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Modern Family S06E14

Part 2 Nov. 29, 2019, 11:33 a.m.

那提醒了我
Oh, that reminds me --
我该把摄像头安在她房♥间里
I should put on the security camera in her room.
-你拿到了吗 -拿到了
- Did you get it? - Yes.
猜猜他们把最后送来的结婚礼物放在哪里
And guess where they keep the last-minute wedding gifts?
提示一下显然你需要原来的髋关节
Hint -- apparently you need your original hips
才能让睡衣合上
to keep a nightgown closed.
很高兴你们过来了
Well, I'm glad you stopped by.
我真的很需要
I really needed this.
小卡来吧
Oh, Cam, get in here.
我有点鼻塞
Oh, I have a little bit of a sniffle.
来吧
Oh, come on.
这是什么
What's this?
那是...
Uh, that is, um --
送给你和库珀的结婚礼物
That's a wedding gift for you and Cooper,
但我们听说后就觉得这不合适
but once we heard, we didn't think it was appropriate.
你开玩笑吗
Oh, are you kidding?
收礼物就没有不合适的时候
There's no bad time for a gift.
抱歉我们送得太晚了
I'm -- I'm sorry it's so late.
我们只是想送你
We just wanted to get you something
你会珍爱的东西
that you would really cherish.
这是我们送出的最棒的礼物
Pretty much the best gift we've ever given anyone.
是啊这是很漂亮的...
Yeah, it's -- it's a beautiful...
奶酪盘
Cheese plate!
是的看到这异想天开的措辞
Yes, I got that from the...
我就知道了
whimsical phrasing.
你们确定不留下再喝一杯吗
Are you sure you won't stay for one more,
特别是现在我有了这个
especially now since I've got this
时髦的传送奶酪的系统
stylish cheese-delivery system?
-就一杯 -真棒
- Just one, yeah. - Great.
怎么回事
What happened?!
显然有两个包装得很像的礼物
Obviously there were two gifts wrapped similarly,
而我的眼睛里含着泪水
and my eyes were watering
因为那房♥间里充斥着药膏味道
from the thick fog of Vaporub back there.
反正我们现在无所畏惧了
Okay, well, we got nothing to lose now,
回去拿那幅画
so go back and get the painting.
你知道谁送了他那个便宜的东西吗
You know who gave him that cheap thing?
杰玛库斯她赚的第一块钱都还在呢
J'marcus. She's got the first dollar she ever earned --
快去吧
Just go!
桑娅毁了我的情人节之后
Once Sonia blew up my Valentine's Day,
我本可以坐着为自己感到难过
I could have sat around feeling sorry for myself.
但我轻笑了一会儿
Instead, I had a little chuckle,
然后给狗狗买♥♥了礼物
and I got the dog a gift.
我知道这很愚蠢给斯黛拉买♥♥礼物
I know it's silly getting Stella a present...
她的生日快到了
So close to her birthday.
她在吗
Is she around?
我觉得她在楼上的浴室里
I think she's upstairs in the bath.
什么我今早刚给她洗过澡
What? I just gave her a bath this morning.
你说的是斯黛拉
Oh, you're talking about Stella.
等等你给狗狗买♥♥了礼物吗
Wait, you got the dog a gift?
你没资格评判我
Lot of attitude
你的约会对象是一桶冰淇淋
for a guy whose date's a tub of
和一条毛绒绒的睡袍
ice cream and a fuzzy robe.
你简直就像《凯西》漫画里的主人公
You're spending Valentine's Day in a "Cathy" cartoon.
这是干什么
Hey, what's all this?
我还以为我们三个
I thought the three of us
就叫点外卖♥♥呢
were just gonna order something in.
不我已经毁了你们的夜晚
No. I ruined your night enough.
我要给你和歌♥洛莉亚做饭
I'm cooking for you and Gloria
好让你们独自度过浪漫的夜晚
so you can have a romantic evening alone.
桑娅你没必要这样做
Sonia, you don't have to do this.
我想这样
I want to.
