掩耳盗邻（2025）

Your Friends and Neighbors S01E01

Part 5 May 27, 2025, 10:42 p.m.

I guess why I don't stick around is the idea
用我五千美元的烤架
of going into my backyard
吃着睡我老婆的男人烤的牛排
and eating steaks grilled on my $5,000 grill
会让我想抄起...
by the man who's fucking my wife would make me wanna take…
哇哦
...我那把旬藤次郎牛排刀
Wow.
…my Shun Fuji steak knife
捅穿自己的心脏
and cut out my own heart.
这就是我不想留下的原因
That's probably why I don't wanna stick around.
所以我先走了
So, I'm gonna go.
听着我理解你库普
Look, I get it, Coop.
真的感同身受
I feel you, man. I really do.
我只是想找个方式翻篇懂吗
I'm just trying to find a way past this, you know?
为了所有人好
For all of us.
祝你好运咯
Yeah, good luck with that.
告诉那小混♥蛋♥我会寄维修账单给他
Tell that little shit I'm him a bill.
小心脚宝贝
Watch your toes, babe.
我开了一整夜车
哈斯克尔睡得跟死猪一样
I drove all that night, while Haskell slept like a log.
开久了我也开始犯困
After a while I began to get sleepy myself.
但我很开心
I was happy though.
很快就能再见苏了
Soon I'd be with Sue again.
长途跋涉即将结束...
靠
The long trip was practically over…
Fuck.
...再也不用踩水泥路了
…and there'd be no more hoofing it down the concrete.
我开始展望未来
I began to think of the future
那前景灿烂得像是镶满了霓虹灯
which couldn't have been brighter if I'd embroidered it with neon lights.
想到苏能平步青云真好
It was nice to think of Sue shooting to the top.
或许我也能沾光
Maybe it was for me too.
你不知道要是被抓
Don't you realize if I'm caught
他们肯定会追查车的来源
they'll want to know where I got the car and stuff.
我就得背谋杀罪名
机灵点就不会被抓
And they'll have me on a murder charge.
If you're smart, you won't get caught.
嘿
Hey.
What are you doing?
嗨
嗨
Hi.
Hi.
耶！太棒了！来吧
Yeah! Fuck yeah! Come on414
萨曼莎的丈夫保罗靠连锁餐厅发家
Samantha's husband, Paul, made his fortune in diners.
他有九家店 44寸腰围...
天
He had nine of them, a 44-inch waist…
Oh, God.
...还有严重的勃起功能障碍
…and a serious case of erectile dysfunction.
爽！要命！太棒了！
Yes! Goddamn it! Yeah!
分居后，她一直在弥补逝去的时光
Since they separated, she'd been making up for lost time.
老天
Jesus.
你把我皮都抓破了
You know, I think you actually broke the skin.
这样才能证明我不是装的
Oh, well, that's how you know I wasn't faking it.
没事吧？
Everything okay?
嗯没事
Uh-huh. Yeah.
你要走了？
Do you have to go?
不走
No.
怎么？你想让我走？
Why? Did you want me to go?
不是我只是...
No, I just…
你看起来像是有心事...
You looked like you had something…
重要的事
没有
important.
No.
那好吧好吧
But okay. Okay431
刚才怎么回事？
什么？一切都很完美
Hey, what just happened?
What? Everything's perfect.
有话直说行吗
No, if you have something you wanna say, please just say it.
一分钟前你还在我体内
现在巴不得我立刻消失
I mean, you were just literally coming inside me a minute ago,
and can't get rid of me fast enough.
萨姆天呐
Sam, my God.
不说真的没关系我走
No, honestly, it's fine. No, it's fine. I'll go.
毕竟这是生理现象对吧
Seriously, I mean, it's biology, right?
高♥潮♥后的多巴胺骤降
The dopamine crash after the rush of orgasm.
我以为你在担心孩子
I thought maybe something was going on with your kids.
孩子们早睡熟了多谢关心啊
No, my kids are fast asleep, but so much for your concern.
听着可能有些误会
Okay, look, I… Maybe something's getting misconstrued here.
我觉得你没懂我意思
