好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S01E14
Part 1
Nov. 17, 2020, 11:59 a.m.
The kick is up,it's long enough.
球踢起来了 力量足够t
The kick is no good.
球没有进门
Yes!
好t
who won?
哪家赢了
Who cares? we covered the spread.
谁鸟那个啊 反正我们两边都押注了
Charlie,call me an old-fashioned dad,
查理 也许我是很传统的父亲
But I was hoping my son wouldn't start betting on sports
不过我觉得在我孩子在开始酗酒之前
Until he was old enough to have a drinking problem.
不应该赌博体育比赛啊
He didn't really make a bet. I just gave him a taste of my action.
他没有 我只是让他体验一下我是怎么赌博的
Nor do I want him tasting your action.
我不想让他体验你如何赌博
Dad,without action,there's no juice.
老爸 没有行动 就没甜头
All of a sudden he's frank sinatra.
他怎么突然变成法兰克·辛纳屈了 (白人爵士歌♥王)
i bet that's the pizza. what's the spread?
肯定是披萨来了 上面放的什么
Pepperoni.
意大利香肠
What's next,charlie? you gonna teach him how to shoot craps?
接下来呢 查理 你准备教他怎么掷骰子?
He already knows how to shoot craps.
他已经知道怎么掷骰子了
I just wish I could teach him not to bet the hard eight.
我只是希望他别去赌硬八(掷出两个4算赢)
Mr. harper,here you go,nice and hot.
哈勃先生 给 还是热的呢
i threw in some extra garlic puffs as well.
我特地多撒了些蒜粉
Thanks,pal.
谢谢 兄弟
Thank you,mr. harper.
谢谢你 哈勃先生
If there's anything at all you ever need,please call.
如果有什么需要我做的 尽管打电♥话♥来
You know,pizza,dry-cleaning,pot,women.
披萨 干洗 大♥麻♥ 女人
how much did you tip him? i don't know,I gave him $50.
你给了他多少小费 我给了他50
That's like a 300% tip.
那可是300%的小费
If you say so. I was never good at math.
这样说的话 我数学很不好
Yeah,but you can figure out the point spread,the over-under
但是你很擅长算全国所有橄榄球比赛的
And the vigorish on every football game in the country.
分差 进球数和赔率
What can I tell you? I've got a beautiful mind.
怎么说呢 我有个"美丽心灵"(关于一位数学家的电影)
Morning,berta. need some help?
早上好 波塔 需要帮忙吗
Yeah. come to my house and explain to my daughter
你去给我女儿说明一下 我们家是不会为
That we don't put up bail for cute guys with costa rican passports.
一个拿着哥斯达黎加护照的帅哥交保释金的
morning. i got your groceries,charlie.
早上好 我帮你买♥♥好东西了 查理
You owe me $74.
你欠我74块
why didn't you just use my credit card? i tried.
为什么你不用我的信♥用♥卡♥ 我用了
Funny story.
说来搞笑
My platinum card.
我的白金卡
Look what they did to my platinum card.
他们对我的白金卡做了什么啊
They decapitated my holographic eagle.
他们切碎了我亲笔签名的老鹰卡
Yeah,that's sad. you owe me $74.
太糟糕了 你欠我74块
Relax,I'll write you a check.
别紧张 我写张支票给你
Berta,I'm good for $74.
波塔 我74块钱还是有的
There's an assistant store manager with bad skin and a pair of scissors
那位拿着剪刀 皮肤很粗糙的商店助理经理
Who begs to differ.
有不同意见
He obviously made a mistake. leave it to me,I'll straighten it out.
他明显是搞错了 我去澄清一下
Alan,what do I do?
艾伦 我该怎么办
Call the bank that issued the card and figure out what's going on.
打电♥话♥给办这张卡的银行 看看出了什么问题
Good idea.
好主意
How do I get the number?
号♥码在哪
It's usually on the back of the card.
一般来说都是在卡的背面
Okay,this may take a while.
看来得有一会儿了
Are you sure?
你确定吗
Okay,thanks.
好的 谢谢
I don't believe it.
难以置信
None of my bills have been paid in four months.
我已经四个月没付任何帐了
My credit is shot. all my cards are dead.
我的信用破产了 所有的卡都被封了
You don't have to worry about paying me this week.
这星期你不用还我钱了
Thank you,berta.
谢谢你 波塔
I'll just take this espresso maker and be on my way.
我就拿走这个煮咖啡器好了
Call me when things pick up.
等你事情解决了再给我打电♥话♥
Charlie,why haven't you been paying your bills?