为你们准备食物我觉得很开心
It makes me so happy to prepare food for you.
也许以后我也会给自己的老公做饭
Maybe someday I'll be preparing it for a husband of my own.
谢谢你没有笑到在地上打滚
Thank you for not laughing and falling on the floor
我说这种话时我妈妈就会那样做
like my mother does when I say such things.
今天是情人节我...
You know, it being Valentine's Day and all, I, uh --
我给你准备了点东西
I got you a little something.
有要洗的衣服吗
Ooh, laundry?
不
No.
给你
Here.
不行
I can't.
来吧打开
Come on! Open it.
瞧见这个"S"了吗
Here, see that "S" there?
代表桑娅
That's for "Sonia."
杰好漂亮
Oh, Jay, it's so beautiful.
我不知道该怎么...
I don't know what to...
谢谢你
Thank you!
我什么时候会学到教训
When will I learn?
我太吸引小姨子了
I'm catnip to sister-in-laws.
多年前感恩节晚餐时我坐在迪迪的姐姐
Years ago, I was sitting next to Dede's sister Cece
西西旁边
at Thanksgiving dinner,
我对她施展了一些魅力
and I threw a little charm her way.
眨了眨蓝眼睛
You know, flash the baby blues.
我还没反应过来
And before I know it,
她就用12码的脚在我的胫骨上摩擦了
she's rubbing her size 12s up and down my shin.
迪迪发现了
Dede caught her,
走去桌子那边跟她打了起来
went over the table at her.
靠她姐碧碧和我才把她俩分开
It took me and her sister Bebe to separate them.
你在哪里
Hey, where are you?
我都给你打了15分钟的电♥话♥了
I've been trying you for 15 minutes.
我知道会议延迟了
I know. We ran late.
然后车又没法发动
And then the car wouldn't start,
我不得不打给汽车协会
so I had to call AAA.
他们说在来的路上了但谁知道呢
They said they're on their way, but who knows?
我急得满脸冒油
I'm all greasy.
亲爱的我觉得我没法过去了
Oh, honey, I don't think I'm gonna make it.
别生气
Don't be mad.
我很生气
I am mad.
你本该20分钟前到的
You were supposed to be here 20 minutes ago.
这是我们为我俩留出的一夜
This is the one night we set aside for us.
我知道我觉得很糟糕
I know, and I feel terrible,
但是听着喝完酒回家去
but listen, finish your drink, come on home.
也许我们可以过个浪漫的复活节
Maybe we'll have a romantic Easter.
买♥♥单
Check, please.
我听说你妻子的车出了故障
I understand that your wife has had some car trouble.
那是怎么回事啊
I wonder how that could have happened?
我必须说朱莉安娜
I must say, Juliana,
我今晚绝对没想到会在这里见到你
you're the last person I expected to see here tonight.
如果走运的话
Well, with any luck,
你今晚会是我看到的最后一个人
you'll be the last person I do see tonight.
天啊
Oh, my God.
菲尔我注意你好几年了
Phil, I've had my eye on you for years.
我很高兴
I'm just so happy
我们终于能独处一段时间了
we're finally gonna get some alone time.
我没吓到你吧
I'm not scaring you, am I?
恰恰相反
Quite the contrary.
大部分见到我的女人
Most women who meet me
立刻就要求跟我独处
almost instantly ask for some alone time.
抱歉
Excuse me.
该死
Darn it!
我带客户看♥房♥♥的事提前到明早了
My showing was pushed up tomorrow morning.
我也许得早点回去
I-I may have to make it an early one.
你确定吗
Are you sure?
因为你跟我只有一晚上的时间猛虎
'Cause you only have one night with me, tiger,
而我就和
and I'm as flexible
政♥府♥担♥保♥的零首♥付♥
as a government-insured, zero-down,
浮息按揭一样灵活
variable-rate mortgage.
你到底是谁
Who are you?
不如我们离开这里怎么样
What do you say we get out of here?
-你在干什么 -跑快跑
- What are you doing? - Run, run!