摩登家庭
Modern Family S06E13
Part 3
Nov. 29, 2019, 11:33 a.m.
再说一遍 大声点 这里是办公场所
Well, do it again. Louder. This is a place of business.
她必须用布把她那俩球罩上
She needs to throw a tarp over those bounce houses.
爸爸 我觉得你才是无礼的那个人
Dad, I think you're the one who's being offensive.
这是我的公♥司♥ 你搞定她
It's my company. Take care of it.
喂
Hello?
你在哪个狗公园
What dog park are you at?
你也下午好 杰
Good afternoon to you, too, Jay.
斯黛拉和我在牧场
Stella and I are at rancho.
谢天谢地
Thank god.
你要小心好色的松狮狗
Keep your eye out for Randy Chows.
那个花样溜冰运动员吗
The figure skater?
保证斯黛拉的安全就好了
Just keep Stella's safe.
杰 她很好 她玩得很开心
Jay, she's fine. She's having a great time.
等着 我给你发一张
H-here, I'm gonna send you
刚才我给她拍得滑稽照片
a hilarious picture I just took of her.
她从未这么开心过
She's never looked happier.
大概只是对你表示礼貌
Probably just being polite.
你给我看的是什么
What the hell am I looking at?
天呐 我给你发了什么
Oh, god, w-what -- what did I send you?
她脖子上是什么东西
What's that thing around her neck?
那就是条新项圈
Uh, that is just a new collar.
她以前的项圈太旧了
Her old one was looking a little tattered.
你不许给她买♥♥礼物
Don't go buying her presents!
她现在还是我的狗
She's still my dog.
你只是帮我看狗的人
You're a glorified kennel.
那只是我用珠宝装饰的一个小项圈
It's just a fun little collar that I bejeweled.
下一步是什么 你要给她穿上网袜
What's next? You gonna dress her in fishnets,
把她放到阿姆斯特丹的橱窗里吗
put her in a window in Amsterdam?
随意一点就好
Just keep it casual!
天呐 你真是个荡♥妇♥
Oh, my god. You're such a slut.
我爱死了
Oh, I love it.
没什么 我只是带我妹妹
Nothing, I'm just taking my sister
来咖啡店参加大学面试
to a college interview at a coffee shop.
我知道 不是吗
I know, right?
我差点忘了告诉你昨晚发生的事了
Oh, I totally forgot to tell you what happened last night.
丽莎 恩佐和我在回音公园的一个酒吧
Lisa, Enzo, and I were at a bar in Echo Park,
然后恩佐说
and Enzo was like,
"我的梦想就是在道奇体育场跑垒"
"My dream is to run the bases at Dodger Stadium."
于是我说"管他呢 我们这就去吧"
So I'm like, "Screw it, let's do it."
丽莎把头发卷到棒球帽里面
So, Lisa tucks her hair up to a baseball cap,
我们跟看场的人说她是贾斯汀·比伯
and we convince the grounds keeper that she's Justin Bieber
而那个贾斯汀会跟他合影
and that "Justin" will take a picture with him.
居然成功了
And it worked!
不 你闭嘴 这还不是最精彩的部分
No, you shut up! That's not even the best part.
恩佐开始跑垒
Enzo starts running the bases,
他把衣服脱下来扔了出去
and he whips his shirt off.
衣服被丽莎接到了 然后她也脱了衣服
And Lisa gets caught up in it and takes off her shirt,
然后看场人就说
And the grounds keeper's like,
"你不是贾斯汀·比伯"
"Whoa, you're not Justin Bieber."
然后他就开始拿着靶子追我们
So he starts chasing us around with a rake.
我知道
I know!
等等 那是谁
Oh, wait. Who is that?
丹尼丝吗 让那个婊♥子♥来接电♥话♥
Denise? Put that dirty hooker on the phone.
姐妹 我告诉你昨晚发生的事情了吗
Hey, girl. Did I tell you what happened last night?
恩佐说他的梦想就是
So, Enzo said that his dream
在道奇体育场跑垒
was to run the bases at Dodger Stadium,
-我说"管他呢 我们这就去吧" -老天呐
- and I was like, "Screw it, let's do it." - Oh, my god!
你的嘴就不能歇一会儿吗
Do you ever stop talking?!
