飞出个未来（1999）
Futurama
第二季
剧集 | 飞出个未来（1999） | 导航列表
飞出个未来（1999）
Futurama S02E09
Part 3
Feb. 14, 2026, 6:10 p.m.
漱口水 背蜡 还有抗渍内♥裤♥
mouthwash, a back wax, and stain-proof underwear.
怼得好 妹子！
you go, girl!
顺便说一句 你的朋友 Fry 他掉进地牢里了
by the way, your pal Fry fell into the dungeon.
给他拿个玉米卷 这样他就不会死在里头 弄脏我的地盘
take him a taco so he doesn't die and stink up the place.
算了 Al
come on, Al.
你能不能放这个小家伙出来呢？
can't you let the little guy out?
我的天 Leela 你还想一天来两次？
geez, Leela, twice in one day?
我可不是超人
i'm not superman.
你为什么要擅闯我族人的禁谷呢？
why were you sneaking into my people's forbidden valley?
因为我觉得Alcazar对你有所隐瞒
'cause i think Alcazar's hiding something from you.
听着 Leela 你可能觉得我说的话很难听
listen, Leela, you may not like it.
你可能不会信或者连听都不想听
you may not believe it. you may not want to hear it.
但是Alcazar是个混♥蛋♥ 他对你很差劲 他...
but Alcazar's a jerk. he's bad for you. he--
我知道
i know.
你知道？
you do?
Fry 如果连你这种智障都能看出来
Fry, if it's obvious to you with your learning disability
我肯定早就看出来了啊
then, of course, it's obvious to me.
他粗鲁、霸道 使唤我就像使唤奴隶一样
he's crude and gross, and he treats me like a slave.
那就甩了这个独眼混♥蛋♥
then dump his one-eyed ass.
我做不到
i can't.
如果我离开了Alcazar
if i leave Alcazar
那独眼族就真的没有未来了
that's the end of the cyclops race
我不会让这种事发生的
and i won't let that happen
即便这会让我一生不幸
even if it means a lifetime of unhappiness.
Leela 过来擦下二号♥走廊！
Leela, mop up in aisle number two.
吃晚饭的时候我就跟他分手
i'll break up with him at dinner.
那我拭目以待
i'll be there.
哟 Leela 你做的什么？
yo, Leela, what gives?
猪说你的泔水吃起来像垃圾
pig says your slop tastes like crap.
对没错 像垃圾
yeah, like crap.
赶紧的 Leela.
come on, Leela.
你值得更好的男人
you deserve better than this guy.
快点甩了他吧
dump him already.
我在想办法
i'm trying.
嘿 大家都先别吃了
hey, everyone, jam a sock in your spit faucets.
不久之前 我还在孤独的夜里
not long ago, i spent my lonely nights
和鼠人还有他女朋友一起看租来的影碟
renting slasher flicks with rat man and his girlfriend.
但这位美丽的姑娘来到了这里...
but then a beautiful woman arrived...
我说别吃了 猪！
stop eating, pig!
她给我以及我们曾经辉煌的文明带来了希望
and she brought new hope for me and our once-great civilization.
现在 独眼族未来千万年的命运
now, a million centuries of cyclops destiny
都取决于这一个问题的回答
depend on the answer to one question.
Leela 你愿意嫁给我吗
Leela, will you marry me?
别 不要啊
no. no.
嗯 我愿意！
yes, i will!
他们要结婚了
they'regetting married.
恭喜你啊 Leela
congratulations, Leela.
你能来我真的很高兴
glad you could make it.
真是不可思议的一天！
it's a magical day.
欢迎！
welcome!
婚礼预庆祝活动
嘿！Leela!
psst! Leela!
你得把我从这里弄出去
you've got to get me out of here.
太恐怖 我只能吃剩饭
it's horrible-- eating scraps
随地大小便
letting my waste drop wherever it falls
就跟被关在动物园里的动物似的
like an animal in a zoo.
动物都在角落大小便的
animals go in the corner.
还可以拉在角落?
the corner.
我怎么没想到？
why didn't i think of that?
听着 Fry 我很想帮你
look, Fry, i'd like to help you
但今天是我的婚礼 我也有点忙
but it's my wedding, and i'm kind of busy.
