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你还真是问了不少问题呢
to work with pageant clients.
-你♥爸♥知道你这么做吗 -鲍勃 滚开
- Does your dad know you do that? - Back off, Bob!
我到底该怎么跟我妈说我想去做人流
How the hell am I going to tell my mom that I want an abortion,
并且还需要她签字同意
and that I need her to sign off?
克里斯蒂安呢 你告诉他了吗
What about Christian? Have you told him yet?
我不知道该说什么
I don't know what to say.
你在做什么
What are you doing?
写一条短♥信♥
Drafting a text.
"你好 我是帕蒂 我怀孕了 而且"
"Hey, it's Patty. I'm knocked up and..."
-糟了 -什么 什么糟了
- Oops. - What? Oops what?
-你不小心发出去了吗 -逗你玩呢
- Did you accidentally send it? - Psych.
-你真是个混♥蛋♥ -而且你可想我了
- You're an asshole. - And you missed me.
我超级超级想你
I super, super did.
我们这样合适吗
Oh! Hey, is this, like, okay?
我的意思是 你知道的 因为
I mean, you know, because the...
没事的
It's fine.
所以 你彻底原谅我了吗
So, you're totally over me?
-这样不会很奇怪吗 -不会
- It isn't weird? - No.
一点都不奇怪
It's like the opposite of weird.
太棒了
Awesome.
因为我想让你在这过夜
'Cause I wanted to ask you to sleep over,
但是我不想让这变得奇怪
but I didn't want it to be weird.
但是既然我知道这不奇怪了 你能留下来吗
But now that I know that it's not, can you?
我今天不想孤身一人
I don't want to be alone today.
当然
Sure.
当然可以
Absolutely.
-好的 你知道吗 -什么
- Okay, you know what? - Hmm?
这很奇怪
It is weird.
什么 为什么
What? Why?
因为你在我上面
Because you're on top of me.
而且我知道这不意味着什么
And I know it doesn't mean anything,
但是我的身体有反应 而且我
but my body doesn't, and I just...
明天的热狗卷饼开业典礼见 好吗
I'll see you tomorrow at the Wiener Taco opening, okay?
我爸雇鲍勃·用下半身思考·巴纳德时
I was furious at my father
我对他生气极了
for hiring Bob "Balls for Brains" Barnard.
但是我没法在他手术的前夕跟他对峙
But I couldn't confront him on the eve of his surgery,
于是 我选择专注于打开科拉莉的心扉
so instead, I chose to focus on opening up Coralee's heart.
探索她的肩膀 髋屈肌和脖子
And her shoulders, and her hip flexors, and her neck.
闻起来不错
Smells great.
红酒焖鸡 科拉莉的最爱
Coq au vin, it's Coralee's favorite.
最近我俩的关系有点紧张
Things lately between us have been a little tense.
鲍勃 我稍微来早了点
Hello, Bob? I'm here, but I'm a little early.
抱歉
Sorry about that.
你这是干什么
What's all this?
尚恩
Shane?
他在这又是干什么
What's he doing here?
我给你预订了推拿按♥摩♥
I booked you a massage.
我做了晚饭 买♥♥了花
And I cooked dinner and got flowers.
我们看来得好好谈一谈
Okay, I thought we were gonna talk.
是该谈谈 我想让你知道我有多在乎你
We are. I just... I wanted to show you how much I care.
你觉得给我做顿饭
Do you think that wining and dining me
就能让我原谅你吗
is gonna make me forget about everything?
-因为... -只能暂时弥补 鲍勃
- Because... - It's a Band-Aid, Bob.
-没人问你 尚恩 -我只是实话实说
- Nobody asked you, Shane. - I'm just saying.
我即将成为持照人生导师
I'm getting certified to be a life coach,
修复任何问题的第一步就是坦诚
and the first step in resolving any problem is radical honesty.
所以你俩坐下...
So if you two were to sit--
尚恩 麻烦你收拾收拾走吧
Shane, please pack up your stuff and go.
-要不我也走了吧 -别别别
- You know what? Maybe I should go, too. - No, don't. Don't.
不要走
Please don't.
给我次机会
Give me a chance.
-你要怎么支付 -尚恩 滚
- So are you gonna Venmo me? - Shane, get out!
