废柴联盟（2009）

Community S06E12

Part 4 Oct. 19, 2020, 1:12 p.m.

You don't show these to people when you finish them?
拍完后你不会放给别人看吧
No. Okay, good.
不会太好了
So then why do you make them, again?
那你为什么拍呢
It relaxes me.
这让我感到轻松
It's like knitting with less discipline.
就像织毛衣一样但没那么多规矩
Princess Firebreath.
喷火公主
Sir Pent.
幽禁爵士
Doctor Rachel Spinetail.
瑞秋·针尾雀博士
Holly Hotbreath.
荷莉·灼热吐息
Jimmy Talon.
龙爪吉米[吉米·法♥伦♥谐音]
Christian Scale.
克里斯蒂安鳞[克里斯蒂安·贝尔谐音]
I got into a bit of a celebrity pun barrel here.
这里我用了几个名人名字的谐音
Carson Scaley.
龙甲卡森[卡森·戴利谐音]
Jude Claw.
裘德爪[裘德·洛谐音]
Ariana Puffington.
阿里安娜·大冒险[阿里安娜·赫芬顿谐音]
Are these your biggest ice cubes?
这是你们最大的冰块了吗
No, you're boisterous!
你才放肆
Where's my brother!?
我弟弟呢
I've gotta thing to say about my friend Garrett!
关于我朋友加瑞特我有话要说
There has been a plot twist
我们重新成为婚礼嘉宾后
in the story of our comeback as wedding guests.
剧情出现了转折
Garrett's older brother Bones
加瑞特的哥哥伯恩斯
has relapsed during his weekend pass
在这个周末又犯病了
and will be unable to do the best man toast.
因此无法做伴郎致辞了
You got him?
扶稳了
So, I took Garrett's mom's side
所以我找到加瑞特的妈妈
and told her after our behavior today,
告诉她由于我们今天的所作所为
it was the least I could do for them.
这是我所能做的最起码的补偿了
And I'm not gonna Winger speech it,
我不会像以前那样做翁格洗♥脑♥演讲
this is a thing of substance.
这次会有相当实在的内容
We pooled all the inside info based on all the mingling,
我们汇集了在场所有人的内部消息
and this toast is rocket fueled selflessness.
我的致辞将是一枚饱含着无私精神的火箭
And this wedding is gonna regret the day
如果你们觉得这场婚礼又是我们的
it thought we'd make it about us.
一次自我展示秀就大错特错了
Because we're about to be the first guests
因为我们将成为史上第一队
in history to out-toast the entire wedding party.
把致辞说得震惊全场的婚礼嘉宾
God, I love my job!
天啊我爱死我的工作了
Wait, this isn't my job.
等等这不是我的工作
God, I love myself!
天啊我爱死我自己了
That was Stacy's
那是史黛西的
first time!
第一次
But it's not gonna be her last time, right Garrett?
但不会是最后一次对吧加瑞特
So many classic toast errors.
好多典型致辞失误啊
A fire hydrant could follow this.
赶紧给她灭灭火吧
I love you so much, and please, keep painting.
我非常爱你一定不要放弃画画
Don't let Garrett, don't paint.
别因为加瑞特就不再画画了
Don't let Garrett keep you from painting.
别让加瑞特阻止你画画
Okay, I'm done.
我说完了
Okay, Stacy's friend Andi, everybody.
史黛西的朋友安迪大家给她送上掌声
Next up we have a replacement best man,
接下来上场的是替补伴郎
Garrett's friend from Greendale College, Jeffrey Winger.
加瑞特在格林德尔的朋友杰夫瑞·翁格
There's a lot of things I can say about this couple.
关于这对新人我有很多话可以说
They're both in my class at Greendale,
他们都是我在格林德尔的学生
and like all my students, I give them till about June.
像其他学生一样上到六月就分了
No, you guys'll be fine forever,
不会啦你俩一定会白头偕老的
as long as Stacy never lets Andi babysit.
只要史黛西别让安迪帮忙看小孩
Or go near a child.
也别让她靠近小孩子
Or be in the same town as a pair of scissors.
或是同住在一个城镇互相伤害
This girl's a wreck.
这姑娘就是个悲剧
He's being too mean.
他太刻薄了
No, he's reading the room.
不他把握住了全场的氛围
Andi was a bummer, they needed this.
安迪是扫把星大家都想看她笑话
Life's about two people merging their lives,
生活就是两个人的生命交织到一起
but that means
这也意味着
two families are leaving here tonight as one.
今晚两家人就要成为一家人了
That's a big deal.
