马男波杰克

BoJack Horseman S01E11

Part 3 Feb. 11, 2020, 1:26 p.m.

那你就得在今晚死去
finish the book, then you'd have to, like, die tonight.
我知道了我该谋杀你
Oh, I know! I should murder you.
我是认真的
I'm serious.
你想啊
Think about it.
如果你在荧幕中抚养长大的小女孩
If the little girl you raised on television
在现实生活中把你杀了
killed you in real life...
大家肯定会超级喜欢的
people would eat that shit up.
我喜欢简直完美这书一定会大卖♥♥
I love it. It's perfect. We'll sell so many books.
对对杀死波杰克
Oh, yeah. Yeah, kill BoJack!
-我要杀了你 -对
- I'm gonna kill you! - Oh, yes!
看招我要杀了你
There it is! Oh, yeah, gonna get you!
不不不...
No, no, no, no...
好了我们学到了什么
Okay, so what did we learn?
我们学到如果要吸毒
We learned that if we're going to do drugs
就应该在自己家里吸这样可以保证安全
we should do them at home where it's safe to do them together,
对吧陶德
right, Todd?
-不 -啊
- No! - Ahh!
别紧张二位
Don't worry, guys.
这把枪是用来对付擅自闯进来的人的
I have this gun to keep us safe from intruders.
-还有彼此 -等等等等
- And each other. - Wait, wait, wait.
你拿的是枪状打火机
Is that just your gun-shaped lighter,
还是打火机状的枪
or your lighter-shaped gun?
被你发现了这只是个打火机而已
Busted! It's just a lighter.
啊
Aah!
操这好像是我的枪
Shit, I guess it's my gun.
那我的打火机哪里去了
Then what'd I do with my lighter?
我给那个婴儿玩的是什么
And what did I give to that baby?
哈哈我也有枪
Ha, I have a gun, too.
别闹了你拿的是把扫帚
Don't be a Silly Billy. That's a broom.
等等我拿的是枪吗
Wait, am I holding a gun?
陶德你拿的是枪还是扫帚
Todd, are you holding a gun or a broom?
我也不知道啊
I can't tell anymore!
那我们就同时朝对方开火
I guess we'll just have to shoot them at each other
看看到底是什么吧
at the same time to find out!
好吧
Okay!
陶德嘘陶德陶德我需要你
Todd, sh... Oh... Can I just say... Todd, Todd, I need you...
我需要你听我说听我说陶德
I need you to shh. Listen, listen, Todd.
我先说明我们朝对方开枪
Okay, just to be totally clear, we're shooting each other
只是为了确定手里拿的是枪还是扫帚对吧
to determine whether we're holding guns or brooms, right?
不是因为我毁了你的摇滚歌♥剧
Not because you're still mad about the whole
毁了你的电影什么之类的
me sabotaging you with the rock opera
你还在生我的气对吧
and your live stream and suchety-such?
波杰克安静安静好吗小波
BoJack, shh, shh, okay, Bo?
安静安静安静安静
Quiet, quiet, quiet, quiet.
你也知道我确实受伤了
As you know, I was hurt,
但是然后我就意识到你就是这样的人
but then I realized that's just how you are.
可能我就是不能期望你
You know, and maybe I just need to stop expecting you
做一个好人
to be a good person,
这样你不是好人的时候我就不会受伤了
so that way, I won't get hurt when you're not.
好好吧
Oh, o... okay.
这不公平
Hey, this isn't fair.
我没有枪
I don't have a gun.
萨拉·琳说得对
Sarah Lynn is right.
如果我们都有枪那就没人需要枪了
You know, if we all had guns, then no one would need a gun,
那样我们就都安全了
and we would all be safe.
天哪
Oh, my God.
我们刚才好像把美国的枪♥支♥问题解决了
I think we just solved the gun crisis in America.
让他们吃枪子儿吧
Let them eat guns!
嘭嘭嘭耶太棒了
Bang, bang, pow, pow, yeah, oh, wow!
我们吸点毒来庆祝吧
Let's celebrate... by taking more drugs.
现在我们再把美国的毒品问题解决掉就好了
