生活点滴（2015）

Life in Pieces S02E20

Part 2 Oct. 12, 2020, 11:35 a.m.

How would you feel if I revealed
你会做何感想如果我泄露了
that one of you wet the bed into adulthood?
你们中有人直到成人了还尿床
Or had an emotional affair
或者在心理上出轨了
with your tennis coach?
和你的网球教练
Or, or got an erection
或者是勃起了
during a Pixar movie?
在看皮克斯动画的时候
WALL-E looked like my first girlfriend.
瓦力看上去像我的初恋女友
So, Heather, you really think
所以希瑟你真的觉得
he'll grow out of wanting to sleep in our bed every night?
他有一天能长大不要再睡在我们的床上吗
Oh, yeah, come on,
是的当然我告诉过你
I told you he'd learn to wipe himself
他会学着自己擦屁♥股♥的
before middle school, didn't I?
在中学之前不是吗
You are such a good mom, Heather.
你真是个好妈妈希瑟
Oh, thank you.
谢谢你
Hi. Oh, hey!
嗨哦嘿
Sorry, just wanted to come by
抱歉我只是顺路过来
and bring back these hand-me-downs.
把这些用过的东西还给你
No offense, but I think we want to make our own stains.
无意冒犯但我们想要留下自己的污渍
What are you, what are you doing off of work?
你在干什么呢你今天不上班吗
Oh, we had to take our vacation days.
我们得休假
Yeah, one of the partners
对我们的一个合伙人
had what the psychologist called
得了心理医生所称的
a "fecal freak-out" in the office bathroom,
"粪便失控" 在上班的厕所里
which was not something HR wanted happening twice.
人事部不想再有这样的事情发生
Oh, well, the exciting life of a lawyer.
律师的人生真精彩
You guys, this is my sister-in-law, Jen.
各位这个是我的妯娌珍
Hi. This is Patty, Kevin's mom. Irene,
嗨这是帕蒂凯文的妈妈伊莱妮
Daisy's mom, and Marsha has the triplets.
黛西的妈妈还有玛莎生了三胞胎
Whoa. I love your necklace.
哇我喜欢你的项链
Oh, thank you. It's new.
谢谢这个是新的
Yeah, my husband got it for me. Aw.
我老公给我买♥♥的哇
He hasn't seen it yet.
但他还没见过
God, you look so nice, and we're all just super cas.
天哪你看上去棒极了我们都穿的好随便
Oh, well, hey, if it makes you feel any better,
嘿如果能让你好受一点
I haven't washed my bra in a month.
我已经一个月没有洗胸罩了
Well, I'm dressed casually because I get puked on a lot.
我穿得很随意是因为我常常被吐在身上
Oh, yeah, I can imagine with triplets.
是的我能想象带三胞胎
And my husband's an alcoholic. Yeah.
我老公是个酒鬼这样
Oh, hey. Do you want a glass of wine?
嘿你要来杯红酒吗
Listen, Marsha brought a whole box.
看玛莎带来了一整箱
Wow. White wine in the afternoon.
哇下午来杯白葡萄酒
Feel like a dentist's wife.
感觉就像是牙医的老婆
It was so nice hanging out with other moms instead of lawyers.
和其他妈妈们玩比和律师们出去开心多了
You know? Like, I actually felt heard.
你知道吗我觉得自己真正被人倾听了
Oh, honey, of course you're pretty.
亲爱的你当然很漂亮
Hey, uh, I got this new patch growing in the back,
嘿呃我后面又长了一撮毛
will you just do it for me?
你能帮我刮一下吗
Y-You know, I think for the sake of our marriage,
你知道吗我觉得为了我们的婚姻幸福
we should just, each be responsible for our own hair removal.
我们应该自己处理各自的脱毛问题
Hey!
嘿
Hi.
嗨
Wow, you guys look so different.
哇你们看上去真不一样
I didn't know that we were showering today.
我不知道我们今天要穿得那么隆重
Take a seat. We got big news. Yeah.
快坐下我们有大新闻是吗
Oh, oh.
哦哦
Patty finally got her son to sleep in his own bed.
帕蒂的儿子终于睡自己床上了
Oh, Pat... Yeah. So,
哦帕是的所以
we just need to figure out how to get Marsha
我们现在只要想办法怎么样让玛莎
to get her husband to sleep in his own bed
的老公睡到自己床上
instead of in the driveway with his head on the horn.
而不是头枕着喇叭睡在车道上
Okay.
好的
Yeah... O-Okay. But, yeah.
是的... 好吧但是好吧
Oh, yeah, she just waltzed in, you know,
是的她就这样大摇大摆得走进来你知道吗
in her fancy clothes, bragging about her job.
穿着她精致的衣服炫耀她的工作
Oh, that feels so good, it's like a massage.
这感觉太棒了就像是在按♥摩♥
All right, all done.
