耻辱堂（2020）

Shameless Hall of Shame S01E06

Part 5 March 2, 2021, 10:08 a.m.

for the last few years of my life.
那里没有孩子
There was no kids around that place.
所以迫使我改变了取向
Forced me to change my ways.
我想这年头谁都能去天堂
I guess they'll let anyone into Heaven these days.
我是来告诉你该怎么做才能也去天堂
I'm here to show you how to get there, too.
谢谢但是不用了
Thanks, but, no, thanks.
我不想再听你们这些鬼说的鬼话了
I don't wanna hear any more bullshit from you ghosts.
反正你说的也没一句真话
None of what you say is true, anyway.
你可以把那些假新闻塞回你自己屁♥眼♥里
You can shove all that fake-news shit up your ass.
说到屁♥眼♥...
Speaking of which...
-天呐 -好
- Jesus. - Okay.
好了
Okay.
这么大让我怎么吞啊
How am I supposed to swallow that?
谁说用吞的了
Who said anything about swallowing?
可怜可怜我吧不喝酒我的菊花塞不进任何东西
Have mercy on me. I can't handle anything up my ass without alcohol.
酒倒入这个袋子
Alcohol goes in this bag,
通过这个输入肛♥门♥
this goes up the poop chute, and voilà.
加拉格家的人要喝酒不止一种法子
More than one way to get booze into a Gallagher.
把它举得高且稳
Hold it up nice and high.
好了把阀门打开
Okay, open the valve.
我遵规守矩
I play by the rules.
你接下来应该要掰开屁♥股♥
This is the part where you spread your cheeks
然后咳嗽对吧
and...cough?
看见没你记性其实比你以为的要好多了
You see? You remember more than you give yourself credit for.
我把自己的生命还有血汗泪都倾注给了那工作
I gave my life, my blood, sweat, and tears to that job.
我得到了什么呢屁都没有一个
And where did it get me? Up the ass. That's where.
这头塞进屁♥眼♥
Right up the old poop chute.
世界要搞死你
The world's gonna fuck you.
感觉好极了
That feels fantastic.
你能怎么办
All you can do
只能任其蹂躏但绝不投降
is take it up the ass and soldier on.
好吧好吧好吧
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
我急需钱
I need money.
你还得接一些客
You got more takers!
跟我来弗兰克
Come with me, Frank.
等等希拉希拉
Oh, hold on. Sheila, Sheila.
来吧
Come on!
弄个安全暗号♥比较好
Shouldn't we have a safety word?
当然好的那咱们就弄个安全暗号♥
Sure, all right. Let's have a safety word.
"停" 当我说停的时候那就是咱们...
Uh, stop. When I say stop, that'll be our...
-没问题 -好的
- That'll do. - Stop.
停
Stop!
我甚至不惜奉献我的"后门"
I am literally taking it up the ass.
知道这是什么吗
Do you know what this is?
不行想都别想
No, no, no.
自♥由♥
Freedom!
插不进去
That won't fit!
老天啊你是要把拳头伸进来吗
Oh, Jesus. Is that your fist?
不是我的脚
No, it's my foot.
你屁♥股♥有过不疼的时候吗
Does your ass ever stop hurting?
可别啊饶了我
No, no, no, no...
一根小脚趾去赶集
This little piggy went to market.
没有
No.
一根小脚趾蹲家里
This little piggy stayed home.
建议你用雅维牌镇痛药
Advil's your best bet.
治疗发炎很有效
Helps with the inflammation.
一根小脚趾啃烤肉
This little piggy had roast beef.
另一根小脚趾干瞪眼
And this little piggy had none.
老天啊
Oh, God.
现在先吃颗止疼片
Take the Advil now
等感觉到疼了再吃就来不及
if you wanna stay ahead of the pain.
-不过这根小脚趾... -不不别啊
- But this little piggy... - No, no, no, no.
别让它回家别让它回家
Not all the way home. Not all the way home.
他直捣"家门"里啊
He went all the way home.
