马男波杰克

BoJack Horseman S01E05

Part 1 Feb. 11, 2020, 1:25 p.m.

神犬巴迪
国际机场
快点啊
Come on!
是因为它吗
Oh, is it this guy?
ABC台感谢您
我出门永远都带着的
Never travel without it.
别堵着队了好吗傻屌♥
Stop holding up the line, idiot!
不能怪他他也是在尽职
It's not his fault. He's just doing his job.
是怪你呆逼
It's your fault, dummy.
抱歉先生不能携带超过三盎司液体上机
I'm sorry, sir, no liquid over three ounces.
这可是派比·范温克朋友
This is Pappy Van Winkle, friend.
你知道这波本酒是什么年份的吗
Do you know how old this bourbon is?
如果它是人
If this was a person,
我一年前就不会跟它上♥床♥了
I would've stopped having sex with it a year ago.
抱歉先生
I'm sorry, sir.
你知道我是谁吗
Do you know who I am?
快点啊
Come on. Ugh!
我是个要去纽约和出版商
I'm actually a huge celebrity on my way to New York
进行重要会面的巨星
for an important meeting with a book publisher,
我要出书因为我是名人
who wants to publish a book about me because I am famous.
-那不是... -好吧你想打架是吗
- That's not... - Fine, you want me to dance?
那我奉陪
I'll dance.
给我十秒钟戴安
Give me ten seconds, Diane.
这家伙就是个法♥西♥斯♥
This guy's being a total Fascist.
戴安
Diane?
-戴安 -我在这波杰克
- Diane? - Over here, BoJack.
你怎么这么快就过去了
How'd you get through so fast?
因为我遵守已经施行超过十年的
I followed the basic requirements for air travel
基本乘机安全要求
that have been in place for over a decade.
真奇怪
Ugh, weird.
先生不管你是谁请...
Sir, whoever you are, please...
真的吗你没听说过我的电视节目吗
Really? You've never heard of my TV show?
你明知我是谁
You know very well who I am.
现在失陪了我要去纽约
And now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to New York.
搞什么啊
Ah, no.
怎么还有
More? Come on!
你猜怎么着可能是这个
Oh, you know what? Could be this.
天呐他有枪
Oh, my God, he's got a gun.
别怕这是个打火机
Relax, it's a lighter.
我能带多少火机油上飞机啊
How much lighter fluid can I take on the plane?
你回答之前记住我是名人
And before you answer, remember, I'm a celebrity.
我们要全身搜查
We're gonna need a full body cavity search.
马男波杰克
第一季第五集
C出版社
企鹅出版社
危险有石棉
即将宣告破产
谢谢你们专程来纽约
Thanks for coming to New York for this.
这么说吧我远离加州一段时间
Let's just say, it's better for everyone's kneecaps
对我们大家的膝盖都有好处
if I stay out of California for a little bit.
换个环境总是好的对不对
Always nice to get a change of scenery, am I right?
我觉得纽约的空气对我有好处
I think the New York air's been good for my health.
我的确长了个肿块
I mean, I did find a lump,
不过有马男波杰克
but hey, who needs health insurance
在替你写书谁还要医保呢
when you've got BoJack Horseman writing a book, huh?
书写得如何了
How's it coming along?
非常好
It's great.
我有好多有趣的轶事
I'm pumping out heartfelt anecdotes
和观察到的生活中的趣事
and witty observations left and right,
这位把它们都变成了精彩好故事
and this one is spinning it all into gold.
您的电♥话♥响了我是爱娜·格拉斯
Your telephone is ringing. I'm Ira Glass.
感谢您成为公共广播电台的出资会员
Thank you for being a sustaining member of public radio.
人人都有故事
Everyone has a story,
而您手♥机♥的故事就是它在响
and your phone's story is that it's ringing.
不好意思喂
Excuse me. Hello?
快回来哦大明星
Hurry back, superstar.
我觉得戴安不行
I don't think Diane's working out.
为什么她不够好吗
What? Why? Is Diane no good?
她太好了
