副总统（2012）
Veep S03E02
Part 5
Oct. 12, 2020, 8:08 p.m.
副总统可以接见您了 Cunningham 先生
The vice president will see you now, Mr. Cunningham.
很高兴能见到您
Pleasure to meet you.
如果您需要的话 我还有些免费午餐券
I've got some free lunch passes if you'd like...
听着 我已经在特区工作十年了
Listen. I've worked in DC for 10 years,
但却从来没有被人这样对待过
and I've never been treated like this.
- 把我当成难民一样带我绕圈 - 对不起
- Bundled around like a refugee? - I'm sorry.
我会一如既往的支持你的头头
I'm gonna back your boss, I always have.
- 但是你还是趁早辞职得了 - 我知道了
- But you need to quit this job... - I know.
找一个至少能让你发挥点功用的职位
and find something you're halfway decent at.
谢谢您 真的谢谢您
Thank you. Yeah. Thank you so much.
如果你觉得画面看起来像是 科洛弗档案
If this footage looks kinda like "Cloverfield,"
《科洛弗档案》08年悬疑科幻片 采用僞DV风格的拍摄而成
那你想错了 我只是手在抖
it's not because my hand's shaking,
因爲特区刚他妈经历了一场地震
it's because a fucking earthquake just hit DC!
感觉到新潮流的冲击了吗 你们这些旧媒体
You feeling the heat, Old Media?
因爲现在已经三振
Because it's three strikes and...
你们已经彻底出局
you're out.
告诉他们我过五十秒就来接电♥话♥
Tell them I'm coming in for 50.
The Huffington Post 赫芬顿邮报
- 他们挂断了 - 算了吧 去他妈的河粉屯
- They hung up. - You know what? Fuck HuffPo.
他们应该叫河逼粉
They should be called "Puff Ho"
Arianna Huffington 爲 Huffington Post 主席及责任主编
因爲 Arianna Huffington 就是他妈一个贱逼
'cause Arianna Huffington is a straight-up ho
他们只会满嘴喷粪
and all they do is puff pieces.
MSNBC 美国有线电视台 播报内容以财经及时政类新闻爲主
等一下 MSNBC 发出邀请
Wait... Request from MSNBC.
他们让你上早上7点的节目 还说会派车来
They want you on at 7:00 a.m. They're gonna send a car.
我拿到了
Got it!
距离 早安美国 连线还有三小时
女士 Chung 的声明 十分钟前刚发表
Ma'am, Chung's statement. 10 minutes early.
我从朋友那边拉了点人情
Pulled a few strings from my buddies down at...
快跟我们讲讲都是什麽人情 然后别告诉我们 Chung 的声明稿内容
Please tell us about the strings, Mike, don't tell us what's in it.
反讽 对于一个可能成爲竞选幕僚长的人
Oh, sarcasm. That's an interesting strategy
你这策略可真不错
for a potential campaign manager, Amy.
我道歉 收回我的话
Apologies. Rewind.
快他妈说重点 Mike Amy 说得有道理
Get the fuck on with it, Mike. She's got a point.
对不起 刚打印出来 还没来得及看呢
Oh, sorry. Just printed it. Haven't read it.
我本来想边跑边读 结果发现我做不到
Literally was trying to read it when I was running, so I couldn't do either.
好了 现在看一下 首先请容我赞赏一下总统的立场
Okay, here we go. "First let me say I commend the president's clarity..."
跳过这段
Skip that part.
日新月益的科技给我们带了道德上的难题
"Advances in science have brought us to a moral conundrum..."
我相信孕期22周时堕胎是合宜的
"I believe a 22-week cutoff is appropriate."
之前有人提起过22周这个数字吗
Has anyone ever come up with that number before?
从来没有
Never.
我们得找个再大点的西瓜
We're going to need a bigger melon.
Dan 说得没错 我必须得选出个周数
Dan was right. I've got to pick a number.
很显然随便胡谄一个数字都可以
Okay, well, obviously we can just go anywhere now
只要不超过40周的怀孕周期就行
without going over 40.
半周怎麽样 22周半
Half weeks? 22 and a half weeks.
22周半 听起来像是黄色恐怖片的名字
"22 and a half weeks" sounds like an erotic thriller
- 按天数算怎麽样 - 对 像140天之类的
- What about days? - Yes, like 140 days.
- 换算成周的话 - 用7除一下就可以了 Mike
- Which is in weeks...? - Divide by seven, Mike.
- 两 - 是20周
- Two... - 20.
我现在不能再选24周了
I can't stick to 24 weeks now
因爲那样会让我看起来不仅很自♥由♥主义
because that's gonna make me the most liberal
还会让人觉得我很女性化
and the most female.
全是那个无情的 Chung 害到了我们
"Chung the Merciless" did this, right?
要不然我们给他来个正面返击 跟他选一样的周数好了
Why don't we double bluff him? Just choose the same number.
这又不像是同用一支牙刷
It's not like sharing a toothbrush.
抄袭鬼 Selina 他们可能会这麽说
Mm-mm. "Copycat Selina." That's what they'll say.
Meyer 附议大♥师♥ 脑壳装大便
"Me-Too Meyer," "Shit for Brains..."
不对 对不起 他们不会这麽说的 我真的很累了
No, I'm sorry, they won't say that. I'm just really tired.
那我们要不要全都马上辞职回家睡觉呢 因爲你真的好累
Should we all quit and go home and go to bed 'cause you're so tired?
哦不行 因爲我明天还要去参加
Oh, no, we can't. Because I have to go do
早安美国 这全都多亏你 Kent
"Good Morning America" thanks to you, Kent.
