闺蜜离婚指南（2014）

Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce S01E04

Part 1 April 6, 2021, 9:55 a.m.

《闺蜜离婚指南》前情提要
Previously on girlfriends' guide to divorce...
杰克他走了我自♥由♥了
Jake, he's gone. I'm free.
那内特呢已婚的内特呢
So what about Nate, married Nate?
生命中有你这样的人
Having somebody like you in my life,
我觉得太棒了
it's just-- it's amazing.
-你看上去美极了 -谢谢
- You look spectacular... - Thank you.
一如既往的美你能不能跟我老公说一下
As always. Will you please tell my husband
不该穿个睡裤就来送孩子
pajama pants are not acceptable drop-off wear?
你是想让我在车里等着
Oh, do you want me to wait in the car,
这样就不会丢你的脸吗
so you won't be embarrassed?
你根本不该带孩子
You never should have had kids.
什么
What?
我要上诉索要抚养权
I'm gonna sue for full custody.
我也想你了
一起喝咖啡吧
这场演出太棒了
That play was amazing.
查理和洛根演得太好了那些布景设计
Charlie and Logan killed it, and the production design--
美得令人窒息
breathtakingly gorgeous.
记得我们看《蜘蛛侠:消灭黑暗》的时候吗
Remember when we saw "Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark"?
百老汇音乐剧
-这个好多了 -没错
- This was way better. - Yeah.
台上那一米八的人偶再加那匹活生生的马
6-foot-tall puppets and a live horse onstage.
我都不知道是怎么把马弄上舞台的
I don't even know how you get a live horse on the stage.
-那可麻烦了 -妈妈饼干
- That's a lot of little steps. - Mama, cookies!
查理才第二幕呢你得回后台去
Charlie, only two. You have to go backstage.
-你还有演出呢 -那匹马
- You have another show. - Okay, so that horse?
是凯特·布兰切特的
Cate Blanchett's.
她这是在拍马屁
She's sucking up.
不然她的孩子就得去洛杉矶了
May move the kids to L.A.
她想要孩子...
She wants the kids--
她还得到处拍马屁才能把孩子送这来
She has to suck up to get the kids in here?
那咱们的孩子是怎么进来的
How did we get in here?
我们是混血基佬而你曾是大名鼎鼎的
Well, we're biracial gay, and you were a big--
你是大名鼎鼎的现在还是...
You are a big... you are--
你用了过去式
That was past tense.
你觉得我没听出来
Do you think I didn't--
不你知道你可是大名人妹子
No, girl, you know you a big deal.
-艾比 -超级明星
- Abby. - Huge deal.
我过会儿再来找你们
I'm gonna see you guys in a minute.
刚刚真是太棒了
Hi, that was fantastic, right?
谁会知道拓荒者还是这么厉害的空中飞人
Who knew the pioneers could be such amazing trapeze artists?
我觉得正因如此他们才穿越了大半个国家
I think that's how they got across the country--
被抓了又被放了循环往复
Catch and release, catch and release.
你太聪明了真希望我能和你一样
You're so smart. I want to be more like you.
-我知道 -真的我得走了
- I know. - I really do. I'm gonna go.
-维卡和梅雷特在等我 -再见
- Vika and Merete are waiting. - Bye.
-再见 -好的再见
- Bye. - All right, bye.
天哪菲比果然是那对欧洲夫妻的朋友
God, of course Phoebe and that Euro couple are friends.
"你的骨架真棒
"You have great bone structure.
我们的骨架也很棒"
We have great bone structure."
家庭平等晚会上你准备穿什么
Hey, what are you wearing to the Family Equality Gala?
黑色吊带裙
Um, oh, a black strappy number
再加适当的嘲讽
and a healthy dose of irony.
欢迎离异者来参加家庭平等晚会哦
Divorcees for Family Equality, yay.
-到时候会有伏特加吗 -当然了
- Is there gonna be vodka? - Oh, yeah.
我告诉他们只有给艾比准备伏特加
I told them we will accept the award with honors,
我们才愿意上台领奖
but only if there's vodka for Abby.
所以我才爱你
This is why I love you.
我能私下见见阿黛尔·诺斯洛普吗
And am I gonna be able to meet Adele Northrop in person?
我是头号♥粉丝
I'm a huge fan.
要是你能带你弟弟
If you take your brother to buy a suit
去买♥♥套现代人穿的衣服
that was designed in this century,
我绝对能介绍你俩认识
I will absolutely introduce you.
我的衣服好着呢
My suits are fine.
我还有两个大策划没做
