迈克和茉莉（2010）
Mike & Molly S01E11
Part 1
Dec. 15, 2020, 2:37 p.m.
Wow, what a fun night.
哇 今晚可真不错啊
We got to watch two guys joust
观看双人格斗赛
while eating wild boar with our bare hands.
还光着手撕扯享用着野猪肉
Wild boar my ass, it was ham loaf.
才不是野猪肉 那是火腿块
Let us not quibble, saucy wench.
才不跟你吵了呢 美丽的姑娘
Oh, apologies, sire.
哦 抱歉 陛下
Maybe next weekend we can go to the museum.
没准下周我们去博物馆呢
Uh, maybe. We'll talk about it.
嗯 也许呢 再说吧
Why the hell's the chain on?
怎么这他妈的门链给锁上了
Who's in there?
谁在里面
I don't know. The only other person who has a key is Carl.
不知道 此外只有Carl才有这的钥匙
Why does Carl have a key to your apartment?
Carl怎么会有这的钥匙呢
Oh, I gave him one in case I'm out of town.
哦 我给他了一片以免我不在镇上
I need him to bring in mail, water my plants.
我叫他帮我取信件 替我给花草浇水
Well, you're not out of town and you don't have any plants.
呃 可你现在就在镇上 并且你也没有什么花草的
Well, he's probably in there doing some broad.
没准他在这泡妞呢
Mike, that's disgusting.
Mike 你真恶心
Sorry. He's in there making sweet love to some broad.
不好意思 他确实在这和某个妞做♥爱♥
Ow.
嗷
So you're telling me right now he's in there having sex on our bed?
你的意思是他现在正在我们的床上翻云覆雨
I don't think so. Carl likes to stand and deliver.
我觉得不是 Carl喜欢站着射
Oh, God. I don't wanna know that.
哦天啊 我可不要知道这些
How often does this happen?
这种情况多久发生一次
I gave him the key about four years ago, so what is that?
我大概四年前给他的钥匙 那么情况是什么呢
Once every four years.
四年一次么
We're going back to my place.
那我们去我那儿吧
I don't know about that.
真的要这样吗
I'm still not real comfortable you know,
我仍然对在你妈妈和姐姐能
sleeping over with your mom and sister within earshot.
听到我们声音的环境下过夜感到不舒服
Come on, girl, spank my butt. Please.
来吧宝贝儿 打我屁♥股♥ 求你了
Your place, it is. Make haste. Make haste.
去你那儿吧 就这么定了 赶紧走 赶紧走
Morning, sunshine.
早啊 阳光
Morning. Did you sleep okay?
早啊 昨晚睡得安稳么
Mm-hmm.
还行吧
You must've been really exhausted last night.
你昨晚肯定累坏了
The minute your head hit the pillow, you were out like a light.
你的头一碰到枕头立马就睡着了
Nothing could wake you.
怎么都吵不醒你
Not whispering in your ear, not massaging your shoulders.
不管是在你耳边说话 还是推搡你的肩膀
Not a gentle tap with ye old jousting pole.
或是用你的旧长矛轻轻拍打你也不行
You know, some nights, Mike, we're just gonna go to sleep.
你知道吗Mike 在一些晚上 我们就躺着睡觉就好
That's not a problem, is it?
这没什么问题 对吧
No, not at all.
是的 完全没问题
Besides, it's the waking up next to you that I live for.
而且 我真是为了能在你身边醒过来而活着的
And how many times last night did I say:
那我昨晚说了多少遍
"Please stop poking me in the back with your jousting pole"?
"求你别再用你的长矛从后面捅我了"
Four. You had to say it four times. Ha, ha.
四次 你说了四次 哈哈
Well, unh, I guess on the upside,
嗯 我估计在楼上
Carl got to have sex last night.
Carl昨晚肯定云雨了
Oh, there it is.
噢 又来了
The minute he's out of there,
只要他一搬出来
I'll bring in an entire cleaning crew.
我立马叫一整队清洁工来
Guys that do crime scenes
是那些清理犯罪现场的人
they can get brains out of air conditioning fans.
他们能把脑浆从空调风扇上清理干净哦
I just thought your apartment was our secret little getaway.
我想你的公♥寓♥是我们的秘密小避风港
A place where no one would bother us.
是一个没人能打扰到我们的地方
And now, it just feels like
但是现在 却像是
the happy ending room at the Chicken Ranch.
欢愉过后的养鸡农场
I'll get the key back from him.
我会把钥匙要回来的
If he needs it again, he can schedule something.
如果他再需要的话 他得先有所安排
You are really not hearing me.
你根本没有用心听我跟你说话
I'm talking about on one of our sex-free nights.
我们不是正说着一个没有性♥爱♥的晚上吗
By the way, how often's that gonna happen?
顺便问一下 这每隔多久一次啊
You know, so I can bring over a book or a puzzle.
你懂的 这样我便可以带本书来或者填谜语了
You're a real class act, Vince.
你可真能演啊 Vince
Oh, you need your space?
噢 你需要自己的空间
What you need is hair plugs and a breath mint.
