马男波杰克

BoJack Horseman S01E09

Part 2 Feb. 11, 2020, 1:26 p.m.

-你好花生酱先生 -服毒陶德
- Hi, Mr. Peanutbutter. - Take the cyanide, Todd.
快服毒
Take the cyanide!
嘿♥咻♥ 嘿♥咻♥
And hup. Hup.
嘿♥咻♥ 不行
And hup... No.
你是来面试当我的司机的吗
Are you here to interview to be my driver?
是的
Um... yes, I am.
太棒了
Brilliant.
我都还没发广♥告♥呢
I didn't even post the ad yet.
这一定是命运使然
Here's me thinking destiny over here.
嘿♥咻♥ 成功了
And hup. Yeah!
感谢你来应聘做我的司机
Thank you for your interest in the role of driver.
我知道你没有带个人简历
I know you don't have your resume with you,
所以你就用我的好了
so I've taken the liberty of letting you use mine.
好啊谢谢
Yeah, thanks.
给你老板
Here, business boss.
让我看看
Let's just have a look here.
个人简历这么棒
Oh, ho, with a resume like this,
你该去雇司机而不是来应聘司机
you should be the one hiring a driver.
开玩笑的
Just kidding.
我知道这是我的简历
I know it's my resume.
但我知道你是西北大学毕业的
But I see you went to Northwestern.
我也是西北大学的
You know, I'm an N.U. man myself.
西北最棒
Go, fighting Westerns.
上面还写到
And it says here you do
你很会模仿罗德尼·丹杰菲尔德
a great Rodney Dangerfield impression.
表演一个来看看
Give us a taste.
好吧
Uh, okay.
"我是罗德尼·丹杰菲尔德"
"I'm Roger Dangerfield."
确实很目中无人
No respect, indeed.
陶德你面试成功了
Todd, you got the job.
你能相信今天天气竟然这么好吗
Can you believe this weather we're having?
不我简直不敢相信今天天气竟然这么好
No, I cannot believe this weather we're having!
我们真是一对好搭档
Oh, wow. We make a great pair.
就像我是黛茜小姐而你是明妮·德瑞弗
It's like I'm Miss Daisy, and you're Minnie Driver.
我好无聊
Hey, I'm bored.
我觉得陶德可能吞食了自杀毒丸
And I think Todd swallowed a cyanide pill
已经身亡
and might be dead.
你想过来玩玩吗
Wanna come over and bang it out?
虽然听起来好像很有趣
Appealing as that sounds,
但我正在和文森特♥共♥进午餐
I have lunch plans with Vincent.
我知道你听到可能会很难过
I know that might be hard for you to hear.
等等你说的是酒吧里那三个男孩子
Wait, that guy from the bar who is actually three boys
叠在一起还套着个军用大衣的那个吗
stacked on top of each other under a trench coat?
千万别嫉妒到发狂哟
Well, don't fly into a jealous rage about it.
嫉妒什么啊
Not jealous.
我只是想提醒你
Just reminding you that you are trying
你想要与之建立恋爱关系的那个人是
to have a relationship with someone who is...
再说一次这是很奇怪的
and again, it's bizarre
我必须指出那是三个小孩子
I should have to point this out... three young boys
叠在一起外面套了件军用大衣
stacked on top of each other under a trench coat.
他会认真听我说话
He listens to me.
好吧但你承不承认...
Okay, okay, but can you just acknowledge that...
承认你是嫉妒了吗
That you are being jealous?
我承认了
Already acknowledged.
回见
Toodles.
-原来你没死啊 -远不止没死呢
- Look who's not dead. - Better than not dead.
站在你面前的是花生酱先生的新司机
You are looking at Mr. Peanutbutter's new driver.
你是他的司机了太棒了
You're his driver? That's perfect.
现在你可以摸进花生酱先生的核心生活圈
Now you can infiltrate Mr. Peanutbutter's inner circle.
我不知道波杰克
I don't know, BoJack.
当然了你得表现得十分友好
Sure, you'll act all friendly,
赢得他的信任跟着他上班
gain his trust, chauffer him around
送他去做美容之类的
on his little errands to the groomer and whatnot,
但同时你也要研究他
but all the while, you'll be studying him,
找出他的弱点
scouring out his weaknesses,
等待时机直到我们准备出手为止
biding your time till we're ready to strike.
一旦你瞄准了他的弱点