我这么做是不得已是为了谋生
I just did what I had to do to make a living
为了糊口
and to survive.
你还有时间赎罪弗兰克
There's still time to redeem yourself, Frank.
我不要
No.
-怎么做 -可以向你伤害过的每一个人道歉
- How? - Could apologize to everyone you've ever wronged.
你们好我是弗兰克·加拉格
Hi. I'm Frank Gallagher.
我们之前在网上聊过
We spoke online.
能容许我先对你说句谢谢吗
May I start by saying thank you?
你打算怎么骗人家
What's the scam?
我有偏头痛
I get migraines.
你觉得我是这种人吗
What kind of a man do you think I am?
有本事证明我没患偏头痛啊
Try proving I don't have them.
你肯定想骗人家弗兰克
There's always a scam, Frank.
我是弗兰克弗兰克·加拉格
I'm Frank. Frank Gallagher.
弗兰克·加拉格癌症管♥理♥员♥
Frank Gallagher, cancer concierge.
我帮助改善重症患者的心理
I smooth the way for patients with serious diagnoses.
你得为孩子们想想
You gotta think of the kids.
那是骗局向来都是各种骗局
It's a scam. It's always some kind of a scam.
你今天很幸运
This could be your lucky day.
你不能烧毁那位好心女士的家
You are not gonna burn down that nice woman's house.
你们刚才是想碰瓷我吗
Were you two trying to scam me?
不是烧毁
Not burn down.
弗兰克开始诈骗的时候
When Frank's running a scam,
就没人比他更值得信任了
ain't nobody better to trust.
她有责任险
She's got liability.
来一场大事故就能拿到保险金了
One big accident, and her insurance has to pay up.
你逗我吗这顶多就算个扭伤
Are you kidding me? This is barely a sprain.
你这个顶多两千
It's two grand, tops.
我需要十五万
I need 150.
你最好带条断腿来见我
You better bring me a mangled femur.
部分残疾
Partial paralysis...
或者瞎一只眼
or lose an eye.
身体至少30%烧伤
Burns over at least 30 percent of your body.
瞎两只就更好了
Lose both eyes.
你一进屋两个黑洞
You know, you walk in, empty sockets,
事情就成了
we got us a winner.
这个简直是杰作
This? This is a masterpiece.
这就像是世贸遗址的俯视图一样
This is like an aerial photo of Ground Zero.
能拿到10万美元就好
Just tell me we can get 100 grand.
10万美元没有问题
Oh, I'd say 100 Gs, easy.
早上好弗兰克·加拉格
Buenos días. Frank Gallagher.
弗兰克·加拉格弗兰克·加拉格
Frank Gallagher. Frank Gallagher.
恐怕今天我们俩得老老实实干活了
I'm afraid it's an honest day's work
我的朋友
for you and me, mi amigo.
想使什么骗局吗
Any scams you wanna try?
声东击西怎么样
How about the distract and grab?
也可以强买♥♥强卖♥♥
Do the melon drop.
还是老式的隔山买♥♥老牛
Old-fashioned pig in a poke?
我一直都很喜欢经典的乌克兰惊喜全家桶
I'm always down for a classic Ukrainian peekaboo.
我叫什么名字
What's my name?
贝瑟妮
Uh, Bethany?
就是我们啦
That's us.
你能放点古典乐吗
Could you put on a little classical music?
没问题
Yeah, sure thing.
糟了
Oh, shit!
女士看你干的好事你撞倒了那个男的
Watch what you're doing, lady! You just hit that man!
你还好吗
Are you okay?
你好像撞断了我的腿
I think you broke my leg.
-天啊 -我的脸都流血了
- Oh, God. - And my face is bleeding.
这年头去看急诊要多少钱
What are they hitting you for at the ER these days?
一两百块吧
Couple hundy.
我还是坐这里等我的腿自行痊愈吧
I'm just gonna wait till my leg heals.
除非你想弥补你的过错
Unless...you wanted to make things right.
他一发动引擎我们就行动
As soon as he starts his engine, we make our move.
没问题
Okay.
怎么了
What was that?
撞到那个坐轮椅的小孩了