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我知道瘦有魔力
I knew skinny was magic,
但现在 我的胸罩都不合适了
but now, none of my bras fit.
新帕蒂更强了
The new Patty was more powerful,
但是咪♥咪♥更小了
but with much smaller boobs.
鲍勃说没有比聚拢型胸罩更能提升自信的了
Bob says nothing says confidence like a good push-up bra.
你觉得这个怎么样
What do you think about this one?
这个呢
This one?
我不知道 我想看看戴上的样子
I don't know. I feel like I'd have to see it on.
我只是想在这周末展现出最好的一面
I just wanna look my best this weekend.
我还是不明白 如果你根本不去参赛
I still don't understand why Bob's taking you all the way
鲍勃为什么要带你去阿♥拉♥巴马的选美
to a pageant in Alabama if you're not even competing.
因为他要让我看看真正的选美女孩是怎么样的
'Cause, he's gonna show me how real pageant girls act.
她们怎么走路 说话 微笑
How they walk, how they talk, how they smile.
他的教练指导是那里的导演
His coaching mentor is the director,
所以她会让我们走贵宾通道
so she's giving us VIP access.
你是真的喜欢参加选美
Are you really into all this beauty pageant stuff,
还是喜欢鲍勃
or are you just into Bob?
都
Both.
这周我能跟他一起远离他的妻子了
And now that I'm getting him away from his wife for the weekend,
我要让他知道我才是他的灵魂伴侣
I'm gonna show him that I am his soul mate too.
我们是完美的搭档
We're perfect partners.
我们会赢下魔力耶稣小姐
We're gonna win Miss Magic Jesus,
地区选美小姐 美国小姐 我就会出名了
and Regionals, and Miss American Lady, and then I'll be famous,
所有人都吃屁去吧
and everyone else can S a big fat D.
豹纹
Oh, leopard!
-你觉得他会喜欢这个吗 -等等
- Do you think he'll like this one? - Hold up.
你觉得这一趟会发生什么
What do you think is going to happen on this trip?
这周末绝对会超超超有意思
This weekend is going to be fun, fun, fun.
这周末绝对会是工作工作工作
This weekend is gonna be work, work, work.
为什么去见你的选美教练指导
Why is seeing your pageant coaching mentor
突然间这么重要
suddenly such a goddamned emergency?
魔力耶稣小姐还有几星期就要决赛了
Miss Magic Jesus is in just a couple of weeks,
我需要更多帮助
and I need the extra help.
我也是
Well, so do I!
我今晚有晚宴
My dinner party is tonight,
女青年会的女士们要带丈夫们来
and all the Junior League ladies are bringing their husbands,
你就这么丢下我 像是已经离婚了似的
and you're leaving me alone like some divorce.
我们不是搭档吗
I thought we were partners.
没错
We are.
我做饭 打扫 帮工 一切都很完美
I cooked, I cleaned, I tszujed, everything looks great!
你知道什么不完美吗
You know what doesn't look great?
你带着一名未成年少女去别的州
You, taking a minor across state lines.
看起来很像是绑♥架♥
That looks a lot like kidnapping.
别小题大做的
Don't be dramatic.
是你自己一副生死攸关的样子
Well, you're the one acting like it's life or death.
因为就是
Because it is!
-为什么 -因为帕蒂失控了
- Why? - Because Patty is out of control!
什么意思
What do you mean?
她差点把一个人点燃了
She nearly lit a man on fire.
她只是...
She's just...
有点任性 冲动
a little willful, impulsive.
浮躁
Impetuous.
鲍勃 她是个青少年
Bob, she's a teenage girl,
他们都很疯狂 你明白的
they're all insane and you know this.
不 帕蒂不一样
No, Patty is different!
-怎么不一样 -因为她是我唯一的选美客户
- How? - Because she is my only coaching client.
你知道那对我来说是最重要的
And you know that is the most important thing in my life.
除你之外
Other than you.
帕蒂让我回忆起了当初第一次见你时的样子
Patty actually reminds me a lot of you when I first met you.
说话小心点
Bite your tongue.
她也有你那种火焰
She has the same kind of fire.
如果我能好好培养
And if I could just harness it,
我觉得她能带我们拿到美国小姐
I think she could take us both all the way to Miss American Lady.
我只是需要控制好她
I just have to get her under control.
