迈克和茉莉（2010）

Mike & Molly S01E19

Part 2 Dec. 15, 2020, 2:38 p.m.

He's a widower, which means
他老婆死了意味着
he hangs in there until they tag and bag you.
他一直饥渴的等在那直到有人日了就走不留一句话
You gotta admire that.
你得钦佩这行为
I think this is great.
我觉得这很好啊
I mean, it's flattering when someone is attracted to you.
被喜欢是件很让人高兴的事儿
Don't drag it through the gutter.
别想歪了
I told him we're taking separate cars...
我告诉他我们俩单独开车去
...in case he imagines throwing
万一他想象着
a few shrimp at me entitles him to a free mount.
向我扔些大虾反正是自助餐
A girl can't be too careful. Yup.
女人再小心也不过是啊
That's why I sleep with a gun under my pillow.
这就是我为什么睡觉时要在枕头下面藏只枪
Just throw that into conversation and you should be just fine.
和他聊聊枪的事然后你就尽管放心吧
Anyway, do you think Mike would be okay with this?
话说回来你觉得Mike会接受这事吗
I think he'd be thrilled. Why?
我觉得他会相当激动你为什么这么说
He's never seen me with another man besides his father...
他从没见过我和除了他老爹之外的任何男人在一块儿
...and I don't wanna confuse the boy.
我不想让他困惑
He's pretty grown up and I know he just wants you to be happy.
他已经这么大了你开心他就好
Let's just keep it on the sly until we see how it goes.
看看后续怎么样吧先保密
I don't want him getting attached to this man...
我可不想他对这男人形成依恋
...going to ball games and whatnot...
一起去玩球什么的
...then I'm the bad guy if I have to kick him to the curb.
到时候分手我就是坏人了
I won't say anything to
我不会对Mike说一个字的
Mike and you tell him when you're comfortable.
你觉得时机到了你告诉他
He's gonna wonder why I asked to have lunch with you.
他会好奇为什么我和你一起吃午饭
I'll just tell him that you wanted to get to know me...
那我就告诉他你想要了解我
...because you thought it was
因为你觉得这很重要
important that his two best gals become friends.
他生命中最重要的两个女人成为朋友
No, he'd never believe that.
不他绝不会相信这个
Tell him I came to you to learn to read.
告诉他我来学习怎样阅读
It's my secret shame.
这是我隐藏的耻辱
Well, hopefully he won't ask.
好吧希望他别问
Hey. Hey, sweetie, let me help you.
嗨嗨宝贝我来帮你
Oh, thanks. What smells so good?
噢谢谢你什么东西闻起来这么香
That would be my world-famous five-alarm chili.
我的世界闻名的五星级辣椒酱
You cooked?
你做饭了
Well, you cook for me all the time.
是啊一直都是你为我做饭
It seems only right that I should cook for you.
只有我为你做饭看起来才对
And I haven't always done the right thing in my life,
生命中我一直没怎么做正确的事
but people change.
但是人会变
Yes, they do.
是的他们会
I'm not the same guy I was when I met you.
我已经不再是当初你遇到的那个男人了
And I'm certainly not the
而且当然也不是
same guy I was between the ages of 12 and 14.
十二三岁的男孩
Huh.
啊
So chili, you say?
你刚刚说辣椒酱
Yup. My special recipe, and the secret ingredient is corn.
是我的特制秘方秘密原料是玉米
Can I get you a nice,
给你倒杯低度好啤酒
light beer or perhaps a chilled glass of chardonnay?
或者冰镇的夏敦埃酒
Oh, I'd love a glass of wine.
噢我想喝杯酒
Coming up.
马上来
So how was your day?
今天过得怎么样
Pretty good.
很不错
Classes were fine and I had my lunch with your mom.
课上得不错还和你妈妈吃了午饭
Oh, was that today?
噢今天吗
I forgot all about it.
我完全忘了
So, what did she chew your ear off about?
她和你唠叨了些什么
Nothing much.
没什么啦
She just needed a sounding
她只是需要一个好的聆听者
board about something, it's really no big deal.
和一些建议真的没什么
Oh, good. So no health issues or anything, right?
那很好不是关于健康状况的对吧
She didn't find a lump on something?
她没在哪儿发现一个肿块吧
Oh, no, no.
噢不没有
Nothing other than you on her couch.
除了她沙发上的你
That's funny.
真有趣
So I didn't come up in the conversation at all?