行吧 感谢你点我名
Okay, no. Thank you very much, I appreciate it.
怎么说呢
You know what?
尚恩说的好像有点道理
Maybe that Shane did have a point.
彻底坦诚
Complete radical honesty.
-问吧 -行吧 斯黛拉·罗斯
-Ask me anything. - Okay, Stella Rose.
什么时候断的
Uh, when did it end?
-二十年前 -什么原因
- Twenty years ago. - Why?
你怀了小凯
You were pregnant, with Cat.
她逼你和我离婚了吗
Did she ask you to leave me?
逼了
Yes.
你考虑过吗
Did you consider?
-考虑过 -操♥你♥妈♥ 鲍勃
- Yes. - Fuck you, Bob.
你不是说要坦诚吗
I'm being radically honest.
我想让你信任我
I want you to trust me.
信任你 我恨你
Trust you? I hate you.
那就好 说明你还在乎我
Good. That means you still care.
你俩做得爽吗
How was the sex?
可以
Good.
可以 还是很爽
Good, or great?
-与众不同 -把细节讲清楚
- Different. - Oh, please explain in detail.
她喜欢角色扮演 有点轻微BDSM
She was into role-playing and light BDSM.
打屁♥股♥吗
Like spanking?
对 还有其他的
Yeah. And other stuff,
捆绑 深喉
like bondage, and choking,
还有窒息
and breath-play.
窒息他妈是什么玩意儿 鲍勃
What the fuck is breath-play, Bob?
你一个人的时候会想她吗
Do you think about her when you're alone?
有时候
Sometimes.
你和我在一起的时候会想她吗
Do you think about her when you're with me?
-现在不会了 -你爱她吗
- Not anymore. - Did you love her?
爱过 很久以前了
I did. Once. A long time ago.
你爱她胜过爱我吗
Did you love her more than you loved me?
从没有
Never.
那她给了你什么我做不到的
Then what did she give you that I couldn't?
她... 欣赏我
She... appreciated the parts of me
不为你接受的一面
that you just don't understand.
她看到了真实的我
She-- She saw me.
我也看得到你呀
Well, I see you.
我知道你有多想冲我翻白眼
No, I know how you roll your eyes at me.
选美教练这事 你觉得我疯了
All the pageant stuff. You-- You think I'm ridiculous.
不是 我是觉得你成长了
No, I don't. I think you're evolved.
真的很难让一个男性
You know, it takes a really secure man
放下自我而让女性发光发亮
to put his ego aside and let a woman shine.
我遇到你的那一刻 你就是这么做的
And you've been doing that for me since the moment I met you.
你让我觉得自己 独一无二
It's what made me finally feel... special.
我以为你也找到了能让你有这感觉的人
And I guess you found someone that made you feel that way.
就在我们结婚的那一刻
Just happened to be when we were married.
也许一个人并不能给你所有你想要的
Maybe one person can't give you everything that you need.
你做到了
You do.
你看到了真实的我
You do see me.
说实话 我从没有像现在这样爱你
And honestly, I've never been more in love with you than I am right now.
好消息不断
The news was all good.
我父亲的心事全部清除
Any blockages to my father's heart had been removed,
我和科拉莉之间的隔阂也清了
and so had any obstacles between me and Coralee.
开房♥去
Get a room.
看来你采纳了我的建议
I see you took my advice.
谢谢
Thanks for that.
老式说我真没想到你能做到
Honestly I'm surprised you were able to pull it off.
科拉莉 我原以为你想找个
Coralee, I thought you'd actually want a guy who was,
更像男人的男人
you know, more like... a guy.
爸 你绝对是史无前例唯一一个
Dad, you must be the only man in history
与死神擦肩而过后变成更混♥蛋♥的人
to have a brush with mortality and become an even bigger asshole.
-好了 鲍勃 别说了 -不
- Okay, Bob. It's okay. - No, no, no.
我还真以为我俩和好了
I thought we finally had a breakthrough.
不过就是一次温馨时刻
Just because we had one touchy-feely moment,
并不代表我就像你这么软蛋
doesn't mean I went soft like you.
真不敢相信你居然在背后诽谤我
I can't believe you hired Bob "Backbiter" Barnard behind my back!
举手之劳
It was just business.
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