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但没关系 斯黛拉跟我很铁 会原谅我的
but it's cool, so Rose and I are tight, she'll give me a pass.
你干什么呢
What are you doing?
鲍勃说我要把这些搬走
Oh, Bob said I have to move these.
我来帮你吧
Well, here, let me help ya.
这样你就能看彩排了 你是为了这个来的吧
And then, you can watch rehearsal. That's why you came, right?
你为什么对我这么好
Why are you being so nice to me?
我们就这样
This is what we do.
女王总是帮另一个女王整理皇冠
A queen always helps another queen fix her crown.
走吧
C'mon.
做最后三拍
Just show me the last three beats.
快点 重要的时候 展示自己
Come on, this is the big time. Sparkle!
-都做完了 -现在 怎么做到的
- All done. - Already? How?
有人帮了我
I had a little help.
这就是选美的意义吧 姐妹情
That's what pageants are about, right? Sisterhood?
我没让你这么干
That is not how I told you to do it.
回去再按正确的方法做一遍
Go back and do it the right way.
别这样 鲍勃 别这么严厉
Oh, come on Bob. Don't be such a hard ass,
应该是充满乐趣才对
this is supposed to be fun.
好警♥察♥
Good cop!
当坏警♥察♥是一回事
Being bad cop was one thing,
但斯黛拉·罗斯让我
but Stella Rose making me
看起来很无能完全是另一回事
look incompetent was another thing altogether.
好 你是来参加选美的
Fine. You came here for a pageant,
我们先把你弄上舞台
let's get you on stage.
手抓牢了
Hold it still.
开幕式上他们会把灯打在马儿身上
They've gotta light the horse for the opening ceremonies.
我会摔下来的 没有马鞍
I'm going to fall off. There's no saddle!
所以才叫无鞍牛仔
That's why it's called Bareback Buckaroo.
不是这样的
No, it's not.
他知道你害怕 亲爱的 别紧张
He can sense your fear, darling. Relax.
两腿夹紧了 屁♥股♥往前挤
Squeeze your thighs together and thrust your hips forward.
天啊 天啊
Oh, God. Oh, God!
妈的
Oh, shit.
-我们能走了吗 -还不行
- Can we leave? - No.
不会吧 你让她清理 太恶心了
Seriously? You're gonna make her clean it? That's disgusting!
动手吧 不扫不行
Go on. It's not gonna wipe itself.
扫马粪跟选美有关系吗
What does poop have to do with pageants?
-是啊 -你少管闲事
- Yeah. - Mind your own business.
你一步步来 按我说的做
You follow directions. Do as I say.
不是那样 淑女从不下跪
Not like that. A lady never gets down on her knees.
你闭嘴
Don't!
我在我家厨房♥是这么干的
I do this on my kitchen floors,
我敢说不带墨镜你不敢看
and I defy you to look at them without sunglasses.
-谁在你厨房♥里拉大便 -喂
- Who's pooping in your kitchen? - Hey.
我马上回来
I'll be back in a little while.
斯黛拉 盯着她
Stella, keep an eye on her.
什么味儿怪怪的 不是马粪
Something didn't smell right, and it wasn't the horse shit.
我得知道 如果斯黛拉不是来帮忙的
I had to know. If Stella Rose wasn't helping,
那她想干什么
what was she up to?
我的天啊
Oh, holy God.
我进去洗了15分钟澡
I'm in the shower for 15 minutes,
你们就把我的草坪变成水乐园了
and you turn my front lawn into a water park?
别这样 科拉莉
Come on, Coralee.
你总是这么紧张肯定会出问题的
You keep clenching that tight, you're gonna pull something.
我叫了维修工
Okay, I called the mechanic
周末维修上门要等三倍时间
and it's triple time to do house calls on the weekend,
所以要到周一了
so we have to wait till Monday.
太好了 那我们就能多点时间一起了
Great! We can spend more time together.
一起干么 玩泥巴
Doing what? Baby pool mud wrestling?
走吧 上次我答应你不来就不来 来就好好玩
Let's go. Last time I promised you double or nothing.
不 上次我离开拖车公园是有原因的
No! There is a reason I left that trailer park.
因为你总是觉得自己比我们好
Because you think you're better than us, you always have.
别人可能信熟♥女♥那一套 但我不信
Everybody else might believe that swanky MILF act, but not me.
