飞出个未来（1999）
Futurama
第二季
剧集 | 飞出个未来（1999） | 导航列表
飞出个未来（1999）
Futurama S02E05
Part 3
Feb. 14, 2026, 6:10 p.m.
and ever since then
我就被称为正直的Bender
i've been known by the name of honest Bender.
我建议为了大衣存放号♥84干杯
i'd like to propose a toast to... coat check #84.
看反面
turn it over.
噢 Edna
oh. Edna,
在这个星球上所有难闻的、肉感的螃蟹里
of all the slimy, gross crab monsters on this planet
你无疑是最性感的
you are apparently the hottest.
这是我听过的最动人的话了
that's the most beautiful thing i've ever heard.
恕我失陪
yes, well, excuse me.
我要去给我的嘴唇补点妆
i've got to powder my mouth flaps.
额 我也去
uh, me, too.
我都糊涂了 Fry
i'm confused, Fry.
我现在体会到了一种陌生的全新感觉
i'm feeling a strange new emotion.
爱是不是就是出于求偶之外的原因关心异性
is it love when you care about a female for reasons beyond mating?
不 那一定是古怪外星人的情感
nope. must be some weird alien emotion.
Zoidberg说了一些傻话
Zoidberg said some dumb stuff
但他是个不错的男人 真的
but he's a nice guy, really.
那些只不过是Fry教他说的
it's just that Fry's been telling him what to say
Fry是个 你们星球上有白♥痴♥吗
and Fry's a... do you have idiots on your planet?
Fry?
你是说如此美丽的言语都是
you mean, words of such beauty
从那个丑陋外星人的通气孔里出来的
came from the blowhole of that hideous alien?
是啊 怎么了
yeah. what?
听着 别去管那些话
look, never mind the words.
Zoidberg是个医生
Zoidberg's a doctor.
医生 亲爱的
a doctor, honey.
致Fry
我们来聊聊Zoidberg的事
Edna书
进来吧
come in.
你好Fry
hello, Fry.
想吃点牛排龙虾吗
can i interest you in some surf and turf?
不用了 谢谢
no, thanks.
我只是来告诉你Zoidberg真的很棒
i just came to tell you that Zoidberg's really great.
他的“果酱”多得都快从屁♥股♥里出来了
he's got male jelly coming out the wazoo.
本来就是从那里出来的
well, that is where it comes out
不过“果酱”不能代表一切
but jelly isn't everything.
我知道Zoidberg的美妙词句都出自于你
i know Zoidberg's magical words were really yours.
来教我爱你吧
teach me to love you
来自遥远星球的、软乎乎的诗人
注：因为Fry不是甲壳类，所以称他软乎乎
squishy poet from beyond the stars.
我受宠若惊 真的
uh, i'm flattered, really.
如果我想要和可怕的大泥虫做♥爱♥
if i was going to do it with a big, freaky mud bug
肯定优先找你
you'd be way up the list.
安静 你这个浪漫的傻瓜
hush, you romantic fool.
抬起你的下颚 亲我吧
engage your mandibles and kiss me.
Edna?
我再也忍♥不住了 我...
i couldn't stand it any longer. i...
Fry!
Zoidberg医生 不是你看到的那样
Dr. Zoidberg, it's not how it looks.
她的口水都在你的脖子上了
her caviar is on your neck!
但是... 这些都是真的 Zoidberg
but...oh, it's true, Zoidberg.
我们瞒不下去了
we can't hide it any longer.
Fry和我已经坠入爱河了
Fry and i have fallen in love
我们明天就去交♥配♥
and we're going to mate tomorrow.
什么
what?!
Fry 我要向你挑战螯钳决斗
Fry, i challenge you to claw plock.
能说中文吗
english, please?
一场不死不休的决斗
a fight to the death.
如果你能活下来我们就能享受甜蜜的性♥爱♥
and if you survive, we'll make sweet love.
规则很简单
the law is clear.
Fry和Zoidberg将决斗至死
Fry and Zoidberg shall fight to the death
争夺美丽的Edna
for the claw of the beautiful Edna!
