同妻俱乐部（2015）

Grace and Frankie S05E05

Part 3 Sept. 16, 2020, 12:11 p.m.

你不得不花心思追求那个
You had to woo a man
穿着用轮胎做的凉鞋的男人
that wears sandals made out of truck tires?
随你怎么嘲讽吧
Oh, scoff all you want.
他当初可是音乐节上的9分先生
He was a Woodstock nine.
要是换双凉鞋也许有9.5分
Maybe a nine-and-a-half without the sandals.
好吧我上钩
Okay, I'll bite.
你怎么疯狂追求索尔的
How did you woo Sol?
我爬进他的窗户
I climbed through his window,
在他的公♥寓♥地板上铺满鲜花
covered his apartment floor with flowers.
再说一遍膝盖不行
Again, the knee issue.
我摆上广♥告♥牌写着「索尔来占有我吧」
I placed a classified ad that said, "Hey, Sol, come and get me."
这可帮不上我的忙
This isn't helping.
也没帮上索尔的忙我忘写我的名字和电♥话♥了
It didn't help Sol, either. I forgot to put my name and number.
说真的弗兰琦我该怎么做
Seriously, Frankie, what am I gonna do?
我不知道但无论如何
I don't know, but whatever it is,
你得勇敢去尝试
you have to put yourself out there.
可能甚至要牺牲一点自尊
You might even have to sacrifice your dignity a little.
但如果能把他争取回来不就都值了吗
But isn't it worth it if you could get him back?
你好感谢等待我是达伦
Hello, thanks for holding, this is Darren.
你好达伦总算来了
Yes, hello, Darren. It's about time.
你不认识我但我是你的噩梦
You don't know me, but I'm your worst nightmare.
我刚跟市政厅抗争把绿灯通行时间延长了三秒
I just fought City Hall and got three seconds added to a crosswalk,
而且我再用袜子布偶演一出独幕戏
and I'm just one sock puppet soliloquy away
就能让我孙女第一次笑出来了
from getting my granddaughter to laugh for the first time.
非常抱歉还得让您等一会
So sorry, I'm going to have to put you on hold again.
不达伦
No, Darren.
达伦别这样对我
Darren, don't do me like this.
别这样对我
Don't do me like this!
谁把你生得这么可爱
Who gave you that little goodie?
谁会忍♥心抛弃这个小可爱
Who could abandon a face like that?
别提抛弃这件事了它有心理阴影
Let's not bring up abandonment. It's an issue for him.
我本来对养一只流浪获救犬有点担心
You know, I was a little worried about getting a rescue,
但卡尔太可爱了
but Carl's so loving.
你选了只好的
You picked a good one.
倒不如说是它选中了我
I'd say it's more like he picked me.
那它也眼光不错
Then he picked a good one, too.
是奥利弗
Oh, that's Oliver.
皮特求我指导他
Peter begged me to coach him.
没想到吧
Surprise, surprise!
三十岁的大老爷们还演不出堂吉诃德的威严
A 30-year-old doesn't quite have the gravitas to play Don Quixote.
-你不是奥利弗 -对我是巴德
- You're not Oliver. - Nope, I'm Bud.
-当然了 -你们终于选了只狗
- Of course you are. - Hey, you finally picked a dog!
没错这是卡尔
Yep, this is Carl.
什么品种杰克罗素犬吗
What is he, a Jack Russell?
不
No.
不不不是只混种狗
No, no, no, no. He's a mutt.
为什么叫它卡尔
Why'd you name him Carl?
因为它最初是在卡尔星快餐厅被发现的
Oh, because he was found at a Carl's Jr.
我有次也在卡尔星快餐厅被发现
I was found in a Carl's Jr. Once.
索尔逼我回家吃胡萝卜
Sol made me come home and eat carrots.
你确定这家伙是混种吗
You sure this guy's a mutt?
没DNA测试谁说得准呢
Who can say without a full DNA panel?
但它是只在垃圾箱被营救的狗狗
But he's a rescue dog who was found in a dumpster,
所以绝对无从考证了
so, we absolutely will never know for sure.
你来这干什么呢
What are you doing here anyway?
你叫我过来取走你们旧的食物处理机
Uh, you asked me to stop by to pick up your old food processor.
没错给宝宝用
Right, for the baby food.
卡尔已经比我们养的任何流浪获救犬都乖了
Carl's already better behaved than any rescues we ever had.
莫哈特玛把我毛衣袖子咬下来了
Mahatma ate the sleeves off all my sweaters.
现在谁在咬你的毛衣袖子呢
And who's eating all your sleeves now?
穿运动裤的老头也好意思嘲讽我衣衫不整