我坐在这里试图在精神上
I am sitting here trying to mentally prepare
为我一生中最重要的时刻做准备
for one of the most important moments of my life,
能不能麻烦你把嘴闭上
so can you please just shut up?
我知道 不是吗
I know, right? Ohh.
好了 看起来他们要结束了
All right, looks like they're finishing up.
我现在应该进去了
I should probably go in now.
告诉她裙子很可爱 公主娜娜的秋装
Ooh, tell her cute dress -- Nanette Lepore, fall collection.
好极了 我就用"可爱的裙子"开场
Great. I'll open with, "Cute dress."
可爱的裙子
Cute dress.
安迪 离开放日还有36小时
Andy, 36 hours to the open house.
准备好了吗
You ready?
我生来就准备好了
I was born ready.
事实上 那是假的
Actually, that's not true.
我早产了两个月
I was two months premature,
生下来才三斤重
weighed three and a half pounds.
我有点紧张
I'm a little nervous.
只有一个方法来解决...
There's only one way to get over that --
模拟开放日
Mock open house!
倒数计时 五 四...
Starting in five...four...
忘了拿名片
Uh, business card!
你不是安迪
You're not Andy.
抱歉让你失望了
Sorry to disappoint you.
我在这
I'm here!
欢迎 快进来
Welcome. Come on in.
谢谢你
Thank you.
在干什么
What's happening?
我要带邓菲先生
I was about to give Mr. Dunphy here
参观这所漂亮的大房♥子
a tour of this beautiful open house.
我不认识邓菲先生 虽然听起来他很酷
I do not know who Mr. Dunphy is, although he sounds cool.
我只是从图森搬来的帅气的整形医生
I'm just a handsome plastic surgeon relocating from Tucson.
我是他的儿子
And I'm his son.
好主意 假装是我的儿子
Good idea. Pretend to be my son.
这就是厨房♥吗
So, is this the kitchen?
问得好 这就是厨房♥
Great question. Yes, it is.
完全更新成为开放式厨房♥
Fully updated with an open floor plan,
大家庭的完美选择
perfect for large families.
你和你的夫人还有别的孩子吗
Do you and the missus have other kids?
没有 就我一个 所以这有点太大了
Nope, just me, so it's way too big.
你看起来工作能力很差
You seem terrible at your job.
我不知道
I don't know.
你们看起来像是拥有很多朋友的家庭
You seem like a family with a lot of friends.
招待客人的话会很方便
It's great for entertaining.
这里的邻居多元化情况怎么样
How diverse is the neighborhood?
我这样问是因为
I only ask because I'm married
我娶了一位非洲裔的美人
to a beautiful African-American woman.
不能告诉你她是谁
I can't say who,
不过你在《阿凡达》里见过她
but you may know her from "Avatar."
住在这一带的人
This neighborhood has a wonderful mix
来自不同的民族和种族
of different cultures and ethnicities.
-听起来很危险 -卢克
- Ooh, sounds dangerous. - Luke...
你们要知道的就是
Here's all you need to know --
在过去的两年里 这附近的房♥产价值
In the last two years, home values in this neighborhood
已经比城市平均值高了两倍
have increased by twice the city average.
这里很安静 也很安全
It's quiet. It's safe.
我想不到有什么地方比这里
I can't think of a better place
更适合建立一个美丽的混血家庭
to raise a beautiful mixed-race family.
我要跟佐伊简单谈一下
I'm gonna have to have a quick conversation with Zoe,
不过我想你已经卖♥♥出了这套房♥子
but I think you just sold a house.
太好了
Yes!
太好了 终于完了
Good. Is this finally done?
爸爸 我想你和我是不是该
'Cause, dad, I was thinking maybe you and I
穿上燕尾服去劳斯莱斯试驾
could put on tuxedos and test-drive Rolls-Royces.
卢克 对不起 真希望我能去
Aw, Luke, I'm sorry. I wish I could,
不过我已经答应安迪教他怎么系领带了
but I already promised Andy I'd teach him how to tie a tie.
来吧伙计 我有首系领带的小曲子教给你
Come on, buddy. I got a song and everything.
我必须要告诉你
I have to let you know,
我的脖子特别怕痒
my neck is extraordinarily ticklish.
是真的吗
You don't say.
你敢
Don't you dare.
不要 不要
Don't. Don't!
-快过来 -不 不要
- Get over here! - No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no!
很高兴见到你 吉塔
It was so nice to meet you, Gita.
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