老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother S09E07
Part 2
Oct. 22, 2020, 1:54 p.m.
Ted, listen, I need you to sneak into Lily's room,
泰德 我要你溜进莉莉的房♥间
find her phone, and delete the last text she got.
找到她的手♥机♥ 然后删除她最新收到的短♥信♥
Why? What's...
为什么 怎么...
Ted, I need you to do this.
泰德 我需要你的帮助
No questions asked.
不许多问
And as we both know, you owe me a "no questions asked."
我们都清楚 你欠我一个"不许多问"的人情
Hey. Listen, I need you to do something for me
我需要你帮我做点事
No questions asked, okay? What is it?
不许多问 行吗 什么事
Meet me at the corner of 53rd and 8th.
来53号♥街和8号♥街的拐角处见我
Bring your drill.
把你的钻子带上
Marshall.
马修
What the hell?
搞毛啊
How did you...
你怎么...
No...
不许
questions... asked.
多问
I broke federal law drilling you out of that mailbox.
我违反了联邦法律 用钻子把你从邮箱里救出来
Hey, I was a man in need.
我当时是需要帮助的人
I know. You were a "Priority male."
我知道 你是"特权男"[特权邮]
You said you'd stop doing that joke
《火箭炮·乔》漫画的编辑拒绝这名字后
after the editor of Bazooka Joe comics rejected it.
你说过不会再提这个笑话了
That man is a comedy snob.
那人是个漫画的假行家
The point is,
反正重点是
you owe me a "no questions asked."
你欠我一个"不许多问"的人情
Okay, okay! I'll delete the text.
好好 我去删信息
Thank you.
多谢
I just have to figure out
我得想想
How to get into Lily's room.
怎么溜进莉莉的房♥间
Easy. The lock on her door is busted, so...
简单 她房♥间的锁坏了
The drainpipe! What?
下水管道 什么
There's a drainpipe that runs up near her window,
她窗户的旁边有一根下水管道
and, no big deal, I can totally climb it.
小菜一碟 我完全可以爬上去
I'll call you when it's done.
完事后打给你
Her door is unlock...
她的房♥门没锁啊
Marshall wanted me to check on you.
马修让我来看看你
He was worried that you might be scared
他担心你一个人
all alone in the ghost room.
在闹鬼的房♥里会害怕
Remind me to call you next time Marvin has a nightmare--
下次马文♥做♥噩梦 记得让我打给你
you can calm him by bursting into his room
你可以带着链锯和曲棍球面具[恐怖电影]
with a chain saw and a hockey mask!
闯进他的房♥间去安抚他
Sorry, I didn't want to knock
抱歉 我不敲门
in case you were already asleep,
是怕吵到你睡觉
so I just climbed the drainpipe up to your window.
所以我就从下水管道爬上来
No big deal.
小菜一碟
Mm, opened the latch with this here coat hanger.
然后用这个衣架打开窗户锁
I would have called, but, uh...
我应该先打电♥话♥
Well, I didn't know if you'd have your phone handy.
但是我怕你的手♥机♥不在手边
Say, where is that old phone of yours?
话说你的手♥机♥呢
Ted, I am not scared,
泰德 我不害怕
So why don't you head back to your room...
你何不回你自己的房♥间
Oh... kay...
好吧
Why, I guess you can stay until I fall asleep,
要不我睡着了你再走吧
if it'll make you feel better?
如果这样能让你安心的话
a-and...
还有...
Maybe if it'll make you feel even better,
如果能让你更安心的话
you can sing me a version of Marvin's lullaby?
给我唱一首马文的摇篮曲吧
Okay.
好吧
Okay.
好吧
** Night-night, little Lily *
* 睡吧睡吧 小莉莉
** No ifs, ands or buts *
* 没有任何借口
** No peg-legged ghost is waiting *
* 没有断腿的鬼魂
** To hook out your guts. *
* 把你的内脏钩出来
Ted!
泰德
Sorry. Sorry.
抱歉抱歉
Nighty-night.
睡吧 睡吧
Cold...
冷啊
So cold.
冷死人了
Help me.
救我
Help me...
