杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S06E17
Part 1
Nov. 20, 2020, 3:29 p.m.
Welcome, everyone, to big dinner, where the news is big,
欢迎各位出席大聚餐 这里的八卦很大
and the dinner is regular size.
但菜肴分量很正常
Not to be confused with big supper,
不要跟大晚餐混淆了哦
where we eat dinner and we watch the movie Big.
那个是我们边吃晚餐边看电影《飞越未来》
The movie about a grown woman
就是一个成年女性
who has sex with a little boy? What?
上了一个小男孩的那个电影吗 什么
She didn't know.
她并不知道他那么小
Tonight we gather to celebrate Jess and I's
今晚我们齐聚一堂 庆祝我和杰茜
final weekend inside the chrysalis
被困在职业表现平庸这个蛹的
of professional mediocrity before Monday,
最后一个周末
when we burst forth in fully pupated positions.
到周一 我们将破茧而出
Principal Day. Director of...
戴校长 非电视...
non-television, non-radio west coast marketing.
非电台渠道西海岸营销总监
And Principal Day.
还有戴校长
Sorry. I should have waited till the end.
抱歉 我应该等你一起说完的
What's "pupatated"? Okay.
"破贱"是什么玩意 好了
It's time for the rites of passage.
是时候举♥行♥成长仪式了
Ding, ding, ding. I have some big dinner
叮叮叮 我也有自己的大聚餐八卦
news of my own. Winston, sit down!
要宣布 温斯顿 坐下
The topics for big dinner have already been decided.
大聚餐的话题已经决定好了
As you all know, Aly and I have recently become engaged.
你们都知道 我和艾丽最近订婚了
I receive all that love, and then I give it right back.
我收到大家给我的爱 然后回赠给大家
Anyway, as we were saying...
好了 我们刚刚说到
I got to finish this. It's really important.
我要说完 这段话很重要
In order to get married,
为了跟她结婚
I have commenced divorce proceedings
我已经跟我老婆
with my wife...
在办离婚
Rhonda, yeah. Rhonda.
兰达嘛 兰达
Ding, ding, ding, ding. Real quick.
叮叮叮叮 插一句
I hate Rhonda.
我讨厌兰达
Hey, that's my wife!
那可是我老婆
Such a good Harrison Ford.
学哈里森·福德学得蛮像的
Who you married as a prank.
你跟她结婚是为了整人
Which, for the record, no one gets.
说真的 我们都笑不出来
Ding, ding, ding, ding. What the hell is going on here?
叮叮叮叮 这场面到底怎么回事
If everybody's jumping in, I'm gonna jump in.
如果大家都插话 那我也要
Reagan says my room looks stupid,
里根说我的房♥间好傻气
like a teenager lives there. She's correct.
像初中生的房♥间 她说得对
No one's authorized to ding, ding, ding except for Schmidt and I.
除了施密特和我 没人有权利叮叮叮
And you you're not supposed to say "Ding, ding, ding"
而且敲杯子叮叮叮的时候
when you ding, ding, ding.
嘴巴不用说"叮叮叮"
Guys, please.
各位 拜托
These are all common topics.
这些都是普通话题
This is why I proposed common lunch, but nobody showed up.
所以我才提议办普通午餐 但根本没人来
Don't yell at us 'cause you guys are freaking out
不要朝我们大声吼 你们只是为了新工作
about your new jobs. I am not freaking out.
在抓狂 我没有抓狂
I have been preparing for this job
我一直在为这份工作做准备
ever since I was young enough to believe
从我还是个相信世界上有
Leprechauns were real.
小矮妖的宝宝就开始了
Leprechauns are real.
真的有小矮妖
Yeah, I caught one. He caught one.
对啊 我捉过一只 他捉过
We're not having the freaking leprechaun debate
我们现在才不要讨论有没有小矮妖
right now; we'll be here for hours.
那可会没完没了
Leprechauns are real.
真的有小矮妖
Now, it's time for the rites of passage.
现在该举♥行♥成长仪式了
Finally.
总算开始了
Schmidt,
施密特
I present to you a new set of business cards.
我为你呈献新名片
All right.
好的
So proud of you.
为你骄傲
Okay.
好了
That took a lot less time than I thought it would.
这过程比我预期的要短好多
All right.
