闺蜜离婚指南（2014）

Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce S01E02

Part 4 April 6, 2021, 9:54 a.m.

We install landscape
-都是我设计的 -那就是种地的
- that I design. - So planting?
-当我没说 -抱歉我只是...
- Jesus. Screw me for offering. - I'm sorry. I was--
我开玩笑的
I'm-- I'm just kidding.
我没想取笑你
I don't mean to sound like that.
谢谢你我会考虑的
I appreciate it. I'll think about it.
没事我们是一家人
Of course, you're family.
如果你要用钱
You know, if you need some time money-wise,
艾比不会不给的
Abby's not gonna freeze you out.
不好说
That's complicated.
为什么
Why?
或许是因为我觉得自己很没种
Maybe because I feel like I don't got any balls.
你不能这么想
You can't-- you can't think that way, dude.
我了解我姐你可以依赖她
And I know my sister. You can depend on her.
她还爱着你
She still loves you.
她也恨我
And she hates me,
大家都在猜...
and it's anybody's guess which side--
好球好球
There you go! There you go!
-快跑快跑 -打得好
- Run, run, run, run, run, run! - There you go!
好踩那里那里
Okay, okay. Stay there, stay there.
-快跑快跑 -太棒了
- Come on, come on, come on, keep coming. - There you go!
-快跑 -太棒了
- Come on, come on. - Yeah!
太棒了
Yeah!
丹那件事办好了吗
The thing with Dan, you get it all done?
四十份申请都发出去了
I got the applications, all 40 of them.
好谢谢你
Good. Thank you.
喂是我
Hello? Yes.
等等
Hold on.
喂
Hello?
等等
Hold on.
哪家餐厅
And this is for which restaurant?
养生汤馆我...
Souplantation? I...
等等
Hold on.
你从哪弄到这个号♥码的
How did you get this number?
是的在辣椒家工作我资历的确过高了
Yes, I agree I'm overqualified to work at Chili's.
把我的申请扔了吧
Lose my goddamn application.
-加油艾比加油 -我讨厌你
- Come on, Abby, push it! - I hate you.
-膝盖抬高 -膝盖
- Pick your knees up. - Knees?
得再抬高点
Pick-- they have to go higher.
跑到头
All the way through.
天哪
Oh, my God.
接着做深蹲
Now squats.
老天让我歇会儿
Jesus. Give me a minute.
谢谢你今天来见我
So...thanks for showing up today.
我知道你生我的气
I know you're pissed at me.
策略不错让我累到吼不出来
Awesome strategy, getting me too exhausted to yell at you.
我说了蠢话对不起
I said something really stupid, and I'm sorry.
我知道你的本意是好的真的
I know you meant well, I really do.
我爱你们俩
I just love you guys.
你俩还是我介绍的
I introduced you two.
我无法想象
I can't imagine--
我也是但杰克回家就睡沙发
Yeah, me neither, but Jake is living on the couch
出去就找他那火♥辣♥的女朋友
if he's not sleeping with his superhot girlfriend,
莉莉已经不跟我说话了
and Lilly is barely speaking to me,
我们还要参加那个婚姻调解
and we have this session with the mediator coming up.
调解
Mediator?
比起律师他们更像是顾问
They're more like counselors than lawyers.
他们帮双方各自让步达成一致
They help you agree on compromises
避免闹上法庭互相结怨之类的
and avoid legal hell and all the animosity and--
要是他们觉得你们不该分开呢
What if they think that you should still be together?
麦克斯
Max.
我随口一说你得考虑全面婚姻...
I'm just saying, keep an open mind. Marriage--
今天就别高谈阔论了拜托了
It's no-judgment day today. Please.
抱歉
Sorry.
菲菲
Hey, Pheeps.
好啊
Okay.
菲比刚约我去跟她约会
I think I was just asked out on a gay date by Phoebe.
-那个女模特吗 -是啊
- The model? - Yeah.
她想跟我单独吃饭
She wants to have dinner with me alone.
她是同性恋什么时候开始的
She's gay? Since when?
她更像是双性恋
She's more ambisexual,
但前些天她的确亲了我
but she planted one on me the other night.
天哪简直是循序渐进啊
What? I mean, talk about burying the lead.
我知道太疯狂了
I know. It's so crazy.
她差不多要我跟她上♥床♥了
She basically offered to take me to bed.
你会同意吗
Are you gonna let her?
她真是性感到爆
She's sexy as hell.
天哪天哪
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
如果你也成了同性恋爸妈绝对会气疯的
Oh, my--if you go gay too, mom and dad would plotz.
她的确温柔可人
No, I mean, she was very soft,
头发很香
and her hair smelled really good,
但不知道算不算损失我还是喜欢男人
but for better or for worse, I'm all about dick.
我俩一样姐姐
You and me both, sister.
你倒是状态不错啊
You look great, by the way.
这边请
Right this way.
-你太紧张了 -是啊
- You're so tense. - Yeah.
-你真该做个按♥摩♥什么的 -是吗
- You need a massage or something. - Something.
我为你准备了个惊喜
I have a surprise for you.
我觉得你肯定跟她来电
I seriously think you're gonna click with this gal.
这是干什么相亲吗
What is this? Is this a setup?
别生气
Don't be mad.
借过
Excuse me.
菲比我很珍惜我们的友情
Phoebe, I treasure our friendship so much,
但我不是同性恋或双性恋
but I am not gay or bi.
我也不会被你或你朋友吸引到
And I'm not attracted to you in that way or your friend.
你说什么呢
What are you talking about?
你安排我和女人约会
You are setting me up with a woman,
那天晚上还亲了我
and--and you kissed me the other night.
天哪真抱歉
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry.
我酒品有点差
I'm such a lezzy drunk.
我都记不全发生了什么
Half the time, I don't even remember I do it.
那是迪莉娅·巴耐我的离婚律师
That's Delia Banai, my divorce lawyer.
天哪
Oh, my God.
我现在都没心思考虑性的事
I'm not even thinking about sex right now.
我全身心投入在新事业中呢
Now I'm really focused on my new business.
-新事业啊 -是啊
- Oh, on your business? - Yes.
什么事业
Wow, what is it?
不知道我还在考虑
I don't know. I'm still meditating on it.
但我觉得机会快来了
But I feel it coming.
-那太好了 -跟我来
- Okay. - Come with me.
迪莉娅她是艾比
Delia, this is Abby.
-艾比她是迪莉娅 -迪莉娅
- Abby, this is Delia. - Delia.
菲比没跟我说你这么诱人
Phoebe didn't tell me you are such a dish.
谢谢认识你很高兴
Thank you. Nice to meet you.
等你准备好
When you're ready, I have, Like,
我可有50位离婚男士要给你介绍
50 divorced guys to introduce you to.
谢谢
Thank you.
调解啊
So mediation--
你还不如把你的钱都烧了
you may as well burn all your money
然后立刻搬进收♥容♥所♥
and move into a homeless shelter right now.
-什么 -我听说
- What? - No. I was told--
调解员都是骗子为什么
Mediators are jackals. Why?
因为他们总宣传一个理念"完美离婚"
Because they prey on the idea of a "Good divorce."
根本没有这回事
There is no such thing.
总有人会吃亏因为他们很伤心
There is one person getting fleeced because they feel bad.
是你在赚钱养家对吧
You're the earner, right?
妥协对你没好处
You don't want someone to fight for compromise.
你需要有人为你争取
You want someone to fight for you.
杰克也会工作
Jake works, too.
只是还在适应
He's just transitioning.
他已经适应了十年