掩耳盗邻（2025）

Your Friends and Neighbors S01E08

Part 1 May 27, 2025, 10:42 p.m.

这完全说得通
It makes total sense.
库普和萨也许是在酒吧派对或烧烤上偶遇彼此
Coop and Sam run into each other at a bar, or at a party, a barbecue.
他们俩的伴侣都出轨了
They've both been cheated on.
他们俩都很有魅力
He's hot. She's hot.
两人都寂寞也喝醉了
They're both lonely, they're both drunk.
唾手可得
Low-hanging fruit.
他们要是没搞在一起那才奇怪
The only surprise would be if they didn't start fucking.
他们就这样持续了我不知道也许三个月或半年
So then time goes by. I don't know. Three months, six months.
他们秘密约会因为顾忌梅尔、保罗还有其他人
They keep it quiet 'cause, you know, Mel and Paul and everyone else.
但后来被保罗发现了
But then Paul finds out about it.
他找库普算账结果被库普杀了
He goes after Coop, and Coop kills him.
就是自卫、一时冲动之类的…
Self-defense. Crime of passion. Something…
这太不可思议了
That's ridiculous.
除非有人能拿出确凿的证据
Unless someone shows me incontrovertible evidence,
否则我绝不相信库普会杀人
I just won't believe that Coop's a murderer.
拜托我们都认识他这么久了
I mean, come on, we've all known him for years.
是啊但我们都不知道他和萨搞在一起对吧？
Yeah, but somehow none of us knew about him and Sam hooking up, right?
我只是想说
I'm just saying.
我们对库普并不完全了解
We don't know everything there is to know about Coop.
对萨也一样
Or Sam, apparently.
保罗多年来一直对她不忠
Paul's been cheating on her for years.
他在离婚一事上表现得像个混♥蛋♥ 也许是她一时失控杀了他
He's being a bastard about the divorce. Maybe she just snapped and killed him.
或者更可能是某个完全不相干的人干的
Or, most likely, someone unrelated.
谁知道保罗♥干♥过些什么事？
I mean, who knows what Paul may have been into?
事情发生时萨在波士顿陪父母
Sam was up in Boston with her parents when it happened.
警方肯定查过她的不在场证明
I'm sure the police checked her alibi.
格蕾丝找过梅尔吗？
Grace, did you speak to Mel?
我最近很忙在她的语♥音♥信箱留言了
Left her a voicemail. Been tied up.
天啊对了巴尼怎么样了？
Oh, my God. That's right. How's Barney doing?
他回家了算是好事吧应该是吧
Well, he's home, which is good. I guess.
他肩膀脱臼肋骨骨裂现在又发生这种事
Dislocated shoulder, cracked rib, now this.
为了我的心智健康我让他服用镇静剂
I'm keeping him sedated for my own sanity.
你们是否注意到我们这里的暴♥力♥事件增加了？
Is anyone else noticing an uptick in violence around here?
到底怎么回事？
I mean, what the hell?
我昨晚和梅尔聊过了
I spoke to Mel last night.
她很生库普的气但也相当确定他是无辜的
She's pissed at him but she's also pretty sure that he's innocent.
他可是她孩子的父亲她当然会这么认为
He's the father of her children. Of course she is.
他被逮捕时的样子不像是无辜的
He didn't look innocent when they arrested him.
人被戴上手铐看上去都不无辜
No one looks innocent in handcuffs.
像我说的完全有可能是另一个人干的或是抓错人了
Like I said, it could've been someone else entirely. Or a mistake.
涉嫌谋杀的永远都说抓错人了
Murder is always a mistake.
饭后不能谈的事就不要做
One should not do anything one cannot talk about after dinner.
奥斯卡王尔德说的
Oscar Wilde said that.
什么？
What?
依我说
I'm telling you.
保罗撞见他们后怒火中伤就开枪了
Paul walked in on them, things got heated. Bam.
保罗有自己的恶心女服务生他怎么会在乎？
Paul's got his skanky waitress. Why would he care?
男人的领地意识都是很强的兄弟法则什么的
Men are territorial. Bro code. Whatever.
所以你的推论是库普在萨的家里跟她上♥床♥
So your theory is that Coop is having sex with Sam in her house,
完全不介意她远在超过300公里外
not at all deterred by the fact that she's 200 miles away.
而在这场听起来离谱的远距离性♥爱♥中
And while they're defying the laws of physics with this long-distance fuck-fest,
早就不住在那里的保罗却刚好撞见了他们？
Paul, who no longer lives there, nevertheless walks in on them.
然后在你编的这个剧情里
And in this scenario you've concocted,
库普这个一辈子都没碰过枪的人
Coop, who has never shot a gun in his life,
身上或附近居然有把不属于他的枪因为他…
has a gun that he has never owned on him or near him since he's
- 当时显然没穿裤子 - 我又没说我能解答所有的疑问
- ostensibly not wearing any pants. - I'm not saying I have all the answers.
