美式主妇

American Housewife S02E01

Part 1 Feb. 16, 2020, 9:30 a.m.

你做到了凯蒂
You did it, Katie.
你熬过了暑假
You made it through the summer.
妈
Mom?
这些孩子已经在你面前连着
These kids have been up in your face
蹦跶了68天
for 68 days in a row.
现在你可以让他们处于
And now you get to place them in the custody
西港公立学校的监护下
of the Westport public school system.
妈
Mom!
妈你在哪里
Mom! Where are you?
好像你是监狱长
It's like you're a warden,
现在把这些流氓转到另一个监狱
and you're transferring these delinquents to another prison.
你只需要把他们送去就行
All you have to do is get them there.
来吧
Let's do this.
妈说两句
Mom, a word.
不行得上学
No words. We've gotta get to school.
-妈 -不行
- Mom -- - No.
但我还没开口问
But I didn't even ask anything yet.
要么太贵要么我没时间
It's either too expensive or I don't have time.
-妈 -你不能养狗
- Mom? - You cannot have a dog.
你这次没骂脏话看来态度软化了
You didn't swear this time! You're softening.
格雷格
Greg!
能帮我找车钥匙吗
Can you help me find my car keys?
你怎么会经常乱放东西
How do you manage to constantly misplace --
可能现在谈这个时机不对
There's probably a better time for that talk.
我帮你找
I'll help you look.
妈我的紧身裤又抽丝了
Mom, I got another run in my tights.
我现在在真正的芭蕾学校
I'm in a real ballet academy now.
老天给我买♥♥条名牌裤子吧
For God's sake, buy a boy a decent pair of Danskins!
妈两周后我就要考驾照了
Mom, my driver's license test is in two weeks,
我需要有人带我练习
and I need someone to take me out to practice.
没有车钥匙开不了车
Can't drive without car keys.
大家散开
Everyone fan out.
妈我需要看上去很专业
Mom, I need to look professional.
我通过芭蕾进哈佛的计划可能落空
My plan of getting into Harvard through ballet could be lost,
只因为没有合适的紧身连衣裤
all for the want of a proper leotard.
我抽烟和每晚
Well, my plan for smoking cigarettes
吃外卖♥♥的计划也因为你落空了
and eating takeout every night was ruined by you,
我们扯平了
so we're even.
我需要你认真对待这个问题
I need you to take this seriously.
我的老师已经第一眼
My teacher has already taken an instant
就非常讨厌我了
and strong dislike to me.
我那个有着
What happened to my little boy
动人小女孩声音的儿子到哪里去了
with the beautiful little girl's voice?
-妈 -妈
- Mom. - Mom!
什么事
What?!
看这张柯基犬打扮成香蕉的照片
Look at this picture of a corgi dressed as a banana!
别骗我你知道很可爱
Don't play me. You know it's cute.
你选了课外活动吗
Have you picked your after-school activity yet?
我跟你说过我一个也不参加
I told you, I'm not doing one.
格雷格
Greg!
安娜凯特参与其中很有趣
Anna-Kat, it's fun to be involved.
现在新学年开始我等不及
Now that school's started, I can't wait to be part
再次成为回收委员会的一员和会员们一起
of the recycling committee again and hang with my crew.
你是指清洁工吗
You mean the janitors?
还有比尔·多提
And Bill Doty.
你们哪里有散开
You guys, worst fan-out of all time.
去我没找过的地方找
Look for my keys in a place that I'm not already looking.
泰勒你的暑假活动表拿了吗
Taylor, do you got your summer packet?
拿了没做
Yeah, I have it. I just didn't do it.
你知道你在跟虎妈说话吧
You realize you're talking to the mean parent, right?
听我说
Just hear me out.
我已经决定了我不上大学
I've decided... I'm not going to college.
格雷格
Greg!
泰勒你要上大学
Taylor, you are going to college --
可能上不了好大学但要上大学
probably not a good college, but college.
我觉得这不适合我
I just don't think it's right for me.
浪费我的时间和你的钱
I mean, it's a waste of my time and your money.
