老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S09E13
Part 2
Oct. 22, 2020, 1:55 p.m.
and if you climb up...
如果爬上去
La la la la la, I'm not listening!
我不听 我不听
I love Barney,
我爱巴尼
but I'm not going to jail for him.
但我不会为了他去坐牢
What? Really? Why not?
什么 为什么不会
I'd go to jail for you.
我就会为你坐牢啊
No, you wouldn't. Yes, I would.
你不会的 我会啊
Going to jail for your best friend?
为了最好的朋友蹲监狱
That's the dream.
这简直是梦想啊
Really?
是吗
That's the dream?
你梦想就是这个吗
Yeah, it's the most noble-- nay, bro-ble--thing
这超级够义气 不 是够"兄"气
a bro can do for a fellow bro.
做兄弟能做到这份上
So yes, Ted, that's the dream.
所以泰德 这就是梦想
You're too liberal with the phrase "That's the dream."
这句"这就是梦想" 你已经说过无数遍了
Name one other time I've said that!
我什么时候说过了
A suit made of prosciutto so you can eat your way naked,
一套意大利火腿做的西服可以直接吃"光"
"That's the dream."
"这就是梦想"
A pack of lions fighting a tyrannosaurus,
如果能看到狮群和霸王龙相斗
"That's the dream."
"这就是梦想"
Being able to take a whole year's worth of dumps
如果能够二十四小时不间歇地拉屎
in one, nonstop 24-hour period
一次性把一年的屎粑粑都拉完
then not having to dump again for the rest of the year,
一年之内再也不用拉了
"That's the dream."
"这就是梦想"
I never said dump day was the dream.
我从未说过"拉屎一日"是梦想
I said science is this close to a pill.
我只说科学差一点就能研发出这种药
There can only be one "the dream"!
人的梦想只能有一个
You're saying it's going to jail for a bro?
你说你的梦想是为朋友坐牢
You're comfortable with that being
你确定你一辈子
the one and only dream, forever?
就只有这一个梦想吗
Yes.
对
Great, now you can never use that phrase again.
太好了 你以后再也不能说这句话了
And for me, that's the dream.
对我而言 这就是我的梦想
Hey, Lily, Robin just told me about Italy!
莉莉 罗宾刚跟我说了意大利的事
Oh, yeah, it's gonna be great.
是啊 要是能去就好了
Well, that is, if I can convince my husband
前提是 我得说服我老公
to keep his promise and move there with me.
信守承诺 跟我一起搬去那里
Robin, I know you told me you want Marshall to win,
罗宾 虽然你跟我说你支持马修
but I don't know.
可是我觉得吧
I gotta side with Lily on this one.
我比较支持莉莉
Later, skaters.
回见 宝贝们
Thanks again for saving us.
谢谢你救了我们
Well, I don't normally stop like that,
我通常不会这样做
but I just had to for the cutest hitchhiker in the world!
不过这次想要搭便车的人太可爱了
Thank you.
谢谢夸奖
Oh, you were talking about Marvin.
你是在说马文啊
Sorry, it's been a really, really long day.
抱歉 我今天过得实在太糟糕了
When we get there, I'll buy you a drink.
到了之后 我请你喝一杯
Thank you, but, um, after I drop you off,
谢谢你 不过送完你们之后
I'm heading back to the city.
我就要回市里了
What? I thought you said that
什么 你不是说
your-your band's playing the wedding.
这次婚礼演奏的是你们乐队吗
Why are you leaving?
你为什么要走
The lead singer.
主唱那个人
He's the devil.
简直是魔鬼
He's a total fire-starter.
他超级爱煽风点火
He just ruins people's lives for his own amusement.
喜欢把自己的快乐建立在别人的痛苦上
You know, he will walk up to two friends,
他会走到两个朋友中间
he will find the one thing
找到他们的矛盾点
that will destroy their friendship and just-- poof!--
然后趁机毁掉他们的友谊 转瞬之间
burn it to the ground.
友谊轰然倒塌
What's his name?
