废柴联盟（2009）

Community S06E03

Part 3 Oct. 19, 2020, 1:10 p.m.

Honestly? I couldn't care less
说实话我一点都不在乎
if they gave a dog a degree.
学校是不是给狗颁了学位
Me neither.
我也是
In fact, I kinda hope they did.
说真的我还希望他们给了
Well, why is that? I don't know.
为什么我也不知道
They all treat me like I'm a joke.
他们都觉得我是个笑话
But if a dog got a degree,
但如果狗都拿到了学位
that means we're all a joke.
那说明我们都不过是个笑话
Natalie is Freezing?
「冰冻娜塔莉」乐队
You know them?
你知道他们
Yeah of course I know them. But how do you?
当然可你怎么会...
You're ... Black?
你... 是黑人吗
No. Old.
不是老了
Oh, I'm sorry. I just meant that,
对不起我的意思是
when I was into them I was like 15.
我可是15岁的时候迷上他们的
I was like 40.
我那会儿40了
I never really listened to music, when I was growing up.
成人后我并不怎么听音乐
I was in my own world,
我沉浸在自己的世界里
but one day at work, I heard this sound.
但有天工作的时候我听到了一段旋律
It was Pillar of Garbage.
是「垃圾之柱」
Oh, that is their best song.
那是他们最棒的歌♥
Best song.
最棒的
I've got it right here.
这里就有
Would you play it? Yeah.
能放放吗好
You know, you know what?
知道不
You know, those guys are going to need coffee
那帮人想要掩盖狗拿学位的事情
if they're going to keep that dog from having a degree.
就一定会需要咖啡的
There are things at, at stake here.
这可是十万火急的
I, I get that now.
我现在明白了
I found the smell.
我闻到一股味儿
Someone filed a taco.
有人把墨西哥卷放档案里了
Things that will otherwise get filed straight to my thighs.
真正需要归档的东西早已成我身上膘
so I know you agree with me that we need to find the truth, but...
我知道你是赞同找出真♥相♥的
Do you agree that the truth won't be horrible?
但你是不是也认为真♥相♥并不可怕
I'm not psychic, Annie,
我又不是灵媒安妮
that's an illusion caused by extreme preparedness.
那是一种极端准备情绪而引发的幻觉
But, what do you hope is true?
那你希望真♥相♥是什么
Oh God no, I never hope.
天啊我从不心怀希望
Hope is pouting in advance.
希望会让你杞人忧天
Hope is faith's richer, bitchier sister.
希望和信仰是姐妹不过更富更贱
Hope is the deformed addict bound incest
希望是特权和恐惧乱♥伦♥所生下的
monster offspring of entitlement and fear.
瘾君子畸形儿
My life results tripled the year I gave up hope
当我放弃希望和手♥机♥上所有的农场游戏后
and every game on my phone that had anything to do with farming.
我的人生成就整整翻了三倍
What's true will be true, Annie.
真的就是真的安妮
Our job is to deal with that truth.
我们的工作就是应对真♥相♥
You sound a little like Jeff.
你的语气有点像杰夫
Jeff said I sound like Abed.
杰夫说我像阿布蒂
I wonder if Britta thinks I sound like Chang.
我在想布雷塔是不是觉得我像昌
I assume Change thinks I sound like
我觉得昌会觉得我像
distant explosions and crying babies.
远方的爆♥炸♥和嚎哭的婴儿
You know, he's unstable, right?
你知道他不太正常对吧
Yep.
没错
Oh, a transcript for Ruffles.
来福的档案
You think that's our guy?
那就是我们要找的狗吗
I do.
是的
Oh my God.
天啊
So many classes.
上了这么多课
See what hope does?
看到心怀希望的后果了吧
Screw you, Frankie!
你讨厌了啦弗兰
I'm sorry, Annie.
我很抱歉安妮
But I don't think you're seeing this for what it is.
但我觉得你还没看到全部
It's a transcript for a dog.
一只狗的档案
A really, really long one!
好厚一本呢
It's proof that Jeff was right.
杰夫是对的
This school has no value.
这所学校毫无价值