救救我
Oh, God, the hooker's here! Ted,
天啊 这里有鬼[妓♥女♥] 泰德
I am not gonna cheat on Robin.
我不会背叛罗宾
But you're a hell of a best man for getting me one, buddy.
不过你真是个好伴郎 还给我找了个妓♥女♥
Where is she?
她在哪里
All right, I'll take a lap dance.
先来段大腿舞
Can I borrow some sweatpants?
能借我一条运动裤吗
Barney, what are you doing in there?
巴尼 你在里面干什么
Marshall asked me to do something for him,
马修让我为他做点事
no questions asked.
不许多问
Sidebar-- I forgot to get my cousin David
另外 上周我表弟大卫的受戒仪式
something for his bar mitzvah last week.
我忘了给他送礼物
Could you send the hooker to his room?
你能把这个妓♥女♥[鬼]送到他的房♥间吗
Wait, Marshall called you, too?
慢着 马修也给你打电♥话♥了吗
Turns out I wasn't Marshall's first call.
原来我不是马修第一个找的人
Can't you guys just fire blanks?
他们就不能放空枪吗
At a wedding?
在婚礼上
Yeah, that's romantic.
那可真够"浪漫"
I just wish I would've known about the guns.
你要是早告诉我枪的事就好了
Well, I wish I'd known about the doves.
你要是早告诉我鸽子的事就好了
That's the problem with us--
这就是我们的问题所在
we don't think about checking in
在做事之前
with the other person before doing something.
我们都没想过要和对方商量
Honestly, I think that's what broke us up the first time.
老实说 这就是我们之前分手的原因
We're both... lone wolves--
我们都是孤狼
always off in our own worlds.
总是只顾自己 不管别人
That's not gonna work.
这样不行
Not in a marriage, no. What?
在婚姻中是不行 什么
Sorry, I was thinking about getting the doves
抱歉 我在想给鸽子们
little kevlar tuxedos, but that's not gonna work--
穿上防弹燕尾服 不过这样不行
There's no time for a fitting.
没时间订做衣服了
Listen, I need you to get to Lily's phone without her seeing,
我需要你趁莉莉不注意拿到她的手♥机♥
and delete the last text she got.
把最新收到的短♥信♥删掉
Why? What did you...
为什么 你...
And I need you to do it no questions asked.
我需要你的帮助 不许多问
As you'll recall, you owe me a "no questions asked."
你应该记得 你欠我一个"不许多问"的人情
hello?
喂
Marshall, I need you to rush to the Macy's in Herald Square,
马修 立刻去先驱广场的梅西百货公♥司♥
Find the utility closet on the third floor,
找到三楼的储藏室
and bring me the following things:
把这些东西给我带来
a clean pair of underwear, a clean pair of pants,
一条干净的内♥裤♥ 一条干净的裤子
a box of moist towelettes, hand sanitizer,
一盒湿巾 洗手液
And a garbage bag, no questions asked.
还有一个垃圾袋 不许多问
You deuced your pants.
你拉裤子上了
Never mind.
算了吧
Ha. You didn't wind up helping me, so it doesn't count.
结果最后你没有帮到我 所以不算
Face!
你输了
Yes, I'm the one who should be embarrassed by that story.
好吧 说得好像这件事我比较丢脸一样
But that wasn't the time I meant.
但我说的不是那次
This was last fall.
而是去年秋天的那次
Hey, I got here as fast as I could.
我尽快赶来了
Are you okay? Yeah, fine.
你还好吗 我没事
Th-these quacks said I was...
这群庸医说我
unfit to leave on my own. Blah, blah, blah.
"不适合独自离开"什么的
"Danger to myself." Blah, blah, blah.
"容易有危险"什么的
"Whoever signs me out is legally responsible for my actions."
"签名带我离开的人 要对我的行为负责"
I just need you to sign me out.
我需要你签名带我出去
What the hell happened?
到底发生了什么事
I said no questions asked.
我说了"不许多问"
W...
可是
Star, clover, horseshoe.
星星 三叶草 马蹄铁
Barney, did you swallow real versions
巴尼 你是不是把所有真实版幸运物
of all the lucky charms items?
都吞进了肚子里
老爸老妈的浪漫史（2005）
How I Met Your Mother
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