给你 尽力为我高兴吧
here. try to be happy for me.
这样 至少我们当中还有一个人是开心的
that way, at least one of us will be.
就是它了
that's it.
小鸟放风的时间到了
it's time for this bird to walk.
Bender！快来 我们得去收集Alcazar的罪证
Bender! come on, we've got to get some dirt on Alcazar.
我们去查清禁谷到底在禁什么
let's go find out what makes the forbidden valley so forbidden.
不了谢谢 我在这就整挺好
eh, no thanks. i'm good.
可是你在那或许能偷到很酷的禁品呢
but there's probably some cool forbidden stuff you can steal.
我不知道 Fry
i don't know, Fry.
在我一生当中 我头一回觉得
for the first time in my life, i feel like...
自己偷的东西足够多了
i've stolen enough.
Bender 振作起来
Bender, snap out of it.
对不起 我不知道刚才那是怎么了
sorry. i don't know what came over me.
咱们走吧
let's go!
♪我爱盗窃♪
♪i love stealin'♪
♪我爱小偷小摸♪
♪i love takin' things♪
那头猪跟我穿了同一款凉鞋
that pig over there is wearing the same sandals as me.
加油 伙计 跳过去！
come on, boy, jump!
好样的
good boy.
哇哦
whoa, mittens.
额滴神啊
my god!
四座一模一样的城♥堡♥
four identical castles.
一个更比一个像！
each more identical than the last.
这就奇怪了
that's weird.
这是另一个雕像
it's another cyclops.
但是这个人有五只眼睛
only this one has five eyes.
然后这还有一个没眼睛的
and here's another one with noeyes.
是否有人提出任何合理的异议？
does anyone have a reason why this couple
反对这双夫妇带有神圣不可逆枷锁的结合
shall not be joined in the irrevocable shackles of holy bliss?
拯救独眼一族这种神圣的使命
saving a race of one-eyed monsters?
又有谁会反对呢？
who could object to that?
直奔主题吧 牧师
cut to the chase, preach.
Alcazar你愿意与这女士无论贫穷疾病,一生相爱至死不渝?
do you, Alcazar, take this woman...poorer, in sickness, to love, death, part?
是的 我当然愿意 快 再快点！
yeah, sure, i do. come on-- faster!
Leela你是否愿意复♥制♥粘贴这男士的誓言，至死不渝？
do you, Leela, copy and paste his response till death do you part?
我..愿
i... d--
哦 我的天
oh, my god.
什么鬼？
what the...?
嘿 Alcazar
hey, Alcazar,
你忘记邀请一个人了
you left somebody off the guest list.
Alcazar!
我们的婚礼你怎么迟到了这么久呢？
why you are so late for our wedding?
还有你怎么只有一只眼睛？
and why you have only one eye?
这个...
it's...
额 嘿 宝贝
uh, hey, sweetie.
你先回到城♥堡♥那边等我吧
just go back to the castle and wait for me.
她...她疯了
she... she's nuts.
我可以变成五眼族
i can morph into a five-eyed alien
然后我大概可能说过要娶她
and i kind ofsaid i'd marry her.
但是我真的是独眼族人
but i'm really a cyclops
我也是真心想要娶你的
and i'm really going to marry you.
哦 是吗？那这个又是怎么回事？
oh, yeah? then what about this?
额...
uh...
额...这个稍微有点尴尬
uh... this is a bit awkward.
她是谁？
who's a-she?
她是谁？
who's she?
她们是谁？
who are they?
回城♥堡♥去 Sandy
go back to the castle, Sandy.
还有 你可能也想见她
and maybe you'd like to meet her
还有她
and her.
额..额
uh, eh, uh...
这 额...
this, um...
Leela...
你肯定有点乱套了吧
this must all be very confusing.
一点点
a little.
这就是为什么我决定要揍你
that's why i've decided to hurt you
揍到你能解释一切为止
until you explain it.
让我们看看你的本来面目
show us your realform.
对！
yeah!
动手吧！
do it!
好吧 这就是我的真实面目 但我可以解释的
飞出个未来（1999）
Futurama
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