好了搞定了
No, no, no, couple more minutes, please.
不不不再多来几分钟求你了
Okay.
好吧
All right, I know this sounds crazy,
好吧我知道这听起来很疯狂
but I felt like the girls...
但我觉得女孩们
like Jen better than they liked me.
比起我更喜欢珍
Ah, don't worry, the more they get to know her,
别担心她们越了解她
the more she'll make them feel fat, dumb and bald.
越会觉得自己又胖又笨没内涵
Okay, ladies, it was not easy with the book fair
女士们书展绝非易事
and the school gala coming up,
学校的联欢也即将举♥行♥
but guess who got us all set up
猜猜是谁为我们所有人安排了
for spa day?
水疗一天
Was it Jen?
是珍吗
No. No, it-it was me.
不不是是我
It wasn't Jen, she's off prioritizing work again,
不是珍她又忙她的工作去了
but, guys, I-I set us up!
但各位亲我都为咱们安排好了
All right, let me text Jen to make sure she can come.
好吧那我给珍发信息确认她能来
Oh, my God, you have her number? Give it to me.
天哪你有她号♥码发给我
Okay, guys? Hi... Listen, you know what?
亲们听我说知道吗
This is the only weekend that we can go,
我们只有这周末能去
so I don't think it really matters if Jen's available
所以我觉得珍能不能去都不重要啊
because we... Yeah? So Jen just texted,
因为我们好吧珍刚刚回信息了
"In meeting," and then the kitty Home Alone face,
"在开会" 配了凯蒂猫在家留守的表情
with a gun.
还手持手♥枪♥
She's gonna kill herself! Oh, my God, I get it!
她是要自杀嘛哈哈我懂了
Wait, you don't think she's really gonna do it, do you?
等下你不会觉得她真要自杀吧
No, I don't. I think there's only one person in this room
我不觉得我觉得这间屋子只有一个人
that's really gonna kill herself.
会真的自杀
Hey, listen, Jen,
嘿珍听我说
I'm sorry that you can't make it to spa day,
我很遗憾你不能去做水疗
but we can't just rearrange the schedule
但我们也不能因为你工作忙
because you're busy with work.
就重新安排
You know, we're busy, too.
毕竟我们也忙
Okay, yeah, cool, so just go without me.
那就别等我直接去呗
Okay, well, they don't want to go without you.
但是没你她们也不想去
That's the problem.
这是问题所在
You know, they're shaving above the knee now.
知道吗她们现在脱毛都到膝盖以上了
That's on you.
都是因为你
Well, I'm honestly surprised they have time to do that.
老实说我很惊讶她们居然有时间这么做
I mean, these women with the group texting.
毕竟她们不停地在群聊
It's like oy vay.
都是些不疼不痒的事
Also, what does "black thumbs down,
另外 "黑拇指向下
heart, heart, eggplant" mean?
心心茄子" 是什么意思啊
Well, Patty has a love-hate thing with baba ghanoush.
帕蒂对巴巴加诺什又爱又恨
Which you would know
如果你对她们
Oh, okay.
原来如此好
if you were half as invested in these women as I am.
花的心思有我一半你就会知道了
And, what... Are those free sodas?
这些苏打水是免费供应吗
Yeah, yeah, they'll do anything to keep us in the office.
对他们想方设法希望我们能留在办公室
Oh, God, well, at least you have an office.
不错你至少还有间办公室
Tim fired me from the only job that I've ever had.
我只有过一份工作提姆还把我解雇了
And now working moms judge me
如今那些有工作的妈妈对我评头论足
because I stay at home.
就因为我待在家
Yeah, Heather, the thing is, like,
希瑟是这样的就好像
stay-at-home moms judge me because I leave my kid all day.
全职妈妈也会批判我因为我整天不带孩子
I guess I'll cut to the chase
我还是开门见山吧
just because I'm-I'm losing billable hours here.
就不浪费时间了因为我这里是按时计费
My point is, everyone judges everyone
我想说每个人都会去评价别人
for everything and life is just, really, a lose-lose.
生活真的是双输
God, it is so good to hear you say that.
听你这么说真是太好了
I think what's best for us is probably that
我想我还是退出你的朋友圈
I'm just not a part of your friend group anymore.
这样对我们最好
Oh, honey, they are never gonna let you go.
亲爱的她们不会让你走的
Really? Watch this.
真的吗看着
"Stop texting me all day, I have a real job."
"别整天给我发信息了我有真正的工作要忙"