他们只是炮♥友♥
They were fuck buddies.
没人会为了炮♥友♥杀人
You don't kill over a fuck buddy.
也许他们不只是炮♥友♥
You don't know that it wasn't more than that.
库普不可能爱上萨曼莎莱维特
Coop is not in love with Samantha Levitt.
你怎能确定？
How do you know?
因为他还爱着梅尔
Because he's still in love with Mel.
如果库普真要杀人他早就杀了尼克
If Coop was gonna kill anyone, he would've killed Nick a long time ago,
但他没有知道为何吗？
but he didn't. You know why?
因为他不会杀人
Because Coop's not a murderer.
这整件事简直荒唐透了
This whole situation is just beyond.
他能若无其事地站在追悼会上
He just stood there at the memorial service,
表现得什么事都没发生一样
like everything was perfectly fine.
因为不是他干的
Because he didn't do it.
就是
Of course.
或者他是个心理变♥态♥
Or he's a sociopath.
好了苏不是吧？简直…我…
Okay. Suz, really? What the… I…
那我们还要出席米勒癌症慈善晚会吗？
So, are we still going to the Miller's cancer gala?
- 还用说？当然要去 - 对
- Absolutely. Of course. - Yeah.
库柏先生
Mr. Cooper.
库柏先生
Mr. Cooper.
安德鲁库柏
Andrew Cooper.
是的法官大人
Yes, Your Honor.
你已经和你的律师谈过了
You've had the opportunity to confer with your attorney,
你明白自己所面对的指控吗？
and you understand the charges against you?
明白法官大人
Yes, Your Honor.
而你要做无罪抗辩
And you're entering a plea of not guilty.
- 是的法官大人 - 已记录在案
- Yes, Your Honor. - So recorded.
律师们到隔壁找我的书♥记♥员确认庭审日期
Lawyers, see my clerk next door to confirm the trial date.
保释金定为二十五万美元
Bail is set at $250,000.
那接下来呢？
So, what happens now?
伍德法官会给我们大约一个月的时间进行证据开示然后再开庭
Judge Wood will give us a month or so for discovery before we go to trial.
检察官没什么分量可能会有和解的机会
The prosecutor's a lightweight. There'll probably be a deal to be made.
我不要和解
I don't want a deal.
随你便
Suit yourself.
- 人不是我杀的凯特 - 我又没问你
- I didn't kill him, Kat. - I didn't ask.
为何不问我呢？
Well, why the fuck not?
你能回避一下吗？
Can you give us a minute?
你为什么不问呢？为什么？
Why didn't you ask? Why?
因为根本不重要
Because it doesn't matter.
我是被诬陷的好吗？
I'm a setup, okay?
听我说保罗的仇家太多了
I'm telling you. A lot of people hated Paul.
有可能是萨也可能是有人发现了我们的事
It could've been Sam, it could've been anyone who found out we were involved.
我算是最佳的替罪羊
I mean, I'm the perfect scapegoat.
可惜没法以这方式打赢官司
That's not how cases are won in real life.
- 那应该怎样？ - 按照惯例
- Then how? - Well, traditionally,
并不是靠勒索你的律师
not by blackmailing your attorney.
听着我们会一点一点削弱他们的指控从程序
Look, we chip away at their case, attacking them on procedure,
证据链、证人可信度专家证词这些方面入手
chain of evidence, witness credibility, expert testimony,
如果做得好就能建立合理怀疑
and if we do it well, we establish reasonable doubt.
你觉得你能做到这些？
And you think you can do all that?
你车里的那把枪会是棘手问题
The gun in your car is gonna be tricky.
凯特
Kat.
我从没输过库普
I don't lose, Coop.
你的保释金已经搞定了
Your bail's been sorted out.
我会在周四前拿到初步的证据开示物件
I'll have preliminary discovery by Thursday.
在这期间拜托尽量别再惹麻烦
In the meantime, for God's sake, try to stay out of trouble.
我能取回这辆车吗？
Any way I can get the car that goes with these?
安迪
Andy.
谢谢爸
Thanks, Dad.
给我想你可能饿了
Here. I thought you might be hungry.
给你做了火鸡三文治
Made you a turkey sandwich.
我不清楚你现在都吃些什么但这三文治曾经是你最爱吃的
I'm not sure what you eat these days, but that used to be your favorite.
会没事的
It's gonna be okay.
爸我不确定会不会有事
Dad, I'm not sure that it is.
先送你回家吧
Well, let's get you home.
你看起来需要洗个澡和睡个午觉
You look like you could use a shower and a nap.
送我去梅尔家就行了
Just drop me off at Mel's.
要我等你吗？
You want me to wait?
不用了
No. I'll be fine.
嘿你哪来的保释金？
Hey, where did you get the money for the bail?
是我的退休账户
My IRA.
爸你会被征收大量的税
Dad, you're gonna get killed on the taxes.
没办法也只好这样
It is what it is.
好吧我会还你钱的
All right. Well, I'll pay you back.