神兽

The Unicorn S01E11

Part 1 Feb. 29, 2020, 10:40 a.m.

我只是想告诉你
I just wanted to tell you
安娜会去本和米歇尔的聚会
that Anna is coming to Ben and Michelle's party.
对了我是安娜
I'm Anna, by the way.
-你是迪莉娅的朋友安娜 -你是迪莉娅的朋友韦德
- You're Delia's Anna? - And you're Delia's Wade.
今晚是我度过的最美妙的夜晚
This was the most amazing night ever.
我也这么想
I thought so, too.
你好
Hello.
-可能会有些奇怪 -是超级奇怪
- It's gonna be a little weird. - It's super weird.
很抱歉那天让格蕾丝
I'm really sorry about what happened
撞见我们的事
the other day with Grace.
我没想过让你们以这种方式相见
That's not how I wanted you two to meet.
她还好吗
Is she okay?
还好
Yeah, she's fine.
几个月前我抓到过她和男朋友亲热
I caught her making out with this boy a few months back,
这下算扯平了
so we're even.
-你们一家子都够放荡不羁的 -相当不羁
- I run with a fast crowd. - A very fast crowd.
抱歉
Sorry.
薄荷糖我能来个橘子味的吗
Life Savers. Can I have an orange one?
这样吧
You know what?
-这一包都给你我得回去了 -好的
- Take the roll. I got to get back. - All right.
还得帮病人挤脓包
Those pustules won't pop themselves.
我又想了想还是还给你吧
You know, second thought, you take those.
-好吧 -行
- All right. - ?Okay.
-我看你俩进展不错嘛 -是的但是很煎熬
- Things are going well, I see? - ?Yes, but it's tough.
我想多陪陪她
You know, I'd like to see her more,
但是自从上次姑娘们的事情后
but I've-I've really had to put on the brakes
我必须得控制自己了
after what happened with the girls.
听我说
Okay, you listen to me.
她是你的完美伴侣你千万不能搞砸了
She is damn near perfect for you, and you cannot blow this.
我想你根本不知道我为这段感情
I don't think you know how much I have invested
投入了多少心血
in this relationship.
我知道迪莉娅真对不起
I know, Delia, and-and I'm sorry.
-好的 -等会
- Okay. - ?Wait.
为什么我要向你道歉
Why am I apologizing to you?
神兽第一季第十一集
韦德你的车♥库♥里什么情况
Uh, Wade, what's going on with your garage?
-一团糟 -也还好
- It's a mess. - Well, it's not that bad.
很乱
Oh, it's bad.
我都走不到冰箱边上
I could hardly make it to the fridge.
你没看过《囤积狂》吗你可以上那个节目了
Haven't you seen Hoarders? You could be on it.
真人秀拍摄有囤积障碍强迫症的人
好吧我我有时间就整理
Uh, well, I'll, uh, I'll get to it when I have some time.
择日不如撞日
No time like the present.
韦德她是想让你组织一次旧货出♥售♥
Wade, she's trying to get you to have a yard sale
这样她也能在你这卖♥♥点旧货
so she can sell our stuff there, too.
那为什么你不在自己院子里卖♥♥呢
Well, why don't you just have a yard sale at your house?
我们不行
'Cause we can't.
邻居已经抱怨过她举♥行♥了太多次旧货出♥售♥
The neighbors complained about how many yard sales she has.
邻里之间软件上全是投诉她的留言
There's a whole thread about it on that neighborhood app.
那软件上都是些种族歧视的人
That neighborhood app is a bunch of racists.
或许你说得对但是他们也帮忙找走丢的猫
Okay, that may be true, but they also help find lost cats.
我自己拿一瓶去
I'll go get my own beer.
所以你想在我家举♥行♥一次旧货出♥售♥对吗
So you're just asking to have a yard sale at my house?
周六早上八点开始怎么样
How does Saturday 8:00 A.M. sound?
-太早了 -相信我
- Really early. - ?Trust me,
-能赚大钱的 -那可太棒了
- it's a great way to make money. - Oh, that's good,
这样你就能带你那恶心的医生女友出去约会了
so you can take out your gross doctor girlfriend.
别这样娜塔莉你根本都没见过她
Come on, Natalie. I mean, you haven't even met her yet.
我用不着见她她是双子座的
I don't need to meet her. She's a Gemini.
没有啤酒了吗
That was the last beer?
干杯
Cheers.
爸爸这些是我想卖♥♥的东西
Dad, here's the stuff I want to sell.
反正我也不玩这些了
I don't play with them anyway.
当然你不玩了这些都是你弟弟的
Of course you don't play with them, they're your brother's.
这个就不是
This isn't.
儿子放回去
Boy, put that stuff back.
等一下
Hold on.
你拿这些干什么
