金色年代

The Goldbergs S08E14

Part 1 April 19, 2021, 5:48 p.m.

80年代的时候
Back in the '80s,
日间谈话节目非常盛行
daytime talk shows reigned supreme,
从多纳休到琼·里弗斯再到热拉尔多
from Donahue to Joan Rivers, to Geraldo.
美国人喜欢低风险的闹剧和高风险的打架
Americans ate up the low-stakes drama and high-stakes fights.
而巴里和杰夫最爱的午间电视女皇
And for Barry and Geoff, their queen of afternoon TV
则是费城传奇人物南希·格拉斯
was Philly legend Nancy Glass.
跟我说一下你是如何和一个性♥爱♥娃娃
Explain to me how you find yourself
开展一段恋爱关系的
in a relationship with a sex doll.
太可悲了
Pathetic.
这傻子找不到真爱就要娶一个哇哇吗
This fool can't find real love, so he wants to marry a doll?
南希永远知道如何回应
Nancy always knows what to say,
这个情况下应该说你不能娶一个娃娃啊
which in this case is, "You can't marry a doll!"
这娃娃都不那么好看
That doll's not even that attractive.
相信我我那时候可是看过好看的娃娃的
Believe me. I've seen some gorgeous dolls in my time.
巴里和杰夫是超级粉丝
Barry and Geoff were superfans,
唯一比在电视上看南希更美好的事情
and the only thing that could be better
就是去现场看秀了
than watching Nancy on TV would be seeing her show live.
还记得我爸先把那人搞失明了
Okay. Remember when my dad cured that guy's blindness,
然后又给他治好了吗
after first causing that guy's blindness?
他失明的时候嗅觉变得超级灵敏
While he was sightless, he developed a super sense of smell.
所以他才闻出了他家墙上的致命霉菌
Which is how he sniffed out the killer mold that was growing in his walls.
你♥爸♥平平无奇的工作表现救了那人一命呢
Your dad saved that man's life by being so-so at his job.
然后呢
Blowing right by all of that...
那人的儿子是在南希·格拉斯那边上班的
So, that guy's son works for Nancy Glass,
他给了我两张票
and he gave me two tickets!
去看南希现场的票吗真的吗
Tickets to see Nancy live? Is this really happening?
真的呢
It's happening, all right.
艾丽卡
Erica...
你愿意跟我一起去看南希·格拉斯吗
...will you go see Nancy Glass with me?
愿意愿意当然愿意
Yes! Yes! A thousand times yes!
我得孩子要成为日间谈话节目的观众了
Oh! My baby's gonna be in the audience of a daytime talk show!
这可是所有妈妈的梦想啊
That's every mama's dream.
得好好计划一下你穿什么
We got to plan your outfit.
我要是能上电视那就要肌肤最大程度的曝光率
If I'm gonna be on TV, I want maximum skin exposure,
我要穿最正式的比基尼
so I need to find my most formal bikini.
我孩子要夺取全场的目光焦点了
My child's gonna steal focus from the freak show onstage!
你随便带一个姑娘都不带我吗
You're taking that random girl over me?
- 巴里 - 别叫我
Barry ...n't "Barry" me.
你每次都选艾丽卡我受够了
You're always choosing Erica, and I'm sick of it!
男女朋友就是要一起做特别的事情啊
Boyfriends and girlfriends do special things together.
最好的朋友不行吗
And best friends don't?
她往我脖子上吹气我会晕乎的
She breathes on my neck and makes me dizzy.
我也口臭
My breath smells bad, too.
她的拥抱满满当当
Her hugs are full-body.
大甜甜的拥抱也是满满当当的
Big Tasty's hugs are also full-body.
- 来证明一下 - 求不要
-Here's proof. -Oh, please don't.
- 让我们的身体合二为一吧 - 还是不要了吧
-Let our bodies become one. -Oh, I prefer them as two.
没错把你好朋友巴里当一件温暖的大衣穿起来吧
That's right. Wear your friend Barry like a big, warm coat.
I'm twisted up inside
But nonetheless I feel the need to say
I don't know the future
But the past keeps getting clearer every day
那是198几年的3月24号♥
It was March 24th, 1980-something,
我女朋友布里亚要去大学
and my girlfriend, Brea, was off
看她的表亲了
to visit her cousin at college,
对于青少年情侣来说很不容易
which for two teens in love, wasn't easy.
我们整整三天
I can't believe we're not gonna see each other
都要见不到面了呢
for three whole days.
我们都没分开过那么久
We've never been apart that long.
你走之前最后一吻吧
One last kiss before you go?
- 好的啊 - 老妈
-Hell, yes! -Mom!
抱歉大宝你有点斜眼
Sorry, Schmoo. You've got that lazy eye.
我不知道你在跟谁讲话
It wasn't clear who you were talking to.
这样你就会知道了永远不是你啊
Here's a fun way to know the difference... It's never you!
