少男奶爸（2012）

Baby Daddy S03E07

Part 1 Nov. 30, 2020, 2:33 p.m.

Enjoying your flight today, Emma?
今天飞得爽吗艾玛
Just warn me if we're heading for Aca-puko, okay?
要是不小心飞往九霄云外记得提醒爸比哦
Knockknock! Danny? Riley, hi.
叮咚丹尼在吗莱丽你来了啊
Ben, don't bother. I'm not talking to you.
本别白费力气了我是不会跟你说话的
But if I were I'd be saying,
但是如果我跟你说话我会说
"I can't believe you slept with Heather."
真不敢相信你竟然跟海瑟上♥床♥了
Listen, listen, I'm so sorry. Really, I don't need to
听我说对不起我不需要你...
Just hear me out. I don't wanna hear the whole thing!
听我说完我不想听你解释
It's really not necessary! Just shut up already!
真的没这个必要你能先闭嘴吗
I'm trying to apologize here.
我这不是想跟你道歉吗
Listen, I am so sorry I slept with Heather.
跟海瑟上♥床♥的事我真的很抱歉
If I knew you hated her,
如果我知道你讨厌她
I would've done the right thing--
我就肯定不会犯这种错了
I would've snuck her out the fire escape.
我肯定会把她偷偷从安全出口送走的
Is your brother here or not? Not.
你哥哥到底在不在不在
Okay. No no, Riley, wait wait wait.
那我走了等等先别走莱丽
Please please please. I promise you
你听我说我向你保证
I will never ever hook up with Heather again.
以后再也不跟海瑟来往了
Well, you couldn't even if you wanted to,
你倒是想可惜没机会了
so not really that big of a sacrifice.
所以这种保证你没什么损失
Oh... I could.
谁说没机会了
She was into me, but I'm choosing not to,
她可很喜欢我但是我不会再跟她一起了
Because I'm just that kinda guy.
因为我就是那种有原则的人啦
Oh. Well, sorry to burst your man-bubble,
不好意思打破你的美梦了
but Heather only used you to get even with me.
但其实海瑟只是利用你报复我而已
And it just helped that you have no morals or integrity.
你这样没道德没节操真是太好了
Oh? Really? Oh, okay. Yeah.
这样啊真的吗真的
Would a woman... who never wants to see me again
那一个不想再见到我的女人
leave an earring?
会把一只耳环留下吗
She's practically moving in!
这等同于搬进来住了你懂吗
Oh. Okay. Whatever you say, yeah.
好吧随你怎么说
Well, I say I could go out with her again any time I wanted to.
我说只要我想我就能再约到她
Well, I say I challenge you.
我说我不相信
Oh, really? Are we gonna go there?
真的吗我们真的要到这个地步吗
Oh, I think we're already there.
我觉得我们已经走到那一步了
Fine. I bet I can go on a date with heather
行啊我打赌肯定能在未来两天内
in the next 48 hours. And I accept that bet.
再跟海瑟一起出去约会我跟你打这个赌
should we wager the usual?
那要跟平常一样下赌注吗
How about the usual deluxe?
赌那个最大的怎么样
Oh man.
瞧好吧
Oh, this is gonna be good. Okay.
这下有好戏看了好
Hey, what's up, Heather? It's Ben.
你好海瑟我是本
Wheeler.
本·维勒呀
We had sex.
我们上过床
Heather? Heather!
海瑟海瑟
She's gonna call me back.
她说一会儿再打给我
**It's amazing how the unexpected*
*人生妙无边惊喜无极限
**can take your life and change directions.*
*劝君莫等闲雌雄随我愿
Dude, any ideas? I need to get the date with Heather
老兄怎么办我必须得跟海瑟约会啊
or I'm gonna be on the wrong end of the usual deluxe,
我下了那么大的赌注这下要输了
and I am not shaving off my eyebrows...
我可不想把眉毛刮掉
again.
还不是第一次了
Well, I think your best bet is to go build a time machine
我觉得你现在最好还是去造个时光机
and go back to a time... before you were an idiot.
用那个回到以前你还不是个白♥痴♥的日子
All right. Well, I am off to the park to meet a lady.
太棒了我要去公园跟姑娘约会了
All I need is a bottle, a binky and a baby.
只要给我一个奶瓶一个奶嘴外加一个宝宝就够了
Do you ever wonder why you're single? Because I don't.
你想过自己为什么单身吗因为我没想过
Ever why you're folding onesies
你想过为什么你在叠婴儿装
while I'm going to pick up a girl?
而我要出门跟姑娘约会吗
Because I don't.
因为我也没想过