I've got two big jobs I have to finish the plans for,
现在还在弄星期六比赛的阵容
and I'm still working on the lineup for Saturday's game.
他是全世界最敬业的儿童棒球教练
World's most dedicated little league coach--
太荒唐了
It's ridiculous.
艾比你还在听吗
Abby, you still with us?
谁让你整个人都飘飘然了
Who got you all aflutter?
-你在跟人调情 -瞧她那激动样
- You're flirting. - She's aflutter.
你在跟谁调情
Who--who are you flirting with?
没有谁我没有
Nobody. I'm not--I'm not.
我在跟莱拉聊
I'm talking to Lyla,
我要带麦克斯去买♥♥衣服了
and I'm gonna go take Max shopping for a suit.
我在一心多用我总是一心多用
I'm multitasking. I'm always multitasking.
那才不是莱拉
That was not Lyla.
那是个男人
That was a man.
你觉得橙色的马甲衬我的眼睛吗
除非你的眼睛也是橙色的
这场离婚已经彻底演变成抚养权争夺战
This divorce has turned into a full-blown custody battle,
丹以我工作时间较长为由
and Dan is using my work hours
称我长♥期♥不在家照顾孩子
against me to show that I am an absentee parent,
还收集了不少证词
and several affidavits have been filed...
包括巴罗斯校长的
including one by Principal Barrows
说我有慢性愤怒管理障碍
that says I have a chronic anger-management problem.
这结论从哪得出来的
Based on what? I might add.
我时常生气我承认
I get angry from time to time, justifiably,
但我能控制好
but I manage it.
-我都控制好了 -什么叫"控制好"
- I manage it. - Define "Manage."
怎么回事你是在和
What, are you having a relationship
你的操作系统谈恋爱吗
with your operating system?
-不好意思 -你脸上都发光了
- No, sorry. - You are glowing.
我不骗你
Not gonna lie.
所以你要么在和人调情
So you're either flirting,
要么就是麦克斯刚告诉你他不是基佬了
or Max has just texted you he's not gay anymore,
而且他爱上了你的朋友菲比
and he's in love with your friend Phoebe.
好吧
Okay.
内特和我一直在聊天他...
Nate and I have been texting, and he's--
我们明天一起管停车
We have carpool tomorrow together,
这样就能见面了
so we're gonna see each other.
-太棒了 -他还没离婚呢
- That's great. - He's still married.
没错我俩之间什么都还没发生
Yes, he is, and nothing's happened between us.
-马上就要发生了 -住手
- But it's about to. - Stop it!
阿努克卢科
Anouk! Luco!
-别看我 -每次都这样
- Don't look at me. - Every time.
-我要告诉妈妈 -真不好意思
- I'm telling mom! - I'm so sorry.
我去管管他们
I will take care of them.
你们先聊
You guys, go about yourself.
对她说的话得持保留态度
You know, take--take what she says with a grain of salt.
她原本就随意地游走在现实生活之中
She has a very casual relationship with reality.
我的天
Oh, my God.
暂时换个话题吧
Change of subject just for a moment.
你能保守秘密吗
Can you keep a secret?
可能六♥四♥开吧
60/40?
-别这样 -行内讲我当然可以
- Come on. - Professionally, I can,
-但现在下班了我就说不准了 -别这样
- but off the clock, it's a crapshoot, lady. - Please, come on.
-我快憋死了我得告诉你 -那好吧
- I'm dying. I have to tell you. - Okay, okay.
你知道学校里那对超靓的外国夫妻吗
You know that gorgeous couple at school, they're foreigners?
男的是英国人女的我不知道是哪的
He's a Brit, she's--I don't know.
反正是外国人
She's from somewhere that's not here.
我今天看到菲比和维卡在亲热
Anyway, I saw Phoebe today making out with Vika.
她又喜欢上女人了吗
So she's into girls again?
不不不是那个丈夫叫维卡
No, no, Vika's the husband.
-不 -是的
- No. - Yes.
-不丈夫是叫梅雷特 -不不不
- No, Merete is the husband. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
-我知道维卡是丈夫 -哪个是英国人来着
- I know Vika is the husband-- - Which one's British?
说重点重点在于
Okay, the point-- the point being
菲比在和男方亲热
Phoebe was kissing the male,
那个已婚的男人
the married male.
你也在和一个有妇之夫发短♥信♥
And you're texting the married male.
是的但这不一样
Yeah, but that is not the same.