马男波杰克

BoJack Horseman S03E02

Part 3 Feb. 17, 2020, 10:46 a.m.

Cookie chartreuse brontosaurus, I think I'm having a stroke.
天呐睡过头了吗
Jeez, sleep much?
天呐你看着我睡过头吗
Jeez, watch me sleep much?
我睡不着
Well, I couldn't sleep.
我一直在想今天第一次对台词的事
I kept thinking about today's first read-through.
这种事情一向很杀脑细胞
These things are always so nerve-wracking,
要人坐在那里
to sit there and perform
在所有人面前进行表演就像...
for all these people like some kind of a--
-就像职业演员吗 -真好笑
- Professional actor? - Very funny.
在忘了之前我先把礼物给你
Before I forget, I got you a present.
是个盒子...还有皱成一团的纸巾在里面
It's a box... with crinkly tissue paper inside it.
你怎么知道我好这口
How did you know?
谢谢你帮我把所有事情都安排妥当
Thank you for putting this whole thing together.
尽管我还是无法相信你居然说服我了
Even though I still can't believe I let you talk me into this.
你保证一切都没问题吗
Promise me everything's going to be okay?
我保证一切都会很顺利的
I promise it's gonna be great.
如果你怯场了就在观众里找我
If you get scared, look for me in the audience.
我会一直坐在那里
I'll be there the whole time,
比所有人都笑得大声卖♥♥力喝彩
laughing and cheering louder than anyone.
"米奇把酒瓶甩进垃圾堆里砸出很大的声音"
"Mitch tosses the vodka bottle into the garbage. Thud."
"别了老友"
"Goodbye, old friend."
"米奇把灯和门给关了而整个舞台...
"Mitch turns off the light and closes the door as we...
也逐渐融入黑暗本集完"
Fade to black. End of episode."
谢谢你们
Thank you.
让我们看看电视台领导怎么说
Let's see what the suits say.
我敢打赌他们想让剧情更平淡点
Bet they're gonna want to bland it up,
好吸引中产阶级来收看
make it appeal to middle America.
这就是美国最烂的地方
That's the worst part of America.
直接排除掉底层人♥民♥和上层人♥民♥
Other than the bottom, the top and most of the sides.
波杰克可爱胡我们还能说什么呢
BoJack, Cuddlywhiskers, what can we say?
这就是为什么你们是专家我们是蠢蛋啊
This is why you guys are the pros and we're just the schmoes.
我想我老公是想说 "干得漂亮"
I think what my husband is trying to say is, "Great job."
行了行了甜言蜜语说够了
All right, all right, enough with the torture.
没必要搞胡萝卜加大棒这套有什么批评尽管说吧
Don't have to feed me to finger me. Just lay on the notes.
我们唯一的批评就是没有批评
Our only note? No notes.
-没有批评吗 -我们大爱这个剧
- No notes? - We love this show.
波杰克我现在就敢断言
BoJack, I'm calling it right now.
这部剧会和《胡闹的小马》一样大获成功
This show is gonna be as big as Horsin' Around.
接着贾斯丁说 "杰西卡·贝尔吗
And then Justin said, "Jessica Biel?
你真是太令人难以杰西卡置信了"
You are un-Jessica-Bielievable."
这太搞笑了
It was so funny.
看来你和这个贾斯丁真的很合得来啊
It seems like you're really in sync with this Justin guy.
你应该和他一起做那些没法和我一起做的事
You should do all the things with him that I can't do.
比如说吃巧克力看烟花看网球赛
Like eat chocolate, or enjoy fireworks, or watch tennis.
为什么网球让我如此抓狂啊
Why, tennis makes me so mad.
为什么就没人把网球给接住啊
Why doesn't anyone ever catch the ball?
有人吗这地方能来人给我们提供点服务吗
Hello? Can we please get some service in this place?
我可是著名演员杰西卡·贝尔
I'm famous actress Jessica Biel.
杰西卡大咖军的一员
I'm one of the Jessicas.
老妈我的文章终于要被发表了
Mom, I'm finally gonna be a published writer.
我那篇《致公♥开♥信♥的公♥开♥信♥》
My "Open Letter to Open Letters"
将被发表在麦克斯威尼上
is going to be published in McSweeney's.
麦什么他是谁爱尔兰人吗
Mc-What? Who's that? Some Irish?
不是的妈妈那是个非常受欢迎的网站
No, Mom. It's a very popular website.
不不不不不我才不会上这个当
Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm not falling for that scam.
网站我们还得用自己的纸和墨打出来吗
Website? We gotta print it out on our own paper with our own ink?
-我才不要 -老妈
- I don't think so. - Mom.
我那"重磅炸♥弹♥"原创系列让我忙得团团转
And my Blockbuster original series has been keeping me very busy.
我还是不明白那是怎么运作的完全不明白
I still don't get how that's gonna work, at all.
宝贝这完全说得通啊
Babe, it makes total sense.
他们把一整季的内容刻在六张DVD上
They make the whole season, put it on six DVD's.
人们可以到当地的"重磅炸♥弹♥"音像店
People go to their local Blockbuster Video
一次借一张碟一张碟租期为五天
and rent it out one disc at a time for five days each.
如果自己想看的那几集被人租走了怎么办
What if someone already rented the episodes they want?
那就看些别的啊
They can just get something else,
