好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S01E07
Part 1
Nov. 17, 2020, 11:58 a.m.
I have my own room at Mom's house too.
我在妈妈家有自己的房♥间
My dad doesn't.
爸爸却没有
His stuff's in the garage.
他的东西全都在车♥库♥里
Do you know how to play Vampire Hunter? Cos I just got it.
你知道怎么玩"吸血鬼猎人"吗? 我才刚弄懂
No,sorry.
对不起 不知道
You got to chop off their heads. Otherwise they'll keep coming at you.
你得砍掉它们的头 否则还会再来追你
Do you know where your Uncle keeps the paper towels?
你知道你叔叔把卫生纸放哪里吗?
I think there's some up there.
可能在那上面
Woah.
哇哦
Woah.
哇
Hi,you must be Alan. I'm Cindy.
嗨 你一定是艾伦吧 我是辛迪
Hi. Uh,hey,Jake,it's time to get dressed.
杰克 该整理好出门了
Wait a minute.
等一下
Can you get me a bowl from that top shelf?
能帮我拿下顶层架子的碗吗?
Come on,let's go.
快点 走了
What happened to "breakfast is the most important meal of the day"?
不是都说早餐是一天当中最重要的一顿饭?
Just go get dressed.
快去穿衣服
Charlie,there is a half naked woman in our kitchen.
查理 厨房♥里有个半裸的女人
Which half?
哪半是裸的?
Hey Cindy.
嘿 辛迪
Hey Charlie. How you doing?
嘿 查理 最近好吗?
Not bad. How about yourself?
还行吧 你呢?
Thanks again.I'll see you soon.
非常好 再次谢谢你 以后见
Anytime. Bye.
随时奉陪 拜拜
“How you doing?” “Thanks again”?
"最近好吗?" "再次谢谢?"
Charlie,casual sex is one thing but this is just lazy.
查理 你们一♥夜♥情♥之后 就这两句话?
What are you talking about? I didn't have sex with her.
你在说些什么? 我没和她做♥爱♥
She just surfs out on the Point,uses my shower and goes to work.
她只是刚刚冲浪完 顺便来洗了个澡 然后就去上班了
So,you're not sleeping with her?
那么 你没和她睡觉咯?
Jeez,Alan,I don't sleep with every buff surfer chick that uses my shower.
天哪 艾伦 我并不是和每一个冲浪后用我浴室的女人睡觉的
What kind of guy do you think I am?
你把我当成什么人了?
I think you're the luckiest bastard to walk the face of the earth,
我以为你是这个地球上最幸运的混♥蛋♥
but that's not my point.
这不是主要的
I don't want women flashing their butt tattoos at my son.
我是不想有女人把她屁♥股♥上的纹身给我儿子看到
Cindy has a tattoo?
辛迪有纹身?
Yes,a butterfly.
是的 蝴蝶
Huh. Right cheek or left?
左边还是右边?
No,wait,don't tell me.
不 等等 别告诉我
I want to be surprised.
我想来个惊喜
So,you're not sleeping with her but you want to?
那你是说你虽没和她睡觉但是你想?
Well,yea.
恩 是的
What kind of guy do you think I am?
你把我当成什么人了?
Charlie,when I moved in here,
查理 我搬进来的时候
I said that it was vital that we create a wholesome atmosphere for Jake.
就告诉过你 为杰克创造一个健康的成长环境非常重要
And you said “I understand”.
而且你说"我明白"
Alan,there's something you should know about me.
艾伦 你必须了解一些关于我的规则
When I say I understand,it doesn't mean I agree.
当我说"我明白" 并不代表我同意
It doesn't mean I understand.
也不代表我明白
It doesn't even mean I'm listening.
更不代表我在听
Then why do you say it?
那你为什么要说呢?
It seems to make people happy and that's what I'm all about.
因为能使人们高兴 这就是我的目的
Well,that's very altruistic,
哦 你真是太无私了
but I would prefer if you'd just be straight with me.
但是我更喜欢你对我坦白说
Fine.
好吧
All I'm asking is that you keep in mind that
我只想你记住
we have an impressionable 10 year old boy living here.
一个10岁而且易受影响的男孩在与我们同住
I understand. Thank you.
我明白 谢谢
That sounds nice.
弹得很不错
Thanks.
谢谢
So,where are Jake and Alan today?
杰克和艾伦去哪了?
Uh,Jake's at school and Alan's at work.
杰克在学校 艾伦上班去了
It's just you and me.
就只剩了我和你
Well,tell them I said hi. Thanks again for the shower.
