飞出个未来（1999）

Futurama S02E07

Part 2 Feb. 14, 2026, 6:10 p.m.

lucky i'm a member
非洲-南极爱好者-美洲亚裔-汽车协会的成员
of the austro-afro-antarctico-amerasian auto association.
你好请问是七Ａ协会吗？
hello. septuple-a?
唉
whew.
我们还得等上几个小时
oh, it'll be a couple hours.
那我的汗衫会被汗水浸湿的
oh, i'm going to get sweat on my sweat suit.
嘿跟我说说
hey, tell me something.
你这么有钱
you've got all this money.
为什么还穿得像个洗衣工
how come you always dress like you're doing your laundry?
因为我爸妈一直要求我
i guess 'cause my parents keep
举止要像淑女
telling me to be more ladylike.
就跟那什么似的
as though.
我懂得
i've been there.
我爸妈以前总是让我好好拾掇自己
my folks were always on me to groom myself
还时时嘱咐我穿好内♥裤♥
and wear underpants.
当我是谁教皇吗？
what am i, the pope?
没错，如果你真是教皇
yeah, and if you were the pope
他们又会说“把你的帽子弄直”
they'd be all, "straighten your pope hat."
和“把礼袍整理好”这种话
and "put on your good vestments."
你知道吗 Fry 能遇到一个
you know, Fry, it's nice to find
跟我谈论这些糟心事的人真是太好了
someone i can talk to about stuff and junk.
是啊我们好像有着同样的遭遇和想法
it's like we feel the same way about junk and stuff
在其他事情上也是
or whatever.
哇哦
oh.
在他们拖着我们的时候
so while they're towing us
你想开干吗？
you want to do it?
当然想！
yeah.
哟哦哦哦
yo-ho-ho-ho!
以上就是我昨晚看的电影的大致情节
which concludes the summary of the movie i saw last night.
还有什么老问题
now, any old business?
没有
no.
那还有什么新问题吗
any new business?
没有
no.
有人昨晚是一起度过的吗？
anyone spend the night together?
没有
no.no.no.
有差不多就那个意思
yep.kind of.
啥？
what?
噢我的天
oh, my god.
我们在水星上把车油耗光了然后事情就这样发生了
we ran out of fuel on mercury and one thing led to another.
后来我们回到家感觉又上来了
and it led there again when we got home.
恭喜你啊 Fry
congratulations, Fry.
你给自己钓到了大鱼
you snagged the perfect girlfriend.
Amy真的超有钱
Amy's rich.
以及别的优点
she's probably got other characteristics.
Bender!
爱情与金钱无关！
romance isn't about money.
那你的意思是说
oh, so it's just coincidence
Zoidberg荷包空空又没有对象
that Zoidberg here is desperately poor
也纯粹是个巧合而已
andmiserably lonely?
拜~~托
puh-lease.
用脚趾头去想也知道那纯粹是因为他太丑了
for your information, it's because he's hideous.
额我感Fry和Amy的CP就像是
well, i think Fry and Amy go together
酸橙配椰汁酒
like a lime and a coconut.
我似乎听到婚礼钟声响起来了？
do i hear wedding bells?
啥？
what?
不
no!
是吗？我的老天爷
really. oh, dear.
你们俩真的很幸运
oh, you're both very lucky.
我就是不惜一切也想终结我的单身生涯
i'd pay anything to end my miserable loneliness.
前提是我口袋里有钱
if only i weren't so desperately poor.
等会儿你是说有人
wait. you mean people
愿意为爱情买♥♥单？
will pay good money for romance?
我好像有了个非常妙的坏主意
i think i have a scheme so deviously clever that i--
判处500元罚金和参加社区服务
$500 and time served.
依据傻♥逼♥的反拉皮条法
stupid anti-pimping laws.
那敢情好把钱给他吧
well, pay the man.
Bender，亲爱的，我们爱你
Bender, honey, we love you.
好的甜心我知道
sure, baby, i know it.
电脑约会安排服务-就跟拉皮条似的
ah, computer dating--it's like pimping
Bender的电脑约会服务
低调且分散
但用不着类似“骑在你头上” 这种黑话
注： "upside your head"是一首色情歌♥曲的歌♥词
but you rarely have to use the phrase "upside your head."
Bender 这也太蠢了
Bender, this is stupid.
怎么可能会有人找你帮忙拉皮条
why would anyone come to you for romantic help?
说话注意点！小心我骑你头上
hey! don't make me go upside your head.
Fry! Amy!
把你们的内♥裤♥穿好！
put your pants back on.
储物室
我要订书机
i need a stapler!
住手住手
stop. stop.
你要是打断了他们的交♥配♥
if you interrupt the mating dance
雄性就会被激怒
the male will become enraged
然后用他可怕的生殖器来伤害我们
and maul us with his fearsome gonad.
这招还挺管用
it's working.
他们以为我们在做什么不可描述的事情
they think we're making out.
等会儿
wait.
我们为啥没在做？
why aren't we making out?
我也不知道
i don't know.
好的您姓什么来着
okay, Mr.--
姓Smith，Zapp Smith Brannigan
Smith. Zapp Smith. Brannigan.
您只需在表格上面勾选出
理想的择偶标准即可
just check off the things
理想的择偶标准即可
you're looking for in a love partner.
让我康康
let's see.
噢好的
oh, yes.
这个得选
yes, definitely.
这个也不错
mmm, i'd like some of that.
我估计上面的框框都得打勾才行
i'll just have everything on the menu.
现在您的表格信息将被录入到
now, to run it
高速非逻辑浪漫数据处理器当中
through our high-speed romance-alogical datafier.
哔-哔-哔-哔
beep-bee-de-beep-beep.
哔-哔-哔-哔
beep. bee-de-bee-beep-beep.
哔
beep.
来跟您的另一半问好吧
say hello to miss right.
你好
hello.
我们俩的吻技还真不赖
we're great kissers.
嘿待会你想到木卫二星转一圈吗
hey, later, you want to drive out to europa?
我们可以在那儿野个餐
we could have a picnic
还能对着木星吐西瓜籽儿
and spit watermelon seeds at jupiter.
听起来不错
hey, yeah.
我在20世纪的时候也随口吐过东西
i used to spit at stuff back in the 20th century.
我们俩这么投机真是太难得了
ah, it's cool how we sort of think exactly alike
臭味相投的投
and junk.
没错
yeah.
你知道吗 Fry 我真的很喜欢跟你待一块儿
you know, Fry, i really like hanging out with you.
当时一切都很好
everything was going great.
然后突然她就开始谈论在一起的事了
then all of a sudden, she's talking about hanging out.
在一起？
hanging out?
她未免太认真了
she's getting way too serious.
我可不会吊死在一棵树上 Leela
i'm not a one-woman man, Leela.
你很快就会恢复单身的常态了
you'll be back to zero soon enough.
你不明白我的意思吗？她想捆住我
don't you get it? she's smothering me.
嗨
hi.
看见没你看见没
you see? you see?
现在她敢在我♥干♥活的时候骚扰我了
now she's bothering me when i'm at work.
Fry~
我在干活呢 Amy就来了
i'm doing my job--there's Amy.
我在贩卖♥♥机面前站了几个小时选糖果时
i spend a few hours selecting a candy from the machine--
她又来了
there's Amy.
我跟她春宵一夜早上起来
i wake up the morning after sleeping with Amy--
发现她还在那儿
there's Amy.
我觉得你反应过度了
i think you're overreacting.
有吗？
am i?
有吗？