夜间法庭（2023）

Night Court S01E14

Part 2 May 31, 2023, 8:28 p.m.

-We need to talk.
-当我还是个小女孩的时候... -这下完蛋了
-When I was a little girl... -We're screwed.
我听到过关于另一个小女孩的故事
-...I heard the story of another little girl.
她是条人鱼但是问题是她太通人性了
Now, she was half fish, but her problems were all too human.
译者：还好那时候还是人鱼不是清道夫，迪士尼罪大恶极
哦不
-Oh, no.
没错所以你明白我的意思了吗嗯？
-Yeah, so you see what I'm getting at, huh?
那是加布里埃尔
-It's Gabrielle.
-谁? -不要看！
-Who? -Don't look!
我高中的时候暗恋过她
I had a crush on her in high school.
-啊 -我们之间有点感应
-Ah. -We had chemistry.
同学
The class.
我不能让她看到我这个样子
I can't let her see me like this.
保持冷静尼尔保持冷静
Play it cool, Neil, play it cool.
不行我做不到
Nope, don't know how.
-尼尔.瓦卢里? -哦嘿！
-Neil Valluri? -Oh, hey!
我就觉得是你
-I thought that was you.
我也是!
-Me too!
我是说我知道我是尼尔嘿
I mean, I knew I was Neil. Hey.
你在法♥院♥做什么?
-What are you doing at the courthouse?
你看起来很受伤的样子
You seem pretty traumatized.
被抢劫了还是被非法入侵了?
Was it a robbery, a home invasion?
等等你现在是被挟持了吗？
Wait, are you being held hostage right now?
我也想啊!
-I wish!
哦可真是让人看不下去啊!
-Ooh, this is hard to watch!
这就是我现在每天都看到的尴尬场景
-This weirdness is what I'm dealing with every day now.
我过的不错我现在是名牙医
-I'm doing well. I'm a dentist now.
你可能还记得我对嘴巴一直很感兴趣
You probably remember. I always loved mouths.
-是啊! -它们能做很多事...
-Yeah! -They do so many things --
微笑交谈吃东西
smile, talk, eat.
-它们不像手臂那样懒惰 -完全同意!
-They're not lazy, like arms. -Totally!
手臂连着手的时间太长了
Arms have been riding hands' coattails for far too long.
是啊
-Yeah.
所以你到这来有什么事?
-So, what brings you here?
我是来办离婚的
-I'm finalizing my divorce.
我带了这些给档案室那些好人
I brought these for all the nice people in the records office.
-啊！ -唔!
-Aww! -Huh!
保持微笑这就是她应对问题的方法
The incessant smile, the way she's holding those treats --
她...让我觉得和你很像
she... kind of reminds me of you.
哦真的吗？我没觉得啊
-Oh, really? I don't see it.
我确定而且我觉得这能帮上我们
-I do, and I think it can help us.
哦而且额这些是我同事
-Oh, and, uh, these are my coworkers.
嗯嗨! 你知道吗既然我看到了那就不得不问一下
-Well, hi! You know, I saw those and I have to ask,
这些是不是茱莉亚.查尔德
are those the Funfetti cookie muffins
茱莉亚.查尔德，美国厨神，以制♥作♥法国料理闻名于世
著有"掌握烹饪法国菜的艺术""我的法兰西岁月"等书
被誉为"一个彻底改变美国人饮食观念的美食家"
"烘烤甜品合集"里的凡菲帝曲奇麦芬?
from Julia Child's "S'moredorable Collection"?
译者:未查到此书，也未找到对应词义，咨♥询♥了甜饼字幕的朋友拆分成
S'more dorable理解，做以上翻译，如有其他更好意见请留言
凡菲帝(Funfetti)本指一种在面糊和糖霜上撒上彩虹糖的蛋糕
好眼力这是我唯一记住的食谱
-Good eye. That's the one recipe I can remember.
我都不敢相信他们把那本书下架了
I can't believe they pulled that book off the shelves.
唔我知道这事! 这不是她的错
-Uh, I know! It's not her fault
十二宫杀手用这本书编了他其中一个密♥码♥
the Zodiac Killer used it for one of his cyphers.
十二宫杀手是美国最著名的连环杀手之一，活跃于上世纪六七十年代
被害人人数未知(至少七人)，其密♥码♥直到50年后才被破解
2009年才确定嫌犯为Jack Tarrance，而此时其已在3年前病逝
你知道吗事实上我买♥♥了2本
You know, I actually have two copies.
我可以匀你一本
You could totally have one.
这太棒了!
-That's so nice!
-哦自我介绍下我叫艾比 -叫我加比
-Oh, by the way, I'm Abby. -I'm Gabby.
很高兴认识你!
-[Both] It's so nice to meet you!
好吧是的可能我也明白了
Okay, yeah, maybe I see it.
这真是太感谢你了!
-Thank you so much for this!
哦! 快看茱莉亚呀
Oh! Just look at Julia,
在那堆曲奇里掐了她的烟
putting out her cigarette in that pile of cookies.
真是个不同的时代
-[Both] It was a different time.
好了差不多了
-Okay, that's enough.
艾比能认识你真是太棒了
It was real nice for Abby to meet you.
-拜拜 -她真是太棒了!
-Bye. -She's great!
嘿你觉得我是不也该把头发挑染成粉红色?
Hey, do you think I should do pink highlights in my hair?
我们不要纠结于
-Let's not get hung up on the fact
尼尔在高中时暗恋的对象就是你的翻版这件事了