What are these doing here?
我知道这些是你宝贵的黑胶唱片
I know, I know, it's your precious vinyl,
但我挑的都是重复的
but these are duplicates.
詹姆斯·布朗的圣诞特辑
You have three copies of James Brown's
你有三张一样的
Merry Christmas Album.
但这是十一首乡村爵士风圣诞歌♥曲的合集
But it's got 11 funky Christmas hits.
既然能在线听歌♥ 为什么还留着这些
Why keep any of this when you can just stream it?
因为在线听歌♥是冷酷且没有灵魂的
Because streaming music is cold and soulless.
我给客户装系统的时候
It's like I tell all my clients
就是这么跟他们说的
when I'm putting in their systems,
黑胶是有形的声音是温暖的存在着的
vinyl is tactile, the sound is warm and present.
用其他媒介欣赏狄葛博星系乐队的作品
And listening to Digable Planets on anything else...
都应该是违法的
should be illegal.
詹姆斯·布朗的专辑不能卖♥♥
And James Brown is staying.
下个圣诞节要走乡村爵士风
Next Christmas is gonna be funky.
小娜下来来看看这个
Hey, Nat. Come down here, check this out.
我买♥♥了个新游戏你还记得我之前
I got a new game. You know how I never let you
-不让你玩《恐怖袭击》吗 -记得
- play Aggravated Assault? - Yeah.
不过我觉得你现在已经不是个小孩了
Well, uh, I realize that-that you're not a kid anymore,
所以咱们一起玩一下
and I thought maybe we could play and, uh,
然后聊聊你知道吗
and just kind of talk about things, you know?
因为
Because, lately,
我们都没机会好好聊聊
we haven't really had a chance to discuss
最近发生的一些事情还有就是
everything that's been going on and, you know,
心里是怎么想的还有一些情绪啥的
what's going on in our hearts and how we feel and--
我的天我着火了
Oh, my God, I'm on fire.
你是怎么做到的
H-How did you do that?
挺有意思的老爸还是讨厌安娜拜
That was fun, Dad. Still hate Anna. Bye.
我已经试着站在娜塔莉的角度上跟她谈了
I mean, I tried to talk to Natalie on her level,
但是她很快就看穿我了
but she saw through me pretty quick.
然后竖起心墙
She's just putting up a wall.
那是因为她能看出来你喜欢安娜
Well, yeah, 'cause she can see that you like Anna.
-迪莉娅 -怎么了
- Delia. - Yeah?
我找了半天能在庭院拍卖♥♥上买♥♥的东西
I've been looking everywhere for something to sell at this yard sale;
结果只找到这副眼镜
all I can find are these old glasses.
那你就把这眼镜买♥♥了呗
Okay, well, maybe you can sell those.
昂也许吧
Yeah. I mean, I guess I could.
右眼远视250度左眼近视175度
They're right eye -250, left eye +175.
总有人能戴着合适的对吧
I mean, that's got to fit somebody, right?
对对
Yeah, yeah.
话说回来如果不把安娜介绍给女孩们
Anyway, this... nothing's gonna get better
事情就应该不会有什么进展吧
until I can introduce Anna to the girls.
也许你可以等等知道不
You know, maybe you should wait a little bit, you know,
等到你懂得
until, you know, after...
你意思是上♥床♥吗
Is that supposed to be sex?
-你们上这的是啥床 -闭嘴
- What-what kind of sex are you having? - Don't answer that.
听着我想这样
Look, here's what I want to do:
我想让他们在一个中立的地方见面
I-I-I want them to meet on neutral ground.
-在这吧 -真的吗
- Let's do it here. - Really?
我们可以搞一个欢迎安娜加入的晚宴
Yeah. We'll do, like, a whole dinner party for Anna.
真是太谢谢你了迪莉娅
Oh, Delia, thank you so much.
那真的是太好了
Oh, that would be, that would be so great.
我就是想搞点随意简单又有趣的
I-I just want something really casual and-and easy and-and fun.
是的肯定超有趣超随意
Yeah. Oh, yeah, so fun, so casual.
随意简单有趣不就是我们迪莉娅吗
Casual, easy, and fun. That's Delia.
你周五晚上有空一起吃饭吗
Hey, are you free for dinner on Friday night?
有空而且我特别想
I am, and I would love
和你好好约会一次就我们俩
to go on a real date, just the two of us.
天哪我也是
Oh, man, me, too. Yeah.
不过这次不是
That's not what this is.
这次类似于一个尴尬的见面会
Oh. It's more of an awkward staged meeting
让你和我的女儿们见见
between you and two girls
她们可是下定了决心要讨厌你
who are determined to hate you.
你可真会宣传
You are a hell of a salesman.