好吧
And now the donning
现在为你穿上
of the principal's blazer.
校长外套
Oh, the principal's blazer.
校长外套呀
I remember when you got that ten years ago
我记得你十年前买♥♥它的时候
and promised you would never wear it
许诺过 在你真的成为校长之前
till you were actually principal.
绝对不会穿
Principal Day.
戴校长
You okay? I don't think it fits.
你没事吧 好像不合身
No, no, you look great. Everything looks perfect to me.
不会啊 很好看 我看着挺完美的啊
Looks great. Are you okay, honey?
很好看 你没事吧 亲爱的
I'm okay.
我没事
It's the middle of the night.
现在可是半夜
Yeah, just making a few, uh, minor adjustments.
我知道 只是在稍微改一下
Have you seen my scissors?
你有没有看到我的剪刀在哪儿
Never mind. I have 32 seam rippers right here.
算了 我已经有32把拆线刀了
Are you okay?
你还好吧
It's gonna be fine.
会没事的
Hey, Schmidt. Can I get a second opinion on something?
施密特 有件事能问问你的意见吗
Oh, about your room? Reagan's right.
你的房♥间吗 里根说得对
You need to redecorate.
你得重新装饰一下
It looks like you live in an abandoned day care.
现在看着就像个废弃的托儿所
That is not what an abandoned day care looks like.
废弃的托儿所才不是长这样
You can trust me.
你可以相信我
Hello?
有人吗
Can I take a nap now?
我可以睡了吗
Okay, we need to talk about that a lot more later.
好吧 这事现在完全不着急
I'm worried about Jess.
我很担心杰茜
I think she is freaking out about work
她为工作感到很焦虑抓狂
and she's channeling all of it into her blazer.
她把那些负面情绪发泄到那件外套上了
She's got a real "Cat in a bathtub" vibe.
她现在就像"浴缸里的猫"那么焦虑
Hey, guys!
两位好呀
I'm just blasting some Jock Jams,
我正听着舞曲
getting my fashion on!
激发着我的时尚灵感
What's the problem? This is Jess at a six.
怎么回事 早上六点的杰茜可不是这样
Sorry there, Jess.
不好意思 杰茜
Nick here says you're freaking out.
尼克说你在抓狂
What's going on, girl?
怎么了 妹子
I am so good.
我很好
I am "Saw" Good.
我很"吼"
I am so "Gawd." So "Gawd."
真的很"吼" 超"吼"
We can't let her go to work on Monday like that.
我们不能让她周一这个样子去上班
Remember what I used to do for you in college
记不记得以前上大学 你为考试焦虑时
when you'd get nervous about exams?
我如何帮你消除压力
What did I do for you? What was that thing called?
我为你做什么了 那个叫什么来着
Boy ride! Rumspringa!
疯玩 放飞自我
What? Rumspringa.
什么 放飞自我
I said "Rumspringa."
我说"放飞自我"
So did I. No, you said "Boy ride."
我也这么说的 不 你说"疯玩"
No, I said "Rumspringa."
不 我说"放飞自我"
What's a boy ride, dude?
"疯玩"是什么
Rumspringa, boy ride. Boy ride saved my life.
放飞自我 疯玩都一样 疯玩拯救了我
I would be freaking out, and you would take me
我焦虑的时候 你就会带我去
on these wild adventures.
疯狂大冒险
Bio exam?
生物考试
Casino time. Yeah.
赌场时刻 对
Intro to environmental feminism?
针对环境女权主义的介绍
I remember. Corn maze.
我记得 玉米迷宫
That was the day we found out that corn is maize.
就是那天我们发现玉米是黄色的
Do we take Jess on a little rumspringa?
让杰茜试试"放飞自我"怎么样
Can you just give me, like,
在兰达来之前
A five-minute warning before Rhonda gets here?
你能提前五分钟提醒我吗
I'd like to be... not here.
我想要 离开这里
Look, Rhonda shows up when Rhonda shows up.
听着 兰达在该来的时候就来了
I know. That's the problem.
我知道 这就是问题所在
There's nothing I hate more than women talking about
没什么比女人高声炫耀她们的戒指
their rings in a high-pitched voice,
更招人烦了
but, oh, my God,
但是 天哪
杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl
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