Yeah, but this folder has no degree.
但这里没有学位证
Look. What's that?
看什么
Victory.
胜利
You know, within the context of Greendale.
格林德尔式胜利
Would it be better if we. No.
这样会不会好一点不会
Never know until you try.
你不试怎么知道
Never know until I try. What?
我不试都知道什么
I said we're quite a team.
咱们组队真棒
Here's the coffee.
咖啡来了
Let me know if there's anything else I can do to help.
如果还有什么需要我帮忙的尽管说
We could use some fresh eyes on this cut.
你们来给这段视频提提意见
We could?
用得着吗
Has anyone told you you're difficult to work with?
没人跟你说过和你共事真的很不舒服吗
Everyone in your line of work.
你那行的都这么说
This is Ruffles.
这是来福
She'd like you to believe
她迷惑着你
she's a college graduate and a good girl.
让你觉得她是个乖乖的大学毕业生
But Ruffles is anything, but-.
千万别被来福骗了
When Ruffles moved into her neighborhood in 2007,
2007年当来福搬进社区
dead squirrels went up by 17%.
松鼠的死亡率上升了17%
Coincidence?
是巧合吗
Ask this bunny.
问问这只兔兔吧
Ruffles stole cookies from a Girl Scout,
来福还偷过一位女童子军的饼干
impersonated a lobster,
假装成龙虾
has had 27 children with five different fathers,
育有27只狗宝宝分别来自5位父亲
and, according to one local doctor, has worms.
另外据本地医生声称她还携带有寄生虫
Ruffles might claim she doesn't.
也许来福会说自己没干
Ruffles claims a lot of things,
来福干过的事可不止如此
maybe that's why Ruffles once spent time on death row.
没准这就是她有次被关入死囚牢房♥的原因呢
Ruffles, not a lobster,
来福不是小龙虾
not a student, not a good dog.
亦非学子更不是好狗狗
Paid for by Humanity versus Ruffles.
「人类对来福」出资
I originally wanted the voice over to be
我本来是想搞一个
a James roll Jones impersonator,
詹姆斯·琼斯模拟音
but the James Bater impersonator turned out pretty good.
但詹姆斯·贝特的模拟音居然也很不错
I do wish he'd leave, though.
我真希望他已经走人了
You really let that dog have it. Yeah.
你们还真给狗颁学位了对
Which I, I realize, is important now.
现在我认为这一点相当重要了
Is it okay if I crash on-.
我想睡觉可不可以...
Yeah. Yes.
可以行
What are you doing?
你在干什么
Nothing at all.
没干什么
I wouldn't say that.
才不是呢
You just put five huge cans of olives next to me.
你刚刚把五罐橄榄放在我旁边
Just something I felt like doing.
我想做就这么做了呀
This isn't the first time you've done this.
你已经不是第一次做这种事了
I'm really confused by this.
我真被你搞糊涂了
Is it code for something?
这是什么暗号♥吗
I don't know.
不知道
And I don't care.
我也不关心
Jackpot, relative to Greendale.
中头奖了格林德尔的头奖
My God, look at the course load, this dog was an animal.
天瞅瞅这么多课这狗真是畜生出身吗
Most of them were attendance based.
绝大部分课还是要出勤率的
How is this good news?
这算什么好消息
Unpaid library fees, 15 dollars,
图书馆费未付 15美元
diploma withheld until payment remitted.
学位证书暂扣直到偿清欠款
No degree, the commercial's a lie.
学位没发那个广♥告♥是骗人的
I'm gonna call the station right now and have them pull the ad.
我马上打给电台让他们撤掉广♥告♥
Eat crap Ruffles, and not just your own.
去吃屎吧来福不限于吃你自己的哟
Guys, let it go.
大家消停会儿好吗
What are you talking about?
你在说什么啊
The sad truth is that a dog can get a degree here.
事实的悲哀在于一只狗都可以拿到学位
Yeah, but the happy truth is none did.
但让人高兴的事实是没有狗拿到了学位
There's a difference between truth and honesty.
真♥相♥和诚实是有区别的好吗