这由不得你决定
Well, that's not your call to make.
在你完成暑期活动前
So, until you finish your summer packet,
你不能开车
you're not gonna start driving.
等等格雷格
Hold up! Greg.
别瞎说
Stop fooling around.
你当然可以开车
Of course you're gonna start driving.
你♥爸♥会教你
And your father's going to teach you.
你能穿一件
Can you go put on a shirt
不像餐厅暴露制♥服♥的衣服吗
that doesn't look like it's Hooter-issued?
找我的钥匙
And look for my keys.
不是说好永远不要在
Whatever happened to "Never overruling
孩子面前否决另一个人的意见
one another in front of the kids"?
你想毁了我的精密计划
You are ruining my master plan.
你拉着我去看的
Master plans are for villains
超级英雄电影中的坏人才需要精密计划
in the superhero movies you drag me to,
声称我想看的艺术电影
claiming the art-house films I want to see
不知怎地播放时间都不合适
are somehow always playing at "Bad times."
你不明白我今年的拼车计划
You do not understand my carpool schedule this year.
2点45 我在学校接奥利弗和安娜凯特
At 2:45, I pick up Oliver and Anna-Kat from school.
然后我送奥利弗去诺瓦克上芭蕾课
Then I drive Oliver all the way to Norwalk for ballet lessons
和安娜凯特在车里等40分钟
and wait in the car with Anna-Kat
玩"我看到"的游戏
for 40 minutes, playing "I Spy."
然后接上奥利弗又回去
Then I pick up Oliver again and go all the way back
接打完排球的泰勒
to pick Taylor up from volleyball
然后送所有人回家
and then drive everyone home.
所以我有个三步计划
So, I have a three-pronged plan.
第一步让安娜凯特加入社团
Prong one -- Get Anna-Kat into a club
这样她的时间和泰勒一样
so Taylor and her can be on the same schedule.
第二步奥利弗的芭蕾老师
Prong two -- Oliver's ballet teacher
彻底摧毁他的意志祈祷
breaks his spirits -- fingers crossed --
他退出加入棒球队然后他们三个
he quits, joins baseball, and the three of them
时间安排表完全一样
are on the same schedule at the same time.
-第三步呢 -第三步
- And prong three? - Here's prong three.
-准备好了吗 -当然
- Ready for prong three? - You know it.
泰勒拿到驾照后
When Taylor gets her license,
她能送弟妹上学放学
she can drive them to school and back.
然后我就自♥由♥了
And then I'm free!
你听到了吗格雷格
Do you hear me, Greg?
-自♥由♥ -注意胸毛凯蒂
- Free! Chest hairs, - Katie.
然后我就能从当妈的日子中松口气
And then I can take a step back from mothering,
终于能享受生活追求些爱好
finally enjoy my life and pursue some hobbies,
比如说坐在浴缸里喝红酒
like sitting in the bathtub with a glass of wine.
-这 -这是爱好
- Is that -- - It's a hobby!
不懂就去查
Look it up.
我找到你的钥匙了
I found your keys!
在哪里
Where were they?
这里
Right there.
谁把我的钥匙挂上去的
Who hung my keys on the hook?
如果人们把东西放在正确的位置
How am I supposed to find anything around this house
我还怎么在家里找到东西
if people put things back where they belong?
美式主妇第二季第一集
安娜凯特在单子上挑个社团
Anna-Kat, I need you to pick a club from this list.
在学校多参与很重要
It's important to be involved in school.
如果这么重要你为什么不参与
If it's so important, how come you're not involved?
她说得太有道理了
She makes an interesting point.
这是报复我否决了你吗
Is this payback for overruling you?
-是的 -好吧
- Yes. - Okay.
这样吧你参与我就参与
Tell you what, I'll get involved if you do.
真的吗
Really?
你会在学校做义工就像那些
You're going to volunteer at school like
没有生活爱管闲事的白♥痴♥妈妈一样吗
"All those no-life, busy-body, idiot moms"?
对
Yep.
不过我先得注意以后在你身边的言辞
Right after I start watching how I speak in front of you.
我来做义工