杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl S06E08
Part 4
Nov. 20, 2020, 3:27 p.m.
I'm about to gift your brains to pieces.
我要让你们打心里喜欢
You got to real pull-the-rip-cord-while-still-in-the-plane
你现在营造的氛围就像是
kind of vibe, Nick.
在飞机里打开降落伞一样尴尬 尼克
It's a little something from me... to you.
是把我身上的一部分送给你们
All right. Or, more accurately,
好啊 说得更准确一点
on me.
是在我身上
Check it out.
来看看吧
I got the best gift.
我给你们最好的礼物
It is your faces,
这是你们的脸
but it's not your bodies.
不过身体不是
I didn't have a full body shot so...
我没有你们的全身照 所以
They picked the bodies.
他们拼了两个身体
Is that Pretty Woman? This is from the movie
那是漂亮女人吗 灵感来自电影
Pretty Woman and it's on me forever.
《漂亮女人》 它会在我身上留一辈子
Say something.
说点什么
Say something.
说点什么
It-it's cute, it's really cute.
很可爱 真挺可爱的
I really did it.
我真去做了
Talk to me about how happy you are.
告诉我你们现在有多开心
It's on me forever.
它可是要在我身上留一辈子
I know we're on you forever and ever,
我知道我们会一直在你身上
until you're buried in a non-Jewish cemetery.
直到你被埋在一个非犹太教的坟墓
And now we-we owe you a...
我们现在欠你
A thank you card. Just don't know
一个感谢卡 就是不知道
where I'm gonna find the words to express
我该用哪些词来表达
all of the emotions that I'm feeling right now.
我此时此刻心里的所有情绪
I can't find anything about you online, James.
我在网上查不到你 詹姆斯
Not even the darknet.
即使是在暗网上
Oh, I was gonna say, you checked the darknet, yeah?
我还想说 你还查了暗网呀
I'm usually on there, they usually got some stuff about me.
我经常上暗网 他们总是对我指指点点
Hey! Oh, thank god.
你们好 谢天谢地
Jess... Ica Day.
杰茜...卡·戴
I can't believe you guys are all at my favorite restaurant.
不敢相信你们都聚在我最喜欢的餐厅
Hey, does anyone have a red landscaping truck?
你们谁有红色的景观卡车吗
'cause it's getting towed.
因为它要被拖走了
Anyone? Red landscaping truck?
谁的 红色景观卡车
No, mine's white.
不 我的是白色的
Well, it could be white.
也可能是白色的
It's getting towed.
正在被拖走
I-I did take the red one today.
我今天确实开的是红色的那辆
Yeah, can't let that get towed.
不能让他们拖走
My crew is napping in the back. Yup.
我的伙计还在后面打盹儿呢 没错
Well... Hey.
你们好
This is an unexpected treat.
这真是出人意料的一顿饭
Well, I'm happy to have ran into you.
我挺高兴遇到你们的
Because, um... I've been thinking,
因为我一直在想
And...
还有
I'm cancelling the demathlon.
我打算取消数学全能训练
Really?
真的吗
Yeah.
没错
But I thought you loved the math decathlon?
可我觉得你很喜欢这个事的
It's a holdover from my old public school days.
那是我以前在公立学校遗留的做法
It's unnecessarily competitive.
它过于强调竞争性 很没必要
Old habits die hard.
旧习难改
That's true, you know,
这话没错
I still eat a ton of meat
我依然会吃很多的肉
and I've been vegetarian for years.
而我已经素食很多年了
Like, a ton.
真的是很多
A ton of meat.
很多肉
I mean, I didn't realize you were so amenable.
我没意识到你还挺知错就改的
Hey, actually,
事实上
Samanthia loves puppets.
萨曼莎很喜欢木偶
What would you say if I asked you
如果我要求你把口♥技♥加入课程
to introduce ventriloquism into the curriculum?
你会怎么说
And do less math?
数学少一点
I'd say...
我会说
You got it!
没问题
Great.
太棒了
Sincerely.
