马男波杰克

BoJack Horseman S03E07

Part 1 Feb. 17, 2020, 10:47 a.m.

伙计们我觉得这里可以再装个电♥话♥插孔
Guys, I think we could use another phone jack over here.
这里奇迹拼车我们想要伸出双手抓住你
Cabracadabra. We wanna reach out and grab you.
不我们是出租车公♥司♥
No, we're a cab company.
你能把那个扔给我吗
Can you toss me the thing?
-抱歉是另一个 -好的注意沙发
- Sorry. The other thing. - Okay. Watch the couch.
洛杉矶公报
该死
Hey. Goddammit!
非常抱歉我理解
I apologize for... I understand.
您能等一下吗
Mind if I put you on hold for just one second?
别再让我等了你知道我是谁吗
Don't put me on hold again. Do you know who I am?
我刚刚赢得了婴儿选择奖过去15年中
I just won a Baby's Choice Award, the winner of which
该奖获得者有七年都捧回了奥斯卡奖杯
has gone to take home the Oscar seven of the last 15 years.
是的就是那个马男波杰克
So, yeah, that BoJack Horseman.
而不是一个你可以一直
Otherwise known as the guy
发一些无聊的报纸给他的人
you keep sending your dumb newspaper to
关键是我从没有订阅过
even though I never subscribed to it.
您先等着
I'm putting you on hold.
-我们遇到麻烦了先生 -说
- I think we have a situation, sir. - Talk to me, rep.
一个叫马男波杰克的人好像挺生气的
Guy's name is BoJack Horseman. He's pretty steamed.
我试了所有办法
I've tried everything,
但我们可能得需要终结者来处理这件事
but I think we might need to bring the Closer in on this one.
冷静不用找终结者
Calm down. I'm sure we can sort this out
我们也能解决这件事
without having to get the Closer involved.
你有给他26周报纸费用对折优♥惠♥吗
Did you offer him 26 weeks at 50 percent off the newsstand price?
我试了所有优♥惠♥项目先生
I went through the entire checklist, sir.
甚至给了他一个免费的大手提袋
Even offered him a free tote bag.
天哪什么样的怪兽会拒绝大手提袋
Gesus, what kind of monster says no to a tote bag?
你做得很好
All right, good work, rep.
你已经尽力了
You've done all that could be expected of you.
现在交给我
I'll take it from here.
贝蒂·布鲁斯副♥主♥席♥
好的知道了我理解交给我吧
Yeah, Got it. Right. I understand. I'll take it from here.
上帝帮帮我们吧
God help us...
每当需要上帝帮助我都会这么说
Is what I'd say if we needed God's help.
幸运的是有更好的东西能帮助我们
Fortunately, we got one better.
终结者
早上好周末过得怎么样你好
Morning. Good morning. How was your weekend? How are you?
很好昨天干得不错早上好请让开
I'm fine. Good work yesterday. Good morning. Get out of my way, please.
二号♥线遇到了麻烦
We have a situation on line two.
叫马男马男波杰克
Name's Horseman. BoJack Horseman.
谢谢交给我吧
Thank you. I'll take it from here.
早上好非常真诚地向你问候
Hello, good morning, and I say this with 100 percent sincerity...
请问有什么能帮到你的
How can I help you?
马男波杰克第三季第七集
我从未订过《洛杉矶公报》
I never subscribed to the L.A.Gazette.
我也从不看《洛杉矶公报》
I do not read the L.A. Gazette.
我已经打了很多次电♥话♥叫你们别送报纸来了
I have called this number so many times to ask you to stop sending it to me.
但是每天早上我打开门
Yet every morning, I open my door
就能看到一份新的《洛杉矶公报》
on a new edition of the L.A. Gazette.
这感觉就像是一集无聊的《阴阳魔界》在上演
It's like I'm living in a really boring episode of The Twilight Zone.
先生我们马上解开这场送报之谜
Sir, we are going to unravel this mystery.
但在这之前我能给您拿点什么吗
But before we dig in, is there anything I can get you?
一杯冰水如何
A glass of ice water perhaps?
好的一杯冰水不错
Yeah, sure, I'd love a glass of ice water.
太好了乔尼马上送到三二一
Fabulous. Johnny will get that to you in three, two, one...
洛杉矶公报客户信息
我看你接收我们的报纸也有六个月了
Now I see you've been receiving our paper for six months,
但记录显示你根本就没投诉过
but there's no record of you ever registering a complaint.
请问不满是何时开始的呢
From whence the hostility, counselor?
也就最近因为一周前
It wasn't a problem until recently, because up until a week ago
跟我一起住的那个人
the boy who lives with me was using
用报纸做了一个超大的纸糊陶德头
the paper to make a giant paper-mache Todd head.
-抱歉什么 -我跟我死党陶德住一起
- I'm sorry, what was that? - I live with my best friend, Todd.
人还不错就是有时候喜欢想一出是一出
He's a good kid, but sometimes he gets ideas to do things.
-很恐怖对吧 -是啊这是什么鬼东西
- Pretty scary, right? - Yes. What the hell is that?
大型陶德头啊
Giant Todd Head, of course.
过去六个月我都在做这个
I've been working on him for the last six months.
什么为什么呀
What? Why?
一切全因那个从厨房♥发出的沙沙声
It all started when a rustling from the kitchen
把我从浅睡眠中惊醒而起
