糟糕历史（2009）

Horrible Histories S02E01

Part 3 Jan. 3, 2021, 2:09 p.m.

你可以在室内做同时不会打碎东西
you can play indoors without smashing things up.
浦那啊[羽毛球发源于印度浦那]
Well, there's always poona.
[poo有"大便"的意思]
浦那听起来更糟
Poona? Sounds even messier.
不是我刚从印度回来
Oh, no, I've just come back from India
浦那是当地的一种运动
and poona is a game they play there.
真的哦
类似网球但打的是像毽子的东西
Like tennis, but with a shuttlecock
非常适合在室内玩试试吧
and it's perfectly safe to play indoors, go on try it.
那就打浦那啦
Poona it is then.
有人要打浦那吗
Anyone for poona?
亲爱的不要再说浦那了
Oh darling, do stop saying poona.
我们就不能给它起个高雅点的名字吗
Can't we think of a less smelly name for it?
对最先开始于拜德明顿庄园的运动
Yes, good idea. What can we call this game that we first played here
我们叫它什么好呢
in Badminton House?
我知道取个使人一听到就会想起
I know, something that would link it ever more
拜德明顿庄园的名字
to Badminton House.
拜德明顿庄园
Badminton House?
我知道了就叫它庄园吧
I've got it. We can call it house.
或者叫拜德明顿[羽毛球]
Or badminton.
真荒唐啊
What a ridiculous suggestion!
有谁听过哪种运动叫拜德明顿[羽毛球]
Who's ever heard of a game called badminton?
坦白讲
Honestly.
亲爱的
Oh, darling.
抱歉
Excuse me.
维多利亚时代的怪人
Great eccentrics of the Victorian era,
罗斯柴尔德男爵二世
the second Baron Rothschild.
显然布里奇沃特伯爵八世
Yes, apparently the 8th Earl of Bridgwater
经常跟他唯一的客人宠物狗共进晚餐
used to have dinner parties with the only guests - his pet dogs!
我觉得他疯了
Sounds to me like the man was out of his mind,
你同意吗长臂猿先生
wouldn't you agree, Mr Gibbons?
我就当那是同意啦
I'll take that as a yes.
我们不要随便对别人品头论足
Still one shouldn't really judge,
今晚我自己请来的一些客人也很古怪啊
suppose I have some rather strange dinner guests myself this evening.
当然了牧师还没到呢
Of course the vicar hasn't arrived yet.
我懂我懂的
I know, I know.
但不用担心他不会待太久的
But don't worry he won't stay for long.
不知怎么的他就是不喜欢
For some reasons he doesn't like
那些缠在楼梯扶栏上的蛇
the live snakes I have wrapped round the banisters.
好吧我们开动吧我饿死了
All right, let's get started. I'm starving.
是啊汤很烫是吧
Yes, the soup is hot, it isn't?
黑猩猩先生递给我一个小圆面包好吗
I say, Mr Chimpington, could you pass me a bit roll?
黑猩猩先生我们不是这样传...
Mr Chimpington, that is not how we pass...
我非常希望这只是巧克力蛋糕
And I very much hope that was one of cook's brownies.
注意点我们又不是动物
Really now, we're not animals.
全部属实
That's all true.
罗斯柴尔德男爵二世真和猴子们共进晚餐
The second Baron Rothschild really did have dinner parties with monkeys
蛇就缠在他家楼梯栏杆上
and snakes wrapped around his banisters.
他还有辆马车是由...斑马拉的
He also had a carriage drawn by - wait for it - zebras.
他的确这么做了不信去查历史书
Really he did, look it up in a history book,
书上都白纸黑字的写着呢
it's all there in black and white.
白纸黑字黑白相间小斑马
And black-and-white, and black-and-white...
维多利亚时代还真有些非常古怪的人
Some Victorians really were very eccentric.
愚蠢的死法之
鲍比·利奇
死得傻呀死得傻*
*Stupid deaths, stupid deaths
真人真事乐哈哈*
*They're funny cos they're true
死得傻呀死得傻*
*Stupid deaths, stupid deaths
下次不要到你家*
*Hope next time, it's not you
不喜欢吗为啥
Don't like them? Why not?
下一位
Next.
你是谁
And you are?
鲍比·利奇维多利亚时期有名的
Bobby Leach, famous Victorian
傻大胆和特技替身演员
daredevil and stuntman.
特技替身演员来我可高兴了