查理 你为什么没有付账
Alan,I don't pay my own bills. I've got a guy.
艾伦 我不是自己付账的 有人帮我处理
Do you think you might want to call your guy?
那你是不是应该给他打个电♥话♥了
Don't talk down to me,alan. I'm not stupid.
别教育我 艾伦 我有脑子的
That's the first call I made.
我第一个电♥话♥就是打给他的
and? and
然后呢 然后
His number is not in service at this time.
他的号♥码停机了
Wonderful building.
多好的房♥子啊
What's wrong with it?
怎么了
The phrase "reeks of urine" comes to mind.
我想是 尿的恶臭吧
Here we are.
我们到了
That's seldom a good sign.
这看上去不太妙
hello,stan? who wants to know?
斯坦 谁找我
It's charlie harper.
查理·哈勃
Charlie! good to see you. come on in.
查理 很高兴见到你 进来吧
Just don't rip the tape,they check.
别把封条撕碎了 他们会检查的
So what's going on? what can I do you for?
怎么了 我能为你做点什么
Stan,I've got a problem.
斯坦 我有点问题了
Yeah,I know the feeling.
我知道这是什么感觉
Sit down,talk to me. come on.
请坐 跟我说说吧
All of my credit cards are dead.
我所有的信♥用♥卡♥都被封了
And they tell me the bills haven't been paid in four months.
他们告诉我 我已经4个月没付任何账了
Yeah,that sounds about right.
差不多是这么回事
Excuse me,maybe this is none of my business,
打断一下 也许这不关我的事情
But how does something like that happen?
但这样的情况是怎么会发生的
In layman's terms,your brother ran out of money.
用通俗的话来说 你兄弟没钱了
What? how did I run out of money?
什么 怎么可能呢
I knew you'd ask that.
我知道你会问的
Let me demonstrate.
我来给你举个例子
Think of this water as cash flow,
把这些水看作钱的流动
Which,for you,would be royalties from your jingles,right?
对你来说 就是你广♥告♥歌♥的版税 对吧
And this cup,your financial well-being.
这个杯子是你的财政状况
This little hole
这个小洞
Would be your expenses. you dig?
是你花钱的流量 明白了吧
Now,charlie,with most people,
查理 大多数人
When money comes in,
当钱进来的时候
It drips out and pays their bills
慢慢地花 然后付账单
With a healthy reserve for emergencies.
并且存着一部分作为紧急储备
But with you,however... this is what I love about you,charlie.
但你的情况是 我就喜欢你这点 查理
You spend it as quick as you get it.
你一拿到钱就花光了
You see,you don't drip,
不是慢慢地流
You hemorrhage.
而是大出血
Look at that.
看啊
But when the cash flow starts to slow down,
当钱进来的速度变慢的时候
There's no reserve.
一点都没剩了
Okay.
好吧
But what happened to my money?
那我的钱到底去哪了
Artists. where would we be without them?
艺术家 没有他们 我们怎么办啊
What I don't understand is why you didn't warn him this was happening.
我不理解的是 你为什么不警告他这些事情
Okay,mea culpa.
好吧 是我的错
Look,I've been a little distracted lately. slight problem with the feds.
我最近有点忙 和联邦调查局有点小问题
Are you embezzling from my brother?
你是不是在盗用我哥哥的钱
Embezzle what? hello!
盗用什么 你看啊
I thought you were the smart one.
我还以为你比较聪明呢
No,this is a totally unrelated,
这完全是和我无关的
Import-export problem,all right?
收入支出的问题
I just cannot believe that one of the pi馻tas showed up at a kids' party.
我不敢相信那个警♥察♥居然在一个孩子的派对上出现了
This has been a blast. don't get me wrong,
我们谈得不错 希望你们不要误解
But I have a plane to catch right now.
我现在得去赶飞机了
I'll tell you what,just feel free and browse through all your files.
你放轻松 把你自己的文件都浏览一遍吧
Listen,charlie,I'm running a little short on cash,so maybe you...
查理 我最近缺现金 你是不是能
Look who I'm asking!
看我在问谁啊
It was great meeting you,sport. ciao.
见到你很高兴 再见
And you were worried.
你还瞎担心呢
The good news is that a substantial amount of royalties
好消息是 有一大笔版税
Is gonna come in in the next couple of months.
几个月之内就要进账了
Great. problem solved. let's go out to dinner.
太好了 问题解决了 我们去吃饭
no,problem not solved. but I'm hungry.
问题还没解决 我饿了
Get used to it.
习惯一下吧
It's going to take a while to pay off all the bills your accountant
支付你会计"忘记"支付的账单
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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