这可是大事
Now my friends and I came here tonight as outsiders,
我和我的朋友今晚虽是局外人
but thanks to some good advice,
但多亏了某人的善意提醒
we spent the night learning about these two clans of outsiders.
我们得以了解这两个并无亲缘的家族
We learned that Garrett's uncle Tony is a photographer.
我们了解到加瑞特的叔叔托尼是摄影师
But Uncle Tony,
但是托尼叔叔
did you know that Stacy's friend Lawrence makes and sells frames?
你知不知道史黛西的朋友劳伦斯是制售相框的
Yeah, look each other up, get some business going.
你们该互相了解了解谈谈生意
Oh, and Garrett's neighbor Dawn loves vintage cars.
还有加瑞特的邻居道恩喜欢古董车
Stacy's chiropractor Susan brought her dad,
史黛西的按♥摩♥师苏珊是跟她父亲一起来的
and guess what?
你猜怎么着
Her dad worked in an automobile factory in the 60s.
她父亲上世纪60年代在汽车制♥造♥厂上班
Yeah, I know, these are the kind of things you learn
我知道只有婚礼上的大恶人
being the biggest jerks at a wedding.
才能了解这样的八卦
Here's another golden nugget in the gravel.
我还有一个猛料要爆
Some of you have worked the dance floor
你们中有人已经和加瑞特的
with Garrett's divine Great Aunt Polly,
美丽姨婆波丽跳过舞了吧
90 years young.
老太太芳龄九十
And some of you chatted with Stacy's Meemaw,
而你们也有人和史黛西的姑婆聊过天
also 90 years young.
老太太也正值九十妙龄
Now, I don't know if they've even met before tonight,
我不知道今晚之前她们两位是否见过
but we did learn
但我们知道的是
that both of them were born in the same town.
两位都出生在同一座城市
Sheridan, Wyoming.
怀俄明州的谢里登
Now Garrett and Stacy,
加瑞特史黛西
would you mind getting them both out here?
你们把两位老人家请出来吧
All right. Yeah!
很好美得很
I know Aunt Polly's here.
我知道波丽姨婆在这里
Isn't she beautiful?
她多美啊
Okay. Who has got eyes on Meemaw?
很好有谁看见姑婆啦
This is Meemaw.
她就是姑婆
Oh, this is Meemaw!
这就是姑婆啊
Okay, I feel like an idiot.
我感觉真是冒傻气
I'm so, so sorry.
真是不好意思
Garrett, where's Aunt Polly?
加瑞特波丽姨婆在哪呢
Okay.
好吧
I, now I don't feel as stupid
这个我有点糊涂了
because either someone here is lying,
是有人说谎了呢
or this family's a lot closer than we thought.
还是两家人比我想象的还亲啊
And now, this is a man
瞧瞧这个人
that knows how to marry his cousin.
有情人终成兄妹啊
None of this would have happened
要不是我总是这么心肠过热
if I wasn't always trying to help.
也就不会有这么一出了
Actually, none of this would have happened
其实要不是我这么热心
if I hadn't tried helping you with your helpfulness.
帮你解决心肠太热的问题也就不会有这样的事了
Oh, don't torture yourself with that logic.
别拿这一套折磨自己了
None of us would have met if Hitler hadn't been born.
要是希♥特♥勒♥没出生我们也不会见面了
Also none of Britta's arguments would have a default analogy.
这样布雷塔的论点里也不会自带糟心比喻了
Excuse me?
你说什么
He's saying you go to the Hitler well a lot.
他是说你开口闭口希♥特♥勒♥
What are you, Hitler, Hitler?
你是希♥特♥勒♥吗你个希♥特♥勒♥
Okay, Britta, we're all the worst right now,
好了布雷塔今天我们都是烂人
take a day off.
你今天省省口舌吧
I did.
我省了啊
Between us ruining the ceremony
今天我们联手毁了结婚典礼
and ruining the reception when we were all just individual people,
结果分开后又各自搅了人家的招待喜宴
I wasn't the worst.
我可算不上是最烂的
I'm only the worst with you guys.
我和你们在一起的时候才最不上道
Well, me too. Me too.
我也是我也是
I was a good dean before you guys.
我没遇见你们的时候可是个好院长
You can't disprove it.
有本事你们反驳啊
I relapsed because of you guys.
我被你们害得旧病复发了
What? Oh it's not a big deal.
什么不是什么大病
White people problems.
关于白人的二三事
I like this group.
我喜欢你们这群人