I feel like you're not understanding me. Look--
老实说你这态度让人很不爽
No, it's just a little off-putting if I'm being honest, and…
是你打电♥话♥约我的吧？
I mean, 'cause you called me, right?
我换上性感内衣找了保姆
还专门去角质
And then I changed into something sexy, and… I got a sitter and I exfoliated.
萨姆萨姆
Sam. Sam. Sam. Sam.
萨姆
Sam.
抱歉
I'm sorry.
我不想你走好吗？
Okay? I don't want you to leave.
说实话
Tell me the truth.
你觉得我们有可能更进一步吗？
Do you ever think that we could be something more than this?
别这样萨姆
Come on. Sam.
得了吧
Come on.
我们这样断断续续半年了
We'd been doing this on and off for half a year,
每次收场都很狼狈
and I had yet to stick the landing.
我在贝利的业绩数据你知道吧？
Look, you know the kind of numbers I was doing over at Bailey, right?
我能带过半客户资源过来
I could bring half that book over here,
加上德州石油家族的关系
we combine that with the Texas oil families,
一年内就能做到五亿规模
I could be doing half a billion dollars in under a year. Come on. It's a win-win.
前提是你没睡过同事
And you haven't slept with any of our associates yet.
杰克打过招呼了没人敢跟你约会
Look, Jack's making calls. No one's allowed to date you.
蒙蒂这工作还是我介绍的
Just bring me in.
Come on, Monty. I got you this job.
他在到处打招呼啊
He's making calls, man.
我知道杰克在施压
Look, I know Jack's been making calls.
去他的这儿没人买♥♥他的账
Fuck Jack. He's got no friends here.
这倒是个好消息
That's good to know.
现在不能得罪杰克
Look, I can't afford to piss Jack off.
今年科技股亏得太惨
Not now, not with the beating we're taking in tech this year.
我早就想挖你了
I have been wanting to poach you for a while.
这个...
竞业禁止期多久？90天？
Well…
What's your non-solicit, 90 days?
你当初也坐过我这个位置
我们处境对调过
You were once in this seat, Monty, and I was in yours.
是啊
两年？
Yeah, I know.
Two years?
签之前没找律师看条款？
Didn't you get a lawyer look before you signed?
他们开价够高呗
Well, they made it worth my while, what can I say?
要听建议吗？
You want my advice?
并不想
Not really.
库普我不能直接录用你
Come on, Coop. You know I can't bring you in cold.
先休息段时间等风头过去
Take some time off, you let the stink fade 'cause no one's gonna touch you right now.
可以联♥系♥迪拜新成立的家族办公室
You should reach out to one of the new family offices coming out of Dubai.
他们才不管什么竞业协议
They won't give a shit about your non-solicit or this thing with the girl.
我跟那姑娘没事
The girl wasn't a thing.
总之他们不在乎这些
They won't care either way is my point.
库普别这样
Coop, come on, don't be like that.
抱歉迟到了
Sorry I'm late.
老规矩
I got the usual.
明天米勒家的派对你去吗？
You going to that Miller thing tomorrow?
受邀了干嘛不去？
I was invited, why wouldn't I?
没理由
No reason.
要是梅尔和尼克在场我就不社交
If I avoided every social situation because Mel and Nick might be there,
这辈子都不用出门了
我站库普这边
I'd never leave the fucking house.
Hey, I'm on Team Coop.
哪有什么站队
得了吧
There's no teams.
Bullshit.
怎么了？
Okay, what's wrong?
什么？
What?
你居然没看手♥机♥
You're not checking your phone.
也没狼吞虎咽肯定有事
You're not rushing through the meal. Something's up.
如果我不工作会怎样？
What if I didn't work for a while?
为什么这么问？
Now, why would you do that?
陪陪孩子看看书
I don't know, maybe to see my kids. I don't know, read a book.
就休息几周
So, we're talking a couple weeks,