耻辱堂（2020）

Shameless Hall of Shame S01E01

Part 7 Dec. 30, 2020, 11:02 a.m.

Hey, Mrs. Patel,
你能偶尔给你的混♥蛋♥丈夫打个飞机吗
can you jerk your fuckin' husband off once in a while
那样他就永远不用再去我的"飞机房♥"解决了
so he doesn't come back to my rub and tug ever again?
赖诺普利[降血压药]Lisinopril.
我要不要谷歌♥一下查查这是治什么的
Should I Google it, see what it does?
不用给我吃几片我来告诉你
No, you should give me some, and I'll let you know.
有电动剃须刀牙买♥♥加朗姆酒
We have electric shavers, Jamaican rum...
还有这个
and this.
那上面还有根毛你要是敢拿这玩意碰我
That has a hair on it. You touch me with that,
我一定会打得你满地找牙
I will knock the teeth outta your head.
-让你满地找牙... -用这个吗
- I will knock the teeth-- - With this?
你♥他♥妈♥脑子有病啊
What the fuck is wrong with you?
-攻击 -你脑子抽了吗
- En garde! - What is wrong with you?
你脑子抽了吗
What the fuck is wrong with-- Oh, my--
别闹了
This is not funny.
我又不是《星球大战》里...
I'm not fucking Star Wars--
-你喜欢的类型是什么 -红毛
- What's your type? - Redhead.
-我下面是 -纯疯子
- I am downstairs. - Batshit crazy.
-符合 -九英寸的屌♥
- Check. - Packin' nine inches.
-什么意思 -他们
- What do you mean? - I mean people
会给她下迷♥药♥
will slip that bitch a roofie,
然后把她绑在椅子上折磨她
slap her to a chair, and pull her fucking teeth out.
-是我先捅他的 -不不是你
- I stabbed him first. - No, you did not.
-闭嘴吧 -你才闭嘴
- Oh, shut up. - You shut up.
别对我发号♥施令
Don't fuckin' tell me what to do.
如果你闭上你的臭嘴
If you shut your fuckin' pie hole,
我就不用对你发号♥施令了
I wouldn't have to tell you what to do.
是啊那可真是太阳从西边出来了
Yeah, please, that'll be the day,
伊恩·加拉格竟然不会跟在我屁♥股♥后面叨逼
when Ian Gallagher doesn't nag the shit outta my ass
对我发号♥施令
and tell me what to do about something.
如果你这辈子
You know, if you just wipe the toilet seat
擦过一次马桶垫我他妈也不用叨逼你了
for once in your life, I wouldn't fucking nag you.
如果你能把
If you just picked up
-剪掉的指甲捡起来... -谁他妈在乎
- your nail clippings! - Who gives a shit
这些破事我们可是在监狱啊
about any of that? We're in fucking prison!
-我在乎你个蠢猪 -那正是问题所在
- I do, you fuckin' pig. - That's the problem.
你们听上去像是一对老娘们儿在吵架
You sound like a couple of old broads.
如果你们再不闭嘴我就杀了你们
I'ma murder you two if you don't stop talking.
闭嘴我刚出狱
Shut your face. I just got outta prison,
所以完全不介意把手伸进你喉咙里
so I have no qualms about reaching down your throat,
穿过肠子从你屁♥眼♥里
through your intestines and out your fucking asshole
掏出你偷的东西
to take back whatever you stole.
我们都知道我们知道我们知道...
Okay, we both know what we know we know...
什么
that we know.
这句话到底他妈什么意思
The fuck does that mean?
曼迪在煎鸡蛋
Mandy's makin' eggs.
穿上衣服
Put some clothes on.
你俩看上去跟对基佬似的
You two look like a couple of fags.
有张ATM卡呢
There's an ATM card.
恭喜啊连该死的个人身份识别码都没有呢
Congratulations. It has no fuckin' PIN number.
你打算怎么做每天都去洗劫那同一个邮箱
What're you gonna do, rob the same mailboxes
直到他们把身份识别码寄过来吗
every day until they send the PIN?
我♥操♥ 不都说男人的家庭
Jesus Christ, what happened to a man's home
是他的坚强后盾吗
bein' his fucking castle?
三件事一这是我的家
Three things. This is my home,
二你的鸡♥巴♥确实小三这事是你自找的
you do have a small dick, and you started this,
谁叫你总把你老婆的逼
all because you thought your wife's worth more
看得那么金贵呢
than a couplea bucks a lay.
以我的经验来看她不值那个价
Let me tell you from my experience, she's not.
才220块
Two hundred twenty bucks.
你接了几个嫖♥客♥
How many Johnsons you squash.
17个
Seventeen.
打一次飞机才12块吗
That's like 12 bucks a wank.
你们知道吗有钱人居然连自己床单里
Do you guys know rich people count the number of threads
有多少根棉都知道去他的
in their sheets? Fuck that.
我连我床单上有多少污渍都数不清
I can't even count the number of stains in mine.
有句俗话说得好
You know what they say--
有其父必有其子
the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
喜欢鸡♥巴♥的儿子不算
It does if it lands on a dick!
他在干嘛
What's he doin'?
他在给我们买♥♥酒
He's getting us drinks.
这也太他妈♥逼♥真了
Crazy how realistic it looks.
我的拥抱呢
Where's my hug?
你的马子会喜欢的兄弟
Girlfriend's gonna love this one, bro.
不不是我马子是我妈
It's not my girlfriend. It's my mom.
你该在我开始画奶♥子♥之前
Oh, you shoulda told me that
告诉我的
before I started workin' on these titties.
妈的
Oh...fuck!
听说你的口♥活♥儿不错
I hear you give exquisite head.
不知道你的口♥技♥能跨越性别吗
I'm curious if your skills extend to both genders.
快滚操屁♥股♥的
Fuck off, rectum boy.
我不是来找米奇的我是来找你的
I'm not here to see Mickey. I'm here to see you.
怎么你想把我们都变成基佬吗
What, you trying to fagify all of us?
人不是变成基佬的这不是...
You don't fagify people. That's not how--
你什么毛病
What's your problem?
蛋黄酱的味道我受够了
Sick of the smell of goddamn mayonnaise.
就跟每天早上
It's like getting screwed
被土豆沙拉操一样
by a bowl of potato salad every morning.
你被爆口♥爆♥菊过吗
You were mouth and ass raped?
放屁我是爆别人的那个
You kidding? I did the raping.
米尔科威奇家的人绝不做受
Milkoviches don't bottom.
米奇是领养的吗
Was Mickey adopted?
你不管看什么鸟书
Is it as annoying as the way you lick your finger
翻页都要舔手指
every single time you turn the page
我有你烦人吗
of whatever faggety-ass book you're reading?
-行 -我叫伊恩
- Okay. - My name's Ian.
我没法像正常人那样翻书
I can't turn the page like a normal human being.
我必须把整只爪子都塞进嘴里去
I have to put my whole goddamn paw in my mouth.
其实你要是识字
You know what, if you actually knew how to read,
估计就能明白
maybe you'd understand.
而不是嚷嚷
Not, "Look at these fucking squiggle things
"看这整页的鬼画符"
all over this piece of paper!"
每天早上都吵
Every morning, the same shit.
你俩跟老娘儿们似的
You're like old women!
我为了躲我爸妈才来坐牢的
I came to prison to get away from my parents!
给本大爷舔菊吧傻♥逼♥
Eat my cornhole, cocks!
如果是蛋黄酱味的就算了
Not if it smells like mayonnaise.
你听听
Exactly!