马男波杰克

BoJack Horseman S01E04

Part 3 Feb. 11, 2020, 1:25 p.m.

骗我一次他人可耻但骗我两次
"Fool me once, shame on me, but fool me twice...
%￥￥#@@*&
大概就是这样说的吧
I do believe that is the expression.
等等我得接个电♥话♥
Ooh, hold on. I gotta take this.
艾瑞卡我现在没时间和你调情
Erica, I don't have time to be charmed to death right now.
你和花生酱先生约会多久了
So how long have you been dating Mr. Peanutbutter?
你们俩是认真的吗我问这只是为了写文章
Is it serious? I'm only asking for the article.
更好的问题是为嗡食网写篇文章要多久
Better question: How long does it take to write a BuzzFeed article?
我想要文章深入透彻一些
I want to be thorough.
什么戴安戴安戴安戴安
What? Diane, Diane, Diane, Diane!
-你知道今天是什么日子吗 -星期天
- Do you know what today is? - Sunday?
今天是墨西哥餐厅的"比头大墨西哥卷"日
It's "Burritos as big as your head" Day at El Taco Loco!
我们得立刻动身了
We gotta go right now!
我们今天不是要去洛杉矶艺术博物馆
I thought we were going to see the Diane Arbus show
看戴安·阿勃丝的展览吗
at LACMA today.
你知道我多喜欢戴安·阿勃丝的
You know I love Diane Arbus.
我明白了
I see what's happening here.
她叫戴安你也叫戴安
Her name is Diane, and your name is Diane.
不是因为这个
That's not what's happening.
我可以陪你去看阿勃丝的展览戴安
I can go to the Arbus show with you, Diane.
什么
What?
我自己本来也是要去的
I've actually been meaning to go myself.
天呐兄弟你们俩简直是天生一对
Oh, man, you guys are perfect for each other.
你们怎么会分手的
Why did you ever break up?
好吧多吃东西少废话
Okay, less yakking, more snacking.
快走吧
Let's go ride in the car!
你的牛排
Here's your steak.
-抱歉 -哼
- Uh, sorry. - Mm-hmm.
你是要告诉我你有一整年的时间
You mean to tell me that for a full year
都在逃避俄♥罗♥斯♥黑帮的追杀吗
you were on the run from the Russian mafia?
是啊一个俄♥罗♥斯♥黑帮而已
Well, a Russian mafia.
难以置信你从没告诉过我这些
I can't believe you never told me any of this stuff.
我还以为你是个只知道蹭吃蹭喝
I just thought you were a dumb freeloader
整天打游戏的家里蹲死蠢宅呢
who ate all my food and played video games all day.
我高中的时候差不多就这样
You should have seen me in high school.
那时流行过一个游戏疯狂斩首
There was this one game, Decapathon.
我记得那个游戏
I remember that game.
有人提名我演电影版的斩首博士
I was up for Dr. Decapitator in the movie version.
但导演组说要找个形象更忧郁的
They said they wanted someone hipper,
没想到最后选了罗伯特·唐尼
but the part ended up going to Robert Downey.
-小的那个吗 -如果是小的
- Junior? - If it was Junior,
我会说"小"的
I would have said, "Junior."
那游戏毁了我的一生
That game basically destroyed my life.
我被学校退学被女朋友抛弃
I flunked out of school, my girlfriend left me.
直到被老妈赶出家门
I mean, I didn't stop playing
我才停手
until my mom threw me out of the house.
那时我第一次意识到
I mean, that's when I first realized, you know,
我就是个纯废柴
I'm a total screw-up.
你不再是废柴了陶德
You're not a screw-up anymore, Todd.
你的摇滚歌♥剧马上就会大获成功
You're about to have a hit rock opera on your hands.
你这么想我很高兴
I'm really glad you think that.
我让卡洛琳公主请了
I got Princess Carolyn to invite
维吉尔·范·克里夫参加我们的下次彩排
Virgil Van Cleef to our next rehearsal.
范什么来着
Who in the what Van?
维吉尔·范·克里夫是摇滚歌♥剧的超级大牛
Virgil Van Cleef is the biggest name in rock opera.
想想过去二十年间
Okay, think of all the great rock operas
所有最棒的摇滚歌♥剧
from the last 20 years.
好吧
Okay.
他全都有参与
He had a piece of all of them.
陶德你觉得我们准备好了吗
Wow, Todd, are you sure we're ready for that?
是你自己说的我们已经步入正轨了
Hey, you said yourself the train is moving,
但要是你觉得我们还没准备好
but if you think we're not ready,
我就听你的
I mean, I'll listen to you.
你听我的够多了兄弟
Hey, you've done enough listening, buddy.
也该轮到我听你的了
Maybe it's about time I start listening.
