好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S01E20
Part 3
Nov. 17, 2020, noon
don't tell me to shut up. calm down.
你才该闭嘴呢 冷静
i don't even know what he's doing here.
我都不知道你把他弄这来干什么
i'm trying to keep your kid From turning into a neurotic basket case like my brother.
我正在努力别让你的孩子变成我兄弟这样神经兮兮的废物
Maybe then,he won't marry a messed up woman.
不然到那时 他又会找回来个像这么糟糕的媳妇
I'm screwed up because you're a lousy brother.
我糟糕那你就脱得了干系吗
my god,your whole family's insane. hold on,people!
晕 你们一家子都疯了 大家别吵啦！
Even cows know
牛牛都知道
Words can hurt.
语出伤人的哟
Jake,you know that even though your mother and I bicker sometimes,
杰克 虽然我跟你妈经常斗嘴
We will always love you,no matter what.
我们都会一直爱着你的 不管怎样
I know.
我知道
And,honey,you also need to know that our splitting up
而且 宝贝 你也得知道我们分居
had absolutely nothing to do with you. i know.
完全跟你无关 我知道
It's just that mommy has a right to be happy.
只是妈咪也有幸福的权利
Yeah,he knows.
好了好了 他知道了
And whatever's bothering you,
那不管你有什么烦恼
You know I had nothing to do with it,right?
你都应该清楚都跟我无关 对吧？
yeah. see?
是的 看见没!
Can I go to bed now?
能去睡觉了吗？
Now? jake,it's only 7:00.
现在？杰克 现在才7点
I'm tired.
我累了
All right,honey. I'll come tuck you in before I leave.
好吧 宝贝 我走前来给你盖被子
okay,that's a bad sign. it's a symptom of clinical depression.
这不是个好征兆 这是忧郁症的早期症状
You would know.
你肯定知道
Please,if my kids had gone to bed at 7:00
够了 如果我的孩子7点就爬上♥床♥
I'd have dipped myself in gravy and danced naked on the rooftops.
我就先跳进肉汤锅里洗个澡然后爬到房♥顶裸舞
She does make a hell of a gravy.
她的肉汤做得的确有一套
morning,uncle charlie. morning.
早上好 查理叔叔 早上好
Morning,dad. morning,berta.
早上好 老爸 早上好 贝塔
morning. morning.
早上好 早上好
So,dad,what are we gonna do today?
老爸 今天我们怎么玩儿?
I don't know. what would you like to do?
不知道 你想怎么玩?
I don't know,something fun. maybe we could jam,uncle charlie.
我不知道 有趣就行 我们来个摇滚合奏会吧 查理叔叔
Great.
很好
Dad,can I eat my cereal down by the tv?
爸爸 我能去电视那边吃麦片粥吗?
sure. thanks.
当然可以 谢谢
What happened to him?
他这是怎么了?
If I didn't know better,I'd swear he got laid last night.
如果没猜错的话 他昨晚肯定把初夜给送出去了
I hope you don't mind,
希望你们别介意
but I talked to him before he went to sleep last night.
昨天晚上他睡觉前我跟他说了几句
What did you say?
你说了什么?
I said,drink this bottle of prune juice.
我说 把这瓶西梅汁给我喝了(治便秘良药)
You feed him nothing but pizza and pancakes.
你就知道给他吃批萨跟煎饼
It's a wonder his eyeballs are still in their sockets.
他没把眼珠子给憋出来都已经是奇迹了
Wait a minute.
等等
Oh,man. not again.
晕 又来了
Jake harper. unplugged.
杰克·哈勃 不插电(双关 忍♥不住排泄)
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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