加州靡情（2007）
Californication S07E02
Part 5
Dec. 1, 2020, 12:22 p.m.
I think my mother's trying to keep us apart.
我觉得妈妈想把我们俩分开
Why do you say that?
为什么
'Cause I think she's afraid she's gonna lose me
我觉得她害怕如果我们更进一步了解对方
if I develop a relationship with you.
她就会失去我
Well, maybe she's just afraid that I'll disappoint you.
或许她只是害怕我会让你失望
That's impossible. You're my father, right?
那不可能 你是我爸爸
You'd never let me down.
你永远不会让我失望
What has she told you about me?
关于我 她还告诉过你什么
Not much.
没什么
Just that she got knocked up
只说她被一个陌生人
by some guy she didn't know very well,
搞大了肚子
a guy who didn't seem like much of a father figure.
那个人看起来不像是做父亲的料
But you know what?
知道吗
You never knew, so I thought maybe you should.
你不知道我的存在 我想你应该知道
I don't know.
我说不好
I never told her I was trying to find you.
我从没告诉她我在找你
I didn't want to hurt her feelings.
我不想让她伤心
But I did my research, and when we moved out here,
但我还是调查了一番 我们搬到这里来后
I knew that was my opportunity to come find you.
我知道找你的机会到了
You know, your mom has done a pretty good job all by herself.
你知道你妈一个人把你养得很好
Yeah, she's pretty cool, don't get me wrong.
是的 别误会 她其实很酷
It's just being raised by a single mom
只不过被单身母亲抚养长大
has made me really fucking weird.
让我有些怪异
I don't even know how to relate to other guys.
我不知道怎么和其他男人沟通
She didn't have any boyfriends around?
她没交过男朋友吗
Some. I'm sure I scared them away.
交过一些 肯定是我把他们吓跑了
Yeah, you're a lot of responsibility.
是的 你带给人很大的压力
You're like a walking boner killer.
有你在 性♥欲♥全无
I don't even know how to deal with girls.
我甚至不知道如何跟女孩相处
I paid this chick one time to take off her top.
有一次我花钱请一个女孩脱掉上衣
She let me jerk off in front of her.
她让我在她面前打手♥枪♥
I finished right on her feet. That's too much.
我射在了她的脚上 别说了
I'm not as cool as you might think. That's too much.
我没你想象的那么酷 求别说
That's enough.
信息量足够了
Look, I need help, Hank. You know what I think?
汉克 我需要帮助 想知道我的想法吗
I think you'd get along famously with your Uncle Charlie.
你肯定能和查理叔叔合得来
Look...
听着
I know this is pretty much the last thing you wanted out of life.
我知道你肯定不希望我出现在你的生命里
I know there's nothing cute or charming
突然出现在你家门前
about me showing up on your doorstep.
也不是什么感动人心的事情
It's just reading about you,
但我读过对你的采访
you seemed like a really cool guy,
你看起来非常屌♥
and I guess I just wanted to get to know you a little bit.
我只是想多了解一下你
I thought maybe some of your cool would rub off on me or something.
或许你的屌♥气可以传给我一点
You want to see where I work?
你想看看我工作的地方吗
Are you kidding me? I'd love to.
你开玩笑吗 我当然想了
That's right, motherfuckers! Die, pigs, die!
没错 傻♥逼♥们 猪头们 去死吧
Leave it! Leave it, leave it, leave it.
淡定 淡定 淡定 淡定
Oh, my God! They have a foosball table here.
天呐 这里还有个桌上足球机
Hank, what the fuck, man?
汉克 你搞毛呢
What? What?
怎么了 怎么了
Your dipshit agent just called me,
你的混♥蛋♥经纪人刚刚打电♥话♥给我
said you were in a car accident.
说你出车祸了
Ah, you can't listen to a word that guy says.
别信那家伙的一个字
He's mentally ill.
他脑子有毛病
I just keep him around so he doesn't blow his brains out.
我留着他 这样他的脑袋才不会爆♥炸♥
I am sorry for getting back late though.
很抱歉回来晚了
Thought maybe you went out for a pack of smokes
还以为你出去抽了几包烟
and decided TV wasn't for you.
决定退出电视圈
What?
什么
That'd be crazy, not to mention unprofessional.
那太疯狂了 还特别不专业
I'm here, I'm queer, get used to it.
我就这样奇葩 习惯就好
I just wanted to show this young man what I do for a living.
我只是想向这位年轻人展示一下我的工作
Oh, is this your kid? Apparently.