Now we just have to solve the drug crisis in America.
很简单我们把毒品都吸光
Easy! We'll take them all.
棒
Yes!
两天后
波杰克
BoJack?
不好意思你没事吧
Hey, sorry. You okay?
没...
Yeah...
听我说我想过了你说得对
Listen, I've thought about it, and you're right.
你的回忆录应该代表你
Your memoir should be a representation of you.
得你满意书中对自己的描述才行
It's only fair you're happy with how you're portrayed.
-真的吗 -真的
- Really? - Yeah.
我想帮你写一本我们都引以为傲的书
And I want to help write a book we can both be proud of.
天哪谢谢你
Oh, my God. Thank you.
谢谢你
Thank you.
-你没事吧 -不
- Are you okay? - Oh, no!
又来
Not this again!
这是怎么回事啊
What is happening!
我煎饼吃太多了
I ate too many pancakes!
操我还在幻觉
Oh, shit, I'm still tripping.
其实刚才不是两天后
只是两分钟后而已
来吻我
Kiss me.
你抛弃了我我永远不会原谅你的
You abandoned me, and I will never forgive you for that.
我是花生花生...
I'm Mr. Peanut... I'm Mr. Peanut...
我是花生酱先生
I'm Mr. Peanutbutter.
天哪
Oh, my God!
搞什么
What?
搞什么...
What the...
好淡定
Whoa! Okay, stay calm.
我现在没有轮廓了没事
I don't have outlines anymore. That's okay.
我和外界没有界限了
There's no boundary between me and space.
这种事确实发生了
This is a thing that happens.
我们该帮他吗
Shouldn't we help him?
不用他喜欢在水里玩
No, he loves treading water.
天哪
Oh... Oh, God.
天哪天哪天哪
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
大家为什么都在笑什么这么好笑
Why is everyone laughing? What's so funny?
卡你给我集中点小波
Cut! Get your head out of your ass, B.J.
你的台词是我就是如此我会永远如此
Your line is, "This is all I am and all I'll ever be."
我就是如此我会永远如此
This is all I am and all I'll ever be.
说得对老头子
You can say that again, old man.
-马马马 -怎么了
- Horse, horse, horse! - What is it?
你可以给我做弟弟酱和妹妹三明治吗
Will you make me a penis butter and va-jelly sandwich?
什么
What?
我说你可以给我做弟弟酱和妹妹三明治吗
I said, make me a penis butter va-jelly sandwich, bitch.
不不
No, no.
不
No?
现在说"不"是不是太晚了波杰克
Well, isn't it too late to say no, BoJack?
这条路是你自己选择的
This is the road you chose.
我在下沉快来帮帮我
I'm sinking, somebody help.
地板变成沥青了
The floor is tar.
你跟我一起来吧来缅因州
Why don't you come with me? Come to Maine.
不行我被困住了
I can't, I'm stuck.
缅因州有粉红莓果吗
Do they have Pinkberry in Maine?
不行
I can't!
-出去 -我不想
- Go out there. - I can't.
这是你说不想就不想的吗
Can't lives in a house on Won't Street.
你不准在整个晚餐俱乐部的人面前让我难堪
You will not embarrass me in front of the entire Supper Club.
我告诉他们你会演唱棒棒糖之歌♥
I told them you were going to sing the "Lollipop" song.
但是我不想唱歌♥
But I don't feel like singing.
没人在乎你的感觉
Nobody gives a damn what you feel.
外面有观众等你呢
You've got an audience out there,
他们想听到你唱歌♥
and they want to hear you sing.
你想让妈妈爱你吗
Now, you want your mommy to love you?
那你就出去做你唯一擅长做的事
You go out there and you do the only thing you're good for,
去唱该死的棒棒糖之歌♥
which is singing the goddamn Lollipop song.
我告诉你
And let me tell you somethin'.
长命不死的秘诀是...
The secret to living forever is...
霍斯曼·碧翠斯之墓
不
Oh, no.
无人惦念的马男波杰克之墓
你有什么问题吗
What seems to be the problem?
求助台每次五美分