所以你们从头到尾都没谈到我了
Her only son, that seems weird to me.
她唯一的儿子这有点奇怪了
Okay, she might've mentioned you once or twice.
好吧她大概提了一次还是两次
I don't know what Mom told you.
我不知道我妈跟你说了些什么
I'm not the reason the nurse transferred.
可护士被调走不关我的事
The janitor knocked her up.
是看门人把她肚子搞大了
What are you rambling on about?
你在说些什么
I don't know. Maybe I should stop talking.
我不知道或者我不该讲话了
Your mom just wanted my advice on something. It's not a big deal.
你妈妈只是想向我寻求建议没什么大不了的
If it's not, why can't you tell me?
如果没什么为什么你不能告诉我
Because she asked me not to.
因为她让我别
So it had nothing to do with a
所以不是一个年轻男孩
young boy's innocent infatuation with hernia exams?
对疝气检查的迷恋了
No.
是的
What?
你刚说什么了
I will tell you, but you have to
我告诉你但你要保证
promise you're not gonna say anything to your mom.
对你妈妈守口如瓶
I promise. Seriously, she has put her trust in me...
我保证说真的她相信了我
...and I don't wanna compromise it.
我不想毁了她的信任
I'll keep my mouth shut. Just tell me.
我会守口如瓶的你说吧
She's going out on a date.
她要出去约会了
Oh, come on.
别胡扯了
If you're gonna lie, pick something that's plausible.
如果你要撒谎找点可信的吧
I'm adopted. She's really a man. Something I could buy.
我是被收养的她实际上是个男人说点我能信的吧
There is a gentleman at
教堂有位先生
church that asked her out and she said yes.
约她出去她答应了
And she wanted my advice
她想问问我的建议
and to help her get ready tomorrow night.
来帮她明晚做好准备
Wait. My mom's going out on a date?
等等我妈妈要出去约会了吗
She is. But you can't let on that you know.
是的但是你不能让她发现你已经知道了
Okay, and I appreciate you telling me.
好的我很感激你告诉我
Sure.
当然
What is the deal with the school nurse?
学校护士是怎么回事
Oh, nothing, I tricked her
噢没什么我使了点小伎俩
into touching my genitals. Is this too spicy?
让她摸我老二这会太辣吗
I got yelled at, at work today.
今天上班我被吼了
Who yelled at you? You put makeup on corpses.
是谁你可是给死人上妆
I was working on an 80-year-old cadaver...
我正在给一80岁的尸体化妆
...and her grandson got his panties in a bunch...
她孙子瞬间就鸡动了
...because I put body glitter in her cleavage.
因为我在她乳♥沟♥上抹了闪粉
I'm like, "Dude, chill.
我想说的是伙计冷静
Just because your grandma's dead
虽然你祖母死了
doesn't mean she can't look hot."
可那不代表她就不能看起来性感点
Great philosophy.
真是深奥的哲学啊
That's why she put it on her business card.
所以她写在了她的名片上
Listen, when I die, you just pull out the stops.
听着我死的时候你尽管这样做
I wanna look peaceful, but doable.
让我看起来很平静但让人浮想联翩
Please tell me you're not taking Jim on your date with you.
别告诉我你要带着Jim去约会
He's a hell of an icebreaker.
他可是打破僵局的好手
He can stay here with us. Come on in.
让他待我这吧快进来
I brought a couple outfits.
我带来了两套衣服
I wanted something that looks feminine...
我想看来很女人
...but doesn't make him think
但别让他觉得
I'm lifting my skirt, ringing the dinner bell.
我撩开裙就能让他打一炮
Well, it's probably a good idea to stick with the stretch pants.
那大概坚持弹力裤不失一个好主意
Sweet lord, this is nerve-racking.
上帝啊这真是伤脑筋
Why do women put themselves through this?
为什么女人要让自己经历这些
I don't have an answer,
我可没答案
but let's not make too big of a deal out of this.
但是别小题大做
Remember, it's just dinner.
这只是顿晚餐
Well, bear in mind, I haven't
但你得考虑到差不多有40年
been on a date with a man in almost 40 years.
我没和男人约会了
So there's been nobody since Mike's dad?
Mike老爹死后你就没约过会了吗
Nobody before or after.
他爹死前死后都没有
This keg was only tapped for one party.
一生只有他一人
Unlike you gals today,
不像你们现在