帅气又有天赋的
Well, l... You're too modest.
行了 你太谦虚了
Talented, a ton of money.
有天赋的 很多钱
And what does he do when his brother and nephew need a place to live?
他让他的弟弟和侄子 有了容身之处
Does he complain about us cramping his style? No.
那他有没有怨言呢 没有
He opens up his home, and his heart.
他收留了我们向我们敞开了他的心
And frankly, I don't know which one is bigger.
很坦率的说我不知道哪个更大
You are an incredible human being.
你真是个难以置信的人
Can we get the damn check, please?
我们能结♥帐♥走人了吗
Wait till you meet Jake. He's a great kid.
你该见见杰克 他是个好孩子
You're gonna love him. Right, Charlie?
你会喜欢上他的 对吗 查理
Don't oversell him, Alan. He mostly sits around and eats.
不确定 他只会坐着要么吃着
What do you guys like to do together?
所以你们在一起都干些什么
Oh, we do all kinds of father-son things.
做一些父亲和孩子之间做的事情
We go to the movies... Where he sits and eats.
我们一起看电影 都是他想看的
And we also build models...
或者玩玩模型
You know, airplanes, and fly them off the deck.
就是那种模型飞机
That sounds like fun. Oh, it is. Jake loves it.
听起来很好玩 哦 是的 杰克很喜欢
I mean, he is a great kid.
他是很不错的孩子
I can't wait to meet him.
我都等不及见他了
How about tomorrow afternoon?
那明天下午怎么样
Tomorrow sounds great. Good, good. It's a date.
明天不错 好好 那就这么定了
So don't be late. Or we'll have to wait.
大家都不能迟到 我们都不等人的
Oh, okay. Here we are.
好了 我们到了
Thank you so much. I had a wonderful time.
谢谢你 我过的很开心
I'll see you tomorrow. Good night.
明天见 晚安
Good night, Charlie.
晚安 查理
Good night.
晚安
To the Batcave, Alfred.
真为你的女朋友自豪
Go to hell.
去死吧
I was just sitting here. I didn't put her tongue in my mouth.
拜托 我只是坐在这儿什么都没做 是她把舌头放我嘴里的
You got tongue?
你们舌吻了?
Actually, looking back, it was probably mine.
其实好像那是我自己的舌头
Oh, relax. I'm just screwing with you.
放松点 我只是跟你开开玩笑
Besides, you're the one who got the date.
再说你才是跟她约会的对象
You had to pimp your kid out to do it, but you got there.
不过得看你的儿子 把你刚才吹的那些本事玩的怎么样了
Hey, hey, there is nothing wrong with bragging on my son.
吹吹自己儿子可没什么错
He's a reflection of me, and if that compensates...
他就是我的一个缩影 如果那能弥补...
...for some of my social clumsiness...
...我的社交技巧上的不足...
And maybe rustles up a little tail.
或许让你神气一下
I am not pimping him out.
我没在挑他的错
Don't bark at me. I'm proud of you.
别冲我吠啊 我为你而自豪了
Thank you. And make yourself scarce tomorrow.
谢谢你 你让我对明天没信心了
I don't need any more of your help. Fine. You're on your own.
我再也不用你帮忙了 好吧 你自己来
Now, hush up and drive Miss Daisy home.
那么现在我们去???购物吧
Okay, Sky Captain. Ready to go?
好了 天空上尉 准备起飞了吗？
I guess.
是的
See how he loves this?
瞧他多喜欢这个
Pilot to copilot. Contact.
该起飞了 伙计 开动
What?
什么玩意?
Contact. Why are you talking like that?
开动 你干嘛那么怪声怪气的说
Just... Just start the engine.
就开动引擎吧
Here we go. Ready for liftoff?
哇哦 开动了 准备起飞了吗
It's not a rocket ship, Dad.
起飞时不需要你摇来摇去的 老爸
I know that, Jake.
这我知道 杰克
Hey, it actually works.
嘿 还真能飞起来
Bring it up. Bring it up.
拉 拉起来
Okay. Come on, Jake, up, up. It's...
好的 拜托 杰克 是往上 往上拉
Don't yell. Give me that.
别冲我嚷 把摇控器给我
No, I'm doing it. Well, then do it.
不行 我正在操纵了 那就好好操纵
I am.
当然
Is that it?
这就完了?
No, go get it, and we'll patch her back up, like we always do.
去捡回来把它重新粘贴起来 就像我们以前那样
Can we just order a pizza and watch TV?
我们能不能叫份披萨看看电视就行了
Go get the plane.
去捡那飞机
This sucks.
真差劲
"This sucks." Isn't he a hoot?
真差劲 是不是鬼机灵?
He's great.
他棒极了
So...
那么
...here we are.
...就我们俩了
Yep.
是啊
I just cannot get over how much you've changed.
我还是不敢相信你变化这么大
You like? Yeah, me like. I mean... I mean, I like.
你喜欢吗 嗯 俺喜欢 我是说 我喜欢
So...
那么
...where's Charlie?
...查理在哪儿
This is all I could find.
我就找到这些
Guess who that is. No way.
那个就是 不是吧
Way. What was going on with your hair?
就是 你那头发怎么回事
It's called a Jeri curl.
这被称为杰瑞卷发
It was my Michael Jackson period.
这是我的偶像迈克·杰克森的发型
Who's the tall guy next to you?
你旁边的那高个男人是谁
Oh, that's me, Jake.
那是我 杰克
Oh, sorry.
哦 很抱歉
Well, at least you look like a girl now.
起码你现在看起来像女孩了
Thank you.
谢谢
Was Dad your boyfriend?
我老爸那时是你男友吗
Oh, no, no. Jamie and I were just friends.
不 不是的 杰米和我那时只是朋友
Yeah, we were never that way.
是啊 我们没有恋人的那种感觉
Are you that way now?
那你们现在有吗
Why don't you go watch TV? Finally.
你去看电视好吗 终于
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
剧集 | 好汉两个半（2003） | 导航列表