飞出个未来（1999）

Futurama S02E18

Part 2 Feb. 14, 2026, 6:10 p.m.

stop being a big hallucinating baby.
是吗？
yeah?
会傻傻乱想的人会这样做吗？
well, could a big Hallucinating baby do this?
我害怕
i'm scared.
我不知道我更喜欢哪个
i don't know which i like more
是把人脸打烂还是把车砸烂
smashing cars or smashing faces.
好在今晚你不用做决定
well, lucky you don't got to decide tonight.
走吧我们明天还要去教堂
now, come on, we got church tomorrow.
你听到了吗？
did you hear something?
可能是只金丝猴吧
nah, it was probably just a golden marmoset.
这可不像我听到过的金丝猴的声音
that don't sound like no golden marmoset i ever heard.
好了
made it.
那么你明天穿什么？
so, anyway, uh, what are you wearing tomorrow?
136号♥拘留所
地球上最快乐的地方
什么鬼…
what the...?
传输液？
transmission fluid?
我去了什么地方？
where have i been?
发生了什么？
what happened?
滚出去你这个恶心的流浪汉
gets out of here, youse lousy bum.
拜托我害怕
please, i'm scared.
我们都害怕
we're all scared.
这就是人类的现状
it's the human condition.
你认为我为什么要假装成硬汉？
why do you thinks i put on this tough-guy facade?
现在快滚
now, beat it!
我昨晚晕过去了
i passed out around midnight
比平常早了很多
which is much earlier than usual
我醒来后
and when i woke up
在我的胸腔里发现了这些东西
i found these in my chest cabinet.
放轻松兄弟
aw, relax, buddy.
你可能只是撞了一大堆毛茸茸的垃圾而已
you were probably just shooting some big, fuzzy craps.
不是我觉得我可能撞了人
no!
我觉得我可能撞了人
i think i may have hurt someone.
天呐我快要崩溃了
oh, lord, i'm on the verge of a nervous meltdown.
Bender 你吓到我了
geez, Bender, you're scaring me.
你要疯了
you're going wacko.
是的
you're right.
我需要专业的帮助
i need professional help
不管要花多少钱
and damn the expense.
电子占卜
管他花多少钱
damn the expense!
朋友你什么都不用担心
my friend, you have nothing to worry about...
除了噩梦般的生活和无休止的恐怖
except a nightmarish life of unremitting horror.
因为你是一辆“狼车”
for, you see, you are a were-car.
一辆“狼车”
a were-car?
撞到你的也是一辆“狼车”
the car that ran you down on the moors was also a were-car.
它通过邪恶的车前灯把病毒传播给了你
it beamed the virus to you through its demonic headlights.
这真是太疯狂了
that's crazy.
没错疯狂到它就是真的
yes. so crazy that it must be true.
每个午夜当你的系统时钟被重置的时候
each midnight, when your clock resets to zero
你的硬件会被重新设定为一辆有谋杀倾向的四轮汽车
your hardware reconfigures into a murderous four-wheeled car.
我不能一直撞人啊
i can't keep running people over.
我还没有那么大的名气可以逃脱法律的制裁
i'm not famous enough to get away with it.
你不能帮帮我吗？
can't you help me?
当然可以但你必须愿意付出一大笔费用
yes, but you must be willing to pay a terrible price.
好好好
yeah, yeah, yeah.
跟我来
follow me.
根据这个古老的 “读我”文件
according to this ancient "read me" file
你唯一的希望就是摧毁那辆初代“狼车”
your only hope is to destroy the original were-car.
我明白
i'm with you.
在其死亡的阵痛中
in its death throes
这辆可怕的汽车会将病毒的卸载程序传送出去
the dread car will beam out the virus's uninstall program
从而去掉你身上的诅咒
thus, ridding you of the curse.
然后呢我就永远不会死了吗？
and, otherwise, i can never die?
谁说的？你当然会死
who said that? sure you can die.
你想死吗？
you want to die?
不我想活下去
