生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S03E09
Part 3
Oct. 4, 2019, 1:43 p.m.
There are several toxic chemicals
有那么几种有毒化学物
that'd be untraceable in an autopsy.
尸检是查不出来的
Okay, uh, that's the spirit,
你抓到了要领
but, um, let's dial it back
但手段可以温柔点
to a non-lethal form of vengeance.
不要置人于死地
How about we whoopee cushion on his office chair?
这样 在他的办公室椅子上弄个放屁垫
He'll sit down, it'll sound like
他一坐下 听起来就像是有胃气胀
he's flatulent, even though he's not.
尽管他不是真有胃气胀
Let's keep thinking.
还是再想想吧
Oh, gee, you're too late.
老兄 你可来晚了
Scarlett Johansson and Wonder Woman were just in here
斯嘉丽·乔纳森和神奇女侠
trolling around for neurotic, little weasels.
刚在这里轮番歌♥颂神经质和胆小鬼呢
I came to talk to Bernadette. She's working today, right?
我来找伯纳黛特 她今天上班吗
Yes, but I don't think she wants to see you.
是啊 但我觉得她不想见你
Why not?
为啥
Come on, Howard. You hurt her feelings
得了 霍华德 你伤害了她
by not calling her all week.
一个星期都不给人家电♥话♥
Plus, I've kind of been talkin' some smack about ya.
加上我还说了你不少坏话
Hello, Howard.
好啊 霍华德
Wait, Bernadette, I need to talk to you.
等下 伯纳黛特 我有话对你说
I can't now, I'm working.
现在不成 我在工作呢
This will only take a second.
就一会儿
You asked me to think about where
你之前让我好好考虑
our relationship was going, and I did.
我们之间的关系 好吧我想过了
Bernadette?
伯纳黛特
Will you marry me?
你愿意嫁给我吗
Is this more comedy that I don't understand?
我不明白 这算是玩笑吗
No. I'm serious.
不 我是认真的
I'm never going to find another girl like you
你是我生命中的唯一
who likes me and is, you know, real.
重要的是 你是真心喜欢我
So, this isn't a joke?
这不是开玩笑吗
- No. - Then you're insane.
-不是 -那你铁定疯了
I prefer to think of myself as quirky.
我觉得自己这是突施奇招
Howard, we've only been on three dates.
霍华德 我们只约会了三次
We haven't even had sex yet.
甚至还没上过床
Fair enough.
你说得对
When's your break?
你什么时候下班
Don't you just hate when this happens?
好事将成 你们嫉妒我了不是
All right, how's this for revenge?
好了 用这个来复仇如何
A solution of hydrogen peroxide,
一剂过氧化氢[双氧水]
and one of saturated potassium iodide.
加上一剂饱和碘化钾
What's this?
这又是什么
Mountain Dew.
山露汽水[碳酸饮料]
Ahh, refreshing.
啊 真是提神醒脑
We're going to combine these chemicals with ordinary dish soap,
然后将这两样化学制剂 与普通洗碗剂结合
creating a little exothermic release of oxygen.
就会放热 释放出氧
Foamy vengeance.
泡沫复仇记
Yes, exactly.
完全正确
This is brilliant, Sheldon.
谢尔顿 这招实在是高
How are we going to deploy it in Kripke's office?
但你怎么布置到克瑞普克的办公室
Already taken care of.
早就布置好了
Observe.
注意看
This is a live shot of Kripke's lab via a mini webcam
通过迷你摄像头拍摄到的克瑞普克实验室实况
I was able to install, thanks to a dollar bill
拜我偷塞到看门人衬衫口袋里的美钞所赐
discreetly placed in the night janitor's shirt pocket.
我才能装了这个迷你摄像头
At the same time,
与此同时
I also secured large quantities of these chemicals
还将大量这样的化学制剂
above the tiles in the drop ceiling.
放到了他的天花板顶上
Oh, Sheldon,
哦 谢尔顿
you remind me of a young Lex Luthor.
你让我想起年轻时的莱克斯·卢瑟[后成为超人的死敌]
You flatter me, sir.
您太过奖了 先生
- Let me guess: motion sensors? - Yes.
