少男奶爸（2012）

Baby Daddy S03E15

Part 1 Nov. 30, 2020, 2:35 p.m.

And just when they thought all hope was lost--
就在他们以为希望都破灭的时候
Hi. Oh, no. Am I too late?
我来了不会吧我是不是来晚了
Did I miss story time?
我错过故事时间了吗
No no no. We're just getting to the good part.
没有没有精彩部分刚刚开始呢
So he turned up the music, threw a raging party...
于是他把音乐声调大办了一场疯狂的派对
And fell in love with a hooker.
然后跟一个妓♥女♥坠入了爱河
Oh, I get to be the hooker.
那我演那个妓♥女♥
And that wraps up tonight's edition
这就是今晚跟爸爸一起的
of drive-in with daddy.
电影环节圆♥满♥结束了
Wow. "Risky Business."
竟然是《乖仔也疯狂》
Kind of threw me there,
没想到啊
'cause I thought tonight's movie was "Goldilocks."
我还以为今晚是《金发女孩和三只小熊》呢
Oh, well,
额这个嘛
Tucker was tired of being the baby bear.
塔克尔演够小熊了
Well, I do enjoy these father-daughter moments.
我很喜欢这种父女相处的时刻
And in fact, you've kind of inspired me
说实话你们激励了我
to find my own biological father.
让我想去找找自己的亲生父亲
Which by the way, I have.
顺便说一句已经找到了
No way!
不是吧
Yes, way. Well, ever since
是的自从我发现
I found out that aunt margot actually gave birth to me,
我其实是玛戈特姑姑生的
I've wanted to know who he is,
我就一直想知道亲生父亲是谁
but my mom forbid Margot from saying anything.
但是我妈什么都不让玛戈特说
So my dad slipped me his old yearbook
于是我养父偷偷把他以前的年鉴给我了
and said "Page 37, Mark Clements.
还悄悄说了句"37页马克·克莱门茨"
That's the bastard who knocked up your aunt Margot."
就是那个混♥蛋♥上了你玛戈特姑姑
I love my dad.
我爱我爸爸
Attention, ladies and gentlemen,
女士们先生们大家请注意
parents arriving momentarily.
"父母（站）"马上就到了
Next stop, dysfunction junction.
下一站 "功能障碍枢纽站"
And they're here.
他们到了
Let the judging begin.
我的批判大会要开始了
Tucker. Dad.
塔克尔爸爸
Wait, where's mom?
不对妈呢
See, I told her you'd notice.
看到了吧我早就说了你会发现的
I said, "Joanne, the boy's gonna notice."
我跟她说乔安妮孩子会发现的
Dad, what's going on? Is something wrong?
爸怎么了出什么事了吗
Not at all.
没事
Your mother and I are getting a divorce.
我跟你妈要离婚
So...
这样...
Then the three little bears,
那三只小熊
trying to avoid a very awkward situation,
为了避免尴尬局面
all took goldilocks to bed. Let's go.
一起带着金发女孩睡觉去了快走
You know, the big one isn't wearing pants.
刚才那个大块头没穿裤子你看到了吗
**It's amazing how the unexpected*
*人生妙无边惊喜无极限
**can take your life and change directions.*
*劝君莫等闲雌雄随我愿
第三季第十五集
少男奶爸
Divorced?
离婚
Dude, I cannot believe I'm going to be from a broken home.
老兄我真不敢相信我也要有一个破碎的家了
Well, technically four broken homes
其实是四个
if you count our vacation properties.
如果把度假去的房♥子也算上的话
I know what you're going through, bud.
我知道你现在的心情哥们
When my parents got divorced, it was horrible.
我父母离婚时简直太恐怖了
The constant shuttling back and forth,
假期里不停的辗转奔波
splitting holidays,
这里待两天那里待两天
never really knowing where to call home.
根本就不知道哪里才是真正的家
You were 24.
你当时都24了
Hey, maybe I can talk to your dad.
要不让我去跟你♥爸♥谈谈吧
I'm sure whatever happened was his fault.
无论如何姐敢肯定都是他的错
I could certainly point that out to him for you.
姐可以现在就帮你做出这个论断
I don't know. I mean, if someone's gonna
这样真的好吗我是说如果要给我爸爸
give my dad advice about marriage,
关于婚姻方面的建议
shouldn't it be someone who was good at it?