Dude, are you using Emma to meet women again?
哥们你是又要利用艾玛跟女人约会吗
Yes.
对
And I also use her
而且我还利用她
to cut through long bathroom lines.
去厕所外面排队的人群里插队
Sorry, Tucker, but Emma's gonna get me a date
抱歉塔克尔但是今天艾玛要帮我找姑娘了
and help me win a bet.
并且还要帮我赢下一场赌局
Okay, baby, Time to earn your formula. Whoo!
好啦宝贝你赚奶粉喝的时候到了
Onesie?
一起叠婴儿装吗
Boys...
孩子们
I'm having a crisis.
我有麻烦了
Is it a real crisis or the kind where you just need
是真的麻烦还是你只是需要
a glass of chardonnay to cheer you up?
一杯白葡萄酒提提神
No, but thanks for the reminder.
不是但谢谢你提醒我
Okay, after much soul-searching,
经过一番深思熟虑之后
I've decided that I've gotta break up with Brad.
我决定跟布拉德分手
You know, he's just too young and immature.
他太年轻太不成熟了
It turns out once we have our clothes on,
原来当我们穿回衣服后
we have nothing in common!
我们根本没有任何共同话题
But, mom, Brad's awesome!
可是老妈布拉德超赞的好吗
He likes to play air hockey,
他喜欢玩桌上气垫球
he always lets me win at "Dino Hunter IV"
玩《恐龙猎人四》时他总让着我
and he's got the entire secret menu memorized at the Burger Barn.
而且还能一字不漏地背下汉堡农庄的秘密菜单
And you wanna know why I'm single?
你还笑话我找不到女朋友吗
Mom, if you dump him, he'll dump me.
老妈如果你甩了他他就不会再跟我玩了
I broke up with your friend Jimmy Balding
当年我跟你朋友吉米·博丁吹了以后
and he didn't dump you.
他也没不跟你玩呀
You dated Jimmy Balding?!
你还跟吉米·博丁约过会
No! Who said that?! No.
才没有谁说的当然没有
Okay, I just need to think of the best way
我现在只需要想出一个最合适
to break up with Brad without hurting his feelings.
又不会伤害到布拉德的分手理由就好了
I got you covered. Fake move to Mexico.
我有个主意你可以假装搬去墨西哥
Yes.
这个好
I got a guy who will send a postcard for you.
我还能帮你找到代寄明信片的人
Oh. Yeah.
真的吗小意思
Just ask for Bonifacio.
打过去找博尼法西奥就好
It's him. Bonifacio?
是他打来的博尼法西奥吗
Brad.
是布拉德
Okay, you know what?
这么着吧
I think that I'm just gonna get it over with. okay?
我决定现在就把这事彻底了结了
Hey, Brad. Look--
布拉德听着
You what? Okay, I'll be right there!
你说什么好我马上去
He's in the hospital!
他进医院了
Why does bad stuff always happen to me?!
为什么倒霉的事总发生在我头上
Oh my god, Brad. Are you okay?
天哪布拉德你还好吗
Dude, what happened?
哥们你怎么了
Well, I was showing the new brad pad
当时我正在带客人看♥房♥♥
and the last thing I remember
然后不知怎么的
were the elevator doors just closing in on my head.
电梯门就把我的头夹住了
Thankfully, the face is fine.
还好我的脸安然无恙
Don't worry. A few more tests
别担心只要再做几个测试
and this whole thing will be over before you know it.
这事就能马上结束了
Speaking of things that are gonna be over before you know it--
既然你说到马上就要结束的事情
Mom, not now. The man is practically dying.
老妈现在不行你看他都奄奄一息了
I'm sure it can wait. Well, what I have to say can't.
等等再说吧可我要说的不能等
Bonnie, when those doors were squeezing
邦妮当那电梯门挤啊挤啊
the blood out of my head,
挤得我头都快缺氧时
I swear my life flashed before my eyes.
我看见自己的一生在眼前闪过
And in that instant
那一瞬间
all I thought about was you.
我满脑子想的都是你
Bonnie...
邦妮
I love you.
我爱你
I love you too.
我也爱你
Yes! Whoo!
太棒了
Let's celebrate with some pants...
为了庆祝一下不如穿条裤子吧
'cause I can kinda see up your gown.
你的裙底风光都被我看完了
Okay, Emma, time to work your baby magic.
艾玛是时候让你大展身手了
Hello, baby stealer.
你好啊婴儿大盗
I think you mean "Bet loser."
还是该叫他"输赌专家"呢
What are you guys doing here?
你们俩怎么会在这
Oh, well, we were gonna go see that new disaster movie
本来我们正准备去看那部新出的灾难片