-我猜猜 带运动感应器的 -是的
The reaction will be triggered
一旦克瑞普克走到屋子中间
when Kripke reaches the center of the room.
感应器就会触发
Mwah, ha, ha.
木哈哈
I gotta say, I am really impressed.
我不得不承认 我很佩服你
This is truly the Sheldon Cooper way to get even.
这绝对是谢尔顿式的复仇方式
It may be low-tech,
这招或许技术含量不高
but I still maintain the whoopee cushion has comic validity.
但我还是坚持认为 放屁坐垫自有其喜剧效应
Here comes Kripke!
克瑞普克来了
Who is that with him?
跟他一起的是谁
I believe that's the president of the university.
我想那是我们大学的校长
And the board of directors.Abort! Abort!
还有理事会成员 快中止 中止
There is no "abort."
没有中止程序
How could you not put in an "abort?"
你怎么能不设中止程序
I made a boo-boo, all right?
我疏忽了 好了吧
I think the board will really appreciate
塞伯特校长 相信理事会将很欣慰地看到
how well we're using that NSA grant, President Seibert.
我们将国安局的拨款运用得如此之好
Right here we have a micro-controlled plasma...
这里是我们的微电脑控制的等离子...
Wow. Looks like the Ganges on laundry day.
看上去就像洗衣日那天的恒河
At least they don't know it was you.
至少他们不知道是你干的
Hello, Kripke.
你好 克瑞普克
This classic prank comes to you
你此刻遭遇的经典恶作剧
from the malevolent mind of Sheldon Cooper.
来自恶意复仇的谢尔顿·库珀
If you'd like to see the look on your stupid face,
如果你想看看自己那张蠢蛋脸
this video is being instantly uploaded to YouTube.
这段视频即刻就会上传到YouTube
Oh, and a hat tip to Leonard Hofstadter and Raj Koothrappali
并感谢莱纳德·霍夫斯塔德和拉杰·库萨帕里
for their support and encouragement in this enterprise.
感谢他们在复仇大业中对我的支持与鼓励
Well, I'm going back to India.What's your plan?
我计划逃回印度去 你呢
Hey, here's your tip from table seven.
给 7号♥桌给的小费
Oh, thanks.
谢谢
Testing. Check.Check two.
麦克风测试 再次测试
Oh, now what?
这回又怎么了
You want me to throw him out?
想让我扔他出去吗
No, that's okay.
不用 没事的
Are you sure? He's small.
你确定 他个子那么小
I bet I can get a nice, tight spiral on him.
我打赌我肯定能给他来个漂亮的背摔
I want to dedicate this number
这一曲 我想献给
to a great gal who I've done wrong.
一位被我伤害了的好姑娘
Bernadette
伯纳黛特[曲调来自The Four Tops乐队的《Bernadette》]
* I am so sorry for
我感到非常抱歉
* Trying to propose to you
因我向你求婚之事
* Bernadette
伯纳黛特
* You found it creepy
你觉得我行事疯狂
* But that's just the kind of thing I do *
但那就是我的风格
* I know now it was too soon to talk of love *
我知道现在说爱还太早
* It was just a crazy idea that came to me in my tub *
那只是我泡澡时突发的奇想
* But, Bernadette, give me one more chance *
但伯纳黛特 请再给我一次机会
* Sweet Bernadette
亲爱的伯纳黛特
* I'll get the hang of this thing *
我保证很快找到窍门
* They call romance, Sweet Bernadette *
找到浪漫的窍门 亲爱的伯纳黛特
* I dream to once again
我梦想着能够再一次
* Kiss your lips, Sweet Bernadette *
吻上你的双唇 亲爱的伯纳黛特
* Sincerely yours
您的裙下之臣
* Howard Wolowitz
霍华德·沃罗威茨
* Bernadette...
伯纳黛特
- Oh, I am so sorry. - Are you kidding?
-实在听不下去了 -你开什么玩笑
That's the most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me.
那是别人为我所做的 最浪漫的事
* Bernadette! Thank you, Cheesecake Factory!
伯纳黛特 谢谢芝士蛋糕工厂
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