比如说《魔术师》或者《致命魔术》
like The Illusionist or The Prestige.
-你演的就行 -你知道我演的是哪部吗
- Whichever one you were in. - Do you know which one?
你知道吗
Do you?
你为什么什么都答应呢
Why do you say yes to everything?
一想到事情的可能性我就会兴奋
I get excited by the possibilities.
快看咖啡店里有唱片真是太疯狂了
Look, a CD, at a coffee shop? That is crazy.
-买♥♥啦 -不行
- Buying it. - No.
放下放下
Drop it. Drop it.
乖狗狗
Good boy.
-你听到电视台那边怎么说没 -他们说很喜欢
- You heard what the network said. - Heard they loved it.
我也听到了噢
Yoo-hoo! I also heard that.
没错电视台方面很喜欢
Exactly. The network loved it.
很明显我们还是不够剑走偏锋
Obviously, we're playing it too safe.
如果想听听我的意见伙计别太钻牛角尖了
If you want my opinion, fellas, you hit oil, stop drilling.
"我是石油工人我喝着你的奶昔"
"I am an oil man. I drink your milkshake."
《血色将至》台词
这在一两年内还是会挺搞笑的
That'll be funny in a year or so.
在变得伤感和尴尬之前
Before that got sad and weird,
你说"如果想听听我的意见" 然而我们不想
you said, "If you want my opinion," and we don't.
可爱胡你说你想搞出点不一样的名堂
Cuddlywhiskers, you told me you wanted to do something different.
现在我们就在做一件
Now we're doing something
将会"和《胡闹的小马》一样棒"的事
that's gonna be "Just as good as Horsin' Around."
这就是你想要的吗我可不是为这来的
Is that what you wanted? Because that's not why I'm here.
-我知道 -波杰克我真觉得你这是在犯错
- I know. - Bojack, I really think you're making a mistake.
我可不会听某个
I'm not about to take career advice
干了14年助理的人的职场建议
from somebody who's been an assistant for the last 14 years.
你就是那样看我的吗你经纪人的助理
Is that how you think of me? As your agent's assistant?
-你觉得你是什么 -我不知道
- What do you think you are? - I don't know.
友情提示你应该知道
Here's some free advice: you should know.
不如把这事儿交给成年人处理吧
Why don't you leave this to the grown-ups?
如果有人要喝咖啡我会给你打电♥话♥的
If somebody needs coffee, I'll give you a ring.
好吧祝你好运
Okay, best of luck.
可爱胡让我们用一个晚上的时间
Cuddlywhiskers, let's give ourselves one night
为这个剧本蛋精竭虑
to stick our dicks in this script
把它透透彻彻地研究一遍
and go balls deep into the universe.
来吧
I'm in.
你说什么引起恐慌在迪厅吗
What's that, you say? There's a panic? At the disco?
等下我先挂了宝贝你有什么事
Hold on, I gotta go. What do you want, Toots?
我想当经纪人我觉得我准备好了
I want to be an agent. I think I'm ready.
又来唠叨"我想当女经纪人"了
Again with this "I wanna be a female agent" thing.
都不知道该怎么叫你女经纪人母经纪人
They don't even have a word for it. Uh, agentess, agentrix.
-就叫"经纪人" 马弗经纪人 -好好
- It's just called "Agent", Marv, agent. - Okay, okay!
你是个经纪人行了吧我封你为经纪人
You're an agent, all right? I dub thee agent.
你还可以用我的办公室因为我不干了
You can even take my office, because I quit.
-什么 -谁吃饱撑的想头疼啊
- What? - Who needs the headache?
我为这份工作打拼了三十年
Thirty years I threw into this job
却被它从内到外糟蹋得不成人样
and it destroyed me from the inside out.
我从没爱过谁我不曾有过家
I never fell in love, I never had a family.
甚至连那个穿着花边衣服的泰迪熊
I never even got to give that lacy teddy
都没能送给车管所的那个恶毒女人
to the mean woman who worked at the DMV.
我只有满腔悔恨
All I have is regrets.
我的天啊我是经纪人了终于成功了
Oh, my God, I'm an agent! I'm gonna make it after all.
我要做的第一件事就是把那个吊扇拆了
First thing I'm gonna do is get rid of that ceiling fan.
我们怎么做才能表明这不是《胡闹的小马》
How do we make it clear that this isn't Horsin' Around?
假如一开场我们就让我的角色实实在在地
What if in the very first scene, we show my character
往一盘《胡闹的小马》录像带上拉一泡怎么样
literally taking a massive dump on a VHS copy of Horsin' Around?
什么太疯狂了吧
What? That's insane.
等等先写进去反正等下可以删掉
Wait, let's just put it in, we can always take it out later.
我希望这个角色的脾气非常爆
I want this character to be really edgy,
就像那种想让丹尼斯·利瑞演的角色却说
like, the kind of character Denis Leary would be offered and then say:
"我觉得这个角色性格太暴躁了"
"This character's too edgy for me."
假如他的口头禅恰恰是最没个人风格的口头禅呢
What if he had a catchphrase that was an anti-catchphrase?
就像每次他一进屋
Like if every time he entered the room
他就会说"干嘛呢小婊砸们"
he was like, "Whassup, bitches?"
不能用那句太恶俗了但差不多就那样
Not that, because that's horrible. But something like that.
干嘛呢小婊砸们
Whassup, bitches?