no! i want to live.
我还有太多东西没有拥有
there's still too many things i don't own.
那就继续活下去吧永远被诅咒
then live on, forever cursed.
每晚你的攻击会变得越来越恐怖
each night, your attacks will become more gruesome
直到一个漆黑的深夜
until one dark night
你将注定要杀掉你最好的朋友
you are doomed to kill your dearest friend.
我现在可不想当你最好的朋友
i wouldn't want to be me right now.
走吧
now, go! go!
你们中能不能有人…
uh... could one of you just...
算了
aw, forget it.
我就睡这了
i'll just sleep here.
好了
there!
今晚你没法乱跑了
no rampaging for you tonight.
把除我之外的所有人都焊在墙上不是更有意义吗？
wouldn't it make more sense to weld everyone except me to the wall?
放轻松 Bender
just relax, Bender.
明天我们会把你放下来的吃一顿美美的早饭
tomorrow, we'll pry you down, have a nice breakfast
然后去杀死那个始祖恶魔
and then go hunt down and slaughter that ancient evil.
明天会是很充实的一天
it will be a rich, full day.
好吧晚安
well, good night.
我要去做下个月的晚饭
i'm going to go make my dinners for the next month
然后冷冻起来
and freeze them.
初始化狼车程序
如果你能看懂这个我会碾死你
Bender 不要
Bender, no!
Fry 退后
Fry, stay back!
你这个混♥蛋♥
you jerk!
我以为我是你最好的朋友
i thought i was your best friend.
你这个劈腿的杀人汽车！
what kind of two-timing killmobile are you?
我无法相信
i can't believe this.
Bender要杀他最好的朋友
Bender's supposed to murder his closest friend
我以为那个人是我但他径直冲向了你
which i thought was me, but he went straight for you.
他甚至没有二度尝试撞死我
he didn't even try to second-degree murder me.
你能帮帮我吗？
could you give me some help?
我想Bender压到我的脚了
i think Bender crushed my foot.
别再戳我的痛处了
stop rubbing it in.
天呐
oh, god.
Fry 很高兴再见到你
Fry, i'm so glad to see you.
我没有伤着你吧？
i didn't hurt you, did i?
身体上没有
not physically
你怎么不去问问你的新好朋友Leela呢？
but why don't you ask your new best friend, Leela?
我想压死你？
i tried to run you over?
你真是太贴心了 Bender
it was very sweet of you, Bender.
Fry 这说明不了什么
Fry, it doesn't mean anything.
我有足够的爱给你们俩
i have love enough for two.
谎言全都是甜美的谎言
words, nothing but sweet, sweet words
在我的耳朵里变成了苦涩的橙蜡
that turn into bitter, orange wax in my ears.
你们俩够了
enough with the feelings, you two.
如果我们想治好Bender
if we're going to cure Bender, we've got to go
就必须回到城♥堡♥ 除掉那辆初代狼车
back to the castle and hunt down the original were-car.
是是是是
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
被诅咒了我们知道管他呢
cursed, got it. whatever.
车轮印一直到这里
the tracks lead here.
谢谢你了观察得真仔细
thanks, eagle eye.
现在是白天
now it's daylight.
他应该是机器人形态
so, he should be in robot form...
但是要小心
but be careful.
很多机器人愚蠢又暴♥力♥
many robots are stupid and violent.
我倒是希望自己又蠢又暴♥力♥
i wish i was stupid and violent.
我们走着瞧
then we'd see what's what.
我会把他揍到…哦
i'd pound him till i... oh!
滚回你家去你们这群无知的村民
get ye to your houses, ye ignorant villagers.
嘿
hey!
我们不是没见过世面的村民
we are not ignorant villagers.
我们是世故的新纽约客
we're sophisticated new new yorkers.
揍他
whup his butt!
住手你们在做什么？
stop! what are ye doing?
我们在攻击初代狼车
we're whaling on the original were-car