但我不想要她啊
but i don't want her!
一旦发出挑战神圣的螯钳决斗
once invoked, the sacred tradition of claw plock
就不能取消
cannot be taken back.
虽然这是最近18年才有的传统
it is a recent tradition, only 18 years old
但它仍旧是传统
but it is a tradition nonetheless!
准备受死吧 Fry
get ready, Fry.
我要把你的鱼鳔挖出来
i'm going to rip your swim bladder out
给你看
and show it to you.
Zoidberg医生 你疯了
Dr. Zoidberg, this is madness!
你失去理智了
you're being irrational!
我当然失去理智了
of course i'm being irrational!
我坠入爱河了
i'm in love!
Leela!
好吧 好吧
right, right.
你们必须停止这种疯狂的行为
you have to stop this madness!
听着 小姐 正如你所看见的
listen, lady, as you can plainly see
我是个有强烈性♥欲♥的雄性，受着“果酱”的折磨
i'm a highly desirable male, groaning with jelly
不过我还是坚持独身
yet i embrace a life of celibacy
就为了维持我们的疯狂传统
in order to uphold our crazy traditions.
你的朋友必须死一个
one of your friends must die!
命运残酷而坚定 不可能被改变
fate is cruel and unyielding, and what must be, must be.
接受下注
taking all bets!
Zoidberg九赔二
i'm giving nine to two on Zoidberg
有尖刺的大蟹 红色的希望
the crab with the jab, the great red hope.
快来下注吧
come on, baby!
Fry 我离开医学院已经好几年了
Fry, it's been years since medical school
提醒我一下 挖出内脏对你们种族...
so remind me: disemboweling in your species
到底致不致命
fatal or non-fatal?
致命
fatal.
大赌注押我自己一回合搞定
large bet on myself in round one!
Edna 在螯钳决斗开始前你有什么要说的
Edna, have you anything to say before begins the claw plock?
我有
i do.
我只是想说 我今天早上起床
i just want to say that today i got up
吃了一片面包
and i had a piece of toast.
然后我刷了牙
then i brushed my teeth...
闭嘴
shut up!
我爱你 Fry
i love you, Fry!
不
no!
Fry 你猜中了我所想的那种动物
Fry, having guessed what animal i was thinking of
你可以优先选择武器
you shall have first choice of weapon.
你呢 医生
and you, doctor?
我就用我自己的钳子
i choose my own claws.
我要享受切碎他生殖器的快♥感♥
i want the tactile pleasure of chopping him
就在这里
right here, in the gonads.
嘘 大家不要纠正他
shh! nobody correct him!
Fry 我从没要求你为我做什么事
Fry, i've never asked you for anything before
不过如果不是太麻烦
but if it's not too much trouble
到第九回合的时候
when it comes to the ninth round
就让他赢吧
just let him win.
可这是生死决斗
but it's a fight to the death!
你就只会考虑你自己
oh, so suddenly this is all about you!
起立 奏国歌♥
please rise for the national anthem.
螯钳决斗开始
let claw plo begin!
加油 Fry
come on, Fry!
死也要死得有尊严
die with dignity!
糟了
oops.
不 我看不下去了
no! i can't stand to look!
切开他
crack him open!
杀了他
kill him!
Fry 快认输
psst! Fry, take a dive!
螯钳决斗 螯钳决斗 螯钳决斗 螯钳决斗 螯钳决斗
claw plock, claw plock, claw plock!
各位水怪
my fellow fish monsters,
我还不够资格来批评你们愚蠢的文明
far be it from me to question your stupid civilization
或者白♥痴♥的传统
or its dumb customs
但用一个巨大的核桃钳子
but is squeezing each other's brains out
夹爆对方的脑袋真能解决所有问题吗
with a giant nutcracker really going to solve anything?
Zoidberg医生是我的朋友
Dr. Zoidberg is my friend
尽管有个女人介入了我们之间
and though a womanhas come between us
我们两个还是朋友
i say we'll always remain friends.
你们知道为什么吗
and do you know why?
一个原因
one reason.
你这混♥蛋♥
飞出个未来（1999）
Futurama
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