Oh, I love it when stuntmen come through.
他们的死法总是最傻的
They always have the most stupid deaths.
赶紧的说来听听
Go on, spill the beans.
我无所畏惧没有什么事是我不敢做的
Well, I was fearless, there was nothing I wouldn't do.
所以我决定缩在桶里冲下尼亚加拉大瀑布
So I decided to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel.
然后你就死了你个二货
And you died! You idiot!
没有我活下来了
No, no, I survived.
伤是有几处但我都养好了
I had a few injuries but I made a full recovery.
真遗憾
Uh. That's a shame.
所以我又决定去渡尼亚加拉涡流
So then I decided to swam the rapids at the Niagara whirlpool.
这次你死了我打赌你死了
And then you died! I bet you did.
你死了对吧我打赌你死了
You did, didn't you? I bet you did.
没没死成我被救了
No, no, I had to get rescued.
所以我又尝试了一次
So I tried it again.
-这下你淹死了 -没我又被救了
- And then you drowned! - No, I was rescued again.
又被救了第三次
And I got rescued the third time.
烦不烦啊太荒谬了
Business. Ridiculous.
所以我决定环游世界
So I decided to go on a tour of the world
向付钱的观众展示我的尼亚加拉瀑布圆桶
displaying my Niagara Falls barrel to the paying crowd.
最终去了新西兰到那儿我才死
And I ended up in New Zealand. And that's where I died.
在蒙眼游过瀑布的过程中死的吗
By swimming over a waterfall blindfolded?
我踩在一块橙子皮上滑倒了
No, I slipped on an orange peel,
伤了腿死于坏疽
broke my leg and died of gangrene.
滑在一块橙子皮上
By slipping on an orange peel!
你个二货
You lemon!
通过三个通过
Oh, yes, that's three yeses.
你可以再去投胎了
You're through to the afterlife.
非常感谢
Oh, well, thank you very much.
再见
Toodle pip!
注意脚下
Hey, mind how you go.
抱歉
Sorry!
我水平还不赖是吧
I'm on form, aren't I?
死得傻呀死得傻*
*Stupid deaths, stupid deaths
下次不要到你家*
*Hope next time, it's not you
卑劣的斯图亚特王朝
众所周知 11月5日盖伊·福克斯
Everyone knows that Guy Fawkes
试图炸毁议会大厦
tried to blow up Parliament on November 5th.
但你是否知道
But did you know that
他只是一个庞大组织中的一枚棋子
he was one member of a much bigger gang?
事实上一共有十三个同伙
In fact there were 13 of them all together.
快招了吧福克斯
Come on, Fawkes.
你不可能一个人完成这件事
You couldn't have done this alone.
还有谁是你的同伙
Who was in your gang?
我死也不会告诉你
I'll never tell you.
咱们走着瞧
We'll see about that.
-怎么了 -怎么
- What? - What?
你不准笑只有我才能笑
No, you don't laugh, I laugh.
福克斯之十三罗汉
这阴谋你绝对意想不到
It was the plot that seemed unthinkable.
福克斯是炸♥弹♥专家
Fawkes is the explosives expert.
我们要在议会开幕仪式上
So we're going to blow up King James and his entire family
炸掉詹姆士国王他全家
at the state Opening of Parliament?
没错
That's right.
事出有因还是纯属找乐子
Any reason or just for fun?
约翰·莱特是说客
John Wright is the persuader.
因为我俩都信奉天主教
Because you're a Catholic and I'm a Catholic
而国王讨厌天主教♥徒♥
and the King hates Catholics.
他好像总以为我们在密谋些什么
He seems to think we're always plotting something.
正合他意
As if!
这阴谋听起来简直天方夜谭
It was the plot that sounded impossible.
罗伯特·卡茨比是组织筹划者
Robert Gatesby is the brains.
所以说我们只需
So we're just supposed to
顺着泰晤士河运走36桶火♥药♥
roll 36 barrels of gunpowder down the Thames,
把它们偷运进这间租来的地窖
sneak it into this rented cellar,
等待议会开幕
wait for Parliament to open -
接着我悄悄溜进去点燃导火索
and I creep back in, light the fuse,
在炸死国王之前逃跑
run away and blow up the King
还不能被人抓到
and all without getting caught?
没错
Yes.