我知道 我很抱歉 女士 我以爲你能抢到最先的话语权
I know, I'm sorry, ma'am. I thought you could be first on air.
没想到 Chung 和 Maddox 喜欢搞半夜突袭
I didn't realize that Chung and Maddox would attack at night.
一定跟他们军队出身有关
Must be the military training.
让我看看 这里这条是什麽意思
Let me see this. What is this spike right here?
那些没想法的人
The "I Don't Knows."
好吧 所以我现在正在看
Okay, so I am looking at a page
一个文件 然后看到大部份美国人
and I am seeing most of America
自豪地挺胸擡头
standing up proudly
说着 我不知道
and saying, "I don't know."
我们自己也吓到了
We were shocked ourselves.
我在想那我下次
I wonder who should be
竞选的策略该是什麽呢
my campaign strategist in the next election.
我不知道
"I don't know."
我一定会用尽全力来让您相信我
I will redouble my efforts to win your support.
这孙子已经深深地爱上我了
The man's obsessed with me.
不然再把您在书里写的内容拿出来重新发一个声明
Issue a version of what you said in the book...
不过要润色得比 Dan 写得好一点
just better than what Dan wrote.
好的 Mike 你马上起草一份新的
Okay, Mike, you draft me a new version
代表我立场的声明稿
of my existing position, okay?
- 好主意 - 对了 我还要找件衣服来穿
- Love it. - And I'm gonna need something to wear,
因爲我马上就要上 早安美国 的连线了
'cause I'm going on "Good Morning America."
粉色吧 我帮您搭粉色系 粉色就对了
Pink. I got you pink. Let's do pink.
gdfadff副 总 统 M E Y E R 腹 背 受 敌sfgsfgkd
关 于 堕 胎 相 关 议 题 分 歧 加 剧sffg
我相信生命是宝贵的
I believe that life is precious.
我也知道自♥由♥得来不易
And so are the hard-won freedoms
因爲现时美国的妇女们正在享受着生命和自♥由♥
that women throughout America enjoy today.
身爲一名女性
As a woman myself,
关 于 堕 胎 相 关 议 题 分 歧 加 剧sffg
gdfadff副 总 统 M E Y E R 腹 背 受 敌sfgsfgkd
我深知自♥由♥就是自♥由♥地...
I know that freedom means the freedom...
谢谢你 先生
Thank you, sir.
MSNBC 新闻录影棚
你把车上送的水全都带上了吗
Did you get all the free water from the car?
- 必须的 - 不错嘛
- Oh, yeah. - Nice.
看吧 我就跟你说了 我们才上线两天就成大人物了
See, I told you, man. Two days up and we're already big.
这就是所谓的天时地利人和
This is what happens when talent meets opportunity.
现在我们就大胆开干吧
Let's blow this thing wide open.
- 嘿 傻 Jo - Dan 你♥他♥妈♥跑这儿来干嘛
- Hey, Jo-nad. - Dan, what the fuck are you doing here?
你真不该在推特里添加定位标记 让想杀你的人知道你在哪里
You shouldn't tweet your location to someone who wants to kill you.
原来你真的有关注我呀
Oh, so you do follow me.
你知道吗 我对天发誓 我要把你的肠子
You know what? I swear to God, I'm gonna rip your guts out
从你那根又小又萎的狗鸡♥巴♥里拉出来
through your tiny, shriveled, little chihuahua cock.
干嘛 别傻站着 你就这样让你的老板受人凌♥辱♥吗
What, nothing? You're gonna let your boss get pasted?
你才不是我老板 我们是同事
You're not my boss. We're copartners.
我他妈可管不着
I don't give a fuck.
你看起来很饿嘛 Jonah
You're looking kinda hungry, Jonah.
想来张卷饼吃一吃吗
You want some of that burrito?
不想吗 嘿 就是你 丑女贝蒂 把卷饼给我
No? Hey, you, "Ugly Betty," give me that burrito.
他说给你就给吗 伙计
Don't just give it to him, dude.
看到了吗 Jonah 这就是你
You see this, Jonah? This is what happens
敢搞我们的下场
when you fuck with my office.
如果你敢在节目上说任何关于副总统的话
If you say anything on-air about the Veep,
我就打烂你的腿骨
I will break your legs so severely,
让你变成一个矮挫子
you'll end up normal height.
随便你怎麽做 Dan
Joke's on you, Dan,
我就是他妈爱吃卷饼
because I fucking love burritos.
是吗 祝你访谈愉快 衰哥
Yeah? Good luck with your interview, handsome.
- 没错 快滚吧 婊♥子♥ - 你说什麽
- That's right, walk away, bitch. - What did you say?
没什麽 什麽都没说
Nothing, nothing.
今天到场的嘉宾是 Jonah Ryan
Joining us in studio is Jonah Ryan.
他之前在白宫任职当副总统的连络员
He was the former White House liaison to the vice president.
- 很高兴见到你 Jonah - 你好
- Hi, Jonah. Nice to see you. - Hello.
你觉得接下来事情会如何发展
What do you think is gonna happen here?
副总统究竟是会同意总统的观点
Will the Veep go with POTUS,
又或者这次她终于会表达出不一样的立场
or could this really be a defining moment for her?
呃 在 Ryantology.net 我们有一个说法
Well, at "Ryantology.net," we have a saying...
也就说是说这些议题很像是一个棱镜
which is that these issues are like a prism.
可以有很多不同的层面
They have many sides.
那你有自己的立场吗
Would you care to pick one?
副总统（2012）
Veep
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