Hilarious from a guy in sweatpants.
你从哪个救助所领养到它的
Which shelter did you get him from?
就是领养杰瑞·加西亚的那个
You know, the one we got Jerry Garcia from.
杰瑞不是在草莓节上被我们发现然后领养的吗
I thought we found Jerr-Bear at the Strawberry Festival.
我们为何站在这讨论什么草莓节
Why are we standing around here talking about strawberry festivals?
我以为你是来取食物处理机的呢
I thought you came over to get a food processor.
-是啊 -好极了
- I did. - Great.
那就快帮我找到该死的食物处理机
So help me find the fucking food processor.
-不是那个 -好吧
- That's not it. - Okay.
你好尼克
Hello, Nick.
当人们分手时
You know, when people break up,
通常就会减少见面次数保持距离
they usually see less of each other.
得了吧我还经常和前任见面罗伯特还有...
Oh, please, I still see my exes. Robert and...
-好像只有他 -你怎么知道我在这
- I guess that's it. - How did you even know I'd be here?
你怎么知道我会来
Well, how did you even know I'd be here?
我糊涂了我们这是在干什么
Okay, I'm confused. What are we doing?
我的午餐同伴可是马上要回来了
'Cause my lunch date's gonna be back in a minute and...
这不是我的职责了
this isn't my job anymore.
我只想说你是对的
I just wanna say that you were right.
是我把你推开了
I did push you away,
但尼克我已经变了
but, Nick, I've changed.
-你嘴上这么说 -不我是认真的
- You say that, b-- - No, I mean it.
我才更适合你
And I'm better for you than
而不是跟你共进午餐的
whatever age-inappropriate sorority girl
过于年轻的女大学生
you're having lunch with.
好极了她来了
Great, 'cause here she is.
你真的只喜欢两种类型的是吧
You really only have two types, don't you?
格蕾丝这位是凯思琳
Grace, this is Cathleen.
-我母亲 -不是吧
- My mother. - No.
想一起吃甜点吗
So, are you joining us for dessert?
我说不好妈
Oh, I don't know, Mom.
格蕾丝你想一起吗
Grace, would you be comfortable with that?
当然没问题哒
Abso-tootin-lutely.
我♥操♥
Jesus fuck.
等等等等
Wait! Wait! Wait!
我也许知道你为什么生气
I think I might know why you're mad,
但我能说些什么好说服你
but is there anything I can say that'd convince you
不要再打我吗
not to hit me again?
不能
No.
你的脸拧成一团我下不去手
All right, I can't do it with your face all scrunched up like that.
你想让我转个身
Want me to turn around or--
不不别给我制♥造♥条件
No! No! Just stop helping me.
我下不去手你太可悲了
I can't do it. You're too sad.
我能问问你多大了吗
Can I ask you... how old you are?
什么我17了怎么了
What? I'm 17. Why?
我想弄清你是不是
I'm trying to figure out if you could be
我认为你可能是的那个人
who I think you might possibly be.
我是被你破坏家庭的那个人
I'm the guy whose family you broke up.
我爸爸看了你发给我妈妈的那些邮件
My dad read the emails you sent my mom.
什么邮件
What emails?
你跟我妈妈偷♥情♥ 却不记得她
You had an affair with my mom and you don't remember?
如果是17年前我记不太清了
If it was 17 years ago, I don't remember much.
不是两年前
No, it was two years ago.
谢天谢地
Oh, thank God.
谢天谢地
Oh, thank God.
如果是两年前的邮件那就不是我发的
If those emails are from two years ago, they're not from me.
你得另找人打
You need to hit someone else.
不我知道我妈妈来这见过你
No, I know my mom came here to see you.
她告诉我们她要去纽约看《长靴妖姬》
She told us she'd go to New York to see Kinky Boots,
但她来这见你了
but she came here for you.
等等你妈妈是叫克丽丝托吗
Wait, is your mom's name Krystle?
所以你确实记得她
So you do remember her?
是的
Yeah.
但不是你想的那样
But it's not what you think.
她是我妈妈
She's my mom.
-什么 -我的生母
- What? - My birth mom.
也是你妈妈
And your mom.
她是我们的妈妈
She's both... our moms.
但她先当的我妈
But she was my mom first.
然后她把我送去给别人领养了
And then she gave me up for adoption.