副总统（2012）

Veep S03E04

Part 2 Oct. 12, 2020, 8:08 p.m.

How bad is it? If we were gonna rate
这事有多糟？
it on a scale of one to "fucked",
你看呢？
what would you say?
呃她是个女人
Well, she's a woman.
- 对 - 30来岁的女人
- Right. - In her 30s.
你与她们分♥裂♥ 那你到
You alienate them, and you'll be dead
新罕布♥什♥尔州之前就完了
somewhere before New Hampshire.
哦天哪我知道
Oh, my God, I know.
失去女人我还有什麽？
I lose women and what am I left with?
只有拉丁裔同性恋和大学生犹太人吧我猜
I'm left with gay Latinos and Jews at college, I guess.
拜托谁能告诉我
Does someone please want to tell me
Danny Chung爲什麽在电视上？
why Danny Chung is on this television?
即使Selina Meyer的支持者不再支持她
Even Selina Meyer's supporters are not supporting her.
身爲一个军人
Now, speaking as a military man,
如果你失去
if you lose the trust of the
平民的信任……
men and women on the ground...
我得把这傻♥逼♥灭了
I've got to take this fucker out.
我得完成（伊♥拉♥克♥）共和国卫队未尽的事业
I have to succeed where the Republican Guard failed.
同时干别的一千万件小事
All while doing 10 million other little things.
这叫多任务处理 Dan
It is called "multitasking," Dan.
我每天都……我去
I do it every... Damn it.
你刚把“多任务处理”打出来了是吧？
You just typed the word "multitasking," didn't you?
才不是
No.
对了 Amy 那个水裂女士
Yeah, Amy, "Fracking Lady."
要我带她进来还是让她闭嘴？
Want me to get her in here or shut her down?
你要我怎麽做？
What do you want me to do?
驯服她还是羞辱她？
Tame her or shame her?
都不是都是而且要快
Either. Both. And quickly.
太他妈恐怖了
This is fuckin' terrible.
我知道
I know.
你知道他们说所有婴儿都很可爱
You know, they say all babies are cute,
不管说这话的是谁
but whoever "they" are should be stuck
都该把他们塞到手推车里给车撞
in a stroller and pushed into traffic.
不不我不是说那个
No, no, I'm not talking about that.
Jonah发了新帖
Jonah's got a new post up.
而且有大量点击
And he's getting hits.
还不是他该受的那种击
Not the kind he deserves, either.
副总统去了矽之美女谷哦
So, the Veep's gone to Silicon Valley of the Dolls.
没有让加利福尼亚做梦（歌♥名）,
And instead of California dreaming,
她让加利福尼亚尖叫了
she's got 'em California screaming.
“所以喝化工污水
"And that's why drinking chemical
有益健康 ”
sludge is good for you."
什麽？！
What?!
“可是我一直在喝水力压裂的废水
"But I've been drinking that frack water,
看看它把我的奶水变成啥样了！”
and look what it's gone done to my titty milk!"
“我的宝宝啊我的宝宝！”
"My baby, oh, my baby!"
副总统办公室保密线路
Vice president's office secure line.
Sue Sue姐姐
Sue. Sue-ster.
钢铁之Sue
Sue of steel. Sue-Sue-Sue-dio.
Jonah 给我挂电♥话♥ 然后自挂东南枝
Jonah, get off the line. And then the planet.
你看过我的病毒……
So have you seen my viral...
哦好啊
Oh, nice. Yeah.
是的先生 Kent Davison在3号♥线上
Yes, sir. Kent Davison on line three.
Davison先生？
Mr. Davison?
蛋帅哥还好吗？
Dan-zibar, what's happening?
你看到我的病毒视频了吗？
Have you seen my viral?
Dan 我们得治治这个Cassie婊
Dan, we need to break this Cassie bitch,
那个发明因特网的英国混♥蛋♥
the British dick who invented the Internet,
和他们中间的任何人
and anybody in between.
恩恩 Jonah呢？
Yeah, yeah. What about Jonah?
Jonah？这儿
Jonah? Here.
嘿铅笔脖子傻♥逼♥
Hey, fucking pencil neck.
他吓得吞电♥话♥了
He just swallowed his phone in fear.
听着 Dan 把这事摆平
Look, Dan, fix this.
我马上行动先生
I will get right on it, sir.
然后8点我们去O'Malley's（酒吧）或者10点