他是你儿子吗 显然如此
Is he On the spectrum?
他是不是 有自闭症吗
Probably, but aren't we all?
可能吧 但我们都有啊
Does he want a job?
他想不想来这里工作
Because I just promoted the P.A. to writer's assistant.
我刚刚把我的私人助理提拔为编辑助理
He wanted a reward for cleaning up all that puke.
他把那摊呕吐物打扫干净 想要些奖励
Kids today, you know, they're so fucking entitled.
今天的孩子啊 太他妈追名逐利
Hey, hey, I remember this show.
嘿 我记得这个剧
Oh, yeah, you like that one?
你喜欢它吗
It was awful.
太难看了
Like, really bad. Like, who-writes-that-shit bad.
非常难看 谁能写出这么难看的东西
Just terrible. I write that shit.
可怕至极 是我写的
I created that show.
我是那部剧制片人
Oh, sorry. No, you're right.
对不起 你没错
The show sucked. It sucked hard.
那剧太烂了 简直是坨屎
Never got the casting right.
总是选不到好演员
Much like life, it's all in the fucking casting.
正如生活 全取决于那些操蛋演员
Hank? Oh, my god! Get a load of this cunt.
汉克 天呐 瞧瞧这个大傻♥逼♥
Hank, thank God you're alive.
汉克 幸好你还活在
I guess it was just a fender bender after all.
看来只是小刮小蹭而已
Shut the fuck up, Charlie. Shut the fuck up. What?
闭嘴吧 查理 快闭嘴 怎么了
Oh! Levon!
莱文
Hey, it's Uncle Charlie, remember?
我是查理叔叔 还记得我吗
It's great to see you...
很高兴见到你
Yeah.
好
Will you get a load of that?
快瞧瞧啊
Hank...
汉克
I think it's working. The little blue pill worked.
它起效了 小蓝药片起效了
I think I'm getting hard.
我要硬了
Behave yourself, you animal.
注意点 你个禽兽
Oh, oh, that.
那个啊
Oh, good! Good for you.
真好 你真幸运
Good for you and your thin, veiny dong.
你和你的细长小兄弟都有福了
My heart's beating really fast, Hank.
我的心跳真快 汉克
It's kind of freaking me out. Here, feel.
我有点被吓到了 摸摸我这里
No, I'm not gonna feel anything.
我才不要摸你
It's just an erection. Feel it. Feel.
只是勃起而已 摸摸我 摸摸
You've had a million of them, and you botched them all.
你已经勃过无数次了 但最后都萎了
I'm feeling very dizzy, Hank. Call 911.
我头非常晕 汉克 叫救护车
It's a massive coronary event. No, it's not.
我的冠心病发作了 才没有
Call 911. It's not.
叫救护车 并不是
Call 911! It's a massive coronary event!
叫救护车 我的冠心病发作了
Call 911! Please!
谁来帮忙叫救护车
This is it, Hank. This is it.
绝对是 汉克 绝对是
No, it's not. What's with the boner?
不 并不是 他小兄弟怎么了
Seriously, Hank, you need a new fucking agent.
说真的 汉克 你需要换个经纪人了
He's my manager now. Are you okay?
他就是我的经纪人 你还好吗
Is there anything I could do to help?
我能为你做些什么吗
God, you smell good. Ha, ha.
天 你闻起来真香
Holy shit!
妈♥逼♥
Did he just cum in his pants?
他是不是在裤子里射了
Quit stalking me, lady.
别再跟踪我了 女士
Levon told me where you lived.
莱文告诉了我你的地址
Of course he did.
当然了
He also told me what you did for him.
他还告诉了我你为他做的一切
Oh, yeah, that's just a lowly P.A. Job.
只不过是私人助理而已
He's gonna be cleaning up a lot of puke.
他以后得打扫很多呕吐物呢
Thanks for ignoring everything I said.
谢谢你忽略了我所说的一切
That's what I do.
我就是这样的人
I'm--no, I'm sorry.
我...对不起
No, I mean it. Thank you.
不 我是真心的 谢谢你
Thanks.
谢谢
It's good to see him so excited about something.
很高兴看到他如此兴奋
I'm sorry about earlier.
我为我之前的行为道歉
My defenses were up. Mother bear issues, I guess.
我保护欲太强了 可能有点母熊护崽的心理
No, it's totally understandable.
不 这完全可以理解
This is uncharted territory for both of us.
这对我俩来说都是未知世界
加州靡情（2007）
Californication
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