向他们问好 再次谢谢你给我用浴室
You bet.
别客气
You look really nice. Thank you. Bye.
你看起来非常漂亮 谢谢你 再见
Yea,I got work to do.
好 我也得上班了
Oh Charlie,seeing you strike out like that just makes me love you more.
查理 看着你受打击的样子让我更爱你了
Rose,you've got to get a hobby.
罗斯 你应该找个爱好
Oh,I've got a hobby.
是的 我已经有了个爱好了
I thought we agreed we were just friends.
我觉得我们已经说好了只做朋友
We are. We’re friends who slept together once
是啊 是一起睡过一次的朋友
and then one friend never called the other friend
而且之后一个朋友再没打电♥话♥给另一个朋友
but luckily,the other friend forgave him.
但幸运的是 另一个朋友原谅了他
Where are you going?
你要去哪儿?
To make my friend a grilled cheese sandwich.
为我的朋友做焗芝士三文治
Rose,Rose,I don't want a grilled cheese sandwich.
罗斯 罗斯 我不想吃焗芝士三文治
Would you prefer a quesadilla?
那墨西哥炸面饼呢?
That sounds nice.
听起来不错
But then you have to leave.
但等会儿你还是得离开
Hey Judith,Alan's at work.
嘿朱蒂丝 艾伦上班去了
I know where Alan is. I came to talk to you.
我知道 我来是找你的
Me? But you don't like me?
我? 但你并不怎么喜欢我啊?
I don't.
是不喜欢
I like you.
但我喜欢你
Jake's fourth grade class was given a simple assignment.
杰克的四年级班布置了一个很简单的作业
Draw something interesting you see around the house.
画一些你房♥子周围有趣的东西
One child drew a record player,
有个小孩画了电唱机
another drew a parrot.
有个人画了只鹦鹉
My son drew this.
可我儿子画了这个
A woman's behind with a butterfly tattoo.
一个女人的屁♥股♥上有一只蝴蝶纹身
On the right cheek.
在右臀上
I'll have to just act surprised.
看来我只有假装惊喜了
I asked him where he saw this,
我问他在哪里看到的
he said “In Uncle Charlie's kitchen.”
他说:"在查理叔叔的厨房♥."
Well,you gotta admit,it beats the hell out of a parrot.
你得承认 这对画鹦鹉的人的确是个不小的打击
Charlie,I am not in the mood.
拜托查理 我现在没心情跟开玩笑
Hold that thought.
等一下
I got it. Hello?
我来接 你好?
Are you in for your mother?
你妈妈的电♥话♥ 接不接?
Charlie's in a meeting right now.
查理正在开会
But you can talk to me. Heck,I feel like we're practically related.
有什么事你可以跟我说 我觉得咱俩都快成母女了
Is that the girl in the picture?
那就是画中的女孩?
Rose?
罗斯?
No,she doesn't have a tattoo on her butt.
不是 她屁♥股♥上没有纹身
I'm guessing.
我猜的
Look,I don't care what you do in your private time
听着 我不在乎你的私生活
but when my son is here,I expect you to clean up your act.
但是在我儿子面前 我希望你能端正自己的行为
I understand.
我明白了
I don't like coming over here and being the bad guy,but I have to protect my son.
我并不是想来扮红脸 但我得保护我儿子
I understand.
我明白了
It's hard enough going through this transition all by myself.
我自己一个人真的很难熬过这个过渡时期
Alan,at least,has you.
艾伦至少还有你陪着
I have no one. Except my parents
我没有任何人陪 除了我父母
and they're completely toxic.
不过他们使情况更糟
I understand.
我也明白
Do you?
真的吗?
I think I do.
我认为是的
Thank you. That means a lot to me.
谢谢你 这对于我来说很重要
I mean,I've always been the good daughter or the good wife,
我过去总想做个好女儿好太太
and you know what?
但是你知道吗?
Outside of those relationships,I don't know who I am.
如果没有这两个称谓 我不清楚自己到底是谁
Am I gay? Am I straight?
我是同性恋? 还是异性恋?
Who the hell knows?
谁他妈的知道呢?
I'm scared about this Charlie,and I'm totally alone.
这一切真的令我恐惧 我孤身一人
I,well,you know what?
我 这个 你知道吗?
I understand.
我明白的
Thank you for listening.
谢谢你愿意倾听
Oh,hey…
嘿...
I'm so sorry to take up your time with all of this.
我很抱歉占用了你的时间
Hey…
嘿...
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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