-好吧 你好了吗 -科拉莉 你好
- Alright. Are you done? - Hey, Coralee!
靠
Oh, shit.
看看谁来了
What have we here?
闭上你的臭嘴 布兰迪·琳恩
Shut your pie hole, Brandi Lynne.
你好 鲍勃
Bob, hi!
你来这干吗
What are you doing here?
埃特·梅知道你感冒了很难过
Well, Etta Mae felt awful about you coming down with a cold
只能不来参加你的晚宴了
and having to cancel your dinner.
所以她让我来
So she asked me to drop off
给你送些她的拿手好派
some of her world-famous shepherd's pie.
你俩真是太好了
That is just so thoughtful of both y'all.
-这是谁 -慈善对象
- And, uh, who might this be? - Uh... A charity case.
我们从拖车公园收养了一家子
We adopted a family from the trailer park,
他们本应该下周末来
and they were supposed to come next weekend.
但她脑子可能被毒品烧坏了
But her brain is so fried from all the meth
她记错了日期
that she got the dates wrong.
-她胡说 我是她的 -她还中风了
- She's lying. I'm her-- - She also had a stroke,
所以她基本是在胡说
so most of what she says doesn't make any sense at all.
现在她的拖车出故障了
And now her trailer is on the fritz.
所以她和她的毒品婴儿们
So it looks like she and her crack babies
会跟我们待一阵子
are gonna be with us for a while.
-鲍勃搞不定吗 -他不在
- Well, Bob can't fix it? - He's outta town.
鲍勃唯一一次爬到车底下
The only time Bob's been under a car
是他在躲避灰熊那回
is when he was hiding from a grizzly.
你要不要来罐啤酒
You want a beer?
-别听她的 -听着
- Oh, bless her heart. - Well, listen...
她发疯了
She's crazy.
我懂点儿发动机 我还欠你一次呢
I know a little about engines, and I do owe you a favor.
我很乐意帮你看看
I'm happy to take a look.
如果你不介意我打开引擎盖看看的话
That is if you don't mind me peeking under your hood?
开吧
Peek away.
她没有引擎盖
You know, she doesn't have a hood.
-好吧 我可以的 -可以是可以
- That's alright, I'm happy to. - It's okay, you know...
好吧
Oh, all right.
斯黛拉·罗斯 我们要去泡个温泉
Hey, Stella Rose, we're about to head to the spa, so...
到点了吗
Is it that time already?
天啊 你已经做很久了
My goodness, you've been at that a long time.
为什么不歇一歇
Why don't you take a break?
跟我们一起去吧
Come with us.
选美组委承担所有人的疗养费用
The pageant's paying for all the girls to get treatments.
来吧 很好玩的
Yeah, c'mon, it'll be fun!
我得先做完 鲍勃要我学会一步一步来
I need to finish. Bob says I need to learn to follow directions.
鲍勃才要学会放一放
Bob needs to learn to back off.
要是他不小心点
If he's not careful,
选美还没开始 你就会被他毁了
he's gonna ruin this for you before it even starts.
他只是为我♥操♥心
He's just looking out for me.
鲍勃只为他自己操心
Bob only looks out for himself.
他是个完完全全的自恋狂
He's a complete and total narcissist.
-相信我 -鲍勃在这儿是个传奇
- Trust me. I know. - Bob's a legend around here,
但是名声不太好
and not in a good way.
斯黛拉·罗斯已经都告诉我们了
Stella Rose told us the whole story.
没错
Oh, yeah.
我罩着他
I took him under my wing,
教会他每一件事 然后
taught him everything he knows. And then,
当他有更好的交易时
when he thought he had a better deal,
就把我给踹了
he dropped me like a corn dog without a stick.
记住我说的 他也会这么对你的
Mark my words, he will do the same to you.
他说他对我有信心
He says he believes in me.
他当然会这么说
Oh, sure he does!
要是你还没瘦下来之前碰到他
Do you think he'd be this
你觉得他会对你投入这么多吗
invested in you if he'd met you when you were fat?
他是个投机分子
He's an opportunist.
他专挑软柿子捏 利用他们 相信我
He found someone vulnerable and took advantage. Trust me.
他根本不在乎你
He doesn't care about you,
但我在乎你
but I do.
我们女孩之间要相互照顾 对吗
Us girls gotta look out for each other, right?
擦干眼泪跟我们去做水疗
Dry your tears and you come on to the spa.
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