斯黛拉·罗斯 我的一切都是她教我的
Stella Rose, she taught me everything I know.
她会知道该怎么办
She will know what to do.
让你放弃教练就这么难受吗
Would it really be so bad for you to have to give up coaching?
你进不了女青年会
Oh, would it really be so bad
就这么难受吗
if you didn't get into the Junior League?
帕蒂 你来干什么 我说了我来接你
Patty. What are you doing here? I said I was gonna pick you up.
我来早了 所以我想我来吧
Well, I was running early, so I figured I'd save you the trip.
-看 任性 -我能看出是紧急情况了
- See what I mean? Willful. - I can see the emergency.
去车道上等我 我把车开出来
Meet me in the driveway, I'll pull the car around.
没关系 我从车♥库♥上车
It's okay, I'll go in from the garage.
-帕蒂 拜托 -抱歉
- Patty, please. - I'm sorry.
科拉莉错了 这的确是紧急情况
Coralee was wrong. This was an emergency.
如果斯黛拉·罗斯没法帮助我控制帕蒂的火焰
If Stella Rose couldn't help me control Patty's fire,
她会把我们俩都燃烧殆尽
she could burn us both to the ground.
要薯片吗
Potato chip?
不用了 我一开始吃就停不下来
No, thanks. Once I start on those, I can't stop.
这些东西是什么东西
What the hell is all this crap?
零食 路上的卡路里不算卡路里
Snacks. Road trip calories don't count.
什么 当然算了
What? Of course they do!
能不能赶紧扔掉
Will you put that away?
你不是很高兴
You're in a mood.
是因为科拉莉吗
Is it Coralee?
我每次来 她都很紧张
Every time I come around, she gets tense.
你不要介意 我觉得
I wouldn't take it personally. I think...
你让她想起了她在你这个年纪的时候
you just remind her a lot of herself when she was that age.
但你为什么想改变我
But why are you trying to change me?
你不喜欢我现在的样子吗
Don't you like me the way I am?
我爱你
I love you.
你美丽 性感 精致
You are beautiful, and fierce, sophisticated.
我只是希望你也能向外界展示出来
I just want you to wear all that on the outside too.
我让你想起了你的妻子吗
Do I remind you of your wife?
其实你更多是让我想起了我自己
Actually, you remind me more of myself.
看 灵魂伴侣
See? Soul mates.
我...我为这一路准备了个歌♥单
I um... I made us a playlist for the road.
*是你 是你*
*You are, you are*
*是你 是你*
*You are, you are*
*是你*
*You are*
本来我挺喜欢古典乐
You know, usually I'm partial to the classics.
布里特妮 克里斯蒂安 但我喜欢这首
Britney. Christina. But I do like this.
*说你和我的感觉一样*
*Just say you feel the way that I feel*
*我感受到了性吸引*
*I'm feeling sexual*
*所以我们应该做♥爱♥*
*So we should be sexual*
我终于来到一个真的选美盛会
I was finally at a real pageant.
没人在身边
And with no one else around,
我就能拥有鲍勃全部的注意力
I would have Bob's full attention.
我看起来怎么样 我的头发怎么样
How do I look? How's my hair?
你看起来很好
You look great.
你还好吗 你看起来很焦虑
Are you okay? You seem nervous.
焦虑 不 我...
Nervous? No. I, uh...
我只是有快20年没见过斯黛拉·罗斯了
I just haven't seen Stella Rose in almost 20 years
她有点严厉
and she is a bit of a harsh critic.
她比我还直接
She's even more direct than I am.
不可能
I didn't think that was possible.
相信我 她就是个传奇
Oh, trust me, she's a legend.
在她开始做导演之前 她训练出了三个美国小姐
Before she started directing, she coached three Miss USAs,
一位美国女士 天啊 她来了
one Miss American Lady-- Oh, my God, she's here.
看看这是谁来了
Look what the horse drug in.
你看起来像是被猫抓过
You look like something the cat dragged in.
对不起 我的发型师用了太多发胶了
I'm sorry. My stylist used too much product.
-没人在乎你伤感的故事 -好了 好了
- Nobody cares about your sob story. - Hey, hey.
没那么糟
Oh, it's not that bad.
看 不 你只需要一点...
Look, no. You just need a little...
还有...
And...
好了
there.
别哭了
No more tears.
厉害 你女儿来参加选美吗
Impressive. You got a daughter in the pageant?
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