掩耳盗邻（2025）

Your Friends and Neighbors S01E04

Part 1 May 27, 2025, 10:42 p.m.

等一等
Wait!
(前往斯坦福德和纽黑文)
埃琳娜?
Elena?
放轻松是我库普
Take it easy. It's me. Coop.
情况不是你看上去的那样
It's not what it looks like.
看上去就是你正闯入
抢走你老婆的男人的家里偷窃
What it looks like is you're breaking into
the house of the guy who stole your wife.
这枪是尼克的?
Is that Nick's gun?
是我的
It's mine.
你为何需要带把枪?
Why do you need a gun?
那尼克又为何需要?
能别拿枪指着我吗?
- Why would Nick?
- Well, can you not point it at me?
你知道我不会伤害你的
You know I'm not gonna hurt you.
我不清楚自己知道什么
五分钟前我还不知道你是个小偷呢
I don't know what I know. Five minutes ago
I didn't know you were a thief.
我只是想偷走戒指
I was just gonna take the ring.
当尼克发现他的冠军戒指不见了
And when Nick notices
his championship ring is missing,
你觉得他会认为是谁偷的?
拜托尼克爱你
- who do you think he's gonna blame?
- Come on. Nick loves you.
尼克爱在我打扫他家时盯着我的屁♥股♥
Nick loves watching my ass
when I clean his house.
这...
That's...
说得过去
fair.
斯珀林一家也爱阿丽亚娜
The Sperlings loved Ariana.
可他们几天前炒了她
They fired her a few days ago.
斯珀林先生的
一块手表不见了他们认为是她偷的
One of Mr. Sperling's watches
went missing and they blamed her.
切尔西可算是那女人一手带大的
That woman practically raised Chelsea.
那块表是你偷的?
Was that you?
你朋友的事我很遗憾
Sorry about your friend.
你的麻烦其实更大
老实说我向来都不喜欢她
Well, you have bigger problems.
Honestly, I never liked her.
既然这样不用谢
In that case, you're welcome.
怎么?银行给你的薪水不够用吗?
What, they don't pay you
enough money at the bank?
是一家对冲基金
管它是什么
- It was a hedge fund.
- I don't care.
你老板上了我老婆
而我老板害我丢了工作
Your boss fucked my wife.
My boss fucked me out of a job.
好的这么说你失去了工作还有...
Okay. So you lost your job, and your...
你的好朋友以及你老婆
your buddy, and your wife.
那这几年你的确过得相当糟糕
That's a pretty bad couple of years.
没错而我在等你告诉我
接下来还会有多糟
Yeah, well, I'm waiting for you
to tell me just how bad it's gonna get.
你本打算怎么处理那戒指?
我有个买♥♥家
- What were you gonna do with that ring?
- I got a guy.
你的买♥♥家会叫你滚蛋
And your guy
would've told you to fuck off.
这可不是卡地亚项链
This is not a Cartier necklace.
这样的戒指一旦被报道出来
就会成为烫手山芋
A ring like that gets really hot
once it's been reported.
我觉得尼克短期内不会发现
I figured Nick
wouldn't notice for a while.
我觉得你只是想拿走他所爱的东西
I think that you just wanted
to take something that he loved.
以牙还牙
Like he did to you.
我想你早知道他们俩的事
I take it you knew about them.
比我知道的要早
Before me, I mean.
这么说吧你不是
第一个撞见他们偷吃的人
Let's just say you weren't
the first person to walk in on them.
太丢脸了
That's humiliating.
对他们来说?
是对我来说
- For them?
- For me.
就像我说的你的麻烦更大
Like I said, you have bigger problems.
那我们现在是什么情况?
So what are we doing here?
如果你要报♥警♥ 早就做了所以...
You would've called the cops already
if you were going to. So...
我决定替你保守秘密
I'm gonna keep your secret.
谢谢欠你个人情
Thank you. I owe you.
你也得替我保守秘密
And you're gonna keep mine.
抱歉我并不知道你的秘密
I'm sorry. I don't know your secret.
跟你的一样
It's the same as yours.
我们现在是搭档了
We're partners now.
梅尔
Mel.
嗨罗恩
Hey, Ron.
玛利
我们的两个乖孙还好吗?
- Marley.
- How are our perfect grandkids?
你们听说托丽赢得比赛了吗?
Did you hear Tori won her tournament?
听说了都听说了恭喜啊
We did. We heard all about it.
Congratulations.
我们都太骄傲了
We're so proud.
她的适应能力真的很了不起
It's remarkable, really,
how resilient she is.
你们应该来看她的下一场比赛
You should come to her next match.
那就邀请我们啊
Invite us and we'll come.
抱歉我以为你们的儿子邀请了你们
I'm sorry.
I assumed your son had invited you.
没事托丽后来打电♥话♥给我
给我发了张照片
It's fine. Tori called afterwards
and she sent me a picture.
我告诉她可以随时来我们家
I told her she could always
come by our place
若她需要暂时逃离那混乱局面
if she needed a break from all the chaos.
什么混乱局面?
What chaos?
她不是这个意思
She didn't mean chaos.
很确定她是
Pretty sure she did.
玛利什么混乱局面?
有什么情况是我不知道的吗?
What chaos, Marley?
You know something I don't know?
我其实没你清楚
Well, I'm just
not as close to it as you are.
对没错
No, you're not.
我想你忘记拿燕麦片了
I think you forgot to grab the oatmeal.
她言不由衷
She didn't mean any of that
the way it sounded.
她绝对是由衷之言
Oh, yes, she did.
我的意思是她并非有意说出由衷之言
I guess what I meant was
she doesn't mean to be the way she is.
这些人就是混♥蛋♥ 这点毋庸置疑
These people are assholes.
There's no getting around that.
但你从事的行业
But you work in a profession
天生就吸引并培养混♥蛋♥
that attracts and breeds assholes
as a matter of course.
我也知道要你穿上西装
And I know it sucks
having to put on your suit
去向薪资不如你的人求职很糟糕
and go ask guys
beneath your pay grade for a job,
但归根结底库普你我都是做销♥售♥的
but ultimately,
you and I are in sales, Coop.
我们推销的是自己
We sell ourselves.
俗话说得好
“做交易很糟糕做销♥售♥更惨”
You know what they say,
"Trading sucks. Sales swallows."
你能不能把这番训话留到以后再说?
Is there any way
you could postpone this lecture?
我刚碰到哈维拉特纳了
I just ran into Harvey Ratner.
我付你钱让你闭嘴吧
I will pay you to stop talking.
用什么来付?
With what?
拉特纳家族正在整合他们的业务
打算任命一位新的首席信息官
The Ratners are consolidating their
operations, looking to put in a new CIO.
拉特纳家族?我没惨到要死对吧?
The Ratners? I'm not dead yet, am I?
我知道这不理想
I know. It's not ideal.
但现在最重要的是得让你重回“战场”
But right now, more than anything,
we need you back in the game.
我只是需要休息一下
I just need to take a beat.
你已经在休息了
You're already taking a beat.
你不能在休息当中休息
You can't take a beat from taking a beat.
你到底在担心什么?我已经付你钱了
Well, what are you worried about?
I paid your bill.
没错用一个纸袋装着的现金
Yes, with a brown bag of cash.
但别以为这就能让我晚上睡得着
And don't think
that isn't keeping me up at night.
我需要你重回工作岗位库普
I need you back at work, Coop.
你自己也需要回去工作
You need you back at work.