天才阿公（2013）
Uncle Grandpa
第一季
剧集 | 天才阿公（2013） | 导航列表
天才阿公（2013）
Uncle Grandpa S01E41
Part 1
May 3, 2023, 9:03 p.m.
早安
Good morning!
早安
Good morning.
早安
Good morning.
早安
Good morning.
早安
Good morning!
天才叔公
圣诞特辑
我们爱制♥造♥玩具
We love making toys
圣诞老人工厂
在北极
at the North Pole
送给世界各地孩子们
For children all around the world
目标很唯一
that's our only goal
要加紧工作 老人出发早
We have to work fast, Santa's leaving soon
他必须把礼物送出去
He must deliver all the presents
快看这汤勺
Look at this spoon!
我在制♥作♥清单 多次做检查
I'm making my list and checking it twice
滴滴哩滴 嘟滴滴哒
Twee diddly dee, do dippity dice
圣诞佳节到
Christmas time is here --
我的腿
My leg!
我的老天啊
My goodness gracious!
太糟了 真是太糟了
This is bad. This is very bad.
再过三小时就是圣诞节了
Christmas is in three hours!
我们该怎么办
What are we gonna do?!
披萨史蒂夫
Hey, Pizza Steve
能不能请你帮我挂圣诞彩灯吗
mind giving me a hand with these Christmas lights?
抱歉 兄弟
Sorry, bro.
我这边装饰圣诞树忙得很
Really busy decorating the Christmas tree over here.
天才叔公
Uncle Grandpa
你能帮我挂彩灯吗
can you give me a hand with these lights?
绝对不帮 格斯先生
Absolutely not, Mr. Gus!
我不过圣诞节
I don't celebrate Christmas.
真的吗
Really?
那你怎么穿着圣诞毛衣
Then why are you wearing that Christmas sweater?
我爱圣诞节
我还以为上面写的是酪干
I thought it said "cheese mash."
无所谓 我还是恨圣诞节
Doesn't matter. I still hate Christmas!
那圣诞老人呢
What about Santa Claus?
人人都爱圣诞老人
Everybody loves Santa Claus.
跟你们说 圣诞老人是个大疯子
You know what? Santa is a crazy person!
他就是个怪老头
He's a creepy old man
满世界到处飞
who flies around the world
闯进孩子们家里
breaking into children's homes
还说要让他们“快乐”
and claiming to make them "happy."
依我看全都傻得很
That's all pretty stupid if you ask me.
运气真好 等等 我这是在哪
That was lucky. Wait. Where am I?
圣诞快乐
Merry Christmas?
不 别笑了
No! Stop laughing!
他来这干什么
What is he doing here?
我才不是自愿来这的
Well, I actually wouldn't have come here by choice.
哥哥
Brother.
等等 什么
Wait. What?!
等会再给我发短♥信♥ 好吗宝贝
Text me later, "K," babe?
刚给她留了个假电♥话♥
Gave her a fake number.
那 我错过了啥
So...what I miss?
天才叔公跟圣诞老人是亲兄弟
Uncle Grandpa and Santa are brothers!
说什么
Say what?!
是啊 你们难道看不出我们哪像吗
Yeah! You guys never saw the resemblance?
可要是圣诞老人是你哥
But if Santa Claus is your brother
那你为什么又恨圣诞节
then why do you hate Christmas?
因为我一年当中就这么一天
Because it's the one time of year
会让我想起我的讨厌老哥
that reminds me of my lousy brother
他让我感觉傻得很
who likes to make me feel dumb.
那是因为你才傻
That's because you are dumb.
你就只会搞砸事情
All you ever do is mess things up
就跟那天一样
just like that one day.
把话收回去 都是你的错
Take that back! That was your fault.
不是我的错
It wasn't my fault!
你就一笨蛋 每次都这样
You are such a dunderhead! You do this every time!
直接切到回忆片段
Let's just cut to a flashback
让我们自己看
so we can all see for ourselves.
那是1983年
The year was 1983.
我整个夏天
I spent all summer
都在写作并编排一场说唱节目
writing and choreographing a rap routine
才艺时间
准备到美国才艺时间海选赛表演
to perform at the USA Talent Time celebrity search.