你需要只是卷发棒和薄荷糖
What's going on? Mom's breaking up with Vince.
怎么回事 妈正和Vince吵架呢
Fine. I want my garage
很好 把车♥库♥还我
clicker and my Walgreens senior discount card.
还有我的Walgreens高级打折卡
Let's see what kind of Casanova you are when paying full price
等你用全价为你的伟哥付账的时候我们就
for your boner pills.
知道你到底是个怎样的好色之徒了
Mmm, coffee.
对了 咖啡
Mom, Forget that creep. You could do better than him.
妈妈 忘了那个怂人吧 你会找的更好的
And I will.
我确实会
What do you men want from us?
你们男人想从我们这得到些什么
We cook for you, we clean for you,
我们为你们做饭 为你们洗衣服
we destroy our bodies giving you children.
我们为了给你们生孩子糟蹋了自己的身体
Not that I'd trade either one of you for my old boobs.
并不是说我会牺牲你们任何一个去换回我原来的胸部
You know, I would love to stay and chat,
你知道 我其实是很乐意留下来聊聊
but I should probably skedaddle.
但我还是跑路的好
Oh, yeah, that's what you do best. You run.
是呀 你最好这样 跑路吧
Leaving us with nothing but
而留下我们
heartache and a crotch full of stubble burn.
昏沉的头和麻木火烧的胯部
You know what? I don't need any coffee.
你猜怎么着 我才不需要什么咖啡
I am wide awake. Bye-bye.
我可清醒得很呢 再见
You know, if they'd invent a
知道吗 如果有人能发明一种
vibrator that killed spiders and did the cha-cha...
能杀死蜘蛛 能跳恰恰舞的震动棒
...we wouldn't need any of them.
我们就再也不需要他们了
Mm-mm-mmm.
咳咳咳
There's nothing like a night of good loving to
没有什么比一夜春宵更能
make a man feel alive.
让男人恢复活力的了
I wouldn't know.
我怎么会知道呢
Going through a little bit of a dry spell, are you?
昨晚遇上干旱了
Don't worry, I'm getting enough for the both of us.
别担心 我那边水多得足以够我俩用了
Good for you. I want my key back.
很好 我想拿回我的钥匙
What are you talking about?
你说啥
I haven't ridden all the rides,
我还没试完所有的骑行姿势呢
and you're trying to shut down Six Flags Over Carl.
而且你居然妄图关闭Carl的性福乐园
Why can't you go to her place?
为什么你就不能去她那儿呢
I'm not comfortable having sex
因为我在做♥爱♥的时候
in a bunk bed with her sister underneath us
一想到她姐姐就在底下在热盘子上做泡菜
cooking kimchi on a hot plate.
就觉得不舒服
Wait, she's Korean? I think she's Korean.
慢着 她是个韩国人 我觉得她是
Is "Carl, too beaucoup" Korean?
"Carl 好大啊" 是韩国话
No, "Carl, too beaucoup" Is a lie.
不 "Carl 好大啊" 是谎话
Whatever. You gotta give me one more night.
好吧 你得再给我用最后一晚
Oh, Carl. Please. I can't bring her back to my place.
天啊 Carl 求你了 我不能带她去我那儿
My grandma's gonna make her do the laundry.
我奶奶会让她去洗衣服的
All right, I can give you one more night, then I need the key back.
好吧 我再给你用一晚 然后我就得收回我的钥匙了
Thank you. You're a great man.
谢了 你可真是个大好人
Which, by the way, in Korean is:
用韩语说就是
Heard that a lot last night. Ah.
昨晚听到很多这 哦
All right, the dishes have been washed and dried.
好了 所有的盘子都洗完且擦干了
Oh, wait, there's one more dish.
哦 慢着 这还有一个
I think this one, I'll just lick clean. Ha, ha, Mike.
我想这个我还是舔干净呗 哈哈 Mike
Wanna go upstairs and burn off dinner?
上楼去燃烧掉晚饭吧
I can't. I have, like, three-hours worth of papers to grade.
不行 有接近三个小时量的论文等着我去批改呢
Three hours? What am I supposed to do for three hours?
三个小时 那我这三个小时要干嘛呢
What did you do before you had a girlfriend?
你在没有女朋友之前都干嘛呢
I didn't do dishes, I can tell you that.
告诉你吧 我甚至都不会洗盘子的
Go watch TV. So is that it?
去看电视吧 就这样
We're never gonna have sex again?
我们不再做♥爱♥了
What is the matter with you?
你这到底是怎么了
It's only been one night.
就一个晚上嘛
I know. But it's a bad pattern.
我知道 但这可不是个好榜样
You hear about couples that lose that part of their relationship.
你有听到情侣们在相处时少了这个部分
Next thing you know, she's joined a book club
接着你所知道的就是 她加入了一个书友会
and he's rubbing up against old ladies in a grocery store.
而他在一间杂货店里与老太太们在耳鬓厮磨
Listen to me. I didn't say "Not at all" Or "Never again."
听我说 我可没说过"完全不"或是"再也不"
I said "Not now," Okay?
我说的是"现在不"好吗
迈克和茉莉（2010）
Mike & Molly
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