我觉得...
Well, I feel like...
我得接这个电♥话♥ 喂
Gotta take this. Hello?
喂是马男波杰克吗
Hello? BoJack Horseman?
我们手头有些很敏感的照片
We have some very delicate pictures you might
你也许不希望它们流入不该看到的人之手
have an interest in not getting into the wrong hands.
我对现在的长途电♥话♥供应商很满意
I am very happy with my current long distance provider,
不用了谢谢
thank you.
什么
What?
不好意思我得挂了我在和朋友吃午饭
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm having lunch with my friend.
你听清楚了没有
But if you just listen...
群演们维吉尔·范·克里夫驾到之后
All right, gang, when Virgil Van Cleef gets here,
都表现得精神点
look alive.
这可能是陶德一夜爆红的机会
This could be Todd's big break,
等会给我使劲鼓掌所有的笑点都要笑
so clap really hard and laugh at all the jokes,
就算不好笑也要笑但请注意
even if they're not funny, but also, be careful,
很多你们以为是笑点的
because a lot of things you might think are jokes
其实不是笑点都给我小心了
are not jokes, so, you know, look out.
-这不是笑点 -我也没真笑
- That was not a joke. - That was not a real laugh.
希望你别介意我带了韦恩来
I hope you don't mind I brought Wayne along.
-韦恩是哪根葱 -正是在下
- Who's Wayne? - I'm Wayne.
我想确保他为我的嗡食网封面头条
I just wanted to make sure he had everything he needs
充分取材
for the big BuzzFeed cover story.
嗡食网是个网站哪来的封面
BuzzFeed is a website. There is no cover.
一回事嘛 "狗狗虎虎"啦
Eh, "Tomato," "Tomato."
是"马马虎虎"好吗
It's "Tomato," "To-mah-to."
你说"马马虎虎"
You say, "Tomato," "To-mah-to,"
我说"狗狗虎虎"不行吗
I say, "Tomato," "Tomato."
戴安我有东西给你
Oh, hey, Diane, I got you something.
机票吗
Oh, plane tickets?
是的去旧金山的机票
Yep, to San Francisco.
阿勃丝的展览下一站就在那里
That's where the Arbus exhibit is heading next.
天呐爱死你了花生酱先生
Oh, my God. Thanks, Mr. Peanutbutter.
各位亲们惊艳我吧
Gentlemen, dazzle me.
你们即将看到的还是草稿很草稿的草稿
What you're about to see is rough, very rough.
这还是一部摇滚歌♥剧的丑小鸭阶段
It's a vomit pass at what might become a rock opera.
目前背景设定主要是在太空
Right now, it's set mostly in space,
不过我们还没确定
but we're not married to that.
陶德不是歌♥手也不是科班出身的音乐家
Todd is neither a singer nor a trained musician.
其实他高中都没毕业
In fact, he never even graduated high school,
这是他私下告诉我的
he told me in confidence.
记住这些让我们掌声欢迎陶德
Keep all that in mind as you give it up for Todd.
让我们回到1887年
Okay, so we start in 1887
故事从小艾玛·戈德曼说起
with a young Emma Goldman.
五小时后
*不他们不能*
*No they couldn-n-n-n't make u-u-u-us*
*奴役我们*
*Sla-a-a-a-a-aves*
第三幕还要加一段重头戏
It needs a third act showstopper.
我深有同感
I had the same note.
不过总体来说非常不错
But in all, it's spellbinding.
太好了
All right!
我在北好莱坞有家小剧场
You know, I run a small theater in North Hollywood.
我们下个月安排了一场
We were supposed to mount a
《耶稣基♥督♥超级巨星》的重演
J.C. Superstar revival next month,
你也知道安德鲁·劳埃德·韦伯的剧
but of course, Andrew Lloyd Webber has to be
到哪都是当红炸子鸡
a real hot penis about everything.
我的安迪骗我一次是你可耻
Oh, Andy. Fool me once, shame on you,
但教会别人怎么骗我
but teach a man to fool me,
那我的余生都要在被骗中度过了
and I'll be fooled for the rest of my life.
话说回来这个剧六周后能首演吗
Anyway, could this show be ready to debut in six weeks?
六周吗天呐应该可以
Six weeks? Uh, damn. Yeah, I guess so.
赞我们会尽快安排一场赞助商展演
Marvelous! We'll schedule an investor showcase posthaste.
现在先喝酒庆祝吧
In the meantime, libations!
-开一瓶怎么样 -太棒了
- Popping, what? - This is great.
当你以为一个人已经没救了的时候
You know, just when you think you have a person pegged,
他还是能让你大吃一惊
he can still find ways to surprise you.
是啊陶德确实华丽逆袭了对吧
Yeah, Todd really rose to the occasion, didn't he?