Then we hit O'Malley's at 8:00 for a beer or 10.
我想叫Mike的但他
I'd ask Mike, but he's too
结婚结得太开心了
happy now that he's married.
哦谢谢我很期待
Oh, thank you. I look forward to that.
过于开心
Too happy.
很显然我是竞选主管
It's obvious that I would make
的最佳人选
the best campaign manager.
我不是要你跟她吹风
I'm not asking you to tell her that,
但是拜托他妈的来个人告诉她
but please, would someone fuckin' tell her that?
听我的 Dan……
Take it from me, Dan...
干这活干上几个月
in a couple of months on this job,
你的六块腹肌就会变成我这种桶状
you'll go from those six-pack abs to this keg.
第一次海湾战争以后我就没见过自己的小♥弟♥弟♥了
I haven't seen my penis since the first Gulf War,
我还挺想他的
and I kinda miss the little guy.
我是说我知道我有能力
I mean, I know that I can do it.
那你能走到哪一步 Dan Egan？
So how low can you go, Dan Egan?
你愿意做多脏的活？
How down and dirty are you willing to get?
我不怕脏
Pretty grubby.
起码是经常得冲澡的那种没跑
I would definitely need regular showers, for sure.
如果有人告诉你Chung在伊♥拉♥克♥的那个事
If someone brought you this Chung Iraq thing,
你就直接告诉他们
you'd just tell 'em it's
是一团屁话本来就是
fuckin' bullshit, which it is.
Chung在伊♥拉♥克♥的什麽事？
What "Chung Iraq thing"?
你知道Chung把人
You know how Chung just bores
烦出翔的德行吧？
the shit out of you, right?
看起来他在伊♥拉♥克♥时的小队
Well, seems his unit in Iraq
真的在演习里把一个懒鬼？弄出翔了
did that to some poor slob with a drill.
但是你知道只是But that's, you know, just nutfluff.
I mean...
这事不同寻常你不觉得吗？
that's unusable, don't you think?
嗯喂再来两杯
Yeah. Hey, could we get two more?
嗯然后再来两杯威士忌？
Yeah, and a couple of whisky chasers?
星期二还有六分钟才过去
It's still Tuesday for another six minutes.
Mike, I am balls deep in this omelet.
拜托你能把这个叫Cassie的女人
Can you please call this Cassie woman
赶紧请到华盛顿吗？
and invite her to Washington already?
我怎麽就没有好指使的人呢？
How come I don't have a "tell what to do guy"?
Amy? Amy?
你看到那帅哥了吗？
Did you see that hot guy?
没有
No.
他刚从Gary的房♥间出来
He just came out of Gary's room.
- 不会吧 - 正是
- No. - Yeah.
怎麽回事？
What is going on with that?
不是他在另一个房♥间吧
No, he... another room or something.
嘿那是蛋白还是？
Hey, is that egg whites or is it...?
那个？哦是蛋白
That? Well, it's a few egg whites.
对还有西兰花
Right, and some broccoli.
- 要去Clovis了兴奋吗？ - 当然
- You excited about Clovis? - Sure.
女士我要你用最好状态
Ma'am, I want you to bring your
去和Craig Juergensen会面
A-game to the Craig Juergensen meet.
他富得流油能消灭赤字的那种富
He's rich, as in wipe-out-the-deficit rich.
- 他几岁？ - 26.
- How old is he? - 26.
天啊你看这不对
Oh, my God. See, that's wrong.
太年轻了
That's too young.
30岁之前就成爲
No, you shouldn't make your first
百万富翁是不合理的
million until you're in your 30s.
我和Andrew就相反
That's what Andrew and I did.
因此我们才完全靠谱
It kept us completely grounded.
对
Yeah.
哦这个不错啊
Oh, isn't this nice?
可怜的小孩他们还不知道
Poor kids, they don't realize
到三十岁之前
they're all gonna be executed
他们就要通通被处决啦
by the time they turn 30.
哇看看……哦看这儿
Wow, look at... Oh, look here.
副总统女士欢迎来到Clovis
Madam Vice President, welcome to Clovis.
Melissa 真高兴见到你
Melissa. So good to see you.
Melissa Connors 首席财务官
Melissa Connors, chief financial officer.
我比这里最老的人都老五岁