那就之后再亲吧
We'll just save that kiss for later.
- 爱你 - 我也爱你哦
-Okay. Love you. -Love you too.
抱歉一直看到你的眼神
Sorry. The eye keeps finding me.
那布里亚要去哪里啊
So, where's Brea off to, kiddo?
去弗吉尼亚大学看她表亲
Visiting her cousin at the University of Virginia.
等下
Hold on.
你居然让布里亚去一个
You're letting Brea visit a college
梅森-迪克森线以南
south of the Mason-Dixon line,
整个州里面以适宜恋爱著称的大学吗
in a state that's famously "for lovers"?
她不是去看学校是去看亲戚
She's not visiting the school. She's visiting her cousin.
这种就会成为真正的大学参观了
Cousin visits are gateways to actual college visits.
上一秒还是我们的妈妈是姐妹哦
One minute, you're all, "Yay! Our moms are sisters."
下一秒就变成了不错
And then, the next minute, "Mmm, yeah.
我可以在这里上四年大学
"I think I could spend four years here."
你想说什么
Where are you going with this?
我知道我肯定问了会后悔的
Is a question I'm sure I'll regret asking.
等布里亚走过弗吉尼亚大学圆形大厅的柱子
Once Brea strolls past the columns of the UVA Rotunda
然后在蒙蒂塞洛湖畔野餐过后
and then picnics next to the waters of Lake Monticello,
她就会爱上那里的
she will fall in love with the place.
你怎么对这大学知道的这么详细啊
Where is all this specific UVA information coming from?
你和布里亚聊过大学的计划吗
Have you and Brea even talked about your college plans?
一点吧我们都要申请纽约大学呢
A little. We're both applying to NYU.
所以你明确跟她说了
So you explicitly told her
你想跟她上同一所大学
that you wanted to go to school together?
等我们都被录取了再说啊
No, but we'll have that talk once we both get in.
然后一切就顺其自然了
Then everything will be hunky-dory.
你是说一切都要鸡飞蛋打了吧
You mean, hunky dog [BLEEP]!
你在大苹果之城打不到车
While you're in the Big Apple yelling at taxis,
然后她看着不♥穿♥上衣的铁匠打马蹄铁
she'll be watching a shirtless blacksmith
然后大喊我愿意
making horseshoes while saying, "Oh, I do declare."
不♥穿♥上衣的铁匠
Shirtless blacksmith?
至少玩火的时候
At least he should be wearing a leather apron
也应该穿皮围裙啊
while working the flame.
不要再给我洗♥脑♥了
A-And stop trying to get in my head.
有句格言叫做
There's a famous saying...
如果你爱一个人永远不要放他自♥由♥
"If you love someone, never set them free."
才不是这么说的
That's not the saying.
老默帮帮忙啦
Murray, a little help?
不她说的挺好的
Nah. Sounds like she's doing a thing.
亚当还有谁比我更了解女人啊
Adam, who knows ladies better than me?
我还在左右逢源呢
I'm still scoring left and right.
我都快支撑不住了
It's honestly too much.
- 恶 - 真的很恶
-Ew. -So much "ew."
我是怎么得到这么多甜蜜的恶心的呢
And how do I get all that sweet ew?
自信啊
Confidence!
让布里亚·碧做自己就好了
Let Brea Bee be.
等她回来再聊未来呗
You can talk about the future when she gets back.
- 我同意姥爷说的 - 我靠老头儿
-I'm going with Pops. -Damn it, old man!
真的吗一般大家都假装听我讲话
Really? Usually, people just pretend to listen to me
然后还是该干嘛干嘛
and then do whatever they want.
我连听都不听呢
I don't even do the listening part.
老爷我百分百相信你
Pops, I trust you completely.
说到女人你可是专家
When it comes to dames, you know your stuff.
老子风范不减当年啊
Look who's back, baby!
腰疼了
Argh! I hurt my back.
当姥爷帮我说通布里亚的事情的时候
While Pops was helping me with Brea,
巴里去JTP寻求杰夫方面的帮助了
Barry was looking for help with Geoff from the JTP.
- JTP - JTP
-JTP! -JTP!
只有你吗马特·布拉德利
Wait. It's just you, Matt Bradley?
- 你进来的时候只有我 - 裸男鲍勃呢
It was just me -when you came in. -Where's Naked Rob?
要做膝盖手术了
He's getting his knee surgery.
终于可以走路不疼了
He'll finally be able to walk without pain.
安迪呢我猜猜
What about Andy? Let me guess.
- 增高手术去了 - 差不多
-Height surgery. -Close.
他去瑞典交换学习一学期
He's on a semester abroad in Sweden.
那些金发巨人会想把他塞进兜里的
Those giant blond people will try to put him in their pockets.
- 没准我可以帮忙啊 - 太没准了不过试试吧
-Maybe I can help. -Mmm, it's a big "maybe," but here goes.
你也知道的我和杰夫作为好兄弟
As you know, one of the things Geoff and I share