他叫什么名字
What's poppin', mi amigos?
朋友们 你们好啊
Darren.
戴伦
You're rooting for Marshall?!
你居然支持马修
Well, why don't you just get
不如你直接去买♥♥一件
a team Marshall T-shirt?
支持马修的T恤好了
What size are you?
你要穿什么尺码
Extra-traitor?
加大"叛徒"码吗
No. No, okay...
不 听我说
What I said was...
我说的是...
See, all I meant was...
我 我的意思是...
God, how did we get here?
天啊 怎么会变成这样
That's the question you're left asking yourself.
最后你会抓狂地问自己这个问题
So here's how he does it:
他的做法是这样的
First, he makes you feel like you are
首先 他会让你觉得自己
the most hilarious and adorable person in the world...
是世界上最搞笑又可爱的人
You guys are hilarious and adorable!
你们俩真是既搞笑又可爱
I like that he gets
但我喜欢
how hilarious and adorable we are.
他能懂我们的搞笑与可爱
We are hilarious and adorable.
我们就是既搞笑又可爱
Next, he finds some flimsy connection with you
然后 他会想方设法套近乎
based on where you're from...
一般从你的家乡下手
Cleveland? Yeah.
克利夫兰吗 对
Galluci's serves the
戈鲁奇家的意大利辣味香肠面包
best pepperoni bread! Best pepperoni bread!
人间美味啊 人间美味啊
And Staten Island!
你来自史坦顿岛吗
Guys getting in fights on their front lawns!
男人们总是在门前的草地上打架
It's like you're from there!
你简直是我老乡
This guy's awesome!
这兄弟太赞了
So awesome!
太棒
I'd totally go to jail for him.
我绝对愿意为了他坐牢
That hurts.
我好受伤啊
Next, he tells you a "deep personal secret"
然后 他会跟你讲一个所谓的"私人秘密"
that is usually the tragic back-story
一般是从一部儿童影片里
from an animated kid's film.
剽窃的悲惨故事
My mother died on a hunting trip.
我妈妈在出门打猎的时候死了
It's often Bambi.
一般会用《小鹿斑比》
My father was betrayed and killed
我爸爸被他很信任的顾问背叛
by a trusted advisor.
惨死其手
Sometimes he'll throw a little Lion King in there.
有时候他会加一点《狮子王》的情节
I have no family.
我没有家人
But tonight...
可是今晚
I think maybe I found two brothers.
我似乎找到了两位兄弟
Sorry, blah, too heavy.
抱歉 话题太沉重了
That's okay, man.
没关系 兄弟
Let me get you a drink.
我去帮你拿杯酒
And then, once your guard is down,
一旦你们放松警惕
the emotional prostate exam begins...
他会开始进行情感前列腺检查
So, Ted,
泰德
what's going on... with you?
你最近过得 怎么样啊
Well... I mean, there was this thing...
其实 是有这么一件事
Never mind.
算了
This is me you're talking to.
你跟我有啥不能说的
Look, all I meant
我的意思是
was that there are two sides here.
凡事都有两面性
Yes,
没错
Italy is your dream,
意大利是你的梦想
but being a judge is Marshall's.
可是当法官是马修的梦想
Well, that and teaching prop comedy to a tropical bird.
还有教一只热带小鸟演道具喜剧
Parrot top has nothing to do with this!
鹦鹉服和这事没有关系
I don't need objectivity.
我不需要客观分♥析♥
You're my best friend, I just need your support.
你是我最好的朋友 我只需要你的支持
I understand. You got it.
我明白 我支持你
I'm sorry.
对不起
Oh, me, too.
我也对不起
Forgot my phone.
把手♥机♥忘这了
I'm sorry, you guys are probably talking wedding details.
你们是在讨论婚礼的细节吗
I mean, no maid of honor's gonna steal the spotlight
周末可以新娘的大日子
with her own problem on the bride's big weekend, am I right?
伴娘可不能因为自己的问题抢走风头 对吧
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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