真诚地
Sincerely.
真诚地
"Dear Nick, thanks for the tattoo.
"亲爱的尼克 感谢你的纹身
Sincerely, S and Cece." You guys hate my gift?
真诚地 S和希希" 你们讨厌我的礼物吗
No, we don't hate it, we love it,
我们不讨厌它 我们很喜欢
I see it every time I blink.
我每次眨眼都能看到它
You guys want to see it? It's okay.
你们想看吗 不用了
Ah, I'll show it anyhow.
不管怎样我都要把它露出来
Check it out. There's an ingrown hair
快来看 这是嵌上去的头发
that gives Cece a bit of a Rudolph nose.
让希希的鼻子看起来像是驯鹿的
And when I flex my feet
我曲起腿时
it makes you guys fatter. Look.
你们会变胖 瞧
Fat, look how fat your face looks, Schmidt.
超胖 看你的脸多肥啊 施密特
You have the fattest face in the world.
简直全宇宙最肥
All right, stop it! Stop the horror!
好了 停 别再吓人了
We hate the gift. It's disgusting.
我们讨厌这礼物 超恶心
It is disgusting.
真的很恶心
You've ruined your leg.
你把自己的腿给毁了
It is like you stole our souls.
就好像你偷走了我们的灵魂一样
You depicted my wife as a common street whore.
你把我老婆画得像个站街女
Fine, you don't want it?
好吧 你们不想要这礼物吗
You can't have it.
那你们也得不到
I'll get it removed and we can go about our lives
我去找人洗掉 一周后
again in a week.
我们就恢复正常生活
You know it costs, like, two grand
你知道洗刺青要两千块
and takes a year or something, right?
还得花一年 对吧
Well, I did not know that.
这我倒是不知道
Okay?
好吗
I didn't know that.
我并不知道
Well, that really sucks for me.
我可真惨啊
But fine, then that's your present.
既然这样 还是送给你们好了
That's not a present. Look Nick,
这可不是礼物 尼克
I appreciate you trying to do something meaningful for us,
你想送个有意义的礼物 我很感激
but just give us the blender you bought.
不过 直接送你那台搅拌机就行了
Well, the jokes on you, I burnt out the motor
尴尬了吧 我做泡泡糖奶昔时
making a bubble gum smoothie.
把发动机给弄坏了
You're back on the registry then. I won't do it!
那你还是从礼物清单里选吧 我才不要
It's a list made by robots. Idiot!
那清单是机器人写的 白♥痴♥
Trying to get me something meaningful!
想给我选个有意义的礼物
The only thing meaningful to me
最有意义的就是
is the blender!
那台搅拌机啊
Remember to bring your pets
记得下周带上你们的宠物
to school next week for human zoo day.
来学校参加"人类动物园日"
Yeah.
好的
Oh, and I'd also like to let everyone know that
我还想告诉大家
we are switching back from this soap to this soap, okay?
我们要把自动洗手液机换回手动的
So just be aware.
跟大家说一声
Next,
下面
I would like to offer my personal endorsement
我想支持杰西卡·戴
of Jessica Day as our next principal.
成为我们下一任校长
All right, well, first, I'd love to open up the floor
首先 我愿意回答各位的提问
to questions. Anybody?
有人要提问吗
Oh, wow, okay.
好吧
Can you get rid of the white lines in the parking lot?
你能把停车场的白线去掉吗
They're very restricting. I think they're for...
太限制了 我想那是用来...
Shouldn't we designate the green space
我们不是应该把那片绿地
for Europeanstyle football? And for tofu Tuesday,
用来踢欧式足球吗 周二豆腐日
can we get a more balanced juice pairing?
能不能配更均衡的果汁
Didn't think I'd ever see you again.
还以为再也不会见到你了
I came to say good-bye.
我是来道别的
Asher and I are moving to Colorado.
亚瑟和我要搬去科罗拉多州
Is that where Aly lives? No.
艾丽住在那里吗 不是
杰茜驾到（2011）
New Girl
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