And once you zero in on his Achilles' heel,
我们就会打败他
we will take... him... down.
背叛万岁
Hooray. Betrayal.
伙计伙计
Oh, man. Oh, man.
-冷静点陶德 -小伙伴
- Keep it cool, Todd. - Hey, pal.
如果你在自言自语的话
If you're making small talk up there,
不如和我聊聊天吧
how about sending a little my way?
你能相信今天天气竟然这么好吗
Can you believe this weather we're having?
不我简直不能相信今天天气竟然这么好
No, I cannot believe this weather we're having!
周二
你不是应该半小时前
Hey, weren't you supposed to be here
就到的吗
like a half hour ago?
是的我一直坐在我的车里
Yeah, I've just been sitting in my car.
听着我仔细的看了一遍我的笔记
Listen, I was looking over my notes,
我觉得写书的资料已经足够多了
and I think I have enough to go write the book,
所以我要开始写了
so... I'm just going to do that.
你不想再采访我了吗
You don't want to interview me anymore?
你不想知道罗斯巴德是什么吗
But don't you want to know what my Rosebud is?
你一直告诉我那是你叔叔给你看你的裸女杂♥志♥
You told me repeatedly it was the nudie magazine
上面有一个有三个乳♥头♥的女人
your uncle showed you with the three-nippled woman.
-那她是谁呢 -我都知道
- Who was she? - I got it all.
好吧
Oh, okay.
那回见了
Well, I'll see you around though, right?
是的我
Yeah. I, um...
你为什么要让我们之间变得这么尴尬呢波杰克
Why did you have to make things weird, BoJack?
我让我们之间变得尴尬
I made things weird?
如果你看到任何我们
So if you see anything
需要的东西比如说这个饼干加热器
you know we need, like this biscuit warmer,
你就用激光器扫过条形码
you just run the laser over the barcode,
就成了
and kablamsky!
它就会被记录在案了
It goes in the registry.
这样的话大家都知道我想要什么了
And that way, everybody knows what I want.
我知道我想要什么
And I know what I want.
大家想要的就是我想要的
Which is what everyone wants.
很明显
And it's really clear,
大家对此毫无疑问
and nobody's confused about anything.
是我疯了吗还是你确实对这个不感兴趣
Am I crazy, or are you not into this?
并不是只是
No, I am. It's just...
婚礼在楠塔基特岛举♥行♥ 这些礼物
The big wedding in Nantucket, all these presents...
我有点顾不过来了我都来不及想
I'm so overwhelmed, I can barely consider
我是否需要一个饼干加热器了
whether I want or need a biscuit warmer,
我觉得大家最后都是这样放弃了饼干加热器吧
which I think is how people end up with biscuit warmers.
闭上眼睛来吧
Close your eyes. Come on.
想想我们两个人的未来
Okay, picture our lives together.
那是几年后周日一个寒冷的早晨
It's a cold Sunday morning a bunch of years from now.
也许机器人已经占领了地球也许没有
Maybe robots have taken over, maybe they haven't.
我也不知道毕竟那是未来了
I don't know. It's the future.
这个故事和他们并不相关
This story isn't about that.
重点是那是一个周日的早晨
The important thing is it's Sunday morning.
我给你买♥♥报纸给你拿拖鞋
I brought you the paper, fetched your slippers.
你走到厨房♥里你闻到饼干的香味了吗
You come into the kitchen... Can you smell biscuits?
-闻到了 -我也是
- Yes. - So can I.
-他们是不是很温暖 -是的
- Are they warm? - Yeah.
所以才需要饼干加热器啊
Well, that's all a biscuit warmer's for.
听着如果结婚让你压力很大的话
Look, if marriage stresses you out,
我们并不是一定要结婚的
we don't have to get married.
和结婚无关
It's not the marriage.
是婚礼和准备工作
It's the wedding and the year of build-up.
那就别想了
So forget all that.
婚礼的事我都筹划过了
I've done the whole big wedding thing.
我不用再筹划一次
I don't need to do it again.
我们下个月在城里
Let's do something small and casual
就随便一点吧
right here in town next month.
说实话那就太棒了
Honestly, that would be amazing.
但那我们就得取消放飞鸽子的环节