不该让婚姻成功的人去吗
Hey, I was brilliant at it.
我做得很好好吗
He was gay at it.
都是因为他是基佬
Well, my mom says he's too uptight at it.
我妈说我爸太呆板保守了
Too uptight?
太呆板保守
Now that I can fix.
这个姐也可以搞定
That's a good idea.
这其实是个好主意啊
Dude, I can fix him.
我可以让他不呆板不保守啊
I just need to loosen him up a bit,
我就需要让他放松一下就行了
and nobody is more laid back than me.
要数放松闲散不呆板除了我还有谁
Dude, would it kill you to use a coaster?
老兄垫上茶杯垫你会死吗
Oh, and remember to scrub that for a full 20 seconds
对了记住要擦洗满20秒哦
using circular motions.
要这样打圈擦洗哦
He's hilarious.
他真是太逗了
Like I'm gonna wash this.
说得好像我会擦洗一样
What are we gonna do?
我们该怎么办
Tucker doesn't have a laid back bone in his body.
塔克尔天生就没放松随便的细胞
I know. He caught me reading his journal
我知道我看他的日记被他发现了
and he got all mad about it.
结果他就跟发疯了一样
Maybe you could go out with Mr. Dobbs.
要不你跟多不思先生一起出去玩玩
You know, loosen him up. Show him a good time.
给他放松放松让他享受下人生
Well, I think the no fun police has plans of his own.
我觉得那个扫兴狂有自己的计划
It could be our little secret.
这秘密可以只有你知我知嘛
Like your hair color and your real age.
就像你的真实发色和年龄一样
Good morning. Hey, mom.
早啊妈
I was just flipping through your old yearbook.
我刚才在翻你的高中纪念册
I didn't know you were voted
我还不知道你当选过
"Most likely to be a grandma before the age of 50."
"最可能在五十岁前当奶奶的人"
On behalf of Emma, you're welcome.
我代艾玛向你说声不用谢
See this. Ahh.
来瞧瞧
Dated him,
这个老娘泡过
Dated him,
这个也泡过
Way more than dated him.
这个可是被我吃得干干净净了
God, we had some hot teachers at school.
天哪那会学校的老师还真是性感
Where'd you get this?
你从哪翻出来的
Uh, Riley left it here.
是莱丽忘在这的
She's trying to track down her biological father.
她想找出她的生父到底是谁
Oh, David Brinkerhoff?
大卫·宾克霍夫吗
Uh, no. Mark Clements.
不是马克·克莱门斯
Margot's old boyfriend.
玛戈特的旧相好
Oh, no no no. Mark and Margo
不不不马克和玛戈特
may have been going steady,
或许是有那么一段
But Margot and David were going all the way.
但玛戈特跟大卫才是玩真的
Oh my god, really?
天哪真的吗
I gotta go stop Riley from calling the wrong guy daddy.
我得赶紧去阻止莱丽以免她叫错爹
But first, I gotta take care of the girl who calls me daddy.
但我得先照顾好叫我爹的宝贝
Or at least she should be. Seriously, it's not that hard.
也该是时候了真的一点都不难哦
Da-da. Da-da.
爸比爸比
Okay, I tried.
好吧我尽力了
Ben, hi.
本我来了
Oh, Riley. Good you're here.
莱丽你来了就好
Sorry if I pulled you out of court.
抱歉我耽误了你上庭
Oh, shoot.
该死
I knew I had something to do today.
我就记得今天好像有什么事要做
Sorry, I've just been so busy working on my bio dad file.
抱歉我忙着找我生父的资料去了
Everything there is to know about Mark Clements is in here.
关于马克·克莱门斯的一切都在里面
Yeah, about that--
关于这个
Married twice, divorced once, two sons,
两次结婚一次离婚育有二子
so there's still an opening for daddy's little girl.
这么说"爸爸的宝贝女儿"这一职位仍然空缺哦
And oh, get this. Get this.
还有听着
He's a successful, high powered, Manhattan attorney.
他是一名位高权重的曼哈顿律师
Hello? Chip meet block.
瞧有其父必有其女
Or rush meet judgment.
这话是不是说得有点早了
He was also a high school jock, me.
他还是高中运动健将跟我一样
President of his college debate club, me.
大学辩论社主席跟我一样
And allergic to shellfish.
还有对贝类过敏
Me me me.
完全跟我一样嘛
I'm so excited.
我好激动