She's too good.
我不知道戴安有没有烂到能写我的故事
I don't know if Diane is damaged enough to tell my story.
她太... 有用了
She's so... functional.
抱歉马男先生
Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Horseman,
她太有用了
she's too functional.
要不我拿起电♥话♥
Why don't I just get on the phone
帮你找个没用的...
and call a less functional...
你在说什么啊
What are you talking about?
现在不是时候波杰克
This is a very bad time, BoJack!
好吧
All right.
你得答应我你的书在♥十♥月♥份
You need to promise me that your book will be on the shelves
就能上架赚钱
and making money by October!
好吧天呐
All right. Jesus.
知道了抱歉去了那么久
Got it. Sorry I took so long.
谁的电♥话♥ 图书馆吗
Who was that? The library?
谢谢你从来没迟还过书吗
Thanking you for never returning a book late?
是我哥哥汤米我爸爸去世了
That was my brother Tommy. My dad just died.
天呐
Oh, my God.
我们确定书的出版时间了吗
Did we talk about firming up the release date?
-我觉得九月底就行 -真的很遗憾
- I was thinking late September. - I am so sorry.
没事的反正他又老又烂
It's fine, he was old and also the worst.
真是悲剧
Such a terrible tragedy
让人开始客观看待事物了
really puts everything in perspective.
那我们的书怎么办
Where does that leave us as far as the book of it all?
没事的
Not a problem.
我就顺便去趟波士顿
I just got to swing by Boston
吊唁一下就好
and give my condolences real quick.
波杰克可以跟我一起
BoJack can come with me.
我们在那也可以写作
We'll get some work done while we're there,
这样我这趟回家
and then that way the whole trip
也不会完全属于浪费时间
won't be a total waste of time.
很好
Great.
有需要的话打给我
Call me if you need anything,
但响一声以后就挂掉
but hang up after one ring,
我会从我和我老婆住所那里的
and I'll call you back from the phone booth
电♥话♥亭给你回电♥话♥
where my wife and I are living.
*陶德保佑这炒蛋*
*Todd bless these scrambled eggs*
*冰箱里的蛋*
*Eggs from the fridge*
*炒得嫩嫩的送它们...*
*Sunny side them and guide them*
陶德别唱你那愚蠢的炒蛋歌♥了
Todd, stop singing your dumb scrambled eggs song.
谁在说话
Who said that?
如果你好奇谁在说话
If you're wondering who said that,
那是你读的便签
it's this note that you're reading.
你听到的是你脑补的我说话声
You're hearing my voice in your head,
因为这就是阅读
because that's how reading works.
是啊
Oh, yeah.
你可能也发现了陶德
As you might've noticed, Todd,
我今天把你独自扔在家
I've left you home alone for the day,
说实话我已经后悔这决定了
and frankly, I already regret that decision.
你要做的就是什么也不干
Here's what you need to do. Nothing.
别碰我东西别弄乱家里
Don't touch my stuff, and don't make a mess.
明天去机场接我
Pick me up at the airport tomorrow,
在那之前什么也别干
and until then, don't do anything.
反正都做了我还是好好玩玩吧
Well, seal's broken. Might as well enjoy myself.
敬泡澡时间
Cheers to bath time.
好故事陶德我喜欢跟你做朋友
Great story, Todd. I love our friendship.
开始啦
Here we go!
伟大的陶迪尼
The great Toddini!
现在到了一位
And here we have the home
真正的天才演员的家
of a truly dynamic and unique talent,
洛杉矶明星之家
电视界的大卫·伯伦纳兹
TV's own David Boreanaz.
听起来这里似乎有
Sounds like we have some fans
《疑犯追踪》的粉丝
of Person of Interest on board,
或者《灵书妙探》或者他演过的什么剧
or Castle, or whatever his show is.
抱歉各位你们来错地方了
Sorry, dudes, you got the wrong house.