jostled me from tender slumber.
什么东西
What was that?
如果是鬼请您不要尖叫
If there's a ghost present, please do not scream
或长着一张骷髅脸或穿着一件白锻破长袍
or have a skull face or be wearing a tattered white satin gown.
有人或是有东西在偷我们的食物
Someone or something is stealing our food.
所以我做了一个超大的纸糊陶德头把它吓走
So I made a giant papier-mache todd head to scare it away.
觉得会有用吗
Think it'll work?
如果我做了一个超大的马男纸糊头
If I made a giant papier-mache me head,
你会停止吃我的食物吗
would you stop eating my food?
你应该严肃一点我们可能被入侵了
You should take this seriously. We might have an infestation.
我们的确被入侵了被陶德们
We do have an infestation, of Todds.
看看那头他们越来越猖獗了
And when you ook at that, they're getting bigger.
然后呢它有解决你的昆虫入侵小问题吗
And? Did the head help to ameliorate your pest peccadillo?
没有陶德一开始
No. Todd abandoned the project
着手奇迹拼车就搁置了这件事
as soon as he started working on Cabracadabra.
-什么是奇迹拼车 -我之前也是这么说的
- What's Cabracadabra? - That's what I said.
奇迹拼车
-什么是奇迹拼车 -我之前也是这么说的
- What's Cabracadabra? - That's what I said.
-什么是奇迹拼车 -我们就等着你这么说
- What's Cabracadabra? - That's what we want you to say.
我不懂你是不是要跟我说说
If I didn't know any better, I think you were about to pitch an idea.
-我们正要跟你说 -我还是不懂
- We are about to pitch you an idea. - I did not know better.
你有遇到过这种事吗喂你往哪走呢
Has this ever happened to you? Hey, where you headed?
是啊我一直都遇到这种事
Oh, yes. That happens to me all the time.
-我们还没说到正点上呢 -抱歉请继续
- We're not at the main part yet. - I'm so sorry. Please continue.
-去歌♥剧院先生 -好的
- To the opera, good sir. - Okay.
我是要看看所有事是否都发生在了我身上
Am I watching to see if the whole thing has happened to me?
-还是某一件特别的事 -两者兼有吧
- Or am I looking for one specific thing? - Kind of both.
所以我只要一直看着你们
So I just keep watching
直到有相同的事情发生在我身上吗
until I see something that has happened to me?
-是的 -要是到最后
- Yes. - What if we get to the end,
这些事情都没发生在我身上过呢
and none of it has ever happened to me?
你能站在艾米丽的立场想想吗
Maybe just try to put yourself in Emily's shoes right now.
知道了抱歉打断你们请继续
Got it, got it. Sorry for the interruption. Please continue.
-那么这就是你住的地方吗 -是的
- So, is this where you live? - Yes, it is.
一个人住还是跟男朋友住
Alone or are you in a relationship?
这样问不太好吧
This hardly seems appropriate.
司机你开始让我感觉不舒服了
Driver, you're starting to make me feel uncomfortable.
是啊陶德你在干嘛
Yeah, Todd. What are you doing?
有没有奇怪的司机给你他的电♥话♥号♥码
Has a creepy driver ever given you his number
或是告诉你你让他想起了他死去的女朋友
or told you that you reminded him of his dead girlfriend?
或是缓慢地重复你的地址
Or repeated your address slowly,
好像他要记下来一样
like he was trying to memorize it?
-没遇到过 -不幸的是如果你是位女性
- No, never. - Unfortunately, if you are a woman
每天你都会遇到这样的事
all those things would happen to you every day.
没错陶德根据我的调查
That's right, Todd. According to my own research,
男人十有八♥九♥都是人♥渣♥变♥态♥ 糟糕透顶
nine out of ten men are total dirtbag creeps, just the worst.
可如果有一个拼车软件保证没有变♥态♥男司机
But what if there was a ride-share service that could guarantee
原因是根本不会有男司机
no creepy men drivers because there are no men drivers at all?
什么意思机器人来开车吗
What are you saying, robot drivers?
要是它们忽然有了感情开始杀人或者成立组织呢
What if they become sentient and try to murder us, or unionize?
那可就真的麻烦了
That could be a real headache.
不没有机器人是女司机
No, not murderous robots. Women.
陶德你再次做到了
Todd, you have done it again.
其实是我跟艾米莉一起想的
Actually, Emily and I came up with it together.
陶德和艾米莉你们第一次"再次做到了"
Todd and Emily, you've done it again for the first time.
奇迹拼车
让女性坐上驾驶位
所以我们要在你家创业了
And that's why we're setting up shop at your house.
为什么一定要是我家
..Why does it have to be my house?
花生酱先生家完全没有地方
There's no room at Mr. Peanutbutter's house.
都被意大利面过滤器填满了
It's full of spaghetti strainers.
-为什么 -谁记得呢
- Why? - Who can recall?
我觉得它们放得越久收益越大
I figure the longer they're there, the bigger the payoff.
它们已经放了几个月了
And they've been sitting there for months now.
所以收益一定是相当可观
So you can bet the payoff's going to be pretty huge.