哟哟哟 我是说唱叔公
Yo, yo, yo, I'm a rappin' grandpa
唱唱唱 还有那位公公
Rappy, rap, rap, and a slappity doodah
我是圣诞老人 说唱有能力
I'm Santa Claus, I'm a rappin' kind of guy
快看天才叔公 样子特帅气
Check out Uncle Grandpa, he's lookin' really fly
现在滑到右边 朝膝盖眨眼
Now slide to the right, wink at your knee
把锁撬开 如果你想
Do the lock-pick if you wanna --
小心点
Watch it!
现在转个圈 空中旋
Now you do a little turn, make a little spin
把你的胳膊晃啊晃
Swing your arms 'round and 'round --
好你个叔公 给我注意点
Come on, Uncle Grandpa! Pay attention!
趴到地面上 扭动身体
Now you drop to the floor and wiggle all around
跳虫虫舞蹈 如果要下
Do the slimy worm if you wanna get dow--
那个人的脑袋没有脑子
There's no brain inside that head
因为你压根就没法思考
'Cause you can't think straight
赶快握紧拳头 冲脸上来一拳
So you make a hard fist and punch yourself in the face
这样你就出洋相 全怪你笨手笨脚
Now you look real foolish from bein' so clumsy
拿出一把大锤 傻傻敲你脸
So you pull out a mallet and smash your face like a dummy
想必你肚子饿 就去吃轮胎
I guess you're feelin' hungry, so you eat a car tire
我没写那样的歌♥词
Those aren't the lyrics I wrote.
然后你在台上跑来跑去
Then you run around onstage
因为你以为你鞋着火了
'cause you think your shoe is on fire!
什么
What?!
要我继续吗
Need I go on?!
圣诞老人给我留了多年的创伤
I was scarred for years because of Santa
于是每当有人提到圣诞节
and whenever anyone mentions Christmas
我耳边就只洋溢着快活的笑声
all I hear is laughter.
别再老是扯兄弟创伤的事情了
Give me a break with that "tortured sibling" routine.
不好 圣诞节到了 我们该怎么办
Oh, no! It's Christmas! What are we gonna do?
谁才能把礼物全都送出去
Who's gonna deliver all of our presents?!
叔公
Hey, Uncle G
有只精灵刚刚说
one of the elves was just saying
小孩子都会留牛奶跟饼干给圣诞老人
how kids are always leaving milk and cookies
out for Santa.
要是我们接了送礼的活
If we volunteer
那样咱就有不少免费牛奶跟饼干了
that's like a lot of free milk and cookies for us.
顺便还能帮到我的忘恩负义哥哥
And help my ungrateful brother
还有这些恶心小怪物
and these disgusting little freaks?!
算了吧 披萨史蒂夫 我坚决反对
Forget it, Pizza Steve. I'm putting my foot down.
哟 格斯先生
Yo, Mr. Gus.
你怎么不发表一下意见
Why don't you weigh in on this?
是啊 快上来 别害羞
Yeah, get up here, buddy. Don't be shy.
上面还有不少空位
There's plenty of room.
能不能别吵
Do you mind?!
我们要在这开私密会议
We're trying to have a private meeting here.
你觉得如何 格斯先生
What do you think, Mr. Gus?
我们应该暂时替一下我的坏哥哥
Should we fill in for my meanie brother
把这些礼物送出去吗
and deliver all these presents or what?
好啊 有啥不行
Sure. Why not?
你可喜欢帮孩子们的忙了
You do like helping kids.
你说得对 我可喜欢帮孩子们了
You're right! I do like helping kids!
可我不♥穿♥那套可笑衣服
But I'm not wearing that ridiculous outfit.
我想到有更好的东西可以穿
I have something much better in mind.
真不敢相信非得穿这套破衣服
I can't believe we have to wear these dumb costumes.
你们怎么看
Well, what do you guys think?
所有装备用来高效送礼物百分百实用
Everything is 100% practical
for efficient present-delivering purposes.
你脸上是粘了棉球吗
Are those cotton balls glued to your face?
对 还有这些超长指甲
Yeah, and these extra-long fingernails
可以帮助握紧礼物
天才阿公（2013）
Uncle Grandpa
剧集 | 天才阿公（2013） | 导航列表