that Neil's high school crush is basically a carbon copy of you
我们应该专注于这带给我们的机会
and let's just focus on the opportunity that we have here.
哦加比和我能赢得法♥院♥的烘培义卖♥♥
-Ooh, that Gabby and I can win the courthouse bake sale
这可以狠狠的挫挫萨尔的锐气
and knock Sal from probate down a peg or two?
不我是说我们应该撮合她和尼尔
-No, that we should set her up with Neil.
没错没错他们这对很般配
-Yeah, yeah, they'd make a great couple.
就像美女和野兽
-Like "Beauty and the Beast." [ Laughs ]
如果美女爱上了镇里
If Beauty fell for one of the townspeople
卖♥♥面包或者其他什么的人的话
who sold bread or something.
或者像我和兰德你知道吗我们是在
-Or like me and Rand. You know, we met
99.7美妙夏日音乐会上认识的
at the 99.7 Not Bummer Summer concert.
当Train乐队演奏"木星之泪"的时候我们在一起烤热狗
We roasted hot dogs together while Train played "Drops of Jupiter."
Train是一个来自美国加利福尼亚州旧金山的摇滚乐队，成立于1994年。
Drops of Jupiter是Train乐队的一个专辑，该专辑赢得了两项格莱美奖
好吧是Train(火车)的一个翻唱乐队...
Well, a Train cover band --
Train的主唱Patrick Monahan曾是著名翻唱乐队齐柏林飞艇的一员
Tram(有轨电车)
Tram.
那就这么定了
-So it's settled, then.
我会让尼尔去约加比
I'll get Neil to ask Gabby out
而你就别再和我说这个故事了
and you'll never tell me that story again.
等等这就是为什么他给你送了个火车?
Wait, is that why he sent you a train?
我现在真的希望这是什么性癖了
Now I really wish it was a sex thing.
好了各位我要在这个男人身边建立保护区
-Alright, everyone, I need to lock a perimeter around this man.
也就是说要离开六英尺卡罗尔
That means six feet, Carol.
这样好多了
That's better.
古尔斯你这是在干什么? 她都不是那个
-Gurgs, what are you doing? She's not even
最有可能伤害我的卡罗尔
the most likely Carol to hurt me.
那个卡罗尔在收发室
That's Carol in the mail room.
我和她说她的狗一点都不可爱
I told her her dog wasn't that cute.
不知道吗? 我们现在有互联网了
You know what? We have the Internet, nowadays.
伤害人的标准提高了很多
Standards are much higher.
听着我辜负过你一次
-Listen, I failed you once and it's not going
而这不会再次发生了所以从现在起
to happen again, so, from now on,
我会时时刻刻跟着你寸步不离!
I'm with you day and night, no exceptions!
除了明天因为我11：30要去做按♥摩♥
Except tomorrow, 'cause I got a massage at 11:30
如果你能和我一起去那就太好不过了
and it'd be great if you came with me.
哦好吧嗯不行因为我要过一个
-Oh, okay, well, no, you see, because I have
"平安无事"的中午
a "never going to happen" at noon.
-现在让我吃完我的午餐! -当然可以
Let me finish my lunch! -Of course.
我要先确保下它是否安全
I just need to make sure it's safe.
你在说什么...什么?
-What are you ta-- What?
-古尔斯你...
Gurgs, it's --
那么让我们等20分钟
Now, we're going to wait 20 minutes
看看里边是否下了毒
to see if the poison kicks in.
你这...去你的吧
-Are you -- Screw this.
我有三块三角巧克力在我桌里
I've got three Toblerone in my desk.
-我要回我办公室去了 -哦你不能单独回去
I'm going to my office. -Oh, not by yourself, you're not!
见鬼古尔斯
Oh, Gurgs.
卡罗尔我是怎么和你说的?
-Carol, what'd I tell you?
对我们的关系来说这真是一个重大进步
-This is a really big step in our relationship.
我很荣幸你让我来见你的牙医
I'm so honored that you wanted me to come meet your dentist.
关于这个...
-About that --
我马上就来
-Be with you in a sec.
我刚看完一个病人
Just finishing up with a patient.
是个红头发的所以止痛药不起作用
It's a redhead, so the painkillers didn't take.
译者:这是什么梗？有人知道请告诉我
等一下你带我来加比的诊室？
-Wait a minute. You brought me to Gabby's office?
我以为你是要和尼尔说去约她
I thought you were going to talk to Neil about asking her out.
我是这么想的但然后我试着想象了下尼尔约她的场面
-I was, but then I tried to picture Neil asking her out,
简直不能直视啊
and I just couldn't do it.
太可怕了大多数场景
It's shocking, the amount of scenarios
都是以他的脑袋被卡在蜜罐子里结束
that end up with his head stuck in a honeypot.
得了吧这没什么难
-Come on, it's not that hard to picture.
他只要走过去找他然后...哦哇哦!
He just walks up to her and -- Oh, wow!
他的头怎么这么快就进去了?